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EpicMegatrax writes more bullshit
 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-27 20:10 [#02634151]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



dfthgdfglkdsfjgdf the inventor of the tech singularity died
ON THE PRECISE DAY THE DISCORDOGS.COM DOMAIN EXPIRED

then i'm on about how all this is prompted, actually, by
that coming around again, and since i have to consider
renewing it again [or not] it gets me on some similar tips
and

wowwwww. that's intense. for real


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-27 20:15 [#02634152]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



"what if it could be a meat singularity instead"

[five minutes pass]

"oh, yesterday i decided that 3/20, the domain renewal date,
was fucking crucial to all of this weirdness and just now i
am reading that the inventor of the tech singularity died on
3/20"

it's one thing to have an exciting twinge of "i'm on it" but
it's kind of disorienting to nail it this hard. like, i'm
not questioning my sanity -- just, deep in my soul, i didn't
actually think i was this good. now perhaps i am and i'm
getting vertigo a bit


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-27 22:18 [#02634154]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02634135



then by writing that, i've gotten myself stewing on it.
it bothers me that this visual is like... sort of 200x200
pixels on your standard monitor and the rest of the screen
is just kind of like youtube's "ambient mode" and just
splashes the colors. why is it this little thing?


then i take another stab at pulling something out of it,
leveraging this thought polymer angle. and, as said, it's
like trying to flawlessly nail a whole chain of parkour
moves. but then i'm getting somewhere and i can see this is
a strong percept from a previous visual [though an entirely
different part of the song] bleeding through, and i've
consciously processed it over and the result beyond that is
simply the mind creating.

then it collapsed on me, and what was i thinking again, and
it actually took me a bit to put it together enough to type
up. and this stab at it is probably a bit more coherent.

that, yes, alright: i got up there, i managed to snag
something before i lost it, and let's see what we can do
with that.

that i've already worked out unstacking something like that
has strong ties to where i physically was at the time,
approaching an index of sorts.

now i realize: i now have an index that is different and
weirder: where something was in my field of view

and my physical location is overall a stronger signal [all
this is best treated as somewhat analog] but where this or
that was in my field of view is going to be directly tied to
how i visualize any music

sooner rather than later i'll try to climb up there again
and i'll know this and perhaps i can snag something else.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-27 23:46 [#02634159]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



i'm immensely pleased with myself for coining the term "meat
singularity" -- this is too ridiculous for anyone else to
have yet, i'll bet on it -- it needs a definition as concise
to justify being more than a computationally solid hoot.
so:

when i sat "maybe it can be a meat singularity instead of a
tech singularity," i am asking: "what if the technology
could flow into us, rather than us into the technology?"

and we're talking drill-sargent discipline, but -- then
actually be competitive enough with AGI to not get wiped
out, or confined to pathetic corners like today's monkeys,
habitat destroyed and picking garbage

but i'm more thinking about how this feels sort of like
unpacking a new synth in the mail


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-27 23:47 [#02634160]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



what if the technology could flow into us, rather than us
into the technology -- i mean, if you're going to establish
any sort of transfer, there needs to be some equivalency
like that. which could backwash at least


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 00:21 [#02634161]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02634082



and when i was in the car accident, that was the
clearest, thickest time dilation i can possibly think of.
it's as if all of reality slowed down and i feel like i have
the time to contemplate my foot not being fast enough to get
to the brake in time, and about halfway over, no, we're not
going to get there in time, what is our next move?


