 |
|
You are not logged in! F.A.Q Log in Register |
 |
|
 |
 Now online (2)Tony Danza big ...and 45 guests Last 5 registered Oplandisks nothingstar N_loop yipe foxtrotromeo Browse members... |
 |
Members 8025Messages 2609386 Today 20 Topics 127256 |
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
I hope it'll make girls come to me... |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
depends on what it says on the box i suppose. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
I took the standard stuff, not the "for huge cocks" one. It smells of vanilla. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
ahh there you go..i wouldn't keep my hopes too high if i were you. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
I don't have a lot of hope to be honest, but this box will decorate my dining room. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
Combo you are like a funny Monoid |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
posh wank |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
the dining room is definitely the place to put them. definitely. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
You should wear one everytime you go out, because you never know when a girl is going to be hot for combo. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
awww bless |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
Actually, buying condoms seems a stupid thing to do when u don't have sex, but I considered buying them a while ago and never got the balls to take the box at the supermarket and present it to the girl with the barcode reader, and paying, while she is smiling. I've earned some confidence. :) |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
you could practise putting them on on carrots |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
go in again tomorrow and buy another box. it will look like you get lots of sex and when purchasing you can do a cheeky wink |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
with his mouth |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
What happened to that hot officewoman? |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
My favourite thing to do in the chemist is buy condoms and hemorrhoid cream at the same time. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
Hemorrhoid cream is good for new tattoos. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
And for those meaty grape-like things that sometimes hangs out of the ass |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
fill the condom with lube, put it on, place your penis between 4-6 pillows and hump away! |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
fill the condom with lube, put it on, place your penis exhaust! |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
The tailpipe of the car is, of course, where the exhaust comes out. So in this sense, the tailpipe is an anus. Now, the first thing you should note is that the inside of the tailpipe is usually coated with soot. This is the usual particulate debris of combustion. Before having sex with the car, clean the inside of the tailpipe with soap and warm water, as far as you can go. Keep in mind the possibly sharp edge of the tailpipe. Now that the tailpipe is clean, you are ready to pleasure and be pleasured by the car. You can do this two ways. One way doesn't require any equipment. The other way (which is much more rewarding) does. The first way is to fuck the car 'raw'. This does NOT mean stuffing your cock into the tailpipe and thrusting. This would hurt (remember the sharp edges?) and be no fun anyway, since the tailpipe doesn't flex. What you should do is get behind the car and start jerking off. When you are about to come, carefully put your cock into the tailpipe of the car, and then come. But, in the heat of passion, you must still remember the sharp edge. Even putting just the head into the tailpipe is good enough. Just make VERY sure that you don't hurt yourself. Now, this assumes that you can get your cock into the tailpipe in the first place. Some tailpipes are too small, and then, well, you're out of luck. Find someone who has a car with a bigger tailpipe. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
WARNING If you anthropomorphasize your 4 wheeled lover, it's worth remembering that its a fantasy. A fun, sexy fantasy, but a emotional/sexual/mental construct. Despite my own enjoyment, a car isn't actually a person. Except during sex LOL. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
that was a quote. which i didnt read properly. honest. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
But I only has two pillows!!!? |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
hi combo |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
Combo, you still not a man yet? Time to visit a whore me thinks. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
I'm still working on it with my coworker, perhaps soon in my bed who knows? |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
I do. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
|
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
who can that hairy man be ? |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
Hmmm....:P |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
i dare you to throw the wrapper of one into the back seat of a married mans car |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
hah! |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
good luck combo |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
why did you buy a box of condoms |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
combo, you so crazy. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
Ahahah totally lol. I asked that girl out for Josh Rouse concert. She said "ok, can i comle with friends?", I said "ok..." but due to a strike we probably won't go. Then she talked about the films she wanted to like. I said I'd like to see that Cronenberg too, and asked if she wants to go with me. She said "friday, i can't", "saturday i can't", "sunday i can't, i like to stay at home all day on sunday", "monday i can't", "tuesday i can"t (...) and the over weekend i won't be there..." I insisted on Sunday but no way she wanted..... So ok, i guess it's totally dead. Funny becuz yesterday, she tickled me again, touched my foot again, wanted to eat with me, came and talk to me, etc. I cried at lunch, but it's ok now. I guess she's a total bitch. I'm gonna put the candles she gave me before her holiday, the postal card she sent me during the holiday and the canadian peanut butter she gave me today 'she spent her holiday in Canada). Fuck that bitch. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
* put all her presents IN THE TRASH |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
Send this to me instead of throwing it all away. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
wow |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
You cried because of that? |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
Yeah. I've been in love for 2 months and it kinda spoilt my holiday. I'm too emotive I think. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
women are totally oblivious to the pain they cause. either that or they get a kick out of it. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
|
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
Oh god I want that t-shirt. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
She has sooo sorted you into the "friend" folder mate. =( That doesn't mean you can't still get her tho , trust me . It just takes some special tactics from your side. Pimping is a dirty game. BTW Razorblades sugestion on going to get more condoms at the same place isn't that bad at all. It will impress that cuty in the counter. Don't overestimate females , they are simple creatures just like us. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
The sad thing is that when you FINALLY have sex with a woman its going to be clumsy and last as long as a television commercial |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
after you purchase the next box of condoms why dont you take one out of the box right there at the check out and give it to her and then write your number on the reciept. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
| |||||||||
|
|
of course you have to give the girl the recipt with your number, too. don't forget that. |
||||||||
|
|
|||||||||
|
Messageboard index
|
|||||||||
