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The_Funkmaster
from St. John's (Canada) on 2002-06-09 21:15 [#00257272]
Points: 16280 Status: Lurker
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Mistakes
The mistakes I’ve made linger on, And I sit with the feeling eating away at me. What can I do to fix the wrongs I’ve done? Is there anything? If there is, tell me and I will do it!
I want to speak with you, And try to make you see my point of view. I don’t claim to be right, because I was wrong, But I want you to understand what I was feeling. I wonder if speaking would do any good.
It wasn’t just one loss, but the loss of my whole world. My world was falling apart, and it was dragging me down, And so I decided to batter you with my feelings, And make you feel what I felt… but it wasn’t even your fault!!
I was wrong!!!
It was a huge mistake and I’m sorry, But it’s in the past now, and there is nothing I can do. I need your forgiveness, Because it seems everyone hates me for what I have done. Are you going to hate me forever? I just can’t wait that long!!
By: Jonathan Coish
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marlowe
from Antarctica on 2002-06-09 21:38 [#00257341]
Points: 24578 Status: Lurker
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i won't hate you forever!
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Amonbrune
from Vancouver (Canada) on 2002-06-09 21:39 [#00257345]
Points: 7327 Status: Addict
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thats pretty good man :)
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Jedi Chris
on 2002-06-09 21:47 [#00257355]
Points: 11496 Status: Lurker | Followup to The_Funkmaster: #00257272
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You are very talented Mr Funkmaster - very talented indeed!
Is poetry a hobby of yours?
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roygbivcore
from Joyrex.com, of course! on 2002-06-09 21:54 [#00257365]
Points: 22557 Status: Lurker
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dude, i feel like that right now.
my girlfriend interpreted me not letting my self get my hopes up (because every time i do, they come crashing down hard) as disappointment. this happened about 5 minutes ago, and i feel sick as hell.
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RobE
from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-06-09 21:59 [#00257370]
Points: 1608 Status: Regular | Followup to The_Funkmaster: #00257272
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Good stuff...but it begs the question: what exactly did you do wrong? }:>
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The_Funkmaster
from St. John's (Canada) on 2002-06-09 23:39 [#00257476]
Points: 16280 Status: Lurker
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thank you all very much... I do write poems sometimes, not as much now as I used to though... I wrote that one just before I posted it, as I was feeling inspired... and well, the inspiration I cannot tell you guys about... lets just say it was a bad, stupid thing that happened, and I regret it deeply, and miss the people involved who I haven't talked to in year...
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Ophecks
from Nova Scotia (Canada) on 2002-06-10 00:16 [#00257576]
Points: 19190 Status: Moderator | Show recordbag
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That's some good stuff. I'm going to copy and paste it and pretend it's mine and brag about my mad poetry skillz, dawg!
I write psychotic poems in my head constantly, wacky prose, but I don't write them down. I should... but it feels awkward, you know.
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aron
from saskatoon (Canada) on 2002-06-10 00:31 [#00257591]
Points: 3756 Status: Lurker
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i have to write some poems for a school assignment that's due tomorrow.
none of mine are that good :p
nice work mr funkmastr
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maxx_damage
from La Paz (Bolivia) on 2002-06-10 01:18 [#00257678]
Points: 112 Status: Regular
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i dont like poetry, but that was nice.
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The_Funkmaster
from St. John's (Canada) on 2002-06-10 03:03 [#00257757]
Points: 16280 Status: Lurker | Followup to aron: #00257591
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really, thanks for the great compliments guys... it means a lot...
but aron, all good poetry is from the heart... if you try to write fancy words, and follow rules for lengths and all that the poetry comes out sounding fake and no good in my opinion... just let it flow man, whatever comes to mind, whatever you feel... that's good poetry!! And yes, it sounds lame, but it's true... it's very theraputic as well, getting stuff off your chest!!
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horsefactory
from 💠 (United Kingdom) on 2005-01-12 17:26 [#01455328]
Points: 14867 Status: Regular | Followup to Jedi Chris: #00257355
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Classic.
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deepspace9mm
from filth on 2005-01-12 17:33 [#01455336]
Points: 6846 Status: Addict
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I think i just laughed myself inside-out.
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-01-12 17:36 [#01455339]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator
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ha ha ha!!
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Dannn_
from United Kingdom on 2005-01-12 17:36 [#01455340]
Points: 7877 Status: Lurker
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It feels good to let it out but once its out you should probably burn it.
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-01-12 17:37 [#01455343]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator
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and remember - all good poetry is from the heart...
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DJ Xammax
from not America on 2005-01-12 17:38 [#01455346]
Points: 11512 Status: Lurker
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You couldn't make it up.
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horsefactory
from 💠 (United Kingdom) on 2005-01-12 17:38 [#01455347]
Points: 14867 Status: Regular
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Me too, but now laugh-time is over and I have to wonder what heinous act it was that inspired The_Funkmaster to pen his seminal work "Mistakes"?
And so I decided to batter you with my feelings,
Looking at this line, I think he battered someone (to an inch of their life) with his feelings (a sock with batteries inside).
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epohs
from )C: on 2005-01-12 17:42 [#01455354]
Points: 17620 Status: Lurker
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i wrote a poem once, and i've never been able to forgive myself for that.
