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Suicide = Freedom?
 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 19:45 [#01664677]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



and monoid should be happy that he doesn't have 5 legs like
that lamb corrupted-girl posted. imagine what that lamb goes
through every single day :(


 

offline tolstoyed from the ocean on 2005-07-15 19:47 [#01664678]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator | Followup to jenf: #01664675



well, you sure got me scared for a second there..that
sounded well serious.


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 19:52 [#01664680]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker | Followup to tolstoyed: #01664678



well the responsibilty and job thing was serious. the last
one was just a 'if you're going to get all manic depressive
and kill yourself b/c *i* said something (and im someone
monoid does not know), then you honestly have issues beyond
anyone's control'

honestly though, ive been through the suicidal shit before,
and it passes over time. you get over it. unless you have
serious bipolar problems or something. then get to a doctor
and find a solution.

i was in a pretty stressful mess when i was finishing up
university, worried i wasn't going to find a job, etc etc
and then went to the doc, got some meds and it helped me
short term just to get me back on track and now im doing
good. i work in order to pay off a mortgage so that i can
own my home. and then eventually travel. and buy 10
powerbooks maybe. these are the things that make me happy.

but yeah.. like i said.. monoid's gotta figure out a
solution. if he can't, he's gotta find a head shrink or
something to help him out. gotta get back on the wagon of
life and off the wagon of suicidal hopelessness.

read a book. :)


 

offline r40f from qrters tea party on 2005-07-15 19:53 [#01664681]
Points: 14210 Status: Regular



hahaha! great thread.


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 19:56 [#01664683]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



oh and on an unrelated but related note:
I GOT THREE FREE CHARLES BUKOWSKI NOVELS FROM A COWORKER'S
GF!!! ISNT THAT FUCKING A+!!!!!!

and on a more related note: here's some food for thought -
if you killed yourself, you'd never see autechre live in
concert ever again. that would totally fucking suck.


 

offline r40f from qrters tea party on 2005-07-15 19:58 [#01664684]
Points: 14210 Status: Regular | Followup to jenf: #01664683



omg, you read bukowski? do you like have emo glasses and a
brown hat? you're right - being an Adult is soooo cool.
one day i want to be like you. A+++


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 19:58 [#01664685]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker | Followup to r40f: #01664684



shut the fuck up you sarcastic cock knocker!


 

offline Drunken Mastah from OPPERKLASSESVIN!!! (Norway) on 2005-07-15 19:59 [#01664686]
Points: 35867 Status: Lurker | Show recordbag



hahaha


 

offline Drunken Mastah from OPPERKLASSESVIN!!! (Norway) on 2005-07-15 20:00 [#01664687]
Points: 35867 Status: Lurker | Followup to Drunken Mastah: #01664686 | Show recordbag



that was supposed to be a followup to r40f #01664681


 

offline tolstoyed from the ocean on 2005-07-15 20:00 [#01664688]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator | Followup to jenf: #01664680



ah i see..so you were serious :)

well, i heavily disagree on that. i too think life sucks
either way you look at it..

"i work in order to pay off a mortgage so that i can own my
home. and then eventually travel. and buy 10 powerbooks
maybe."

that's all cool, but what do you really get out of it? well,
the travel part sounds good..one of 4 thngs worth living for
:)

anyway, i don't think monoid is serious about killing
himself :)


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 20:02 [#01664689]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



what you get out of it!?! what you get out of IT?!?!
you can resell the place for a higher price and get more
money to TRAVEL SOME MORE AND BUY MORE POWERBOOKS!

woo hoo


 

offline r40f from qrters tea party on 2005-07-15 20:03 [#01664690]
Points: 14210 Status: Regular | Followup to jenf: #01664685



don't worry about me - i'm just not an adult enough to
understand the finer points of a philosophy major's
trancedental Ultimate Template for all of human existence.


 

offline tolstoyed from the ocean on 2005-07-15 20:04 [#01664691]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator | Followup to jenf: #01664689



yes, that sounds like an awesome life you've got there. im
happy for you sir!


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 20:06 [#01664692]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker | Followup to r40f: #01664690



how is it that you've paid so much attention to my past
threads to know that im a philosophy major? ;) *FLATTERED*


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 20:12 [#01664694]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker | Followup to tolstoyed: #01664691



or get daily body massages from naked women with big boobs.


 

offline corrupted-girl on 2005-07-15 20:53 [#01664704]
Points: 8469 Status: Regular | Followup to tolstoyed: #01664691



what do you want?


 

offline tolstoyed from the ocean on 2005-07-15 21:00 [#01664706]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator | Followup to corrupted-girl: #01664704



can you be more specific?


 

offline corrupted-girl on 2005-07-15 21:02 [#01664707]
Points: 8469 Status: Regular | Followup to tolstoyed: #01664706



what would you want that would make life not suck so much
for you?


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 21:04 [#01664709]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



i know what corrupted-girl wants. she wants a nice loft
space with 5 baby kittens and an organic grocery store
downstairs!! actually, i want that too. hee.