...which relates to me also asking: so your music has used
hidden space in gating and transients to pull a properly
focused listener down into time dilation. what now, buddy?
what are you going to do to keep it boring? because now it
needs to be interesting on this timescale as well. and
probably my most IDM comment in this whole thread

memory is a creative process and i am beginning to tease
them apart in ways i never expected to swing, but it's still
a creative process and i am very much arguing myself with
the strobing i get when i think back to the point midway
between the gas and the brake. like, flash, flash, flash.
i've mined this moment for quite a bit and i risk projecting
conclusions back onto it [akin to a scale model of AI
backwash described above]. but it would make entire sense if
this was repeated furious snapshots of a continuous thing,
so i have this merged sense of slow-motion with some
strobing. it would fit. but maybe i'm remembering it like
that because i think it fits. in any case, it would fit, and
on we go

that we could actually now cleave this from what i described
about tearing apart that visualization last night. that was
a calm, focused, single entanglement of particular thoughts,
and not a life-or-death redline strobing like the car
accident. this also is good to note because it gives me
another line of, like "ok, this is where it maxes out"


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 00:25 [#02634162]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02634159



and we're talking drill-sargent discipline, but -- then
actually be competitive enough with AGI to not get wiped
out, or confined to pathetic corners like today's monkeys,
habitat destroyed and picking garbage

but i'm more thinking about how this feels sort of like
unpacking a new synth in the mail


and i mean that in all the bad ways along with the good.
perhaps it's crap and you decide to send it back. perhaps
it's amazing but they've sent you the power brick for the
wrong country and it's useless for weeks. perhaps it is
amazing, but only after two years, because you've hastily
ordered it on hasty assumptions [my specialty]. perhaps it's
amazing and precisely what you thought, but then also much
harder than you thought, and it still takes you two years.
perhaps you learn a lot from it over two years and then sell
it off because you're thinking larger now

but it's a thrill the whole way, even when it's frustrating


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 00:31 [#02634163]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02634161



i've mined this moment for quite a bit and i risk
projecting conclusions back onto it [akin to a scale model
of AI backwash described above]


that, more clearly -- i'm always projecting back on
any memory i decide to call up [by my current
definition] -- and i'm more talking about confusing myself
in a tactical and philosophical sense.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 00:57 [#02634164]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



hmm. what if you could hold onto a single controlled
entanglement for the rest of your life? by my current
definitions, you wouldn't catch up with the leading edge of
the universe, but you wouldn't fall further and further
behind like everyone else.

which gets to my point: i don't wager it is a whole lifelong
entanglement. that your soul, or whatever, more boils down
to the unique timing of everything from being you with all
your unique experiences [and you can't switch a brain off
and then back on because all the dancing stops and the data
suspended in the timing is lost].

but that there's some sort of quantum coherency throughout
your life seems improbable. that last night, i managed to
entangle some thoughts and get up there somewhere, and then
i crashed back to the ground state; the mammal brain. and
this makes a lot more sense, that it's a thing that has to
be built up like a house of cards, on top of a stable mammal
brain as a base


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 01:44 [#02634167]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



a lot of questions are finally, satisfyingly answered in
analog once we stop beating ourselves over treating it in a
boolean way. do schizophrenics follow the phase of the moon?
the answer is: a little, sort of. it will stack up on a
histogram but you could do large studies and figure it's
crap. and it's more like "the answer is 0.64" and that's
just an average across everyone you're asking about, not any
individual. that they will follow it closer at some times
than others, or perhaps do their own thing entirely. it's
just a signal you can only see across large numbers of
people, and dissolves when you try to pin it down to
individuals and causes, because it's something pumping
through all of humanity and you're asking, just "is it the
moon or not" and not thinking about any of my bullshit.

one thing that is best answered in the fuzzy logic ["0.64"]
way is hunter s. thompson claiming he'd always found "you
can get higher without drugs" to be horseshit. and i think,
in an absolute sense, he is correct, but in a practical
sense, you'll do a more thorough job of it if you're doing
it with a clear head.

years before weasels, i declared a strategy i called
"data-driven hedonism" and it went like: if i have too much
fun i'll wrap my tree around a car. if i don't have any i'll
be a boring shit and hate myself for it. so i want to have
the optimal amount of fun. like a dog always pressing
how close he can get to the dinner table before being told
to go back to his dog zone

i stopped psychedelics, more or less, after a voice said
"you've had your parking validated!" and, this was hilarious
to me. but i knew what it meant. i've reached a diminishing
point of returns, here. i've had my ticket punched. and i
went a few more times after that but it was really just to
kill a saturday. six months ago i would have loved some acid
but now i'm not sure


