I need your advice........! | xltronic messageboard
 
You are not logged in!

F.A.Q
Log in

Register
  
 
  
 
(nobody)
...and 461 guests

Last 5 registered
Oplandisks
nothingstar
N_loop
yipe
foxtrotromeo

Browse members...
  
 
Members 8025
Messages 2614114
Today 0
Topics 127542
  
 
Messageboard index
I need your advice........!
 

offline manicminer from Paris (France) on 2003-07-08 04:40 [#00770480]
Points: 1423 Status: Lurker



Sorry man, this is another soppy "love-thread".....

I've been living in Lithuania now for 7 months, and met this
girl a couple of months back. We've been dating, etc (!),
pretty seriously ever since. I like her loads, man. She's
sort of my ideal woman.

Thing is, I have to leave here in less than two months and
return to the UK (I won't go into my reasons why, but I do
HAVE to, there's no way I will be able to stay here beyond
the middle/end of August).

I have been trying to persuade her that she should come with
me. She has just finished her degree (in English language)
and she has nothing much to do now. She is seriously
considering it. However, British immigration policy is
rather harsh on people from Central and Eastern Europe, and
she seems to think that she won't be able to come over very
easily at all.

I really don't want to leave her behind, but I can't stay
here. She HAS to come with me! But she might not be able
to! FUCK! And in my experience, long distance
relationships just don't work. If she stays here, we'd
hardly ever see each other because it's really expensive to
travel between the UK and Lithuania by plane, and it takes
almost three solid days travelling by coach.

What am I going to do? Anyone else been in a similar
situation? Frigging hell.


 

offline xceque on 2003-07-08 04:45 [#00770486]
Points: 5888 Status: Moderator | Show recordbag



I'd say that the first step is to find out exactly what the
processes and policies are towards immigration specific to
your situation. Get all the legal details you can and see
how you can deal with each of them. Big problems are
always easiest to cope with if you break them down
into little problems and approach each of them in a relaxed
manner, without panic.


 

offline giginger from Milky Beans (United Kingdom) on 2003-07-08 04:45 [#00770487]
Points: 26326 Status: Lurker | Show recordbag



Tell her to enter illegally. The government will give her a
shit load of money too and you can live like Phat cats. I'm
serious. At least she has a knowledge of English. Failing
that you come over first and search for jobs for her.


 

offline cirrius logic on 2003-07-08 04:45 [#00770488]
Points: 155 Status: Lurker



If she wants to come with you then look into the issue of
living in the UK.

If you both really want to be in the UK and it is that hard
to for her to gain entry to the uk, consider marriage.


 

offline JAroen from the pineal gland on 2003-07-08 04:46 [#00770489]
Points: 16065 Status: Regular



if you both are decent people, and dont look like a shabby
immigrant or something.. (no offence) you've got a nice
chance theyll let her in

you'd better check the british ambassy in the country you
live now... they might help you


 

offline Peloton from London (United Kingdom) on 2003-07-08 04:47 [#00770490]
Points: 651 Status: Lurker



I'd start by checking with the British consulate/embassy in
Vilnius. There must be some sort of visa application
process?

Once you get her here (if you can get her here 'course),
marry her.

It'll probably be much more difficult than that though.

Alternatively, sew up her eyes and lips. Seems to be the
latest craze among immigrants wanting to stay here.


 

offline manicminer from Paris (France) on 2003-07-08 04:54 [#00770498]
Points: 1423 Status: Lurker



Thanks for the advice man.

Hmmm....... marriage? I don't think I could do that, man!
We haven't known each other for very long. I don't want to
do anything totally rash.

Yes, we should talk to the British Embassy in Vilnius.

Does anybody here have any prior experience/knowledge of
anything like this? i.e. have you ever worked/lived in the
UK legally/illegally as a foreign immigrant? Or do you know
anyone who has?

As Giginger pointed out, she DOES have a degree in English.
In fact, she speaks the best English out of any foreign
non-native speaker I've ever met.

I was thinking she could train to be a teacher in the UK,
because I know the government now gives you 6 grand to
train. However, a non-EU national doesn't get the grant and
in fact has to pay over 7 grand for the training.
Wanky-wank-wank-wank.

Are there any millionaires here who fancy giving me a
shitload of cash just so that I can bring a girl back to the
UK with me? :)


 

offline giginger from Milky Beans (United Kingdom) on 2003-07-08 04:54 [#00770499]
Points: 26326 Status: Lurker | Followup to manicminer: #00770498 | Show recordbag



That teacher angle would work a treat mate.