 

offline tolstoyed from the ocean on 2005-07-15 21:04 [#01664710]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator | Followup to corrupted-girl: #01664707



1000 years for a start...and people who'd use their own head
and think sometimes.


 

offline corrupted-girl on 2005-07-15 21:05 [#01664712]
Points: 8469 Status: Regular | Followup to jenf: #01664709



yes!!

and a cute boyfriend with a nice package who isn't jealous
of my love for my kitties.

and powerbooks too!!!

:)


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 21:06 [#01664713]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



ya tolstoyed and crew hate me b/c they think im a fascist
bitch.
that's ok, i think they are fascists too.


 

offline corrupted-girl on 2005-07-15 21:07 [#01664714]
Points: 8469 Status: Regular | Followup to tolstoyed: #01664710



now, if everybody was like that.. then that wouldn't make
monoid so special anymore, eh?

haha


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 21:07 [#01664715]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



well, how about shane from l word? she's pretty hot.


 

offline corrupted-girl on 2005-07-15 21:08 [#01664717]
Points: 8469 Status: Regular | Followup to jenf: #01664715



yea! she'd make a cute boyfriend. hehe

she can cut my hair!


 

offline tolstoyed from the ocean on 2005-07-15 21:08 [#01664718]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator | Followup to jenf: #01664713



why would i hate you..i just find it weird you really belive
that stuff you said above :)


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 21:09 [#01664720]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



wait no.. how about uhh shit.. i forget her name.. you
know.. the one that .. ALICE!


 

offline corrupted-girl on 2005-07-15 21:09 [#01664721]
Points: 8469 Status: Regular | Followup to tolstoyed: #01664718



what don't you agree with? and why?


 

offline corrupted-girl on 2005-07-15 21:10 [#01664722]
Points: 8469 Status: Regular | Followup to jenf: #01664720



aw i like her.

damn i miss that show soo much! is it september yet? haha

i need my dyke fix.


 

offline tolstoyed from the ocean on 2005-07-15 21:10 [#01664723]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator | Followup to corrupted-girl: #01664721



i thought i explained that already..maybe i wasn't clear
enough :)


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 21:12 [#01664724]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker | Followup to tolstoyed: #01664718



tolstoyed: i dont believe in it like 'OMG THAT IS THE REASON
I LIVE!!' i say it b/c that's what i am setting my goals for
right now. it's not the be all and end all. :)

honestly, id probably be most happy living on a mountain top
with my bf, and watching cloud formations and fog pass all
day. oh, and fast internet. seriously.

but ive learned to like some material things in life, and i
dont think there's anything necessarily wrong w/ that. at
the same time, i dont think that everyone else should
*prescriptively* agree with me. some people dont. some
people like other lifestyles. that's their choice - that's
the 'freedom' of life in a sense :)

but i dont think i should be accused of anything bad if i
choose this life and i feel content. or do you disagree?


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 21:13 [#01664725]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



ya, two more months . bleh. i hope it's not the last season.
unless it starts sucking, then i do hope it is the last
season.

im going to check that lword site and see if they have any
more slips about season 3...


 

offline corrupted-girl on 2005-07-15 21:18 [#01664726]
Points: 8469 Status: Regular | Followup to tolstoyed: #01664723



i don't get what you want though.

is what you want purely dependent on how other people think?


 

offline r40f from qrters tea party on 2005-07-15 21:19 [#01664727]
Points: 14210 Status: Regular



"i dont think that everyone else should *prescriptively*
agree with me. some people dont. some people like other
lifestyles."

yet the undercurrent of most of your points in this thread
is a bizarre collection of some of the most overbearingly
judgemental, sweeping statements from a "i've seen it all
because i've been to college" type i've read in a long time.
guess what? you have finally got it, to an extent, with
this last statement - your cookie cutter version of the
world is completely wrong and badly formed.


 

offline tolstoyed from the ocean on 2005-07-15 21:19 [#01664728]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator | Followup to jenf: #01664724



i don't disagree, no..infact i strongly agree. if those
things make your life any better that is awesome! i too do
things and buy stuff that makes me happier. but that doesn't
make the fact that life sucks any less real. you will get a
bit more fun out of whatever time there's meant for you, but
we're all in the same shit in the end aren't we? but i
definitely agree on making your life as enjoyable as
possible!


 

offline r40f from qrters tea party on 2005-07-15 21:19 [#01664729]
Points: 14210 Status: Regular | Followup to r40f: #01664727



same thing for corrupted_girl.


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 21:27 [#01664730]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



r40f: ah putting words into my msgs. that makes you an ASS
:)

what i said early in this thread was half tongue in cheek
and half a reality check. honestly, what do you expect to be
a 'proper response' to this thread? half the people in here
are just shit talking anyway, and if i do the same and add
some reality to it, i get accused of being the 'i've seen it
all because ive been to college' type? come on. did i say
that university actually helped my perception? far from it.
maybe you should read my posts more carefully.

all i said was that i was having a rough time and thought
shit would never get better but it did. and if you read my
POSTS CAREFULLY then you'd see that im not telling monoid to
'go look for a job and then get a mortgage and revel in
capitalism'. im saying 'find a way to fix your gloom and
move on and you'll eventually get out of the rut'.

that is all.


