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What're "they", demons? Re: the good cop, bad cop- I agree with that idea. I think white magic is just a good cop routine. Yes, I know, I'm a right wing Christian, feed me to the lions, he he he. |
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"they" are demons, though i dont usually use that word. there is no description for them. "fallen angels" is the standard term, though i find it VERY hard to believe they ever were. i have, unfortunately, been in their direct presence before. i can't, or wont, even explain what i mean, because of the sheer terror it reminds me of. no i am not insane. no, i have never had mental problems. no, i dont do drugs. im telling you guys straight up, because i love all people, there is nothing good about messin with that crap. only bad will come of it. true evil, until you are in it's very presence, is somewhat a mystery. you just couldnt possibly even imagine it. stephen king cant just make it up and write a book about it. its like seeing someone get shot on tv, then seeing it for real. it will never leave you. it is burned in my mind. as cheesy as it may sound to some, i cling desperately to my Lord. he is my only protection from those THINGS. |
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you sound a lot like my bf there.. |
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well, then i would say that your boyfriend has a heads-up on most people in this world. if he has unfortunately been "near" (no other words fit right) these horrible HORRIBLE monstrosities, i feel sympathy and empathy for him. it is amazing how clearly one sees the world and his surrounding environment when he is faced with the abyss. the very real twilight zone. time stops. your heart stops. the nightmare begins. there are so few words for it, and i SO do not want to talk about this... but i think i should, if only in the hope that maybe just one person on here will take something from what i am saying. |
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Yes, please share, however distressing it might be. It'd be worth it if one person took notice... |
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i believe this is the very first time that anyone on this board has ENCOURAGED me to talk about anything even remotely christian... thank you very much, just your eagerness to hear has made me very happy. well, it is like this... i am 23, going to be 24 soon... i was 18 at the time this all happened. let me tell you what i was like. i was alot like someone liek skyfarmer. i was a snotty jerk who thought i was VERY funny. i was cynical and did alot of drugs. i was down with hitting it to whatever girl i could get next to. i was unhappy. i hated myself. i had nothing to live for. i obsessed over my own death. i needed something to fill this void. i was bored. i smoked way too much weed and was way too apathetic. now, as unclear as my mind was THEN, i am/have been able to sort those things out NOW. what i am saying is, i might have been hazy and kinda nuts then, but i can recognize what is/was B.S. about those times now that im sober-minded. i heard about a haunted house near where i lived. |
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Magick does not have a good cop/bad cop routine - anyone who believes that is ignorant of the real purpose of magick. Those who try to use it for their own selfish means, will fuck up -- but don't try to blame it on magick--they bring it upon themselves. |
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wow, i just realised it sounds liek i totally dissed sky.... im sorry, i DO liek the guy, even if he IS kinda a punk. |
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anyway, as i was saying... we had heard about this haunted house and thought it would be cool to go check it out late at night. we figured it was a fake anyway, we had heard about another house nearby and figured it was a similar hoax. we got our flashlights and headed there. when we got there and parked, i was sitting in the right front passenger seat. i opened my door and looked out. i closed the door. i turned to my friend driving and said "look out your door and tell me what you see". he did, and said "oh wow, thats weird... theres a deer leg by my front and back tires. he had parked perfectly inside a square of 4 severed deer legs. we found the torso later in a shed leading to the house. |
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so, ok... we were a little freaked. i mean, that doesnt happen everyday. but things got alot weirder alot quicker. as soon as we stepped up to the property, it got REALLY dark. it was already night. it was about 10pm. but it got DARK. fast. it was as though we stepped into another world. this clearing that led to the house. somehow the house looked different now. it had at least 10 windows around it. all were glass-less, no curtains, no drapes. just blackness, like eyes staring back at me. let me remind you, we went into it thinking it was a hoax, we were laughing the whole way there. |
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it felt to me like i had stepped into hell. i recently read the book "night" by elie weisel... and for anyone who has read it, it is a first-hand account of the camps auschwitz and birnau in WWII. the way he described these places, it reminded me of this experience (not to cheapen his experiences there). 6 years later, and i am reminded of this. the air was twisted. i felt eyes touching me. a very clostrophobic sense of panic. i told my friends they would have to go in alone. i would not go in there. |
