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 Now online (1)Roger Wilco ...and 74 guests Last 5 registered Oplandisks nothingstar N_loop yipe foxtrotromeo Browse members... |
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Members 8025Messages 2609418 Today 13 Topics 127256 |
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hy do women always need to go to the toilet just as your leaving the house! i.e. my girlfriend shouts up the stairs "DINGLE BERRY cmon lets go!" so i rush around like a dick and get my shit together then as were about to step out the door its "oooh i better go before we leave!" |
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and then theres always a que at the resturant. |
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Why do women wear make up and perfume? |
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Because they are ugly and they stink. |
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thats a bit harsh! bitches rule! that last derrogatory term was supposedley comedy! |
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I know EXACTLY! what you mean dingle berry! the same is with my girlfreind. It really pisses me off, especialy when SHE's the one who's telling me to hurry the hell up! |
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It gets even worse when they are pregnant. |
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your name, inverted whale and avatar made me laugh in a strange sick way ive never laughed before. thanks man! |
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What do you say to a woman with a career? |
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Big Mac and Large fries please. |
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No problemo! Glad to be of service. |
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01010101---YOU ALWAYS MAKE ME LAUGH...............YOU FUNNY FUCKER.. |
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eyeliner and mascara and lipstick are all very understood...but foundation make-up is gross...it just makes them look like they're hiding something...like scars and warts and pimples and third eyes and what not |
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Foundation only looks bad when it is used to cover up blemishes. It is intended to even out the whole tone of the face and when used correctly you should only be able to see it if you lick your finger and ruin it down a woman's cheek. |
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hmmm...i wish i had a girlfriend... |
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hev.. i thought your right hand was your girlfriend? .....................joking buddy. |
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hey, i'm left handed... no offence would be taken anyway. |
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hevquip are you hidiously ugly? If not, I think I might have a plan. |
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0101010 are you goin go hook-up with hev.? ahhhhhh how cute. |
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why would anyone pull out there eyebrows just to draw them back on again? |
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no, i'm not hideously ugly. i've heard that i'm rather "attractive" from girls. i don't see it though. perhaps it's because girls don't know anything most of the time? |
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Join an aerobics class Hevquip it is the best place to meet women, get fit and also spend an hour a week in a room full of lycra clad women. It works!!! |
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oh man, aerobics class...no thank you. i think i'll continue being shy and quiet and wait for the just OH SO many girls to come rushing up to me. |
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hev....stay in yor moms basement...that the place i meet the ladies.... or...start a conversation with an attractive lady at the grocery store (make sure she does NOT have a ring on her left hand, second finger) |
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Another great technique is going to a contempory dance class. These things do work. |
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hev.....age? dont do the "bar thing"...thats where all the hoes are at...how retarded..... |
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A greater mystery is why women always go to the toilet in pairs :P |
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Place a classified advert in the news paper: "Hansome millionare (20) would like to meet ugly boring women" |
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And when men do it, they are called gay by thier mates. Why can't i go to a public rest-room with a dear friend in peace? O woe is me. |
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i'm 19. i'm not outgoing at all either. |
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hmmmmmmm....you need to be a little outgoing my friend.........work on it ok? |
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They do it to talk about men on the dancefloor apparently. |
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women go into restrooms together at clubs to do drugs too... yeh Hevquip, just turn on the "outgoing switch", and all your problems will be solved... just put on a plastic fake smile and talk a bunch of plastic nonsense and cliches, its that easy! quit being so stupid! why are you so stupid? be cool and outgoing just like everybody else instead! just be somebody completely different! ...(its called sarcasm... ) ... just try to be like REFLEX, he is so fun loving and happy and only likes cool things cause he is so cool! |
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heheh...your girlfriend calls you dingle berry? hmmm....i can only imagine where that comes from.. ;) |
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As previously revealed on this very messageboard, his real name is Barry Dangle. |
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women are the complex creatures of the universe that shall never be understood nor fixable |
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the problem though, ubik, is that i hate all the fake, plastic things. |
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what are women? |
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a fascinating conundrum. |
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because they are made differently. |
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I find most women just dont have a clue when it comes to what they want form relationships. They want some fantasy that they dont even understand themselves. Ive found one of the best ways to make a girl attracted tom you is to totally ignore her in front of other people and even a little obnoxious, she will then start to want you because she thinks she will never get you, then sloooowly you start being nice. Its worked for me a few times anyway. (only bad side effect is it also works on people you dont like, in that case just keep ignoring them.) |
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waah, bad proofreading ah well. |
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hmm... i never understood: my girlfriend go to the toilet, BUT NOT ALONE, everytime at a party or else she goes with a friend to the toilet, put makeup on her face and so on... what the .. ? can't she do that alone ... ? girls need somebody to talk when they are making up, next time i go with her gg. |
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The thing that took me too long to realise is that women enjoy sex as much as men. They are not letting you do it!!! |
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Ever see "The Tao of Steve"? Its the bible man! |
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Because.... Men either want: 1. Sex and thats it 2. Love and attachment 3. To Feel Grown up and have a lasting relationship. Women want: 1. ????????????? No I guess I shouldnt say that, men always talk about what women want, and say they dont know, but I mean we are two totally different types of people.. humans...... DIFFERENT! And we cannot be the other, or vice versa so we will never REALLY know for ourselves. I think women do have a harder time dealing with their partners about love, lust and such things, but then again so do guys. And come on, ofcourse guys think about sex a lot, but so do girls, and even if we do more, we cant really help it and wouldnt want to if we could, but also that doesnt mean we are not capable of love, or caring..... for someone, far from it. |
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men is simple. women is difficult, stand over 10minutes per day at the mirror and so on.... |
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Look at what I wrote. I think any man, trying to actually discuss what women want and saying "I dont know" or "???" i meaningless and stupid. I mean...... its just cause we arent a woman that we dont know what they want. Women usually only know what men want because of stereotypes or we let them know in the first place. Whether it be sex, or love or what... |
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"tao of steve" the guy in that movie lives in a town nearby me. he has an article in a free newspaper you can pick up around the state. |
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REFLEX, believe it or not, but the most womens want sex too.. in a diffrent way than the most mans |
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