i wrote a little bit of a sex book | xltronic messageboard
 
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i wrote a little bit of a sex book
 

offline Cliff Glitchard from DEEP DOWN INSIDE on 2009-11-09 18:51 [#02343326]
Points: 4158 Status: Lurker



it was a warm and pleasent evening in devon, 1951... so
around 10 to 8 on a 12 hour clock. tim was anxiously waiting
the best night of his life, that had been promised to him by
the sizzling hot daughter of a pig farmer. he waited with
bated breath for her immense presence, like a greedy fat kid
queuing at macdonalds. he longed for her, eagerly awaiting
the exquisite taste of her delightful clunge he so wanted to
experience. the moment was gratefully upon him, no less than
the knowing peak of a junkies next hit, as she strode in to
his rented mobile abode like a gorgeous world champion sumo
wrestling goddess. being the gentleman he is, he helped her
squeeze out of her wellies, discreetly sniffing the aroma
inside them before he placed them next to his tattered
dunlops. she raised her arms in a teasing stretch revealing
small curly sweat covered hairs that glistened in her
armpits like
a bead of cum on a brothel curtain rail. he was in for a
treat, as she was going to school him in the art of tantric
drinking, followed by barely concious romance, that would
inevitably involve baby oil and whips. his heart skipped a
beat in anticipation for her beauty and oversized clitoris,
that he would worship in his mouth like a savoured fruit
pastille that he dare not chew. he loved fruit pastilles,
but he loved her more. he grabbed her big flapping goal
keeper hands and lightly directed
her to his bunk bed, enticing her wonderfully obese legs to
thud their way towards his star wars duvet. after many
flaggons of homemade hooch the inebriated pig farmers
daughter chucked aside the lovers pair of mugs and beckoned
him closer with her finger, whilst licking her substantially
hairy lip in a saucy manner. his eyes brightened with
excitment, and so did the contents of his baggy, pee stained
y-fronts. this was his heaven. this is all he had dreamt for
many years.


 

offline Cliff Glitchard from DEEP DOWN INSIDE on 2009-11-09 18:51 [#02343327]
Points: 4158 Status: Lurker



with one quick flick, his skidmarked underpants flew off his
tiny pin legs and up on to the top bunk, in which his one
armed, deaf brother slept unaware of the hooch fueled lusty
lovers that were beneath him. squidgily his damp, bushy
gusseted queen and her huge inbred, beast like 7 foot frame
covered his puny 7 stone body. she reached down to grab his
throbbing wang to guide like a missile into her warm velvet
tunnel, when suddenly she
farted...

...meanwhile her doting husband was earning his crust in the
stable, training whippets to rape horses for the benefit of
depraved millionaire japanese businessmen.


 

offline atwood from The Library (United Kingdom) on 2009-11-09 18:54 [#02343329]
Points: 2236 Status: Regular | Followup to Cliff Glitchard: #02343327 | Show recordbag



youre a sick man,cliff.
will you marry me?


 

offline Cliff Glitchard from DEEP DOWN INSIDE on 2009-11-09 19:10 [#02343337]
Points: 4158 Status: Lurker | Followup to atwood: #02343329



i'd marry you so hard you'd wish your ring finger had never
been born*

*or something else manly and sexy that was better.


 

offline earthleakage from tell the world you're winning on 2009-11-09 19:18 [#02343341]
Points: 27790 Status: Regular



i didnt read that i just wanted to say hello


 

offline earthleakage from tell the world you're winning on 2009-11-09 19:18 [#02343342]
Points: 27790 Status: Regular



i saw no evil


 

offline atwood from The Library (United Kingdom) on 2009-11-09 19:20 [#02343345]
Points: 2236 Status: Regular | Followup to Cliff Glitchard: #02343337 | Show recordbag



Reminds me of that old bluegrass classic "I gave her a
ring,she gave me the finger."



 

offline Cliff Glitchard from DEEP DOWN INSIDE on 2009-11-09 19:20 [#02343346]
Points: 4158 Status: Lurker | Followup to earthleakage: #02343341



hello!


 

offline earthleakage from tell the world you're winning on 2009-11-09 20:40 [#02343369]
Points: 27790 Status: Regular



hello hello its good to be back good to be back

oh dear...


 

offline Zephyr Twin from ΔΔΔ on 2009-11-09 21:01 [#02343371]
Points: 16982 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



I came.


 

offline rad smiles on 2009-11-09 21:27 [#02343375]
Points: 5608 Status: Lurker



I saw.


 

offline Zephyr Twin from ΔΔΔ on 2009-11-09 21:30 [#02343376]
Points: 16982 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize anyone was watching.


 

offline gingaling from Scamworth (Burkina Faso) on 2009-11-10 03:14 [#02343397]
Points: 2281 Status: Lurker



nice work


 

offline Ahab from Groningen (Netherlands, The) on 2009-11-10 06:59 [#02343410]
Points: 88 Status: Regular



A good story, has anyone already read the book that one guy
from cassetteboy (!!!) wrote? Earth inc. , it's called.
I'm a big fan of cassetteboy and as soon as i have some
money i think i'll order the book

"A funny, charming, inventive comic novel. Michael
Bollen’s warmth, sharp wit and eye for satirical detail
reminded me of Douglas Adams. Quite possibly the best work
of fiction since The Bible."

LAZY_TITLE


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2009-11-10 18:11 [#02343516]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Followup to : #02343404 | Show recordbag



Yeah, I was about to cum until I read that part! :(

Oh, wait!

...

There I go. ^^


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2009-11-10 18:11 [#02343518]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



fave +


 

offline pulseclock from Downtown 81 on 2009-11-10 18:14 [#02343519]
Points: 6015 Status: Lurker | Followup to Ahab: #02343410



The Bible is not fiction


 

offline Ophecks from Nova Scotia (Canada) on 2009-11-10 18:14 [#02343520]
Points: 19190 Status: Moderator | Show recordbag



This book will get Fabio out of unemployment at last


 


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