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 Now online (2)steve mcqueen Roger Wilco ...and 401 guests Last 5 registered Oplandisks nothingstar N_loop yipe foxtrotromeo Browse members... |
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Members 8025Messages 2614100 Today 13 Topics 127542 |
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I can remember back in late 1999 (I never thought I'd ever be saying back in 1999), when I got my first internet connection, a pay-as-you-go dial-up affair. It doesn't seem over seven years ago! And since I registered on Xltronic almost five years ago - half a decade! - so much has happened -- a marriage break-up, different flats and homes, relationships & friendships blossoming and then fading or exploding, jobs coming and going, the birth of my beautiful baby daughter. And I look back and realise that time really does flow so deceptively quickly, the years just glide by without comment. And every once in a while, you enter some small bright oasis, reflect and cast your mind backwards, and gape in disbelief that time has gone, these things have passed away never to return; that the things you've put off for another day have shrugged their shoulders and turned their back on you. It's scary, yet never enough to motivate me to change myself; nothing seems to be able to do that. In ten years I'll be 40 years old, and I wonder if I'll still be a pauper loser or if somewhere along the line I'll finally discover the inner strength and motivation to succeed at something. Let's all hold hands and pray together. |
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Life is brief, but when it's gone... love... goes on... and oooooon... |
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The answer is no and I think you know it. |
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Relax :) |
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You're probably right -- although, I do have literary agent who wants to sign me for a children's book I'm writing. If there's any hope of rising above low-paid jobs, it's writing. imdex, I'm afraid I'm one of life's worriers. |
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My whole life I've been a system/machine doing activities the machine wasn't designed for, and being prevented from doing activities the machine was designed for. |
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your life is very ok! you have a baby daughter! and internets are awesome! |
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A literary agent--nice. That's definately "a way out" I suppose. Children's books are a good market to enter into for a writer from what I hear. Well, not that it's easy to, but if you do you can make a decent living from it. Have you a synopsis you'd like to share? |
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Well, it's complicated and the themes keep growing all the time - I have two or three notepads for the developing themes, maps, characters etc. The story is called Alice Evergreen, and the title-character is a young teenage girl who has a younger brother named Miles. Their parents have moved them from the city to a village, East Summerton, on the coast. Near their house is an old ruined building which they explore soon after moving. A mist thickens on the lawn outside and shapes emerge. Her brother freaks out and rejects it, she embraces it. She is ethereal and spiritual and imaginative, he is earthly and robust and physical. It explores those themes and similar related themes. She befriends the spirit of a Victorian boy who haunts the building, while Miles befriends a local boy named Dominic, and they have their own boyish adventures. Eventually, something happens (I wouldn't spoil it!), and the family must move away from the village. Alice is faced with the choice: return with her family, or live eternally in the spirit world with Tom. It's kind of old-fashioned - more in the spirit of Swallows & Amazons than these trashy modern novels churned out nowadays. I'm sorry, I'm abysmal at writing synopsiseses, as I never know what to include, what to leave out, etc. |
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If only time would pass as slowly as when you were a young lad. When you were dying to get older and on with things. The irony. I fully understand . You put it very eloquently. I have been reflecting in this same thing. Maybe cause we are similar in age. I want to figure out how to make it go at half speed. |
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My editor is going to love this. Thank you so much! |
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Actually you have some good plot points there. Kids moving away from their friends and everything else that's familiar to live somewhere quite different. They find new, strange and interesting friends to help ease the trauma - for a child - of being away from what is home. Are their friends real or manufactured to cope? Then they must move again. Do they stay, left in their imagination/strange world of wonder/possible reality, or do they leave/grow up. Yeah, really nice idea there. Definately work it all out. It could be something profitable and life fulfilling. |
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Thanks for that -- I've given copies of it to friends at work (well, the first 10,000 words), and it went down well: they often ask me how the writing is going, when it's going to be finished, the characters & relationships they like in the story, so it makes me feel better about it. And the good thing is that the range of ages of these people is from about 17 up to my age, so I get a good cross-section of views. |
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I remember round about '95 when my dad set up this lousy connection at home. It was amazing. I remember secretely looking up pictures of WWF's Sunny, my heart racing with the fear of being caught but also of the excitement her large breasts gave me. Typing "boobs" into altavista and not having to worry about 'adult key' when viewing the porn. Painstackingly slow multiplayer games. Downloading 'Net Bus' and then stressing when some creep started opening up my cd rom drive and taking control of my key functions. Quake CTF. Ultima Online. My adolescent newspro.cgi rant blog site "Backwater Views" before blogs were everywhere (I was so cool). Bless. |
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i've been online since around 96 when we had the first lousy, and expensive, isdn connection |
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1999? try 1994.. |
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I will read his later, looks interesting though. |
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Relax kid. I joined XLT a day before you, and for me you'll always be a n00b! |
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I prefer not to think about this kind of thing because I'm pretty sure life gets more disappointing the more you become familiar with it |
