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mmmm bop
 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-06-23 09:42 [#00281226]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker



http://www.xmission.com/~maddox/hansonblows.html

"aren't people self conscious anymore".. it's the perfect
thing to say in regard to that picture. This guy's stuff is
funny.

I forgot about that track mmm bop though, I remember it and
liked it in the same sick way I like george michael's
wham!.

mmm bop
yeah yah
mmm bop
didalee ow um
mmm bop
yeaaah uh
mmmm mmm bop
yeah eeee yeah uh

"I want someone to write a track where every word in the
lyrics are modified just enough so that they're barely still
understandable."
for example the preceding paragraph would become
"lye fwant chumfoon toofrite ee tarkoo weer efery worb ib fa
libiks arf mardifly ... etc."
On a side note crank yankers was quite good despite the
massive amount of hype that would lead me to have predicted
otherwise. It was worth watching just to see the messed up
version of big bird. On another side note, I am an idiot.


 

offline weatheredstoner from same shit babes. (United States) on 2002-06-23 09:45 [#00281230]
Points: 12585 Status: Lurker



Ya know who just dropped off the face of the universe?

Yes, thats right Hanson. And they did it so gradually too,
its almost like they never existed at all.


 

offline aron from saskatoon (Canada) on 2002-06-23 10:07 [#00281244]
Points: 3756 Status: Lurker



the dust brothers produced hanson's album.

i learned that the other day.

interesting fact.


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-06-23 10:53 [#00281281]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker



Talking to people is a waste of time. I tried a new chat
program the other day (out of sheer mind-numbing boredom),
and I was bombarded with messages from strangers wanting to
chat. Okay, great. So I decided to give it a try. No matter
what I'd say, they'd always answer in one or two words
and/or syllables (even to open ended questions--go figure).
This particular chat program allowed each user to have a
profile in which they could list hobbies or interests, and
some stupid quotes that govern their lives.

Of the people I talked to, 90% of them listed "I like to
have fun" as one of their "interests." Who the hell doesn't
like to have fun? What a stupid thing to say. "Hi, my name
is dumbass. I like to have fun in my spare time. I'm too
shallow to have any real hobbies or interests, so I'm going
to play it safe and rattle off an array of universal traits
that everyone can relate to, just in case someone suspects
me of having a personality or opinion of my own." Most of
the people I talked to WROTE EVERYTHING IN CAPS. What right
do they have to be this stupid?

I can just see them now. Those morons, sitting at a login
prompt, typing their password incorrectly, over and over,
because their caps lock key is on. "Why won't it work?" They
might ask. "I'm typing my password correct; I could have
sworn it was abcdefg. Why isn't it working?" How can they be
so inept?

Okay, new rule. First of all, if you make your password
abcdefg, you will be shot. Second rule, if you don't type
your password correctly in six tries, you will be shot (or
shot again, if you broke the first rule). Maybe that will
keep these personality deprived idiots off of computers. Any
hackers out there? We need a new virus or worm to wipe out
the internet. I'm tired of it.

Also, there are too many personal home pages. Too many
people making web pages for their pets, too many dancing
hamsters, and too many love web sites. There's just too much
crap out there. We need a new policy. Advertisers need to
stop making it so at


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-06-23 10:54 [#00281282]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker



Advertisers need to stop making it so attractive for
companies to give out free web pages, and people need to
carefully consider the consequences of putting up another
personal home page listing some stupid hobbies and interests
that nobody cares about, so just in case somebody goes to
the page by accident, they don't waste their time reading
another boring and pointless bio about a stupid kid in high
school that likes to listen to Smashing Pumpkins or Aqua.
Nobody wants to read this stuff, yet people feel compelled
to put their thoughts down on the internet for everyone to
read. I suppose I'm guilty of this. Or maybe I have a hidden
agenda. Maybe I know that reading my web page is a waste of
time, and it somehow feels satisfying that I can waste my
time to write this web page once, and thousands of others
will waste their time reading it, thousands of times. I'm
wasting more of your time than I am mine. I'm making a
profit.


 

offline Sido Dyas from a computer on 2002-06-23 11:05 [#00281291]
Points: 8876 Status: Lurker | Followup to w M w: #00281282



HAHA!! i agree!!
Did you write this?
Keep it coming....


 

offline wayout from the street of crocodiles on 2002-06-23 20:31 [#00281787]
Points: 2849 Status: Lurker



heheh...so true...
when i was bored i used to get on instant messenger..and
find people through the find a buddy wizard..i would pick
the most flaky looking of the bunch (which wasnt hard...i
probably couldve just closed my eyes and clicked names
blindly) and then start messaging them with random
stuff..sometimes i would actually say things..like talk
about having sex with sock puppets and stuff..other times i
would just write random symbols...it was quite funny
sometimes...most of these stupid teeny bopper girls could
think of anything better to say than A/S/L?????? i could
hold conversations for hours of just me typing random things
while the other person kept responding...but never saying
much more than A/S/L???? ..eventually they would start
getting pissed and say stuff like "IF YOU DONT TELL ME YOUR
A/S/L IM GOING TO REPORT YOU!!!!!11"

its sad that these real people have the same amount of
personality as the chat bots who go around selling porn...


 

offline wayout from the street of crocodiles on 2002-06-23 20:31 [#00281790]
Points: 2849 Status: Lurker



revision no. 1 "could think" should be "could not think"


 

offline Ophecks from Nova Scotia (Canada) on 2002-06-23 20:39 [#00281799]
Points: 19190 Status: Moderator | Followup to w M w: #00281281 | Show recordbag



That was an awesome post. You say lots of things that I'm
thinking, but I'm too lazy/busy to bother typing out, and
for this I commend you.