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-01-12 17:46 [#01455365]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator
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now laugh-time is over. :*(
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Dannn_
from United Kingdom on 2005-01-12 17:46 [#01455366]
Points: 7877 Status: Lurker
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I think the line should have been
'And so I decided to fill you with my batter'
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epohs
from )C: on 2005-01-12 17:47 [#01455370]
Points: 17620 Status: Lurker
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when poetry is good it can be really good, but when it's bad it's unbearable.
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-01-12 17:47 [#01455372]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator
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And so I decided to make you a platter
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Dannn_
from United Kingdom on 2005-01-12 17:49 [#01455375]
Points: 7877 Status: Lurker
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I'm no literature-man but I'm guessing 'mistakes' represent odorous turds in other people's toilets. Read it through again and it will all make sense.
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horsefactory
from 💠 (United Kingdom) on 2005-01-12 17:51 [#01455376]
Points: 14867 Status: Regular
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It's laugh-time again.
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-01-12 17:52 [#01455377]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator
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laugh-time! :*)
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epohs
from )C: on 2005-01-12 17:54 [#01455384]
Points: 17620 Status: Lurker
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i like laugh-time.
it's almost as awesome as making a nice "mistake" first thing in the morning.
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horsefactory
from 💠 (United Kingdom) on 2005-01-12 17:56 [#01455387]
Points: 14867 Status: Regular
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It gives the final stanza, in which I imagine Coish at his target's house, urgently pleading for forgiveness and access to the bathroom, so much more poignancy.
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deepspace9mm
from filth on 2005-01-12 17:57 [#01455388]
Points: 6846 Status: Addict
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Commence: Sad And Regret time.
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-01-12 19:43 [#01455529]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator
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My Top Three Favourite Bits:
1. I was wrong!!! 2. By: Jonathan Coish 3. Mistakes
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horsefactory
from 💠 (United Kingdom) on 2005-01-12 19:45 [#01455532]
Points: 14867 Status: Regular
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Mine:
3. I just can’t wait that long!! 2. I don’t claim to be right, because I was wrong 1. I was wrong!!!
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-01-12 19:46 [#01455535]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator
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to clarify, the place in the poem is vital to my choices, the tabs, so to say.
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thecurbcreeper
from United States on 2005-01-12 19:48 [#01455539]
Points: 6045 Status: Lurker | Followup to Dannn_: #01455340
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ha! :D
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JivverDicker
from my house on 2005-01-12 19:48 [#01455541]
Points: 12102 Status: Regular
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fuck me sideways! I can't stop laughing..
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-01-12 19:49 [#01455543]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator
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the winner:
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-01-12 19:52 [#01455547]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator
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but the best things are probably the tips on writing poetry.
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horsefactory
from 💠 (United Kingdom) on 2005-01-12 19:54 [#01455553]
Points: 14867 Status: Regular
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just let it flow man
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JivverDicker
from my house on 2005-01-12 19:54 [#01455555]
Points: 12102 Status: Regular | Followup to qrter: #01455547
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but aron, all good poetry is from the heart
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horsefactory
from 💠 (United Kingdom) on 2005-01-12 19:55 [#01455556]
Points: 14867 Status: Regular
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It was Jedi Chris' comment that really started off my laugh-time earlier
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JivverDicker
from my house on 2005-01-12 19:55 [#01455557]
Points: 12102 Status: Regular
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I think I've gone blind now
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-01-12 19:56 [#01455560]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator | Followup to JivverDicker: #01455555
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ha ha!!
oh my that one is good!
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-01-12 19:57 [#01455563]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator | Followup to horsefactory: #01455556
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how did you find it?
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horsefactory
from 💠 (United Kingdom) on 2005-01-12 20:00 [#01455571]
Points: 14867 Status: Regular | Followup to qrter: #01455563
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Just chipping around in the 50,000+s, you know how it is.
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-01-13 19:32 [#01457400]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator
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I just had to read it again.
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SPD
from United States on 2005-01-13 21:09 [#01457532]
Points: 1090 Status: Moderator | Show recordbag
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i don't write poems but the coffee made me write this today:
This pen is very hard to write w/ as the ball is dry. Its giving me quite a finger work out. Soon my fingers will become obsessed w/ going to the gym + admiring their rock hard bodies. They'll end up getting more girlfriends that I do. Maybe if I'm lucky they'll take me along on their dates. I'd hate to have to sever my hand.
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tolstoyed
from the ocean on 2005-01-13 21:10 [#01457533]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator
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oh man, we have some twisted mods aroud here..
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Anus_Presley
on 2005-01-14 07:00 [#01458192]
Points: 23472 Status: Lurker
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I'd like to thank both The_Funkmaster and Jedi Chris forr cheerring me up in what was otherrwise going to be a sad borring day.
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Anus_Presley
on 2005-01-14 07:03 [#01458203]
Points: 23472 Status: Lurker
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I know what you did last last summerr
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dariusgriffin
from cool on 2005-01-14 07:05 [#01458207]
Points: 12390 Status: Regular
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Good poetry!!
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happy cycling
from berlin on 2005-01-19 01:37 [#01466540]
Points: 2786 Status: Regular
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how humiliating -- it's like walking in on someone masturbating.
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