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 21:30 [#01664733]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



and i should add, if you try to attack me with the comments
i made about how he wont be able to get a house, gf, this
and that, it's looking deeper into the reality of the
situation - you dont have any money to support your ass, you
get even more depressed and shit gets many times worse.
doesn't mean you HAVE to live to buy a house or do this or
that. it means you gotta stay afloat somehow and legally -
uuuuuussssuuuuuuaallly that means finding a job or doing
something to help others in this world. capitalist or not.


 

offline tolstoyed from the ocean on 2005-07-15 21:34 [#01664737]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator



money doesn't necessarily make you less depressed..infact im
not sure it's connected in any way.


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 21:36 [#01664738]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



true. it can make people even more depressed. BUT LETS JUST
CLARIFY: it's making me generally content right now. NOT
EVERYONE ELSE. sheesh


 

offline tolstoyed from the ocean on 2005-07-15 21:38 [#01664739]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator



"you dont have any money to support your ass, you
get even more depressed "

i don't want to be an arse, but that sounded much like
generalization to me :)

i'll fcuk off now.


 

offline r40f from qrters tea party on 2005-07-15 21:39 [#01664740]
Points: 14210 Status: Regular | Followup to jenf: #01664730



i'm just pointing out that you were indeed just talking
shit.


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 21:43 [#01664742]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



true. because how do you eat? you grow your own food in your
garden? fine. where do you get the seeds? you buy them.
where do you live? in a house or apt? do you live there for
free? is someone paying for it? did you build it yourself?
if so, do you pay property tax on it? where do you get your
clothes? do you make them yourself? fine. where did you buy
the sewing machine? did you get it for free? where did you
get the fabric? did you grow cotton in your own field? ...
list goes on..

and i quote: "im saying 'find a way to fix your gloom and
move on and you'll eventually get out of the rut'. "

and im trying to see the association any of this conclusion
has to "i don't want to be an arse, but that sounded much
like
generalization to me :) "


 

offline plaster from splitska 10 on 2005-07-15 21:44 [#01664743]
Points: 4173 Status: Regular



LAZY_metanoia


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 21:45 [#01664744]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



r40f: you're not making any sense? maybe you're the one
talking shit?


 

offline plaster from splitska 10 on 2005-07-15 21:46 [#01664745]
Points: 4173 Status: Regular | Followup to jenf: #01664744



just lay off, ur too old for us!


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 21:49 [#01664746]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker



ya seriously


 

offline r40f from qrters tea party on 2005-07-15 21:57 [#01664750]
Points: 14210 Status: Regular | Followup to jenf: #01664744



it's really not important. i'm sorry for saying what i had
to say in a mean way.


 

offline bogala from NYC (United States) on 2005-07-15 22:02 [#01664753]
Points: 5125 Status: Regular



What do you do for a living corrupted-girl ? How old are
you? You seem really sure about things. I like your attitude
about not wallowing in self-pity. It really is destructive.
I also like what you said about growing. Being forced into
things. So true.

I will say that what I've learned in my 30 years is there
are no guarantees. I don't see how an 18 or 21 year old
could really know what they want to do for a living or most
importantly what there job will be like to them after
working there for more than 6 months. Most things come at a
cost. Every job has a shitty edge. A couple things about it
you just hate having to do and if yours doesn't than god
bless you. You are one lucky mother-fucker. Not to mention
having to work with at least one asshole that gets on your
nerves, or living in fear of your boss, or wondering whether
you are doing a good enough job so you don't get fired.
Serious stress when you have a mortgage a couple kids, and a
car payment. Maybe you could freelance or run your own
business, but of course there are a host of other problems
there.
I don't see any silver bullet job for anyone. Unless you
are so sure about what you love and there is a perfect
market for it and you are really talented so you can tune
all the shitty elements of that job out. Then you have
really got it. Like my Uncle who loves cars and always has.
He would build the mofos in his room as a kid. Engine parts
everywhere. Now he's making custom cars for bill gates and
sienfeld http://www.canepa.com/ . He probably has shitty
things he hates doing or people he can't stand at work or
his boss might be a prick, but he loves his work so much the
benifit outways the cost. You have to know yourself and
what you're capable of. What environments you want to work
in, etc...
I just wish I was as tough as you and so sure of what I
wanted at your age. (I'm assuming you are in your early
20's)..I was mostly just a drunk and flipped burgers.


 

offline jenf from Toronto (Canada) on 2005-07-15 22:06 [#01664754]
Points: 1062 Status: Lurker | Followup to bogala: #01664753



this is true - back when i was 18-19 i fucked around by
screwing up at school and doing lots of drugs and going to
raves. im 26 now and still learning, but trying to work hard
and have it pay off in my later years. yes, work can be
tiring, but if you are lucky and you manage to land a job
you can deal with even in high stress, then it's a good
deal.


 


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