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Hello, I'm here to help.
 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2004-07-31 19:45 [#01291862]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker



If I can.

All I can offer is written language I'm afraid, given the
nature of the messageboard. I'm further limited to english
only and I can't post pictures. I am offering my writing to
you. Can I use this this service to help you in any way, if
even only by attempting to entertain you?

Your best most trusted pal,
w H w


 

offline mappatazee from ¨y¨z¨| (Burkina Faso) on 2004-07-31 19:46 [#01291864]
Points: 14292 Status: Lurker



Maybe you can help get earthleakage's head out of his ass?


 

offline Drunken Mastah from OPPERKLASSESVIN!!! (Norway) on 2004-07-31 19:48 [#01291865]
Points: 35867 Status: Lurker | Show recordbag



I need two eggs, milk and butter...


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2004-07-31 19:55 [#01291867]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker | Followup to mappatazee: #01291864



I only want to use my writing in this topic to help, not
negative scorn, even if jokingly. If earthleakage truly
would like my help in this matter though, he is welcome to
ask himself. Is there anything I can do for you? I like you
by the way.


 

offline earthleakage from tell the world you're winning on 2004-07-31 19:58 [#01291868]
Points: 27790 Status: Regular



please help me get my head out of my ass


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2004-07-31 19:58 [#01291869]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker | Followup to Drunken Mastah: #01291865



What is preventing you from getting these things? Is it a
lack of knowledge where to find them, lack of money, lack of
motivation or something else? Also do you truly need them,
or only desire them? I suspect your reply was not a true
request for help but rather an attempt to be funny. It was
funny though and I like you for making me laugh.


 

offline Drunken Mastah from OPPERKLASSESVIN!!! (Norway) on 2004-07-31 19:59 [#01291870]
Points: 35867 Status: Lurker | Followup to w M w: #01291869 | Show recordbag



it's 03:59, I'm drunk, and I need them for breakfast
tomorrow...


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2004-07-31 20:03 [#01291872]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker | Followup to earthleakage: #01291868



I cannot lend you the physical strength necessary to do this
as my help is limited to written english. This probably
would not be necessary anyway because I suspect you are
using this as a metaphor, and furthermore are not really
asking for my help but rather trying to be funny. And you
are being funny and I like you for it. If your request for
help is valid however, I would be glad to provide written
english in an attempt to help provided you supply me with
more specific information.


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2004-07-31 20:12 [#01291879]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker | Followup to Drunken Mastah: #01291870



My advice is to relax, put off a stressful trip to the
grocery store and make do with a substute breakfast item.
Cereal is recommended because you contribute less to the
misery of industrialized chickens and cows (or pteradactyls
and goats) by eating it instead. This advice is entirely
optional and I like you unconditionally as to whether or not
you take it.


 

offline Drunken Mastah from OPPERKLASSESVIN!!! (Norway) on 2004-07-31 20:16 [#01291881]
Points: 35867 Status: Lurker | Followup to w M w: #01291879 | Show recordbag



thankyou, my best most trusted pal, w M w!!!!


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2004-07-31 20:20 [#01291886]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker | Followup to Drunken Mastah: #01291881



You are welcome. I hope everything works out well for you.


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2004-07-31 20:31 [#01291892]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker



Thanks for writing to me everybody. I had fun. Now I will
log off.


 

offline horsefactory from 💠 (United Kingdom) on 2004-07-31 21:02 [#01291902]
Points: 14867 Status: Regular



Gays


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2004-08-01 10:14 [#01292176]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker | Followup to horsefactory: #01291902



Well, I'm a female and everyone who posted is male as far as
I know, so I don't see anything gay about us at all. You are
still my friend if you meant your remark to be scornful, and
even if you continue to be scornful. If you were to stab me
in the eye with a fork, I would still be your friend.


 

offline horsefactory from 💠 (United Kingdom) on 2004-08-01 10:18 [#01292182]
Points: 14867 Status: Regular



I was drunk. Sorry my friend, I meant no harm. I would like
you to help me, though. Could you tell me the easiest way of
cooking a pentagon?


 

offline big from lsg on 2004-08-01 10:21 [#01292186]
Points: 23624 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



sweet


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2004-08-01 10:27 [#01292195]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker | Followup to horsefactory: #01292182



The easiest way, as far as I know, would be the microwave.
With this fantastic device, your workload is comprised of
merely pushing a few buttons, opening and closing the door
and putting in and taking out the pentagon. If you currently
have no microwave, you must add the additional work of
obtaining a microwave. This normally requires difficult
tasks such as arriving at a store somehow, finding the item
and waiting in line.. not to mention working to obtain the
money to purchase it. So, if you have no microwave at this
time, I recommend using a simple frying pan. I recommend
placing the two dimensional pentagon flat in the pan,
not upright on one of its sides. This will maximize
the cooking surface area, thus decreasing the necessary time
needed to complete the cooking process, thus resulting in
the easier way as you requested. I hope this can help you in
some way. Take care.


