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 (nobody)...and 137 guests Last 5 registered Oplandisks nothingstar N_loop yipe foxtrotromeo Browse members... |
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Members 8025Messages 2614205 Today 9 Topics 127548 |
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*Dons breeches and climbs atop Daisy, his thoroughbreed* Come, Alex, let us depart from the Residence and plunge throught the inky night along highways and byways until every last ignoramus and imbecile is hunted down and slain! *puffs on his brer pipe* Avanti, Daisy! Let us jump this topiared-hedge and be off into the darkness! |
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can i destroy this one too ? |
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Nooo, get back to threatening fisticuffs back at the fireside! :S |
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(paints blood of lamb on door) |
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Forward, Trafalgar! The moon reflects beautifully off your white glossy coat, this must be a fortunate omen. Let us advance, Paul and show these.. plebeians what they really are worth! |
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Sorry sir, this road is closed, you'll have to travel south for 10 miles and take a left at Dead-mans ravine. *gives hand gesture in direction* |
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im equipped right now, they have fleed out of the battlefield. and the sword demands blood |
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AH! Who is that unfortunate fellow over there, painting some kind of crude depiction of an act of fornication on a door? I will have at him! |
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said John The Softinger ...and they have ride..one on another, in the moon |
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*trips Hyakusen and makes him fall in the dirt* |
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youre so wrong ( whispered from behind ) |
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*puffs on his pipe and ponders his messageboard suggestion* Advance, dear Daisy! We have and Alien Life Form to leap over who dares to attempt a highway blockage! The dogs have picked up the scent of a rather dopey Xltronician who must be stomped and beaten to death with a leather and willow riding stick! |
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A prole hunt....aahhh...fair makes my breeches strain...egad! I must disrobe and let the muse of destruction freely enter my kundalini. Where is my battlepaint and blunderbuss? |
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I might have to correct you at this point, Paul.. painfully beaten to bloody death etcetera etcetera etcetera. Can I offer you a thimble of scotch? Steady Trafalgar, steady, this scotch is of the very best quality.. |
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Aha! Alex, dear friend, this is the very reason that I cherish you! You are so practical - it was remiss of me to fail to make the beatings painful. Once more, you play the trump like a true gentleman of distinguishment! *scoops the thimbleful of scotch* Excellent! Sine Qua Non! Let us Proceed! |
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Oh what jolly good fun, enjoy yourself on your obvious detour through the woods gay boys. |
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oh good point, sir Lee! We must pummel the Woods gay boys to death while we're at it. Overt homosexuality can't be tolerated. |
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Ah the balance of spite! |
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*goes to uzim's house* |
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Sir, you aware that that place of residence is in France..? *rebalances the weight of his pummeling-stick in his hand* |
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What about the one that is called.. let me have a look.. horsefactory. He looks like a fine chap, but his face seems, well.. pretty daft. |
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Well, I have found this lovely brook which is so soothing that it is sending me to sleep! Fear not, good Alex, I will awake refreshened in a few hours and will be able to rejoin the hunt full of fettle and joyous spirit! Carry on the good fight! |
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Look, I have found this photograph of sir Fleetmouse! |
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cute |
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*Springs awake to find a sheep licking his face* What ho! What ho! I am invigorated by awakening to a glorioius late spring morn! The sun is bathing my body with sparklingly delightful warm rays! *Lights brer pipe* Now, 'tis time to mount Daisy, and be gone to the woods, where I've heard rumour of several Xltronicians who are of less than average wit and humour! |
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ho hum, stranger. this obscure neck of the woods is called home by us outlanders. watch where ye thread, for ferocious critters prowls the dense growth, under tall and brooding trees that admit no light. |
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*spots happy cycling running feral-like through the trees and ferns* Stop, you bounder! I demand that you give yourself up immediately, so that you may be humanely dispensed with, and your carcass dropped off at Wat'mmania! |
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Stay your hand. This one belongs to me; thought it so wise to abscond from my most bonhomous ownership. |
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Carry on, Master Mappa, you have the privilege of hounding this poor sap to his grave. |
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I need a crap. In the lonely dark woods or whatever. got toilet paper? |
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You'll have to be Pictish, and use some Dock Leaves, which are in abundance in this particular copse! |
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Might I add that using these Dock Leaves might slightly irritate the orifice they clean, giving you a pleasant feeling of tintillation throughout the day. It's a rather spectacular, I might add. It turns sitting down into a whole new experience. |
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href="http://www.uploadimages.net/images/906589Dock-leaves- a L.jpg" target=blank>is this what the whole thing looks like now?< |
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oh shit bollocks. thats one lazyyyyy link. |
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mmm. |
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oh god the link dosent even work! SORRY. i ruined this thread. im going now. im stupid and useless. shot me when you find paradise beyond the crystal lakes of quantis. |
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Remember, dear stilaktive, if you err, just smile and carry on! A valuable lesson my pianoforte teacher tought me! For more posterior pleasure, do the splits for the thirty seconds; the feeling that shoots up from your alimentary exit afterwards is sheer bliss! |
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Oh, sir, you are so right! Another astonishing technique is toying with the speed you use to clean the hind-section. Try starting slow, and move the speed up a notch when it starts to work. Always end slowly, for the third-degree burns that might occur take a long time to heal. Gradually allow the heat to escape from the circular muscle. |
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Gosh yes! Bally good show, Clem! The Anal Rim Massage is a fine technique, employed in the East Indies Regiment of Her Majesty's Army! |
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It looks like it's going to rain, what what? |
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I could really go for some sex pie, I tell you. |
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haha...yeah that would go down nice with a bukkake cocktail. |
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*Falls into the river after drinking one too many nips from his hip-flask* Oh I say! What jolly rotten form to have drenched myself in such a manner! I have no doubt that one of those sub-average hoi-polloi pondscum fellows took a pot shot at me with some variant of a peashooter or pocket-catapault! I must strongly protest at such insubordination! |
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What ho! The dirty scoundrels! This really is very unsportsmanlike! Having a river right there, there really is no need AT ALL, is there. I believe sir Fleetmouse makes an excellent sex pie - warms up the constitution a treat. |
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Yes, I've heard he is most proficient at providing the Berkshire Hunt! :D |
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Oh Paul, could you be a dear and hold down epohs while I kick the living shit out of him? He's struggling a tad and I would get very miffed if my new sheepsleather huntingboots get splattered with this sad little man's blood. |
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*Sticks pipe in between his teeth and pins Epohs down as he pinned down an upstart heffer in the high fields Spring last* Kick away, dear boy! May I suggest a few kicks right below the centre of the ribs? A most effective mode of immobilisation! |
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what in ian noll's name is going on ere? *is bewildered* |
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The Fireside Chat thread came first - check that one out first! Although that thread stemmed from a suggestion I made in Lee's thread complaining about shitness on XLT :) |
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I quite like it! Good show ol chap! |
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