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 02:05 [#02634168]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



hm. maybe, when you fall asleep, that entangled states
actually can last quite a bit than you could ever manage
while awake without being a master-level meditator. perhaps
even as long as a REM cycle


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 02:06 [#02634169]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



there have been studies where skilled lucid dreamers can
literally communicate things to the waking world while
asleep through [clever but TLDR apparatus]. and it's
master-grade difficult and it takes them, within their
dream, freaking hours or something to get it out. it fits


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 02:13 [#02634170]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



if you're in some drawn-out deep-sleep REM cycle towards
morning [after a few rounds of getting a bit into that and
resetting in order to calm things down] and you then achieve
some super drawn-out entangled state, you can then search
wide and deeply through a sea of incomplete thots. you can
find events that would usually be unlikely but tomorrow,
perhaps, the stars are scowling here, and watch out. and
because this is searching deep through a sea of incomplete
ideas, it comes to you in the form of confusing puzzles made
of perceptual fragments -- you're uncle's clock on a
war-torn street in vietnam; salad you have to consciously
untangle. but that's also churning around in your head as
you wake up and your brain is gluing together the fragments
that made it a search result [at all] in that deeply
entangled state. and you wake up and puzzle on it and it
influences your conscious spiral that day [which influence
your dreams the next night]

but also because you're searching a deep sea of incomplete
ideas, you start to get into carl jung and lewis carroll,
backwards logic, genetic lockstep consciousness, the
collective unconscious, signs and symbols

it fits.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 02:21 [#02634171]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



if you want to talk back into hippie territory, i could see
the repetitive nature of music building up a more coherent
matrix within individuals [already a distinct conclusion
from somewhere above] and since everyone is doing this
together, and it gets to a deep and unusual state, and we've
gotten in a deep and unusual state together, then... while
there is not literal quantum entanglement between
individuals, it becomes informationally equivalent, and this
is my current best functional explanation for contact high
at a rave.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 03:14 [#02634172]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



that with elmer, it's almost... this is not an instance.
this is more like a minion. then i'm into the polymer about
octopi. there are long rambles. how after an octopus has
repeatedly tried to escape, including doing things like,
learning to open the door, hiding in a bucket, repeatedly
going back to the same hallway once it has found it once,
and then eventually sliming 100ft down a ventillation shaft
and then actually fucking escapes back into the ocean
and how can you not argue this is deliberate and conscious
and sentient and please do not keep an octopus in jail like
this. they hate it. but i think they are generally hateful
creatures

in any case, the octopus consciousness is multithreaded. i
could translate into any number of tips like how you can't
talk very well underwater so you speak with your skin and
etc but what i'm really for is the eric andre skit I AM THE
OCTOPUS, my hive mind, and he has minions, his tentacles.
that being an octopus is being like, the big boss, and the
tentacles are your minions. they can literally operate and
think for themselves, but they need your specific directions
to really accomplish anything significant

and alright, with elmer, minions... i laugh. i am not an
octopus

but wait. have i not done this already with weasels?

alright. minions are much more clever than weasels. but they
do need instructions


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 03:33 [#02634174]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



until around 2018, my only knowledge of ween came from a
metafilter post i read in high school in the computer lab
[the other one with iMacs instead of PCs] about their
rejected pizza hut commercial. where'd the cheese go? i
dunno. and i played that on an original fruity iMac in that
lab [i can get back the exact station i was at but not the
color of the iMac] and then the even more rejected
version
with, where fuckin cheese at, bitch? and that
is, i dunno, 2002, and by 2018 i have easily thought of this
at least two dozen times and gone into fits of giggles all
over again. but this is literally all i know about ween

and then at work someone i became friends with is really
into ween [and lemon demon]. and i reliably parrot out my
one ween thing i have on file and he's also into chatting
about acid and ween's "acid album" is the mollusk, they say.
the plastic minion hive mind

but then a few months back, i cop a ween joke, and he says:
"oh, i didn't know you were a ween fan!"