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so they all went in (3 of them, 1 stayed out with me). it seemed liek forever. we investigated this thing out back. it looked liek a heavily rusted trailer, to be hitched to an old-school truck or something. in this burned-out cab, was a rocking chair in excellent condition. it was turned towards the house. they were inside doing oujia board or something liek that. i yelled to my friend mike inside. he appeared in the upstairs window. i asked where he was, he said he was in the second-story "bedroom" (if you could call it that). he seemed not so "ha,ha". he said i really should go in there. i said no thanks. i asked him to go to the room where he thought this chair looked liek it was facing. he said hold on a second. he re-appeared in the attic window. i asked, "is that where it looks like its faced?" he said yeah... and then... i swear to you i could, WOULD never make this up... i saw something behind him. it wasnt liek seeing another person, but there was DEFINATELY something there. he knew it, too. he got very stiff for a second and then disappeared form the window. in a few second he was outside with us. we talked aggitatedly for 10 minutes or so about our feelings about what is going on here. |
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this thing, that i saw... it was impossible... it was everything i now envision evil to be; ultimate darkness, a carnal bloodlust that can never be satisfied, hate, insanity, chaotic destruction, despair... and it was shaped like a man. this is just one experience of mine, the first experience... there is so much more i could tell. to be clear, i make no claims. i don't have "powers". this isnt "the dead zone" here. i never asked to see these things. i wish it happened to someone else. i never wanted it. it hurts me to think or speak of it. i am very tired. it is 7:15am where i am... i hope that someone can take some insight from this. there is so much more that remains untold here. if i could plug into someone's head and show them it... heh, words just can't justify it. words are so easily passed off. the meaning sucked from them. i need to sleep. i pray that some good is done in my telling of these things that i try to keep buried in the past. make your own judgements people. your very own decisions. when you die, when i die... your life from that point on will be determined by your decisions, which are formed in your very own hearts. good night/good morning. all my love. |
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Thanks for sharing mate. Where I worked as a gardener before there was always weird goings on in a circle of oaks on the solstice etc. they found a beheaded rottweiler there one year. I thought this was nonsense when I joined, but I later found some organs that had been cut up (with a knife- far too clean/straight to be an animal's teeth/claws) just under the surface of the grass cuttings pile. The thing is- I had been putting the grass there, so there was no way they could of been in the grass when I was putting it there (I was emptying it from a mower) and yet when I turned it over (raked through the pile) at the end of the day I found them. The only explanation is that someone put them there (perhaps as a sick joke) during the middle of the day, whilst we were working... |
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What if you believe magick isn't actually magick per se? What if you believe it's just some small amount of power something evil gives you to draw you closer to it? You know, semi-humourous analogy, but a bit like a kiddie fiddler offering sweets to kids at the park? A nice gesture to get them interested? |
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Magick is a method, a tool. Any beings you call up are most likely projections of your inner being--so if you call up a nasty demon, it is because it was lurking in your subconcious anyway - and you have to 'defeat' it to progress -- the ultimate aim, for me, is Union. Of course, the beauty is, we can't tell if this is all subjective or objective, but to just blame magick for any nasty business is callow and unresearched. It is similar to certain psychoatives, in that they call up to the forefront, archetypal images from your subconcious for you to deal with - like some kind of cosmic therapy. It would be good to read a lot of Crowley and Regardie and other Occult writers to gain a better knowledge and perspective, so you can make up your mind about it. If you take up magick, you have to do it systematically and methodically, just as if you take LSD, the best results are gained if you pay attention to your Set and Setting. |
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wot marlowe said.. |
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Thank you for your insight flea ;) |
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hey don't mention me you bastard :P |
