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 Now online (2)big Roger Wilco ...and 234 guests Last 5 registered Oplandisks nothingstar N_loop yipe foxtrotromeo Browse members... |
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I decided to move from my old college, which I commuted to from home, into a new college that my friends were going to. I figured getting to live with my friends would be a good change in environment that I direly needed. It was probably a good theory, but instead I've been thrust into a people-zoo during rutting season. As a little bit of background, I have really inconsiderate friends. That is not to say I don’t like them, but it might be suggesting they don’t like me. We have been a “trio” for many many years, but of late (last year or so) they’ve been a bit distant. Example: They traveled around together this summer without inviting me…or telling me. In that time I was bored at home because I decided to take the summer off from working so I could spend some time with them. Ha Ha. So, as I inferred, they also didn’t tell me they signed up for a dorm room. So needless to say, they had no sympathy or remorse. They didn’t even say too-bad-for-you. The subject was merely dismissed. So this year I’ve been bouncing around to different dorms, which have contained a variety of characters, none of which I could bear. My last one was a crack fiend and yuppy (odd combination I know)…this one seems ok except he has parties EVERY day…not just weekends. He let one of his drunken friends sleep in my bed and use my expensive illustration board as a coaster. He ended up vomiting in my bed, pissing himself, and spilling his beer on my art supplies. This type of stuff is an every day thing. I’m just guessing, but I know those two friends of mine went home without saying a word to me today. This belongs in a journal with bad poetry, sorry |
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that's not very good, scuppers. :( |
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i might suspect that those two friends of yours might be boning and don't want to share, i might suspect. |
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Blow them off the face of the earth with hip hop beats and lyrical blasting. (I am in a somewhat similar situation, so I can't really offer advice. :/) |
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Sorry to hear it little lee. I hope things work out for you. |
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It may be your negativity that is causing a lot of the problems here. You can be you own worse enemy and if you are giving off a depressing vibe, no one wants to spend time with you. Do someting fun, enjoy yourself. Go away for the weekend and invite them. Have some fun! |
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rub one out. thats sound advice. thats what epohs would say |
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well, I've confirmed my suspicions; they did in fact go home without me. 010101 - you're right virginpusher - too late |
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Don't take it to heart. They probably don't mean to be unkind/inconsiderate/hurt your feelings. Talk to them about it over a pint and sort something out. |
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oh, I forgot to mention that my first roommate smelled really bad. Like, really really bad, like: mothballs-mixed-with-McDonalds,-pizza,-bag of semen,-pickle juice,-piss,-vomit,-etc bad |
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Living with people you hate, or who repulse you is an important aspect of the whole, "going away to university" experience and part of growing up. Trust me, once you've graduated, you'll look back on it and laugh and exchange stories with your friends about it. |
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Where do you live? |
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I've heard this, that semen has a smell. but i'll be damned if i can smell it. i always heard that it smells of bleach or something. but somehow, i'm unable to detect even the slightest odor. we had a tree in our front yard years ago. everyone said it smelled like spunk. i could not smell that either. |
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well, I've confirmed my suspicions; they did in fact go home without me. I've civilly discussed it before with them, but I'm not a charming, affable speaker, and that's a fact. Anyway, discussion of any kind regarding the status of our relationship never ends well, it usually just makes us more distant. It’s really impossible to convey here, but suffice it to say I’m in a pickle. ceri - I've already starting exchanging stories (as you can see), I'm sure I will have plenty more too. 010101 - Maine (of the USA) |
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weird, that's sort of like how I can't taste pepper maybe |
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maybe we are genetic anomalies. maybe not being able to smell stuff is like a super mutant ability. you should brag to your friends about it. or find a way to turn your mutant power against them. |
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sorry to hear that scup. sometimes shit happens and you really have to just roll with it. if your friends are being so crappy to you, why don't you try telling them how you feel? some people are so stupid that they don't realize when they truly hurt someone - they may never know unless you tell them. also, about the guy puking on your art supplies, and i'm not trying to be a narc but FUCK that. next time that happens let your roommate know where your place is and where yours is, and tell them to stay the fuck out. and if they don't, let someone know who could fix it. yes, that's tattling, but it will keep people out of your expensive art supplies. and yes, i know they are expensive because i had art studies for a while. and plus, consider finding new friends, or a counselor. i think it would help you immensely if you talked to someone face-to-face about what is bothering you. |
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"and plus, consider finding new friends, or a counselor. i think it would help you immensely if you talked to someone face-to-face about what is bothering you. " Agreed. |
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evolume - I brag about it constantly oddioblender - I think they just don't care enough to express realization. A counselor might be good except it would have to be a very good counselor, which is hard to come by so I've heard...and I'm choosy. I'm also really fumbly and awkward when I talk to anyone, especially new people |