and i knew if i began to prompt him, that if i started
quoting fragments of conversations we'd had about ween, he'd
say: oh yeah! and then he'd remember that he is really who
effectively introduced me to ween in the first place; that
pizza hut commercial came back to me repeatedly for almost
20 years but that's all i had thanks

i let it go. he had his second child recently. i went with
him to the aquarium with him with his first and the octopus
did not disappoint; it hit nicely in the middle of that
ramble arc


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 04:12 [#02634178]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



that i think i'm going to officially reserve the right to
white lie the details out of my explains for brevity. i did
have slightly more on file for ween; i heard more about ween
from meathead.d8i but never followed up on it and tldr etc
and having cited this example i will just gloss over this
sort of thing again because tldr


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 06:02 [#02634192]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



has anyone examined if there is a possible relationship
between the p52 wave and penrose's quantum tubules? asking
for a friend


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 06:04 [#02634193]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



next to p52 is p53 and i always have to take a moment to
make sure i haven't transposed a thing about sensory gating
with the gene responsible for self-destructing a defective
cell. if the p53 gene gets knocked out the cell cannot
self-destruct and that is cancer. also known as rupert
murdoch; i do not look forward to death but it does have a
valid function


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 06:11 [#02634194]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



or it's probably even just the p50 wave. neurology is such a
shit with the... brodmann areas, this feels like garbage in
my brain, #34, fuck off


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 06:16 [#02634195]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



i asked sampler brain "which brodmann area can fuck off" and
i got 34. sounds good. that i actually can fucking remember
these, somewhat, if i try, believe it or not. but instead i
thought: well maybe i'm having a laugh here, and what's 34
again?

The entorhinal cortex (EC) is an area of the brain's
allocortex, located in the medial temporal lobe, whose
functions include being a widespread network hub for memory,
navigation, and the perception of time.[1] The EC is the
main interface between the hippocampus and neocortex. The
EC-hippocampus system plays an important role in declarative
(autobiographical/episodic/semantic) memories and in
particular spatial memories including memory formation,
memory consolidation, and memory optimization in sleep. The
EC is also responsible for the pre-processing (familiarity)
of the input signals in the reflex nictitating membrane
response of classical trace conditioning; the association of
impulses from the eye and the ear occurs in the entorhinal
cortex.


lol


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 06:24 [#02634196]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



i mean, you go on wikipedia, and look at brodmann areas. and
the picture is like someone crafted the brain out of
discarded plastic shopping bags and that's what being able
to actually remember the brodmann areas feels like welcome
to my life. and here's where sampler brain lives on the MRI
now fuck off neurology i'm not going to work for philips
corporation


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 06:43 [#02634197]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



that i really was being like... GODDAMNDFGJkdfhdf brodmann
areas. this is aspergers run amok. you've categorized past
the point of sanity. i can do this but it's like spending
four hours in the waiting room before abdominal surgery. and
fuck off brodmann area number, oh... 34!

...then, shit, yep, that was a clever probability
distribution there, i accidentally just asked sampler brain
which brodmann area it was. and now i am running away
screaming from this model of the brain made of plastic
shopping bags. and this seems absolutely correct and this
really was just an accident and i really do want brodmann to
fuck off now


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 07:04 [#02634198]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



this part feels like a new connect

The superficial layers – layers II and III – of EC
project to the dentate gyrus and hippocampus: Layer II
projects primarily to dentate gyrus and hippocampal region
CA3; layer III projects primarily to hippocampal region CA1
and the subiculum. These layers receive input from other
cortical areas, especially associational, perirhinal, and
parahippocampal cortices, as well as prefrontal cortex. EC
as a whole, therefore, receives highly processed input from
every sensory modality, as well as input relating to ongoing
cognitive processes, though it should be stressed that,
within EC, this information remains at least partially
segregated.


