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 Now online (1)recycle ...and 324 guests Last 5 registered Oplandisks nothingstar N_loop yipe foxtrotromeo Browse members... |
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Members 8025Messages 2614106 Today 3 Topics 127542 |
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Louis: Why did they put you as president? Peter: Maybe it's because i can say all 50 states in a quater of a second...YAH Louis: Peter, that was just a loud yelping noise |
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Peter Griffin: Brian, there's a message in my Alpha Bits. It says "OOOOOO"! Brian Griffin: Peter, those are Cheerios. |
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:0) i remeber that one from when i was chattin' to you the other night. Mr Weed: Peter, i thought your family were involved in a plane crash? Peter: Yeah about that plane crash i told you about...turned out to be gas. |
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Peter: Listen, i dont pay you to sit around and tell me what to do. in fact i dont pay you at all! coun' it! |
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*Rocket comes through quagmires ceiling, turns to his current lady* "To answer your question, that big!" Alllright |
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Great show. I have no quotes though, Sorry. |
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Quagmire talking to girl in bar: Q: I bet youre a libra? *girl punches him* Q: I KNOW youre not a virgo! *girl punches him, and he falls on the ground* Q: Well, from down here, you look like a pisces! *Child Welfare woman asking quagmire about the griffens* Q: Theyre a bunch of card carrying communists! heh, alriiightt-wait no No! Its NOT alright! *Quagmire knocks on door of girls house* *Girl answers* Q: Hey there, how old are you? Girl: 16 Q: 18? Youre first! Girl: MOM!!!!! *Quagmire walks into the bathroom at a highschool baseketball game and sees a cheerleader all tied up in one of the stalls* Q: *Shocked look on face* Dear Diary... Jackpot! Heh, Alriiiight. more later... |
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Peter: "heh heh heh heh." |
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Salty the sailor: Now you must leave Peter: Why? Salty the sailor: Because if people find out about me, questions will be starting to be asked. Like how a man with no egineering background could build a sophisticated talking fish robot. |
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q: who wants to play drink the beer? p*gulps* q:you've won! p:what'd i win? q:another beer! |
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hahah or *Peter and Loise drinking beer with kids at a house party* Peter: Man, youre drinking games are nothing like when I was growing up. *Flashback* *Kid takes a hammer and beats peters hand till its mangled* Kid: Haha! You drink! *Peter drinks* |
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Stewie Griffin: Damn you, broccoli! |
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q: hey, chris. c: hey, qua... q: hey, megg. 18 yet? m: no not yet... q: heh, alright. *walks away* |
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Stewie: You know mother, if this bannana pudding had, perhaps vanilla waffers or something, it would be passable, but as it stands, its just another one of your culinary abooortions! *throws it* NOW CLEAN IT UP! |
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Stewie Griffin: [After Lois tries to feed Stewie his broccoli "airplane style"] Damn you, Damn the Broccoli, and Damn the Wright Brothers! |
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"oh hey look, theres bill nye the science guy! and half of Lenny Kravitz! ... optimus prime is Jewish!??" |
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Stewy: I've often fanatsized about what this house would be like with more culture *goes to Peter, Chris, Brian and Stewy dressed in Victorian clothes with top hats* Stwey: The port is quite good Peter: Good indeed Brian: Very good Chris: What year is it? Stewy: 1862 Peter: Ahh good Brian: Agreed *Peter goes up in flames* Peter: Oh dear Brian: What's that? Peter: I've spontainously combusted Stewy: Oh i am sorry Peter: no it's all right i had grown tierd of living Chris: all for the best then |
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its not a quote, but the entire peter vs the chicken was amazing |
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[Peter is trying to potty-train Stewie] Peter Griffin: You know, I oughta just give you some beer. Goes straight through you. Stewie Griffin: [sarcastic] Wonderful! And while we're at it, we can light up a doobie and watch porn! Peter Griffin: Eh...yeah? |
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*Familys in the car, and the kids are fighting* Peter: Oh lois, kids fight is as natural as a whitemans dialouge in a spike lee movie. *cuts to a black guy ordering pizza from a white guy* Black guy: Hey, can I get a slice of pepperoni? White guy: SNARL RAR *Foams at mouth* *Growling* |
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"the" |
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*Stewies in a foster home with other children, who are racially diverse* *all the kids say hello in their language, and the african one goes "click click stu click e" *then later, stewie is going into withdrawl from lack of pancakes, and is screaming at the family for pancakes* Stewie: I WANT PANCAKES! YO QUIERO PANCAKES! CLICK CLICK BLOODY CLICK PANCAKES! |
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lmao =oD |
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Stewie Griffin: Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but you're a total bitch. |
