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Gwely Mernans
from 23rd century entertainment (Canada) on 2007-02-16 10:37 [#02051007]
Points: 9856 Status: Lurker
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Think if there was an army of like 1000 Rambo clones. They would form into a giant rambo, each rambo would be one of the muscle strains, with a gun. It would shoot from all directions Think of all the rambos talking in unison, in their jargoned nonsensical brooklyn mumbles. It would be so disgusting, when rambo lifts and eyebrow it would be one of the rambo arms painted in army mud, as to look like an eyebrow. and every now and then the rambo that signifies the ultra rambos lower lip falls off from time to time, due to the fact that when rambo talks its like someone put antifreeze in his lips. And when the ultra rambo steps on people, the rambos that form its feet actually start punching and strangling the people it steps on. Think of one of the victims gets stuck between two of the rambo toes. it would be getting beaten so badly. It would get so toe rambo jammed. In the upper head, there is one rambo inside that you cannot see, and its the brain rambo, it gives orders on where to walk and what to do, when he says something, all the others repeat it, and it causes a reverberation of stallone mumbles that cause them to move in muscular movements. All the teeth would be rambo heads in white bandanas, their bodies jammed tighty in the rambo gums. so when someones being eating by the ultra rambo, the last thing the person would hear before they get crushed by rambo craniums is "uhh!! uhh!", retarded but complex stallone mumbles. And the rambo digestive system is actually a bunch of arm muscles tensing the body into minced meat. this ultra rambo would literally shit out the person it ate as fleshy diahrea. But the rambo intestines would take whatever ammo the crushed body has left, and circulate the bullets to the surface, to use for one of the many machine guns the outer rambos wield.
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010101
from Vancouver (Canada) on 2007-02-16 10:38 [#02051009]
Points: 7669 Status: Regular
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Your doing shrooms again aren't you buddy?
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Gwely Mernans
from 23rd century entertainment (Canada) on 2007-02-16 10:39 [#02051010]
Points: 9856 Status: Lurker | Followup to 010101: #02051009
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No, this is just my sense of humour.
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EVOL
from a long time ago on 2007-02-16 16:48 [#02051255]
Points: 4921 Status: Lurker
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i hope that's just a draft, if i had the time right now i'd edit it myself. why? because i like it.
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swears
from junk sleep on 2007-02-16 16:54 [#02051260]
Points: 6474 Status: Lurker
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awesome
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Drunken Mastah
from OPPERKLASSESVIN!!! (Norway) on 2007-02-16 16:56 [#02051261]
Points: 35867 Status: Lurker | Show recordbag
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hahahaha!
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Gwely Mernans
from 23rd century entertainment (Canada) on 2007-02-16 17:42 [#02051292]
Points: 9856 Status: Lurker | Followup to Drunken Mastah: #02051261
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Then adriane from the rocky series gets stuck in the rambo body and getting squeezed to death, and the stallones are screaming "ADRIAAAANE!!!! ADRIAAANE!!!! HEEELP ME, I CAN'T STOP!!!"
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cx
from Norway on 2007-02-16 18:02 [#02051305]
Points: 4537 Status: Regular
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woooot!
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Feld
from surrey (Canada) on 2007-02-17 00:32 [#02051389]
Points: 89 Status: Regular
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The rambo clones within his body would all fight each other for supremacy of the higher faculties
in the superclustered rambo brain. This virtual mission with every gametype would be provided as a training sub-directive to help hone rambo skills.
Since he is so good, he trains to improve his marksmanship even while he's in a live mission with real odds. Rambo isn't perfect though, so to improve his odds in the live mission he may have to outgun other clones by joining teams -for varied times depending on the threat- to survive and get an advantage in higher risk situations. but since there's only one rambo in the live mission, it's every clone for rambo's self. so all individual rambo in training take, at times, exploitative chances to destroy even their own specific team of rambo.
the bases in his training match would primarily take place in his skull, which would actually be filled with mostly air. this environment would give the clones good range for sniping positions, teleportation pods and other covert op techniques.
the largest bases would be in the most open terrain, which would represent rambo's peformance when stripped of all equiptment/weaponry and surrounded by other clones. rambo's superclustered brain would be within the most open terrain, with only one teleportation pod known to get there, held as the ultimate weapon by the best, unbeatable rambo. this rambo is so seasoned, no other clone has ever even witnessed him move. as far as the other rambos were concerned, he might as well have been the teleportation pods themselves.
that rambo could have field day with all the other clones any day, using only his fists(and maybe -for fun- a throwing knife thrown in for good measure). this legendary rambo apparently captured all the bases using the supercluster, though some of the clones were begginning to suspect that maybe the supercluster was only a myth.
