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REFLEX
from Edmonton, Alberta (Canada) on 2004-02-15 15:45 [#01074617]
Points: 8864 Status: Regular
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At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon". In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:
If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (I just love this
part) :
1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. .... For some reason you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.
7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls
would operate in the same manner as the old car.
10.You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
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REFLEX
from Edmonton, Alberta (Canada) on 2004-02-15 15:46 [#01074618]
Points: 8864 Status: Regular
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I know its not too funny.. but its a 1 minute time waster.
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tolstoyed
from the ocean on 2004-02-15 15:48 [#01074622]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator
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hmm, is tere a car that don't break?
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tolstoyed
from the ocean on 2004-02-15 15:48 [#01074625]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator
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not that i like mocrosoft or something.
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Jedi Chris
on 2004-02-15 15:49 [#01074627]
Points: 11496 Status: Lurker
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Hahahahahha....thats an old one, but a good one!
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celloncllone
from anywhere but in (Germany) on 2004-02-15 15:54 [#01074632]
Points: 849 Status: Regular
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stick it to bill the blödmann
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elusive
from detroit (United States) on 2004-02-15 16:00 [#01074646]
Points: 18368 Status: Lurker | Show recordbag
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did you just get the internet yesterday?
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Anus_Presley
on 2004-02-15 16:07 [#01074658]
Points: 23472 Status: Lurker
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hahaha i've neverr rread that.
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Oddioblender
from Fort Worth, TX (United States) on 2004-02-15 16:14 [#01074665]
Points: 9601 Status: Lurker
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i've never read it either.... haha good stuff.
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REFLEX
from Edmonton, Alberta (Canada) on 2004-02-15 16:46 [#01074714]
Points: 8864 Status: Regular
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im sorry for those of you who are just too cool and up to date with everything on the goddamn internet for you exceedingly crazy nerds I aplogize. and for the rest of us, we can atleast laught a little bit. without being a dick.
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Jazembo
from The Earth ball on 2004-02-15 17:13 [#01074748]
Points: 2788 Status: Regular | Followup to REFLEX: #01074617
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"What can I say?"
right thread this time :)
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REFLEX
from Edmonton, Alberta (Canada) on 2004-02-15 17:16 [#01074749]
Points: 8864 Status: Regular
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haha! cool.
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acrid milk hall
from United Kingdom on 2004-02-15 17:17 [#01074751]
Points: 2916 Status: Lurker | Followup to Jazembo: #01074748
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definitely more amusing in this context. :)
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Asche XL
on 2004-02-15 17:20 [#01074753]
Points: 4241 Status: Lurker
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Hahaha, that was great REFLEX.
So true *shakes head on the way to the mac store*
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horsefactory
from 💠 (United Kingdom) on 2004-02-15 17:25 [#01074756]
Points: 14867 Status: Regular
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Yeah, cars.
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Jazembo
from The Earth ball on 2004-02-15 17:50 [#01074778]
Points: 2788 Status: Regular | Followup to acrid milk hall: #01074751
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yeh :) this is why we need post editing capabilities!
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REFLEX
from Edmonton, Alberta (Canada) on 2004-02-15 23:53 [#01074893]
Points: 8864 Status: Regular
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cool
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