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2004-08-01 10:31 [#01292197]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker | Followup to big: #01292186



Hello, could you, by chance, make use of any written english
words by me? I want to help you.. all of you. Really... if I
can. I can also type pseudorandom strings of alpha-numeric
characters if you desire.


 

offline happy cycling from berlin on 2004-08-01 10:37 [#01292209]
Points: 2786 Status: Regular | Followup to w M w: #01292197



i have a hard time being in the moment. i tend to analyze
and be too introspective. i wish i could let go entirely and
stop constantly gauging and estimating how my smallest
action is received by everyone around me. i feel as
self-conscious and as alienated as an awkward tourist,
whereever i am. obviously not always so dire -- i'm having a
pretty great day. but this is the general trend. help.


 

offline deepspace9mm from filth on 2004-08-01 11:02 [#01292230]
Points: 6846 Status: Addict | Followup to happy cycling: #01292209



Wow, i feel EXACTLY that way, constantly conscious of even
the smallest action you make (getting off the bus awkwardly,
making too little eye-contact when paying for stuff in shops
etc blah blah). I've been feeling pretty happy and content
lately, but that stupid stuff is always in the back of my
mind.

Help me w M w. Help me before i kill again.


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2004-08-01 11:04 [#01292233]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker | Followup to happy cycling: #01292209



Hello, here are some excerpts from the unabomber manifesto
which I hope help:

"Psychologists use the term 'socialization' to designate the
process by which children are trained to think and act as
society demands. A person is said to be well socialized if
he believes in and obeys the moral code of his society and
fits in well as a functioning part of that society... Some
people are so highly socialized that the attempt to think,
feel and act morally imposes a severe burden on them. In
order to avoid feelings of guilt, they continually have to
deceive themselves about their own motives and find moral
explanations for feelings and actions that in reality have a
non-moral origin. We use the term 'oversocialized' to
describe such people...

The majority of people engage in a significant amount of
naughty behavior. They lie, they commit petty thefts, they
break traffic laws, they goof off at work, they hate
someone, they say spiteful things or they use some
underhanded trick to get ahead of the other guy. The
oversocialized person cannot do these things, or if he does
do them he generates in himself a sense of shame and
self-hatred. The oversocialized person cannot even
experience, without guilt, thoughts or feelings that are
contrary to the accepted morality; he cannot think 'unclean'
thoughts... Thus the oversocialized person is kept on a
psychological leash and spends his life running on rails
that society has laid down for him. In many oversocialized
people this results in a sense of constraint and
powerlessness that can be a severe hardship. We suggest that
oversocialization is among the more serious cruelties that
human beings inflict on one another."

Also it may perhaps reduce your apparent alienation by
informing you I have the same feelings. Perhaps you would
find it useful to seek further information by googling
"oversocialization". I like you, bye.


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2004-08-01 11:16 [#01292239]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker | Followup to deepspace9mm: #01292230



It has been said that every vice was once a virtue in
history. There is nothing wrong with killing except that it
violates societie's modern moral code, ie. exhorted
rules and compelled laws. One suggestion might be to retreat
from society to the moon, thus regaining all of your own
personal autonomy that society has stripped from you. Then
killing will be right or wrong based on your own
personal morality. However, there will likely not be anyone
else on the moon, thus making the entire concept of killing
entirely meaningless and irrelevant, unless of course if
used on yourself (as you would be the only one capable of
being killed). You may perhaps also benefit from my response
to happy cycling. Take care, I like you.


 

offline happy cycling from berlin on 2004-08-01 11:30 [#01292263]
Points: 2786 Status: Regular | Followup to deepspace9mm: #01292230



it's nice to know i'm not alone in this.

w M w: it's not oversocialization. i engage in a lot of
blatantly sociopathic behavior without caring all that much.
it's more like how deepspace9mm's -- hyperconsciousness and
an acute sensitivity to one's own awkwardness is what it is,
and, for me at leasts, it manifests itself precisely in the
same situations as his. i'm better than i used to be -- i
can go to a club and dance and enjoy myself, but like
deepspace9mm said, it's always in the back of my mind, and
sometimes it's in the full front. but thanks for the
sympathy, anyhow.


 

offline earthleakage from tell the world you're winning on 2004-08-01 11:37 [#01292267]
Points: 27790 Status: Regular



i think thats pretty common


 

offline deepspace9mm from filth on 2004-08-01 11:40 [#01292270]
Points: 6846 Status: Addict | Followup to earthleakage: #01292267



Yeah i guess so, but sometimes i get kinda obsessive about
it. One small socially-awkward action can dictate my
behaviour for the rest of the day. It is officially A Cunt.
I feel really stupid later on.


 

offline obara from Utrecht on 2009-01-20 08:34 [#02266411]
Points: 19368 Status: Lurker



i need you to tell me which Information Society album is the
best


 

offline illfates from space (United States) on 2009-01-20 09:12 [#02266425]
Points: 844 Status: Regular



why is it, every time i write the perfect song, i fail?


 

offline swift_jams from big sky on 2009-01-20 13:01 [#02266517]
Points: 7577 Status: Lurker



w H, you are so good to us here at xltronic. My only query
is how bright will the sun shine when our eyes meet?