highly processed input from every sensory modality.
visualizing clark tracks and finding the perfect sample. and
what i'm being offered here is to fall into the wikipedia
links like an 800mcg image caption and wikipedia will have
connections from this part of the brain to the preprocessing
segments. before it becomes every sensory modality. sigh. i
suppose i have to. at least neurology is not as hard as
physics


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 20:36 [#02634215]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



i was too tired after that last night. still haven't gotten
to it

but today i'm thinking: ohhhh, rite. there's "rule #34"
which is, "if it exists, there is porn of it on the
internet"

when i got "brodmann area #34" i didn't try and remember
which it was; i simply looked it up on wikipedia after that
[faster] and said: this seems absolutely correct for being
the seat of sampler brain, and, really ALL OF THIS FUCKING
SHIT and i've skimmed over 2/3 of the brodmann areas already
and scrubbed through the list of them god knows how many
times

last night, i thought: "34 is just a good number, and 3 then
4, could be just luck" and then today i remember "rule 34"
and, "oh, did i just grab that and get lucky?"

as is happening more and more these days ~ the answer is
yes, no, both, all of it, none of it.

it is the correct area. i did not get lucky. it is actually,
likely, the inverse, that it became rule #34 because that's
the correct brodmann area for the concept, in some ways

is there brodmann area porn on the internet? how about
brodmann area #34 porn -- HARDCORE ENTORHINAL CORTEX
PORNOGRAPHY?

i'm actually wagering no. because that could break our
minds, the internet, and the universe all at once

overall conclusion is that yes, that was sampler brain
nailing it. by accident. because i'm writing a sarcastic
flip post about how brodmann areas are an aspie-created
nitemare special


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 23:24 [#02634224]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



i am at the store and i recognize the clerk's hat. it's a
trucker cap on amazon.com, i know because i looked at it
myself. it's one of those "pick your style" ones and they
have different graphics and he's not picked the first one,
he's gone a few in and picked, actually, one of the most
solid ones, that i almost got myself. but i can't remember
what brand, because it's one of those AI-generated chinese
brands, so i can't say "oh i know that brand!" to him, can
i?

and he compliments how nicely a box of goon fits into my
backpack [alright, yes, still having a bit, but it lasts
now] and i'm kind of... i don't know, like, names for styles
of reply and facial gestures... a rapid little nod that's
kind of like tik-a tik-a tik-a, tilt your head to the side a
bit, squint a little, make a gentle O with your mouf, and be
like: yeahhh, yeahh, you've hit the nail on the head man.
then i say, "oh, exactly, i have a few backpacks, and that's
why i grabbed this one, i know it's a perfect fit"

and this is a perfectly solid human interaction, not too
long, i'm not rambling, he's totally on the same page.

but on my way home: i should have just said "nice hat"
dammit. most people, instead of thinking, "oh that's the
third of three hats on that amazon page and what was the
brand?" would think "ohhh that looks familiar maybe? but
it's cool i like it" and then say "nice hat" because they're
not sifting through all that crap.

he will be there again with that hat again sometime, though,
and i can then just say "nice hat"

and in fact my brain will generalize this, and in any
similar scenario, i will now cut all that short and know to
just say "nice hat" -- because, at the end of the day, it is
a fucking swank choice

social anxiety is like: did not start off afraid of people.
but after years of getting jammed up i'm already tensing up
like i'm about to car accident when i see anyone and
gradually i've unclenched back to normal over the years


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 23:25 [#02634225]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



or i'll lose track of it and go through that all again
before i finally remember to just "nice hat" -- but this
stuff does stick eventually