 

offline Jedi Chris on 2003-07-08 04:56 [#00770503]
Points: 11496 Status: Lurker | Followup to manicminer: #00770498



If I win the lottery on Saturday, its a done deal!

:D


 

offline giginger from Milky Beans (United Kingdom) on 2003-07-08 04:58 [#00770506]
Points: 26326 Status: Lurker | Followup to Jedi Chris: #00770503 | Show recordbag



Can I have a laptop please?


 

offline Jedi Chris on 2003-07-08 05:00 [#00770508]
Points: 11496 Status: Lurker | Followup to giginger: #00770506



For you Mr Giginger....anything!


 

offline Jedi Chris on 2003-07-08 05:01 [#00770510]
Points: 11496 Status: Lurker | Followup to giginger: #00770506



This is where I half expect from you a topic to appear
entitled "If Jedi Chris wins the lottery what do you want
him to buy you?"


hehhehe


 

offline xceque on 2003-07-08 05:02 [#00770514]
Points: 5888 Status: Moderator | Show recordbag



I know a couple who moved to the UK from different
countries, her from Poland and him from Syria and because of
that they've spent years applying for certificates and visas
and whatnot. They've raised a family in the time it's taken
for all the applications, interviews and assorted paperwork
to run it's course. And all through that time there was
constant worries of deportation if any applications were
refused.

I doubt that a Lithuanian would have anywhere near as much
trouble but the best thing to do would be to enquire what
your options are from someone who's job it is to provide
such details. The aforementioned embassy would be the place
to start asking.


 

offline JAroen from the pineal gland on 2003-07-08 05:04 [#00770517]
Points: 16065 Status: Regular | Followup to Jedi Chris: #00770510



hah.. now that would be something ey?


 

offline jiggalo bob on 2003-07-08 05:09 [#00770526]
Points: 52 Status: Regular



tie her up and gag her and put her in ur suitcase. then
she'll be in the uk and realise what a good decision she
made coming over!


 

offline giginger from Milky Beans (United Kingdom) on 2003-07-08 05:44 [#00770556]
Points: 26326 Status: Lurker | Followup to Jedi Chris: #00770508 | Show recordbag



Bless :D Back at ya baby.


 

offline Anus_Presley on 2003-07-08 05:47 [#00770558]
Points: 23472 Status: Lurker



Sorry man, this is another soppy "love-thread".....

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW


 

offline manicminer from Paris (France) on 2003-07-09 06:15 [#00771733]
Points: 1423 Status: Lurker



Thanks for the advice chaps.

I'll email the embassy people as soon as I find the time.
I'm sure there must be some way of getting it sorted. Got
to be positive!

Jiggalo Bob's idea is a good un, might try it actually.



 

offline pomme de terre from obscure body in the SK System on 2003-07-09 06:43 [#00771742]
Points: 11941 Status: Moderator | Show recordbag



i agree with xceque.. take some time to do some research..
you're obviously very serious about everything and have
strong feelings for this girl, which means anything really
can become a reality as long as you work at it.

*positivity
*corrective thinking
*proactivity

good luck mate! please give us an update when you can..


 

offline manicminer from Paris (France) on 2003-07-09 08:13 [#00771811]
Points: 1423 Status: Lurker | Followup to pomme de terre: #00771742



Thanks man.

I'm positive that she could come to the UK with me if we
just follow the correct procedures, etc. She's something of
a pessimist though....... so, I'm trying to make her think
positively!

I'll update on the situation if/when anything
happens........! :/


 

offline manicminer from Paris (France) on 2003-08-01 05:38 [#00803536]
Points: 1423 Status: Lurker



Oh man......

Still haven't sorted this little problemette out! I'm
trying though.....

Giginger, what's this about the UK government handing out
cash to immigrants?! Is it really that easy?


 

offline manicminer from Paris (France) on 2003-10-09 06:18 [#00895666]
Points: 1423 Status: Lurker



OK man,

Sorry that I only seem to post on here nowadays in a
desperate attempt for advice..... :)

This situation is STILL getting to me! I've been back in
the UK for six weeks now (more's the pity) and my girlfriend
is coming here VERY soon. I have got all the visitor's visa
business sorted out.

When she gets here, she wants to find work. I can just
about afford to support her and am quite happy and willing
to do so. But she won't let me. I think she feels too
guilty about being a burden, and maybe she's also worried
about being bored sitting around all day waiting whilst I
work/study.