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2009-01-20 13:30 [#02266527]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker



I'm surprised I made an altruistic thread in 2004. I thought
I was mostly hating on dog belch for entertainment purposes
back then, not that I have a firm grasp on time.

obara- I am sorry but I do not recall ever hearing anything
by Information Society. I have however just finished eating
an entire box of rice-a-roni if that helps. I didn't eat the
box itself, just the cooked contents. I ate it in a bowl in
fact. You can find additional information here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vo-MM9WVcIY

illfates- I assume you meant:
'why is it, every time i try to write the perfect
song, i fail?', for if you write the perfect song then by
definition you don't fail to write it. If my assumption is
correct the question is riddled with subjectivity problems.
However I have searched long and far in the vivvle dimension
and found a gnome who thinks all your songs are perfect.

swift_jams- It seems to be a meaningless question because
our eyes will never meet. However given the time scales of
human lives compared to stars, if our eyes were to meet the
sun would probably shine approximately as bright as it is
shining right now.


 

offline gingaling from Scamworth (Burkina Faso) on 2009-01-21 09:49 [#02266705]
Points: 2281 Status: Lurker



weird complexions different people have, i have very few of
these feelings, like i give very little consious thought to
how people are perceiving my actions, and when a thought of
'what will they think?' hits my head the answer is usually,
'fuck em'

anyways w M w i dont understand music patterns and timing
and those things and this affects my dancing, ive been told
i dance like an un-coordinated child, just sorta flailing
about with my limbs all over the shop, how do i resolve
this?


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2009-01-21 11:23 [#02266723]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker | Followup to gingaling: #02266705



My prescription is to count thusly:
ONE, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight
TWO, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight
THREE, two, three, four, ...
etc all the way to SIXTY-FOUR. For every multiple of 8 (8,
16, 24, etc, you must fart when you say that number)
This must all be done while looking into the eyes of the
rdj-faced love child.
And you must get an erection that lasts at least 30 seconds
while counting. You should be able to dance fine after that.


 

offline CalumDamit from United Kingdom on 2009-01-21 11:27 [#02266726]
Points: 290 Status: Lurker



Can you make the thing for me I requested im my Topic awhile
back.


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2009-01-21 11:33 [#02266727]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker | Followup to CalumDamit: #02266726



I probably can but I probably won't.


 

offline obara from Utrecht on 2009-01-21 13:48 [#02266758]
Points: 19368 Status: Lurker | Followup to w M w: #02266527



that's OK, i've already asked mr S. Oulseek


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2009-01-21 13:52 [#02266760]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



Are you really female, wMw?


 

offline Samuel L Jigsaw from swine flu central on 2009-01-21 15:16 [#02266777]
Points: 345 Status: Regular



w M w, how come you never visit CaB any more?


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2009-01-21 15:35 [#02266782]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker



What is CaB?

I'm fefemale.


 

offline Advocate on 2009-01-21 16:14 [#02266789]
Points: 3319 Status: Lurker



w M w's words speaketh The Truth.


 

offline diamondtron on 2009-01-23 02:44 [#02267074]
Points: 1138 Status: Lurker



i have 2 german synth manuals that need translating to
english (a concise version would be ok, i am good at working
things out but these machines are a real mystery).
fee available. approx 20-30 pages each but not so much text,
a lot of it is diagrams to skip past.
audio or written translation acceptable.
knowledge of german and music making needed coz there are
concepts like CV/trigger/sequence/chaining that need
grasping.
needle in a haystack? anyone know anything better at german
than babel?



 

offline Zephyr Twin from ΔΔΔ on 2009-01-23 11:55 [#02267140]
Points: 16982 Status: Regular | Followup to diamondtron: #02267074 | Show recordbag



ijonspeches will probably do it if you ask him nicely. :)


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2009-01-23 14:05 [#02267167]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker



I'm done helping.


 

offline obara from Utrecht on 2010-11-28 16:00 [#02399504]
Points: 19368 Status: Lurker



My cat lost her mechanical toy mouse last night and for that
reason has been angry and in a very bad mood this whole
Sunday. Are you perhaps able to indicate at least specific
part of the living-room where the cyborg mouse is located ?
Cause it's quite impossible that it drove itself into
bathroom or kitchen - it would be spotted there right away.
Note: the mouse does not contain any metal parts, just
plastic and artificial fur - so it would be impossible to be
found by any metal detectors. Thanks !


 

offline wavephace from off the chain on 2010-11-28 17:26 [#02399509]
Points: 3098 Status: Lurker



2004 is dang long time ago!!!!


 

offline sadist from the dark side of the moon on 2010-11-28 18:27 [#02399511]
Points: 8670 Status: Lurker



ask the tsa. they can't find sharp objects but maybe a
cyborg mouse.


 

offline -crazone from smashing acid over and over on 2010-11-29 00:04 [#02399551]
Points: 11233 Status: Regular | Followup to obara: #02399504 | Show recordbag



the cat ate it


 

offline mohamed from the turtle business on 2010-12-01 09:53 [#02399699]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



w M w does help


 


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