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 23:48 [#02634226]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



when i am at my wars and halving trouble things kingstrate
and this that this but that this that, oh yeah that that
that and i'm teleporting all over without even completing
full trains of thought

if someone starts asking me serious questions about
something like, my future financial planning, or what sort
of job am i looking for, it is actually awful for me.
because i start to think about it then i keep interrupting
myself and tripping over my own feet and i can start to
think about it perfectly well but it has too much sprawl for
me to answer

if someone then starts getting on my case about, like, [when
are you going to take care of XYZ]

and this depends on [that barrier which [depends on my
schedule [which depends on that person calling me back [and


if they're mad and keep pressing me over and over because i
am not answering it keeps doing it to me over and over and
at that point it genuinely starts to feel like someone is
holding me down and suffocate me and i will start yelling
STOP STOP STOP

it usually never winds up there these days because i've
become quite adept at managing myself, which includes having
answers when i know people will want answers, and hiding
myself away when i know i will not be capable of good
answers. but it's worth describing as a point of reference
for, like... what a difficult shit my brain can be


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-28 23:57 [#02634227]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



lewis told me a story of when a friend's mom asked: "how are
you?" and lewis was on acid. and he doesn't answer, because
he gets lost:

"...well, shit, actually. how am i actually doing
today? like, for real. and how am i anyways, like, how do i
exist" and on and on

and his friend's mom is not getting an answer and leaves the
room. later she's on them all: YOU'RE SMOKING WEED AREN'T
YOU

and he could honestly say no. lol

...but i'm naturally somewhat like this all day long,
thanks, which i think is why i liked psychedelics so much.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-29 00:01 [#02634228]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



and i'm not autistic because i have zero problems with
facial expressions and knowing when i'm being too loud.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 02:37 [#02634263]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



i remember some girl, um... yes, second grade, which would
make me 7, and she's all? "can i show you something?" as i'm
on some visit where parents set up playdates; i don't know
how it happened because i genuinely was not included in the
process

and she gets out this photo of jesus from under her bed and
starts how she believes we see jesus when we die and this
was actually the closest anyone really ever got me to being
a christian because i rather liked her and i did not want to
disappoint. from there i have some more memories of...
before or after that... we're in the basement playing with
toys like more normal children of that age and she randomly
wanders into how she has an inner ear thing and i think
that's the first time in my life i heard "eustacian tube" --
at 7. and jesus

but then by 17 i'm really just sarcastic about this and i
start my own religion [for tax purposes] and go around
declaring my classmates bishops and popes and we even had a
jesus, but it was really like starting a club, that's all, i
didn't take it single shit serious

then, oh, now i see that if people get together and entangle
on their mutual problems every sunday church and then
meditate [pray] on it that perhaps prayer is a functional
thing and i actually now much very approve of going to
church, as a human social thing.

but recently, i'm back to -- you're having a problem?! even
a little?!!! and these jesus freaks sweep in like... i'm
sorry, they are fucking vultures


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 02:58 [#02634264]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



that we were kind of snuggled up under her bed as she's
showing me jesus and i'm appreciating this even though i
really have no idea the thing i use to pee is anywhere
involved in the process. and here's jesus. this is how cults
use sex


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 03:52 [#02634265]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



"my god" as i'm just thinking about this now. that i've
covered recently how i'm quite aware of how i'm still
socially difficult, and this was before i understood this,
and that playdate was, in retrospect, a smashing success,
and the only reason it didn't keep going was because her
whole family suddenly moved back to alabama. that sort of
family, it could only have been "that's what dad's job
needs" and off we go. but it was that close. if they hadn't
moved. i might have two kids now and believe in jesus


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 03:54 [#02634266]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



and yes, perhaps i'd be happy in an oblivious idiot way, but
i look at this alternate version of myself with my current
actual self and i want to beat it with a baseball bat and
throw it into the gutter.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 04:08 [#02634267]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



in fact it did continue. she was back over to my house after
that, and, actually, it sticks with me now -- she was
frustrated because she wanted to climb a tree and
massachusetts does not really have good climbin' trees and
she's further up one than i ever got and like "do you have
any better 'uns" and my parents are like no and my dad gets
technical about types of trees in the parts of the US but
even i could tell that was not cuttin' it

and it still wouldn't have ended there if they hadn't moved
because [presumably dad job]