*tip of the hat


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-06-23 22:53 [#00281971]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker



I did not write it, but maybe I'll take credit for it
anyway. Yes it's my sight, (go to that link on the top of
the page) I've laughed to the point of tears more than once.
That penguin guy suggested it.



 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-06-23 22:54 [#00281976]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker



wayout, you totally need to see crank yankers, what with
your (and my) interest in muppet porn and all.


 

offline Zephyr Twin from ΔΔΔ on 2002-06-23 23:35 [#00282023]
Points: 16982 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



well said, w M w.

wayout: I used to do that same thing, except I would pick
random names and then begin holding conversations with them
like i thought they were someone else. For instance, once I
kept asking this one girl if she had met her contact or
recieved the documents for project jesus lizard, and she
kept saying "IM TELLING YOU I DONT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOUR
TALKING ABOUT!" over and over, it was great.

Question: Are some people too stupid to realize when other
people are bullshitting them? The people I used to mess with
seemed not to....


 

offline wayout from the street of crocodiles on 2002-06-24 00:55 [#00282166]
Points: 2849 Status: Lurker



m: yeah ive seen one episode of that show so
far...genious..
are those real recorded prank calls? the commercials lead me
to believe so...

zephyr: my friend and i did something like that
once...except the other way around...we convinced some
random person that we were someone they knew ...and i forget
what exactly happend..but i guess we fucked up that persons
relationship with someone because of our antics...sad i
know..but in a funny, pitiful way...


 

offline pachi from yo momma (United States) on 2002-06-24 01:37 [#00282216]
Points: 8984 Status: Lurker



they were easily mistaken for girls


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-06-24 08:09 [#00282565]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker



listen to this guy preach! go read all his stuff, it's worth
it:
Are you an executive? Do people follow you around and kiss
your ass all day long? If so, then chances are that you're
pretty good at bullshitting. Bullshitting is the act of
putting on the appearance that you know what you're talking
about. I do it, you do it, everyone does it. Executives just
happen to do it very well.

Everyone at one point in their lives will work for an
asshole. It's inevitable. Where do they come from? These
sages of bullshit, weilding uncanny powers to deceive and
exaggerate? From college of course!

Throughout grade school you may have noticed several
distinct categories of people. There are always
head-up-their-ass jocks, slutty cheer leaders, nerds, and
drop outs. After high school, the jocks realize that they're
completely worthless and decide to go to college to justify
their existence. Once in college, they take all the bullshit
classes like philosophy, english, accounting, and anything
business related. Three years into college, they decide to
get a business major, and graduate to become a manager
somewhere. Rather than taking any classes in school that
require more than a pulse to graduate, they take the easy
route and get a BS degree in business (bullshit).

All the asshole jocks that gave you a hard time in school
end up being your boss at work! To add insult to injury,
they get paid ludicrous amounts of money to pretend to know
what they're doing! They'll sit around with their thumbs up
their asses in their huge offices, and give you absurd
requests to accomplish the impossible, taking all the credit
for it if it's good, and they'll still have the gall to
bitch about it if it's not. They'll pick on you to feel
better about themselves and they'll go home early every day.
Every potential holiday is milked for all it's worth, giving
them an excuse not to come in. All the while they preach
bullshit about integrity in the work place and
professionalism-- usually after going to a strip club for
lunc


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-06-24 08:10 [#00282566]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker



-- usually after going to a strip club for lunch.

When it comes down to results, they can bullshit like no
other. Using obscure business jargon to make themselves
sound intelligent during meetings. If you should catch them
in one of their complex fabricated contradictions, they'll
either call it a policy or deny it all together. Cowards.
All of them. It's ironic how little any of them know about
anything. If put into any other real-world scenario, they
would die instantly. They have no skills, no natural
talents. Nothing. Only the ability to bullshit and kiss
ass... and sometimes that's all they need.

It truly doesn't matter what you're capable of, but who your
friends are at work. How much work you do is inversely
proportional to how big your salary is. The next time you're
stuck at work in a stuffy office, forced to listen to some
asshole rattle off meaningless bullshit, ask them this
question: "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?" Bulge your
eyes and stand up for the best effect.

The room will grow quiet and everyone will look at him.
He'll be directly put on the spot. He won't have anything to
say. Then ask the people in the room "Does anyone really
know what the hell's going on? All you people ever do is
babble about meaningless bullshit and nothing ever gets
done. You can't justify anything you've said, ever, and I'm
not going to take this anymore." Then say "You're all full
of shit. Admit it." Gradually, they'll all admit that their
entire career is a sham and that they are completely
worthless. Just once I'd like to hold up a sign during a
meeting that says in big black letters "YOU'RE FULL OF SHIT.
SIT DOWN." I can't believe how easily these bastards get
away with it.. none of them know what they're talking about.
NOBODY DOES. Worthless.



 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-06-24 08:14 [#00282569]
Points: 21424 Status: Lurker



"Thath company polithy" ugh. character limitations in posts
sucks, but that's aphex twin.nu's policy, heh heh. I only
posted it because I know you're all too lazy to go there
yourselves, not that any of you can read anyway so why did I
bother. Idiots. (this guy is rubbing off on me)


 

offline wayout from the street of crocodiles on 2002-06-25 02:10 [#00283889]
Points: 2849 Status: Lurker



yeah...could you try copying it phonetically next time
please?


 

offline Ctrl Alt Del from Ft. Worth (United States) on 2002-06-25 02:50 [#00283901]
Points: 2190 Status: Lurker | Followup to w M w: #00281971



Thank you for giving credit.Maddox is a genios. Crank
yankers is a kick ass show. This is the kind of situation
when you need the "kick people in the croth" type of
solution.


 


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