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I would add that if you're going to read Crowley (especially) or really any writers on these topics, do so with more than a pinch of salt (more like a shakerful). Exercise your bullshit detector! Nacmat: Yes, I've seen those "Osho Zen Tarot" cards. They don't really have anything to do with either Zen or Tarot. Osho was previously known as Rajneesh and had all sorts of nastiness associated with him. More can be found at this link: |
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Please expound on the "bullshit detector" phrase. |
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All I meant by it is that one's critical thinking and reasoning abilities should be used and not thrown out the window. Do not believe anything simply because somebody says it and claims authority. How does it fit in with your own experience? How does it fit with your conscience? What are your gut feelings about them and their message? That's the sort of thing I'm taling about. |
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I wouldn't say Crowley claimed Authority--and of course, he loathed the idea of being seen as some kind of figurehead or leader. Many of his books are beautifully well written guides to Yoga, meditation, the fundamentals of magick &tc... and then there are many libers of personal experiences of his own--and of course, he instructed students not to copy him, but to find their own path. So, I think, put down the bullshit detector, because his instructions are quite clear. For a beginner, I'd recommend books such as: 8 Lectures on Yoga, Magick Without Tears, and then maybe The Book of Thoth...but at the same time, as Crowley advocates, educate yourself on History, Language, the Qaballah, Religion &tc - the more knowledge one has going into Crowley, the more one gets out of it. |
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Well, I agree that Crowley did try to warn people off of the personality-cult fallacy, but perhaps not strongly enough -- have you seen how silly some Thelemites out there can get? The other thing about him was that he had a dark sense of humor, and put some really dry and outrageous jokes in his writings (which I don't expect he thought that anyone would ever take seriously). So part of exercising one's critical thinking abilities is simply a matter of getting the jokes. Of course the more knowledge one has, the better. It makes it harder for people to lie to you. |
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i would say crowley was a pompous man who's whole system of belief was based on his own wants and desires. a selfish man who not only didn't care about, but actually HATED his fellow man. his sickening view of humanity completely reflects the true nature of Satan. crowley was a pawn, a dupe. he possessed NO power. he was nothing. believe it or not, when you play with tarot or read crowley, you are letting something inside of you that wants NOTHING from you. it wants no "union". it only wants to destroy you. it's hate is unsatiated. i read a description of h.r. giger's spiritual beliefs once. the entirety of it was nothing but OBVIOUS deception and contradiction. the things he described were obvious elusions to the very thigns i have described. he too felt he must "union" with these things, work WITH them so that they would work FOR him. this will never happen. if you want someone or something to work for you and with you, you are barking up the wrong tree. you seek these things, and yet the avenue has already been paved. but Jesus didn't die for YOU, right? maybe himself or someone else, but never YOU. is it that hard to imagine love of that sort? someone once asked me why, as a christian, i was opposed to harry potter and in support of lord of the rings (tolkein was, byt he way, a very devout christian author). my answer was simply this: harry potter teaches children that the power can be theirs to wield according to their wants. lord of the rings teaches us that the power should NEVER be ours to wield, BECAUSE we would always do that very thing. |
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....and here we have the typical brainwashed & ignorant response that this thread was lacking... I agree about the dark sense of humour, Ganymede--as long as a person doesn't think magick is to be used to make themselves sexy or mundanely powerful (to name but a couple of clichés), then a study of magick is a fulfilling and stimulating activity-especially when used in conjunction with Yoga or even, say, chess...the thing I love about Crowley is his enthusiasm for life, and his insistance that a person study as wide a range of fields as possible, and seeing the joy in even the most seemingly mundane task...it's a good ideal. That's why I nominate him and Ernesto Guevara as my men of the 20th century! :) |
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bumpity bump Just baught a deck and a pretty cool little book DId to readings and was rather surprised with the results ! I can only to a 3 card spread realy, but then I've only had them for a day =oD Gonna practice on my mates soon =oD |
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i had a relaxed tarot at a park with a mate a month or so back mine said that id be dead someday, but that people would think that i was a cool dude :D |
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The Taro, like Yoga, is deeply misunderstood by many people in the West. ROTA TARO ORAT TORA ATOR |
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