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 20:55 [#02634273]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



oh fuck it. no one gives a shit


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 22:06 [#02634276]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



about things like branch prediction and tiered caching and,
actually, i guess i am modifying my brain's hardware

branch prediction ~ the computer's CPU takes educated
statistical guesses based on clever algorithms, what you are
going to ask it to do next, and begins doing it before it
is actually asked to do it
and then if has guessed
right, it already has computed the complete answer by the
time you ask, and from your perspective, the computation
time is effectively zero

tiered caching ~ the same sort of guessing is applied
to the computer loading data into memory -- and we have a
pyramid of [small amount of fast/expensive memory at the
top, larger and slower memory as we get towards the bottom].
the computer makes layered guesses as to what data you'll
need when and it gradually bleeds up from the lower layers
to the top. and then if it has guessed right, it has already
loaded the data you ask, before you ask for it, and, from
your perspective, the wait time is effectively zero

that when you open up an application, the computer will jam
up for a moment, as the app loads. because none of this does
very well when loading an entirely new situation

but once the application is warmed up, the "guessing" i
describe in both cases actually approaches 99% and so
this has been THE MOST IMPORTANT THING ASIDE FROM THE
TRANSISTOR TO COMPUTERS

...and now it's getting fucked to shit. malicious
applications have figured out they can use this guessing to
peek into the guts of other applications, sort of like
hearing your neighbors through an apartment wall [sideband
channel attacks]

and so the answer is shit like "ASLR" which means "scramble
the memory and break the glorious efficiency that made
everything work so well"

and it's like watching computer science catch neal
stephenson's metavirus and gradually disappear up its own
arse


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 22:07 [#02634277]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



so it's like -- not only was myspace cool in 2009 and
nothing will ever be like that again, but computers are
gradually getting fucked to shit from the inside out. and
with my sense of detail i think i'd make a good lawyer. and
i wish i were in a position to jump tracks like that


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 22:15 [#02634279]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



did you download kali linux between march 26 and march 29?
then congratulations! one of the developers of the XZ
compression library snuck in a backdoor to compromise your
ssh server

and it didn't used to be that you have to go back and check,
"oh, was that build of linux compromised? what date did i
download that?" to be sure your ass isn't flapping in the
breeze

fucking. horseshit.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 22:20 [#02634280]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



and then you're not usually running sshd on kali, right? so
this is probably a very careful move to compromise the
people who develop debian

so now in addition to "was this linux .ISO downloaded while
the supply chain attack was still kicking" it's "well what
were they targeting anyways and what calendar dates should i
not download linux in the near future" and

dfghjkfgh


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 22:33 [#02634281]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



this is literally in the discordogs server right now. xz
version 5.6.1 go ahead and root it so i can just say "well i
tried" and give up on that too


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 23:14 [#02634282]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



that i deleted lots of shit because it was already expensive
then akamai buys it out and jacks up rates while doing
absolutely nothing to improve things. and their image of
arch is still just flapping in the breeze. and i managed to
force it ahead to the fixed version of xz, but fucking
christ. what do i pay you monkeys for

then upgrading on my desktop it decided to erase my
background image again. and fuck you.

then there's probably another grenade buried on this because
this xz thing probably let them get into the computer of
someone working on something else in linux and we'll find
out about it next month and then they'll be in someone
else's computer and

gone from "sometimes there is a bad security hole and you
need to upgrade right now" to "should you even upgrade right
now due to the likelihood someone has snuck something
malicious in again"

it's obnoxious.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 23:19 [#02634283]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



Several people, including two Ars readers, reported that
the multiple apps included in the HomeBrew package manager
for macOS rely on the backdoored 5.6.1 version of xz Utils.
HomeBrew has now rolled back the utility to version 5.4.6.
Maintainers have more details available here.