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I think you know my thoughts on this, but incase you forgot let me re-emphasize that your 'friends' might have been your friends in the past, but they haven't been for quite some time. I can't believe you followed them to college. All I can say is to get out of that situation, don't even bother saying goodbye. Find a path that you really like and study the hell out of it at a decent college, even if you don't know anyone there. If there isn't a subject you're interested in, then don't go to school till you figure out what it is, otherwise you are just wasting money. I hope this helped, I'm about as eloquent a speaker as you. |
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yeah, I had a good reason to follow though, it didn't work out the way I was expecting though. |
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by "good" I mean "good-ish" or "stupid" |
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Try getting in or starting a club for something you enjoy doing. Then maybeyou'll find some good people to room with. |
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agreed. |
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sorry for the one word post but honestly that is exactly what I was about to type. |
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I'm also really fumbly and awkward when I talk to anyone, especially new people Something tells me a counselor would know what to do and how to get the most out of fumbly awkward people. And your friends suck. You're probably a bit of a miser, but still. I really liked weatheredstoner's post, especially the very true part about not wasting money, although I don't see what that has to do with the topic. |
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I threw it in there for good measure because I wasted time and money at a college that I didn't want to be at. I figure it's something that would come up for Scup because everything he's describing in this thread happened to me at some point in the past. |
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Scup lad, these people aren't friends. You are trying to forge a close relationship with people who quite obviously don't want to reciprocate the gesture. Forget them. They are just acquaintances, nothing more than people you know, treat them as such. I am not even implying these are necessarily bad people, they just aren't your friends. Be positive and take control of your life. Be a leader, you have always came across to me as quite unconfident and given that you are one of the most articulate people on the board it makes me think you are more than capable of turning yourself around. You may never find anyone who is exactly like you. I know I haven't found anyone exactly like me, but my 'close friends' (all quite recent friends from when I was 22+) are people I trust dispite the fact they have, in my eyes, some major flaws of character. |
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er, make new friends i guess. you know those two suck and you shouldnt blame yourself. |
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ai, e. beat me and thinks the same way as me :) |
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sounds like you have spent a lot of time smelling spunk. |
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It passes by his nose on the way down his throat. |
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I guess he has had do desensitise himself to the smell so as not to retch each and every time he finishes with a customer. |
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I guess his two for one offer helped him in that sense. |
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Your mates don't sound like mates at all. Have some self respect and tell them to fuck off. You can meet new people. |
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"I am not even implying these are necessarily bad people, they just aren't your friends." That's the kicker right there. The problem is, I have met about 5 people in the span of my life who I liked enough to attempt the forging of a friendship with. After I get to know most people I end up hating them or loving them, in a fairly extreme way. These two people are really the best I've found so far, so it's a bit difficult to say "fuck you, bye" as you might imagine. But I have resolved to do just that, in so many words. |
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I've smelled the spunk tree before. Does it grow yellow pollen things that hang down? |
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maybe you should start building up a network of aquintances, or friends that you like and get on with, but don't want to get too close to or whatever. i mean yeah they might not be shallow and engage in pointless small talk etc.. but it will keep you socially active. i've found this since most of my good mates have moved away from where i live, and i've only got 3 people now who i would actually call mates. i know a lot of people, mainly through my job, working in the busiest pub for miles around, and whilst i will drink with them and go on nights out with them, i wouldn't class them as real friends. |
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"might not = might be" |
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That's kind of a fucked up situation. Everyone need people to hang out with, to call "friends", and for them to do the same, but you can't just be at their disposal and put up with their shitiness just because you don't have many other friends. They probably know this and it is why they act assholish to you, because they think that no matter how inconsiderate they are, you'll come crawling back because you have no alternative. I don't really know exactly how to combat this, as I've often been in similar situations. You just have to act confident to new people, and make it clear that you want to be their friends if you do because many people mistake shyness as haughtiness or aloofness. You probably need at first to befriend people who you ideally would not hang out with, in order to meet more people and find a few that you can identify with more. Also, as depressing as it may seem, most people suppress some part of their personality around other people in order to fit in. In some instances it's a good thing, like an asshole suppressing their assholishness, but most times it is just a person's certain uniqueness or 'abnormal' personality trait that they are suppressing. But sometimes it is necessary for someone to do this to be able to enter some sort of social network, as it is never easy for anyone to instantly 'jump' into a group of friends who will accept them, especially if the person comes off as not being fully interested in friendship.. even if they act that way as some sort of defence mechanism against being rejected. ...I don't know where the hell I'm going with this. I'll shut my flapping trap. |
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