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I have become very aware at how fast things seem to have become for me in the last three years. I also know that before i really think about it again i will be thirty... God knows what would have happened by then. |
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I remember installing internet explorer on windows 95 then connecting to compuserve (I miss the sound of my modem, I got to know the sound routine, it was like a track on Chiastic Slide). Those were the days. |
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fot it in march 1999 on my old Packard Bell thing running 98. i didnt even like electronic music back then, fucking hell things have changed. |
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fot = got = gew = few |
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ever since last friday night, when i visited a buddhist dhamma hall, ive been imagining this lounge room without the computer, television, or speakers. wouldnt it be great to spend all the time i put into these devices in meditation? |
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It was amazing. I remember secretely looking up pictures of WWF's Sunny, my heart racing with the fear of being caught but also of the excitement her large breasts gave me. Oh hell yeah, likewise. Have you seen her lately though? Soooooeey! And yeah time marches on at warp speed, but for me I'm appalled at how little has happened during that period. Although the advent of Napster was a watershed moment my music listening career, and hence, my life. |
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Fuck. |
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I have those thoughts all the time :-/ |
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I think its good to have all your electronic timewasting wankery kept separate, I have a corner for stuff like reading books and sitting down and drinking tea and painting and writing letters. Sometimes when im sat at the computer I look over at it yearningly, but never the other way around |
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Good point - my main problem is that I don't have a desk, and my stereo system is in the hallway. It's hard to get down to write (I use a laptop) when I have no desk - I either have the laptop on a small side-table, or else sit in bed and write. I'm also addicted to background noise - I hate silence, and I know that's near catastrophic for me. |
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yeah time and our perception of it changes the more we are familiar with it. remember when you were like 6 and a song on the radio lasted fooorrreeevvveeerrr. when in reality songs on the radio are usually only around 4 minutes long. just how every year seems to pass by quicker. because every year we get used to all the seasons coming and going, that it's spring, no it's fall... damn it's summer already, shit winter again. i aksed my great grand mother when she was turning like 85 or whatever like, "hey nana, do years seem like months or weeks now since your 80?" but i don't remeber what she said cuz i was like 10. anyway, yeah when you're younger you're like fuck i wanna be 10, then i wanna be a teenager, then 16, 18 and 21. after that i still feel like i did mentally, who i was more or less, when i was 18, only difference now is i've just had an extra 8 years to realize what fuckin tools we all are when we are younger. which gives us the right to laugh and ridicule people younger than us because they don't (nor did we) see a difference between those who are older. which again is part of that realization factor of, "gee, i was a fuckin dumbass when i was that age." when ever we look back. when we are that age we struggle so hard to prove we are on the same level as those who came before us, while at the same time we never accept the fact that those who came since could ever be on the same level. discrimination. we wonder how we'll be different in the future, which is not any different we'll only have more time to experience things and add them too our personality as a sorta constant upgrading process to better ourselves. never claim to have things all figured out. you will be surprised later when you discover something new to change your perspective. |
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i hate that as i get older time goes by faster. for me it is like a disease |
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Time Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day You fritter and waste the hours in an off hand way Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town Waiting for someone or something to show you the way Tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today And then one day you find ten years have got behind you No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun And you run and you run to catch up with the sun, but its sinking And racing around to come up behind you again The sun is the same in the relative way, but youre older Shorter of breath and one day closer to death Every year is getting shorter, never seem to find the time Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines Hanging on in quiet desperation is the english way The time is gone, the song is over, thought Id something more to say PiNk FlOyD |
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Things sure have changed. From the early days of modem with the fear of every porn site I visited showing up on the telephone bill, to the cobalt internet gigalo extraordinaire I am now. Good times. |
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PiNk FlOyD |
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are you familiar with ajahn brahm? |
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Please don't paste worn lyrics in here, thanks. rockenjohnny - no, who's that? |
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hes a senior monk and the founder of the buddhist society of western australia, ive really enjoyed his talks. theyre all online at www.bswa.org if youre interested |
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Cheers, J. I've been trying to find a decent Buddhist society here, but it's looking a bit thin. I need spiritual guidance and support because I feel so aimless at the moment. |
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there's nothing sadder than telling your grandchildren about "that skateboarding video i saw on youtube". |
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ive been feeling very much the same, and out of touch. ajahn brahms compassion and humour has made me feel so much better. |
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I remember there was a period in my life when I was feeling real low about myself. It was just after the birth of my daughter, and me and her mother were having serious relationship troubles. I downloaded a whole bunch of Alan Watts lectures, and used to listen to them on the drive to and from work (it was an hour's drive back then). They really helped me, a lot! |
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