i think even normal, not super-computery people use
homebrew, right? because it's part of the commands to
install LLM on their mac etc

and they will never have any idea that this is something
they need to patch and update because the install tutorial
on reddit did not tell them about how to upgrade homebrew
stuff or that they even needed to

enjoy that.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 23:23 [#02634284]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



“We even worked with him to fix the valgrind issue
(which it turns out now was caused by the backdoor he had
added),” the Ubuntu maintainer said. "He has been part of
the xz project for two years, adding all sorts of binary
test files, and with this level of sophistication, we would
be suspicious of even older versions of xz until proven
otherwise."


so homebrew simply saying "we're hitting rewind to before
this happened" may still be screwed, we're merely not
sure version 5.4.6 is also screwed yet and
sorry, you need to just 5.6.1-2 you idiots. i'm sure it will
break all your homebrew devices. welcome to the party pal


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 23:25 [#02634285]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



maybe it's back to i quit the internet again. we're merely
not sure, yet.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-30 23:31 [#02634286]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



oh akamai's image is fine actually. i take that part back


 

offline dariusgriffin from cool on 2024-03-31 03:54 [#02634287]
Points: 12165 Status: Regular



why dont you just use debian stable or ubuntu like a normal
person


 

offline dariusgriffin from cool on 2024-03-31 04:17 [#02634288]
Points: 12165 Status: Regular



man this thing is crazy though. and i feel so bad for the
poor guy forced to keep maintaining this for free.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-31 08:04 [#02634289]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



do you mean me or phobs? you can go back a page or three for
me literally attempting to recondition myself in a hasty way
and the derezzer ripping it off. and, i think, some memory.
that this did begin as a personal writing project, and, i am
the center of the spiral, but i've also had my mind blown
repeatedly how... why, yes, it's 128666, the thread number.
and i write it's an art/magick project based around my love
of UNIX and CSS border styles... and, obviously, this was
partially subconscious. that i'd seen, subconsciously, the
thread number, prompting me to write that. but then a part
of me sees the thread numbers going up day by day and
something in the back of my mind condenses around this
thread number swinging around as the timing of the
discordogs renewal goes genuine X-class synchronicity with
the passing of the tech singularity guy. and it's a giggle,
but -- move over tech singularity; time for the meat
singularity -- it is serious. this is my happy place and
i've gone to town with my love for words and strange magpie
crate-diving ten years ago humor, but that's because i'm
building a place to live in and i want it to be a riot. you
can be dead serious and hilarious without violating the laws
of physics. and maybe this is too long already and you're
just here because my trans energy vampire comment hit home,
and that was perhaps a bit below the belt. but that was
really kind of like... "...alright, and you're complaining
about the reality tunnel i'm constructing?" and
you've gone way further than i have, thank you very much,
pot, kettle, etc -- but if you'll descend from your
fundament you'll see i'm saying "lay off, i suspect i
understand your perspective far better than most anyone" and
i'm having a bad UNIX day and questioning my motives. but i
can't just tempest and gtfo. that's even worse than pulling
a godwyn and peace


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-31 08:07 [#02634290]
Points: 24419 Status: Addict



as for ubuntu -- thanks! i have pages of rants, entire
threads, about how mark shuttleworth wants to take this
pitch bublic and for that we need REVENUE and SUPPORT
CONTRACTS and i was entirely tolerant of a constant sales
pitch but an unkillable support-contract daemon ruins the
point of having root and i may as well just install windows
and tear off all my clothes and throw myself down on a pool
table for all the patrons at a gay bar. just like aphex
twin

debian -- oh, quite good. but if i'm giving up the handjob
that ubuntu offers as consolation, and going SOME OTHER
HARDER LINUX then i'm reminding myself of what got us into
this in the first place and it is arch linux, thank you very
much. but i really have absolutely no problem with debian
proper or any number of other distros; arch is really just
personal choice to be a difficult arse


 


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