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offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2022-06-19 08:49 [#02619317]
Points: 18887 Status: Addict



i just feel utterly beset by bullshit right now. we're
switching your electric provider unless you opt out. i opt
out, and they switch me anyways. that sort of thing, just
wolves at the door eager to rip me off, and struggling to
dole out the little capacity i have to stop as much as i can
from going out the door.

then, now, i am squooshing ants on the kitchen ceiling lite.
like, oh, they're getting in here, and there, i let the
landlord know. but then i squoosh one on the light a bit too
vigorously, and the cover falls off, and it turns out there
are like 30 ants in there, and i know this as they rain down
on top of me, the kitchen island, the floor. this is not how
i wanted to be spending saturday nite at 1am, vanquishing
ants with a vacuum in a miasma of twitchy adrenaline

they are clearly coming in from above the lite fixture
somewhere. or were, they've given up for the moment. but
fuckers will try again, i guarantee it

then it's the same as the electric provider: when the
landlord sends the exterminator, i have to be very careful
to ensure he's not just saying "oh it's fine" and letting it
go until it's bad enough he has to say "oh i have to
fumigate the house for $$" and i have to pay for a hotel or
some shit. because that is how shit is now


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2022-06-19 09:43 [#02619318]
Points: 18887 Status: Addict



when i was like... still young enough to ask little kid
questions, but old enough to start to get a bit deep with
them... i asked my dad: what happens to bugs once they go
inside the vaccum? can they get out?

because, really, i was just nervous they'd come back.

"oh, no, they just die essentially" is about what he said.
and now, with a vacuum full of ants, i find myself wondering
about this. has anyone really, actually studied the
problem? at their level of biomechanical scale, ants can
withstand quite a bit, in the same way a sci-fi movie ant
attacking tokyo would collapse under its own weight. so
would the journey down the vacuum really be enough to do
them in? but then they're into a pile of minimally hydrated
debris and maybe that... but, fuck it, i'm going to go
squint at the vacuum. full of ants.


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2022-06-19 09:45 [#02619319]
Points: 6744 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



lol,
that switch scene is comedic gold reminiscent of joes
apartment^^

ah, well,
sure you need to call the ghostbusters?
i had ants in the kitchen too once. they formed a very
productive line from the window that was open at all times
in summer, from the yard straight to where i left my
assorted collection of used knives with remnants of bread
spread. i had seen an ant before in the kitchen, but this
was getting out of hand. so i cleaned that area and most of
the kitchen to wipe their trackmarks, kept an eye on that
and checked the food storages.
they were gone a couple of days after.

never had to squoosh an ant at that time, but when i saw
that honey knife coverd in black, i thought about that
survival guy who put ants in his water to make bush
lemonade. so i just picked up the knife and licked it clean
in one go.


 

online belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2022-06-19 09:45 [#02619320]
Points: 5872 Status: Lurker



ant powder, man. sprinkle where they're getting in and
wherever you see em congregating. i've had to do something
similar with these little carpet beetles that appeared
recently.


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2022-06-19 09:51 [#02619321]
Points: 6744 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



yeah, just cut them off.
no way in, and no food to gather, they will get theirs
someplace else.


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2022-06-19 09:52 [#02619322]
Points: 6744 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



probably wont even need poison.

honestly i believe that nothing dies at once in a vacuumer,

but rather has a very bad and slow way to go at the other
end.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2022-06-19 10:06 [#02619323]
Points: 18887 Status: Addict



so they haven't escaped the vacuum, but they're already
pooling back up in the ceiling lamp.

and i get this about ants. i was actually living at a place
i found through a watmm member, actually, who also lived
with me in this charmingly dysfunctional household. one day,
i am taking a shower, and suddenly, ants are just marching
in through a hole. i stop the shower and dress hastily,
running out the door: ANTS! ANTS! WE NEED TO PLUG THE HOLE

obviously everyone thought i was nuts at first, but by the
time i was back up there with some mortite everyone had gone
over and seen the ants, shit, that's a lot of ants

and this is what is freaking me out, really: they're coming
in. through. the. ceiling. lamp. which is like a florescent
office lite, except it's an LED strip. and if they're in
there, sure, i can plug it up, but... they're already in the
fucking ceiling m8?

and at that point you need to go spray a perimeter around
the house, in addition to finding their point of ingress,
and neither of these are things i really have the
time/expertise/equipment for

landlord has said ok to exterminator. i hope the timeline is
short


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2022-06-19 10:07 [#02619324]
Points: 18887 Status: Addict



there is no food to gather. i run a relatively clean ship in
the kitchen. now it's freaking hermetic. but still, they
pool into the lamp dome; fall out eventually


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2022-06-19 10:08 [#02619325]
Points: 18887 Status: Addict | Followup to belb: #02619320



borax, right. again, not really something i want to do with
the ceiling lamp, and again, they're in the ceiling m8


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2022-06-19 10:20 [#02619326]
Points: 6744 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



right, your house is built differently to the ones i ´ve
lived in.

you know you ought to be writing for t.v., epic.
i can see that shower scene as the one everyone is talking
about in that teenage comedy.



 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2022-06-19 10:23 [#02619327]
Points: 6744 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



heading into the yard now for a read.
there are two 30cm ant towers in there right now, btw.
they look freaking amazing.