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Feld
from surrey (Canada) on 2007-02-17 00:33 [#02051391]
Points: 89 Status: Regular
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naturally, the story went that: after beating all the other clones, this legendary rambo took control of the higher falculties stored in his atrophied lip and depressed eye sacs (which was one of the features of the supercluster). only one other opponent faced this unseen master after stepping into that pod.
it's hard to believe, but, at that moment rambo actually unleashed his supercluster. anxious to at least see the weapon in action, that clone tried desperately to see, but could only catch a ghostly reflection of his elusive killers face.
from this story, some clones sometimes speculate that the aforementioned rambo must have just been an idiot who caught himself in shock during a teleport death.
game stories and conspiracies aside, what's of real value and importance is that the real rambo running the training program(who may or may not be the foretold legend is content knowing that his clones think he's just sylvester stallone, in a rich house, with a distinct history behind his deformed face; living it up in his invisible place in the game match that his warring clones cannot find while the leads the real mission at hand, beyond what we know as the corporeal.
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pigster
from melbs on 2007-02-17 00:55 [#02051394]
Points: 4480 Status: Lurker
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i want to see a movie.. or a series of movies based on the ultra rambo.
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2007-02-17 01:58 [#02051405]
Points: 21423 Status: Regular
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BUT JUST THEN the Ultra Chuck Norris Appears from behind a building, immediately karate chopping all the bullets sprayed in his direction. Agitated by his new rival, Ultra Rambo concentrates all his fire into a solid metal beam, leaving a charred gaping hole where 8 Chucks used to be in Ultra Chuck's abdomen. The chucks surrounding the hole climb inward to fill the gap, causing a chain reaction of inward movement that shrinks Ultra Chuck Norris's body a little bit. Even more pissed off than usual from the attack, all the Chucks begin taunting Ultra rambo in unison.
"mmaAAaaadrriiiannnnnMMmmnnnm!!!" all the rambos mutter in anger for running out of ammo due to the blast.
and then some other stuff happens, like something involving rambo's using their knives and charging and maybe when they collide the two twist up into a homogeneous mixture of individually battling chucks and rambos for awhile before their individual auras suck them back out into two seperate beings again.
and the building turns out to be ultra Urkle pretenting to be a building and every single Urkle says "did IIiiii do thaaaat?" in EXACT unison which is the loudest thing in the galaxy EVER and causes an enormous earthquake and melts all the cars, but as the "aaaa" vowel rings out, it is so loud that all the molecules on earth that were tranmitting the sound fly out of orbit, getting sucked to the moon from gravity.
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Combo
from Sex on 2007-02-17 03:17 [#02051409]
Points: 7538 Status: Lurker
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Rocky VI
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Gwely Mernans
from 23rd century entertainment (Canada) on 2007-02-17 11:12 [#02051591]
Points: 9856 Status: Lurker | Followup to w M w: #02051405
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The Ultra Urkel is the only known form of existence immune to such an annoying resonance, so while the Ultra Rambo and Norris are down (down being temporaily seperated), Urkel clumsily trips around, squashing individual stallones and chucks.
Final Measures must be taken, a secret organization in a huge black minimalistic room begin to talk around a table carved with their secret insignia. "Everything is going according to plan", "Yes, we have awaited this for so long", "The subhull is beginning to collapse, this is 3rd impact".
Back above ground, a single rambo stands on a heap of melted vehicles, staring at a single norris standing on some rubble (which is slightly higher than rambos platform). They stare into eachothers bloody eyes and realize what needs to be done. All the norris' and rambos run into eachother and begin to form the ultimate symbiosis, the ultra confluence, the almighty form, Norbo Rambis.
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Gwely Mernans
from 23rd century entertainment (Canada) on 2007-02-17 11:59 [#02051599]
Points: 9856 Status: Lurker
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But then the question arises, who controls the brain, norris? rambo? both? For their command functions to align, they must shed off all alpha male hostility.
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swears
from junk sleep on 2007-02-17 18:23 [#02051702]
Points: 6474 Status: Lurker | Followup to Feld: #02051389
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fav+ new member
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swears
from junk sleep on 2007-02-17 18:25 [#02051704]
Points: 6474 Status: Lurker | Followup to swears: #02051702
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Actually, he's been a member for a while, but y'know...fav+ member who doen't post that much.
These arsing around threads are great, IDM is boring anyway.
