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 Now online (1)dariusgriffin ...and 345 guests Last 5 registered Oplandisks nothingstar N_loop yipe foxtrotromeo Browse members... |
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This phenomenon has haunted me for most of my life. Mystery cuts are those which appear on your hands with no indication of how they got there. For example, I just looked at my hand and saw that a small cut of about 1cm length was bleeding, but I feel no pain. The cut is obviously not very deep but it is still a complete mystery. Where did it come from? Why can't I feel the pain? Am I becoming invinicible? If so, why? If not, why not? |
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these cuts are a well-known phenomenon, and are inflicted by tiny crystallic creatures known only as "headphonos." They are a small nano-race, which drifts aimlessly through time and space. Occasionally, mostly during star-trek conventions, they will gather all their energy up to a sinlge burst of joy which results in pregnancy for the females of the species. The females then, after having been pregnant for three seconds, ejaculate the kids at amazing speed. Sometimes, these offspring hit people and cut them. Fortunately, the outside of the headphonos is coated with anaestethic. |
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That explains the cotton wool, but what about the parallelogram? |
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They are stigmata but from a different god who was killed to death with papercuts. |
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the parallelogram is a result of a galactic conspiracy born three thousand years ago. but to make a long story short, they all died, and we were left with the paralellogram without realizing its true potential. |
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killed to death? |
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haha! |
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I was entering into the spirit of a horsefactory thread :D |
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you can catch fire out off nothing 2 |
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WOOOW! |
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Did you know that pooring water on someone who has spontaniously combusted only makes them burn quicker. It is due to the rapid release of hydrogen gas from the water...something that only happens in rediculously high levels of heat. So never poor water on the spontaniously combusting. |
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pour water |
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What should you pour on them then? Fire? |
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hot oil. |
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:D The effect is the same as what happens when aircraft are on fire due to the materials used in the airframe. You have to use foam instead. |
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Or just smother the flames. I learnt all this when I had to give a health and safety speech in university. Most people did general office stuff I did SponCom :D |
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OK! Doing it now. Nope, I'm still on fire. What can I do next? |
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Have your girlfriend piss on you... you will probably still die but it is something you HAVE to experience before you die. |
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Haha sweet, wouldn't it be funny if there was a guy walking down the street and he was like "I Sure hope I don't spontaneously combust right about now". Then he dies!!!!!!! Also he is gay. |
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I don't wish and harm on promo. |
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Yes I agree 100%.!.!? |
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you're a strange horsefactory |
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No, just suffering from sleep deprivation |
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I think you eat to much sugar lumbs |
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Curse those blasted lumbs. |
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This thread made me laugh and i really needed that! |
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