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 (nobody)...and 139 guests Last 5 registered Oplandisks nothingstar N_loop yipe foxtrotromeo Browse members... |
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Members 8025Messages 2613408 Today 0 Topics 127499 |
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The mistakes I’ve made linger on, And I sit with the feeling eating away at me. What can I do to fix the wrongs I’ve done? Is there anything? If there is, tell me and I will do it! I want to speak with you, And try to make you see my point of view. I don’t claim to be right, because I was wrong, But I want you to understand what I was feeling. I wonder if speaking would do any good. It wasn’t just one loss, but the loss of my whole world. My world was falling apart, and it was dragging me down, And so I decided to batter you with my feelings, And make you feel what I felt… but it wasn’t even your fault!! It was a huge mistake and I’m sorry, But it’s in the past now, and there is nothing I can do. I need your forgiveness, Because it seems everyone hates me for what I have done. Are you going to hate me forever? I just can’t wait that long!! |
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i won't hate you forever! |
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thats pretty good man :) |
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You are very talented Mr Funkmaster - very talented indeed! Is poetry a hobby of yours? |
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dude, i feel like that right now. my girlfriend interpreted me not letting my self get my hopes up (because every time i do, they come crashing down hard) as disappointment. this happened about 5 minutes ago, and i feel sick as hell. |
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Good stuff...but it begs the question: what exactly did you do wrong? }:> |
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thank you all very much... I do write poems sometimes, not as much now as I used to though... I wrote that one just before I posted it, as I was feeling inspired... and well, the inspiration I cannot tell you guys about... lets just say it was a bad, stupid thing that happened, and I regret it deeply, and miss the people involved who I haven't talked to in year... |
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That's some good stuff. I'm going to copy and paste it and pretend it's mine and brag about my mad poetry skillz, dawg! I write psychotic poems in my head constantly, wacky prose, but I don't write them down. I should... but it feels awkward, you know. |
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i have to write some poems for a school assignment that's due tomorrow. none of mine are that good :p nice work mr funkmastr |
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i dont like poetry, but that was nice. |
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really, thanks for the great compliments guys... it means a lot... but aron, all good poetry is from the heart... if you try to write fancy words, and follow rules for lengths and all that the poetry comes out sounding fake and no good in my opinion... just let it flow man, whatever comes to mind, whatever you feel... that's good poetry!! And yes, it sounds lame, but it's true... it's very theraputic as well, getting stuff off your chest!! |
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Classic. |
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I think i just laughed myself inside-out. |
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ha ha ha!! |
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It feels good to let it out but once its out you should probably burn it. |
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and remember - all good poetry is from the heart... |
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You couldn't make it up. |
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Me too, but now laugh-time is over and I have to wonder what heinous act it was that inspired The_Funkmaster to pen his seminal work "Mistakes"? And so I decided to batter you with my feelings, Looking at this line, I think he battered someone (to an inch of their life) with his feelings (a sock with batteries inside). |
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i wrote a poem once, and i've never been able to forgive myself for that. |
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now laugh-time is over. :*( |
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I think the line should have been 'And so I decided to fill you with my batter' |
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when poetry is good it can be really good, but when it's bad it's unbearable. |
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And so I decided to make you a platter |
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I'm no literature-man but I'm guessing 'mistakes' represent odorous turds in other people's toilets. Read it through again and it will all make sense. |
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It's laugh-time again. |
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laugh-time! :*) |
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i like laugh-time. it's almost as awesome as making a nice "mistake" first thing in the morning. |
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It gives the final stanza, in which I imagine Coish at his target's house, urgently pleading for forgiveness and access to the bathroom, so much more poignancy. |
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Commence: Sad And Regret time. |
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My Top Three Favourite Bits: 1. I was wrong!!! 2. By: Jonathan Coish 3. Mistakes |
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Mine: 3. I just can’t wait that long!! 2. I don’t claim to be right, because I was wrong 1. I was wrong!!! |
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to clarify, the place in the poem is vital to my choices, the tabs, so to say. |
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ha! :D |
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fuck me sideways! I can't stop laughing.. |
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the winner: |
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but the best things are probably the tips on writing poetry. |
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just let it flow man |
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but aron, all good poetry is from the heart |
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It was Jedi Chris' comment that really started off my laugh-time earlier |
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I think I've gone blind now |
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ha ha!! oh my that one is good! |
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how did you find it? |
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Just chipping around in the 50,000+s, you know how it is. |
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I just had to read it again. |
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i don't write poems but the coffee made me write this today: This pen is very hard to write w/ as the ball is dry. Its giving me quite a finger work out. Soon my fingers will become obsessed w/ going to the gym + admiring their rock hard bodies. They'll end up getting more girlfriends that I do. Maybe if I'm lucky they'll take me along on their dates. I'd hate to have to sever my hand. |
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oh man, we have some twisted mods aroud here.. |
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I'd like to thank both The_Funkmaster and Jedi Chris forr cheerring me up in what was otherrwise going to be a sad borring day. |
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I know what you did last last summerr |
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Good poetry!! |
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how humiliating -- it's like walking in on someone masturbating. |
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