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2007-02-19 19:40 [#02052355]
Points: 21423 Status: Regular
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*crack* one of Norbo Rambis's's's insane eyes open as he awakes from his slumber. As his mighty pupil focuses, all the air in its sight turns black and falls out of the sky, too scared to be in his vision. Due to his extra mass from combining, all the clothes of the previously seperate ultra chuck and rambo were ripped off and lying on the floor, so his 50 enormous, permantly erect steel penises (peni) could be seen.
Without Norbo Rambis so much as moving a muscle, every male within a 50 block radius dehydrated into a pile of guk and bones and every female was instantly impregnated with septuplets (all male who would grow up with herculean strength).
Back underground in the Undecagon (a secret version of the pentagon) where they were safe from the testosterone waves, Don Fernando McPeanutbutter, the leader of Team 'F', pushed the button that controlled the microchips in every one of Norbo Rambis's's's's individual bodies. "It worked, the half microchips we secretly implanted in the Rambos combined with the half microchips in the Chuck Norrises!", said the peanut butter sandwich that Don Fernando McPeanutbutter used to communicate with since he was just some eyes and ears and a brain floating in a jar and had no mouth to speak with himself. "Now we have the ultimate weapon on earth. With luck we can use it to defend humanity from Ziggle Zopius, the evil alien from Galaxy 99999999999999993 who will be attacking shortly!"
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2007-02-19 19:44 [#02052356]
Points: 21423 Status: Regular
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Well, obviously Don Fernando had his peanut butter sandwich push the button, pff, because, pff, I mean he didn't have any hands like I said, pff.
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Gwely Mernans
from 23rd century entertainment (Canada) on 2007-02-19 20:55 [#02052365]
Points: 9856 Status: Lurker
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I think cygnus should make the theme song for ziggle zopius' arrival.
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Gwely Mernans
from 23rd century entertainment (Canada) on 2007-02-19 21:04 [#02052368]
Points: 9856 Status: Lurker | Followup to Feld: #02051391
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If what we're talking about is lets say, metal gear solid, you've just described metal gear solid 2.
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2007-02-19 21:15 [#02052370]
Points: 21423 Status: Regular
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iwanttodie
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2007-02-19 21:16 [#02052371]
Points: 21423 Status: Regular
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i like to watch pornotube videos and talk to my mom on the phone simultaneously
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2007-02-19 21:19 [#02052373]
Points: 21423 Status: Regular
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My soul is made of cottage cheese.
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ijonspeches
from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2007-02-20 07:22 [#02052491]
Points: 7841 Status: Lurker | Show recordbag
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"aki ra mbo"
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swears
from junk sleep on 2007-06-07 15:17 [#02091381]
Points: 6474 Status: Lurker
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bump
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marlowe
from Antarctica on 2007-06-07 15:19 [#02091383]
Points: 24578 Status: Lurker
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There are too many Long Posts in this thread. Therefore, I didn't read any. Thanks a bunch!
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2007-06-07 15:26 [#02091385]
Points: 21423 Status: Regular | Followup to marlowe: #02091383
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That cut me deep, man. I spent the past hours of my life on this.. *weeps*
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marlowe
from Antarctica on 2007-06-07 15:40 [#02091388]
Points: 24578 Status: Lurker | Followup to w M w: #02091385
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You filching piece of shit!!
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jkd
from Twitch City (Canada) on 2007-06-07 15:44 [#02091390]
Points: 1138 Status: Lurker
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This thread is highly entertaining.
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Fah
from Netherlands, The on 2007-06-07 16:21 [#02091404]
Points: 6428 Status: Regular
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i lolled atleast once
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gyroscope
on 2007-06-08 15:47 [#02091752]
Points: 896 Status: Regular
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Rambo is already pretty Ultra.
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oscillik
from the fires of orc on 2011-01-27 04:12 [#02404756]
Points: 7746 Status: Regular
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just saw the trailer for this film, pretty fucking hilarious anyways but at about 6mins30secs they have [b]blatantly[/b] ripped off this thread
Enthiran
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Gwely Mernans
from 23rd century entertainment (Canada) on 2011-01-27 04:18 [#02404757]
Points: 9856 Status: Lurker
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Where is my money? There's royalties in this! Coincidence? I think not.
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oscillik
from the fires of orc on 2011-01-27 04:20 [#02404758]
Points: 7746 Status: Regular | Followup to Gwely Mernans: #02404757
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fucking for real man, you should sue
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jnasato
from 777gogogo (Japan) on 2011-01-27 09:05 [#02404761]
Points: 3393 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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This is a good thread.
+
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