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 Now online (1)dariusgriffin ...and 185 guests Last 5 registered Oplandisks nothingstar N_loop yipe foxtrotromeo Browse members... |
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Members 8025Messages 2613863 Today 3 Topics 127525 |
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if i start today what do i have to do to become the pope |
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if i gave it my all and really believe nothing is impossible u know |
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have an invisible friend and wear a funny hat |
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is already tha pope silly |
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Just send your instagram/twitter links to pope-recruitment.com. If successful you will be issued a full PopedIn page to compete in next years Vatican - World's got Pope show. |
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high school, i founded my own religion ~ the holy church of unified borkism. it started during a discussion walking back from gym class with a friend; i declared i wanted to found a religion so i could donate all my worldly possessions and income to it (for tax purposes). he asked what my religion would be based on, and the first thing that came to mind was the swedish chef (bork bork bork). i took the idea and ran with it. i registered a ; built a web site. printed up flyers and handed them out to people at school. had a great time declaring anyone who wanted to be in to be bishops, popes, whatever. we only had one "official jesus" but there were some unofficial ones too, and multiple popes. years later, classmates found me on facebook to let me know borkism had begun to show up in textbooks about "alternative religions": A slightly more generous assessment is offered by David Chidester in his pioneering academic study of invented religions, alternative spiritualities and secular phenomena that have acquired religions overtones, such as Coca Cola, rock 'n' roll, and baseball. He acknowledges the dilemma that the Discordian challenge presents to the scholar of religion; if Discordianism is not a 'real religion', what type of criteria might be employed to validate a reputable definition of 'real religion'? He identifies the Church of the SubGenius with other Discordian offshoots (including the Illuminated Knights of Otis and the 'Holy Church of Unified Borksm, devoted to the Swedish "Muppet chef extroadinaire", the Borkian lord an savior')" it is strange to see stuff i wrote in high school quoted by someone who is quoting someone else who quoted me; my stupid joke of a religion is in multiple books and papers now. irony is, i hadn't even heard of discordianism at the time! bottom line: if you want to be pope, just declare yourself pope |
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oh cool it's on |
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As an atheist, I'm staying out of such matters. |
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can god write a rock so heavy, even He cannot play it? not sure if i came up with that before or after borkism, but it was one of my favorite lines to use on the street preachers trying to convert people during lunch. you could see them prepping an answer for a debate question they'd already heard (and refuted) a dozen times... then, it would register that this was something else, something weirder. the expression on their face would change; you could literally see the gears grind to a halt, for a moment. then, usually, they'd laugh, if they were alright. some of 'em weren't, and were all, "son, you think this is a joke? you're going to hell!" "i can't go to hell," i'd reply. "i'm the pope of the holy church of unified borkism." then on to some shades of purple that warrant a mention in the colors thred |
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anyways, to answer the OP, to be the catholic pope, you need to all of those people on board, including the purple-skulled old crabs who descend into "you're going to hell" as soon as the discussion is no longer on their terms. as such, i'd recommend you give up now (for the sake of both sides). |
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have you read the man? i was really into it a while back, my copy is full of scribbled notes and arcane doodles now. i used to turn it upside down and go into a weird trance where i'd recite it in song form. nutty schizo biz. discordianism is probably the only religion i still have any kind of allegiance to though, however tenuous |
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only seen bits of it. the malacylpse the younger screed about capital-t truth, little-t truth, well, someone posted it here, i dunno, 2014? that really resonated with me. i really ought to sit down and read it in a sense, i already have the flavor, though. read a great number of r. a. wilson's books. |
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thanks guys for the advice btw can the pope get laid also epicmegatrax i read your post -not the whole thing obviously your last post- and i want to say to all the young xltronic readers who admire to be the next pope don’t be discouraged by this epicmegatrax guy he lives in his mother’s basement |
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> btw can the pope get laid |
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“Many spoke of an unspoken code of the “closet”, with one rule of thumb being that the more homophobic a cleric was, the more likely he was to be gay.” reminds me of someone here who’s not fond of gay muppets. seems like the vatican is having gay orgies all day! count me in! |
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u have to admit it'd be pretty sweet if you were his alt |
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i still might be and l love me some gay action |
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are you ready to be tied to a spinning pink crucifix covered in Vaseline while relax by Frankie goes to Hollywood is sung by a naked choir of monks |
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yes i am ready *intense shivering* |
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the safe phrase is "jumping Jehoshaphat" |
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be old, know latin, have and invisible friend and a funny hat and a propensity for overlooking criminal behaviour |
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Gets Stuck For 25 Minutes. The Vatican did not clarify whether the pope was alone in the malfunctioning elevator, or if any of his aides were by his side when Francis was stuck (inside of them [in the elevator]) |
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The Pope Walks Into An Elevator. He Gets Stuck For 25 Minutes. The Pope Walks Into An Elevator. He Gets Stuck For 25 Minutes. The Pope Walks Into An Elevator. He Gets Stuck For 25 Minutes. "Pope Francis Gets Stuck In An Elevator For 25 Minutes" sounds like a good name for an EP on bandcramp |
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i'd be a better pope than that old fart i deserve it more than he does |
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if i were the pope and i got stuck on an elevator when they finally rescued me they'd find me making out with a large handsome gentleman |
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which would clearly not b u (o!~ burn) |
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even the pope needs a chest -hairy- he can rest his head on epic |
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just cause you're the pope doesn't mean u part with your feelings |
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just 'cos you pooped in the vatican don't mean u pope |
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epicmegatrax this is serious biznezz |
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