Problem is, Lithuania only joins the EU on the 1st May. On
that date Britain is allowing the people from the new EU
member states to work here immediately.

In the meantime, she can't legally work here. I've checked
it all out with the Home Office, and the only thing she can
do is to study here and then get a student's visa. However,
studying as a non-EU national here is prohibitively
expensive, so that's really out of the question.

An employer can only get a work permit for her if they can
prove that they can't get an EU person in the job, and I
really can't see an employer going to all that trouble just
to do me and my girlfriend a favour.

I have asked in LOADS of places (bars, cafes, restaurants,
shops) if they would take someone on cash-in-hand, and they
have ALL said no, that they only employ people legally, i.e.
through the books.

So, I was wondering, does anyone have any advice? Anyone
been in the same boat? Any ideas of how to find "cash in
hand work"?

No funny comments about "prositution" please, I've heard it
all before! :P

And, before it's suggested again, I'd gladly marry her but I
really don't think she would want to take such a drastic
step (I have kind of half-suggested it to her).

HELP!!!!!! I need her to stay with me for the next year
while I study. I can't go back to Lithuania until I finish
at the end of next summer, and I really want her here


 

offline manicminer from Paris (France) on 2003-10-09 06:19 [#00895667]
Points: 1423 Status: Lurker



with me. HELP!


 

offline Junktion from Northern Jutland (Denmark) on 2003-10-09 06:22 [#00895671]
Points: 9713 Status: Lurker | Followup to manicminer: #00895667



shit...she's moving to UK for you...she's willing to work,
and she hates being a burden...FUCK MAN YOUR LUCKY AS HELL

keep her outta drugs and bad socialization and she'll be
fine


 

offline manicminer from Paris (France) on 2003-10-09 06:25 [#00895678]
Points: 1423 Status: Lurker | Followup to Junktion: #00895671



Well, when you put it like that, it does make me feel
lucky...... :)

But I am worried that she's just going to come here and then
decide to leave if she doesn't find a job. I can't stand
the idea of being with her again, only to have it cruelly
ripped away from me.

Maybe I am thinking too far ahead and should just enjoy it
while it lasts and see how things turn out?

Advice, anyone, please :)


 

offline Junktion from Northern Jutland (Denmark) on 2003-10-09 06:30 [#00895681]
Points: 9713 Status: Lurker | Followup to manicminer: #00895678



enjoy it while it lasts...remember that some bastards out
there *cough* are without any girlfriend, often because they
used too much time thinking about the relationsship than the
girl...look...just take the ride...maybe it'll end up good,
maybe bad...who cares...it's better than noone at all


 

offline manicminer from Paris (France) on 2003-10-09 06:33 [#00895682]
Points: 1423 Status: Lurker | Followup to Junktion: #00895681



I'm quite sure you're right. I'll try to enjoy it while it
lasts I guess. As you say, there's no telling which way it
will go; good or bad.

But it would be so helpful if I could find her a job. I
really can't seem to find anything at all :(


 

offline manicminer from Paris (France) on 2003-10-09 06:34 [#00895684]
Points: 1423 Status: Lurker | Followup to Junktion: #00895681



By the way Junktion, while I was in Lithuania I met quite a
lot of Danish people and, no kidding, I found them to be the
friendliest people I've ever met! It's made me really want
to visit the place. Without exception, every Dane I met was
really, really nice, friendly and unpretentious. Is this a
national trait?


 

offline Junktion from Northern Jutland (Denmark) on 2003-10-09 06:36 [#00895687]
Points: 9713 Status: Lurker | Followup to manicminer: #00895684



yeah...we are bastards in our own country though, but
outside we are helpful ;)

But sure..if you want to visit Denmark, you should visit
Aalborg instead of Copenhagen. It's a more social place (and
where I live).


 

offline nlogax from oh, you must be the brains (Norway) on 2003-10-09 06:37 [#00895688]
Points: 4653 Status: Regular



get married
problem solved


 

offline manicminer from Paris (France) on 2003-10-09 06:37 [#00895689]
Points: 1423 Status: Lurker



Cool....... I reckon I'll definitely try to get out to
Denmark at some point in the future :)


 

offline Junktion from Northern Jutland (Denmark) on 2003-10-09 07:28 [#00895745]
Points: 9713 Status: Lurker | Followup to manicminer: #00895689



year...it's just over seas...if you take a boat to
Frederikshavn, there only a ~30 minute traintrip to Aalborg


 


Messageboard index