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peter: i got involved with drugs when i was your age. but things got too real. :flashback to life sized paper mache peter sitting on a park bench: peter: I AM FREAKIN OUT |
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Zeus that was hillarious |
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*I actually laughed down the phone to a customer when I read this one =oD* Peter Griffin: Holy crip, he's a crapple! |
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Incase you don't know |
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lol |
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Hmm...like The Simpsons movie, i don't know whether i approve :s Would be kinda cool though |
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yeah, but look at the South Park movie !! That was awesome |
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Yes true, i'll keep shtum |
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Stewie: Its not so much that I want her dead. I just don't want her to be...alive......anymore. |
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Stewie Griffin: Oh, I must give you my e-mail address. It's loismustdie, all one word, @yahoo.com. |
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Remember, guns don't kill people. Dangerous minorities do. |
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"ok heres what im thinking, i'm charlie, and you're all my angels.... ...except you... ...you can be Bosley." |
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damn.. brother done kissed his mama! |
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"thanks for looking after the house for us Mr Swanson" "i might as well, im melted to the ground..." "here, these ought'a keep the rats away" "thanks kids, stay in school" *enter huge fuck off rat* "BRING IT OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON" |
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"i dont have to fucking impress you" |
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Peter: "Yo Lois, have you seen my underwear?" Lois: " You mean the one with the hole in left buttcheek from when you had the trots on the plane and you stepped on it when you we're pulling them back up in the stall?" Peter: "No, the one from that Palm Sunday when I had really bad gas but I didn't want to offend Jesus so I waited until after mass and let it rip in the confession booth and it sounded like Louis Armstrong." Lois: "Bottom left drawer." |
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Family in a grocery store Brian pees on the floor at the checkout counter Peter : Where do you think you are!? Payless!? |
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Everyone has posted some great quotes here. Especially Anus for "the". Peter narrates his own play: "It is a grim future, with lots of explosions and partial nudity." |
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Peter ends up in hell... Pete: Superman? What are you doing down here? Superman: I was with a prostitute and she made a crack about me being faster then a speeding bullet, so i ripped her in half |
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Cleveland has one of the best voices ever: "Oh Petah... that tickles me in a way, that if Loretta tickled me in that way... I'd say, 'oh yeah... thats niiice..." |
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Tom Tucker: "I'm sorry everyone. I lied about the final ticket being found so that everyone would stop looking for it. Now as an act of contrition, I will insert this carniverous earwig into my head... (puts the carniverous bug into his ear) ... huh, thats funny... it kind of tickles... (takes deep breath) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH OH GOD ITS EATING OUT THE BACK OF MY EYES!!!" Dianne Simmons: "Recent studies show that chocolate may actually be good for you." |
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And how bout when Mayor Adam West tried to gain superpowers by rolling in toxic waste... Doctor: "Mayor West... you have lymphoma." Mayor: "Oh my." Doctor: "What we're you trying to accomplish rolling around in that toxic waste?" Mayor: " I was trying to gain superpowers." Doctor: "Why thats just silly." Mayor: "Silly... yes. Idiotic... yes." |
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Peter: "Hi. I'd like 3 cheeseburgers, a chocolate milkshake..." Lois: "PETER! My sister is having a baby!" Peter: "Oh yeah... and one kids meal... Does anyone want fries? Because I dont want to be the only one eating them... otherwise I'll feel like a fatty." |
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man, Mayor West is so funny. "Someone is stealing all the water!!" *pours some into plant pot, soil absorbs* |
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Mayor: "Well according to this map, your not a part of this city. You're not even part of these United States! .... which would make you A COMMUNIST!" Peter: " AHHH!" Mayor: "AHHH!" (pushes button) (Peter falls halfway into a trapdoor, but is stuck) Mayor: "Hmmm... Usually my malcontents are thinner. Would you mind comming back when I have my fat malcontent door installed?" Peter: "No! I've had it up to here with you and the whole damn system." (Mayor West steps on Peter until he squeezes through the door) Mayor: "Ahhh... I love this job more than I love taffy... and I'm a man who enjoys his taffy...mmmm...." (chews taffy for 5 minutes making noises similar to orgasming) |
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Peter: "I'm not drunk, I'm just exhausted from drinking all night." |
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