 

online belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2022-06-19 10:25 [#02619328]
Points: 5872 Status: Lurker | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02619325



ah yes gravity and electricity, my mortal enemies

maybe a homebrew shrink ray and tiny mecha suit to fight the
ants one on one? fuckers gotta go, i feel yr creepy-crawly
pain. i can't sleep atm for feeling all itchy about my
little visitors


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2022-06-19 10:51 [#02619329]
Points: 18887 Status: Addict



the neighbor down the street "runs" a "landscaping company"
which means he has a truck with a logo and a phone number.
his lawn is a disaster. there is a constant pool of much
from the runoff of his truck that i habitually leap over. i
finally get a look at him recently, out front chatting to a
neighbor, and he's a hardcore ginger patronizing irish
catholic sort; it's clear as a bell. and just now i'm
thinking i should call him up and say: "i have a mess of a
lawn for you to fix!" and then we get along negotiating
schedule and rates and finally, alright, what's the address?
and then i give him his own home address

and it's also clear as a bell he'd go off like a rocket and
i'm having a right giggle at the idea. but, no, let's not,
let's just share the laugh and not actually do it. but
that's the mood i'm in; i seriously considered it for a
moment


 

offline RussellDust on 2022-06-19 11:44 [#02619330]
Points: 15389 Status: Lurker | Followup to belb: #02619320



They come out in the heat.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2022-06-19 11:54 [#02619332]
Points: 18887 Status: Addict



*night


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2022-06-19 21:39 [#02619337]
Points: 3789 Status: Regular



When I have ants I spray raid on their trail and where I see
them coming in and they never come back, at least from that
direction. Does smell for a day though- and I don't like
wiping out little lives like that. But I will if you're in
my house.


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2022-06-19 21:44 [#02619338]
Points: 3789 Status: Regular



seconds after typing that last post a yellow jacket entered
my office (a small shed) where my door is open. It went
right up to a healing scab on my leg and tried to land on
it. I thought it was a fly at first, but nah this is a
yellowjacket (fake bee) with a stinger.

I shocked it with an electric zapper I use for mosquitos. It
fell on the floor wriggling and I ended it quickly.

Sounds like a fake story with the timing but I'll put it on
my mother's life.


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2022-06-20 04:09 [#02619342]
Points: 30288 Status: Regular | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02619332



don't start that one! its 100% heat!


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2022-06-20 04:15 [#02619343]
Points: 30288 Status: Regular



There was an argument on watmm where the Americans were
hearing its as night, and the UK saying it was heat, and
Richard changed his soundcloud profile to "HEAT" once and
for all, not that it makes much difference.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2022-06-20 06:25 [#02619349]
Points: 18887 Status: Addict



after i cleaned them out of the lamp, they gave up for a
bit. then, as i figured, they tried again. so i cleaned them
out again, and this time, yes, i wiped it down with raid and
left a little damp in there. but it's a lamp and yeah. so
far it seems to be holding; exterminator has been called.
waiting. worrying they'll pull some crap like move right in
while i'm asleep tuesday 2am and not lucky enough to be
there to notice it like the last two times -- on a weekend,
up later, etc


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2022-06-20 06:26 [#02619350]
Points: 18887 Status: Addict | Followup to Hyperflake: #02619343



yes i was referencing this. it sounds like "heat" to me,
but, well, you heat-ed, i must night


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2022-06-20 06:32 [#02619351]
Points: 18887 Status: Addict



i think nothing of killing individual ants that have marched
into my home. i step over them on the sidewalk. i figure
this is about right

i feel like an ant colony is kind of like a two-dimensional
animal. the scouts they send out represent the snout, the
ears. neural wiring laid down in chemical trails. killing a
few ants is just a flesh wound to the larger beast. but if
there's no other way to stop them from trying i suppose i
would send hugh back to the borg colony with a poison
feedback loop

i figure the proper answer is for someone who knows ants in
a bit more detail to say "oh, i bet they're getting in over
here" and then "let's seal it up out here and then also the
ceiling" and then "let's spray a perimeter around the house"
and then "call me if they come back" and ideally they
won't.

i just hope guy can get over here soon(ish)


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2022-06-20 07:48 [#02619357]
Points: 6744 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



now thinking about it, heat rhymes with feet.
feel like it sounds more like at night tho


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2022-06-20 07:53 [#02619358]
Points: 6744 Status: Regular | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02619351 | Show recordbag



sometimes there just seems to be no other way than killing a
few to prevent a larger death toll.


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2022-06-20 15:19 [#02619372]
Points: 30288 Status: Regular | Followup to ijonspeches: #02619357



Its like the blue gold/white dress thing


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2022-06-20 15:24 [#02619373]
Points: 30288 Status: Regular



its really puzzling to me cos it sounds absolutely not even
remotely like night to my ears, perception is weird!

LAZY_TITLE

I hear green needle


 

offline hevquip from megagram dusk sect (United States) on 2022-06-20 20:33 [#02619374]
Points: 3274 Status: Lurker



you dumbass you're killing ants when you could be charging
them rent instead and then using that money to subsidize
your own


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2022-06-21 07:46 [#02619375]
Points: 6744 Status: Regular | Followup to hevquip: #02619374 | Show recordbag



too much paperwork!


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2022-06-23 05:48 [#02619391]
Points: 18887 Status: Addict



so only after they put the "kill the colony" poison down
(alright, fine, no other viable options were presented) do
they tell me this takes a month. like, yes, you're
going to have 40 ants all over your kitchen for three weeks,
try not to kill them or clean up the dead ones.

and if i get actively nasty and/or suicidal in the next few
weeks, please forgive me.

saying this while i still have a rational mind.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2022-06-23 07:08 [#02619392]
Points: 18887 Status: Addict



would really hit the spot right now if i could punch someone
in the mouth and knock at least a few teeth out.


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2022-06-23 07:55 [#02619394]
Points: 6744 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



you should have eaten them while you still could,
like i did


 


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