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 Now online (3)dariusgriffin big recycle ...and 134 guests Last 5 registered Oplandisks nothingstar N_loop yipe foxtrotromeo Browse members... |
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it's always the same with holidays... all the time during school period, i can't wait for them, and when i'm in holidays finally it's only like a simple return to normality to me. and i'm not that happy about it. desillusion always... almost any kind of hope brings some desillusion... and everything seems dark in some way around me. who gets persecuted by their ex-"lovers", who comes back from school in tears and don't want to tell why, who hasn't got any christmas or are lonely or for any other reason, while society's still "xmas happy happy joy joy for everyone" attitude, who just cares about january exams (my mother, for example...), who is depressed for any other reason... and i'm getting paranoid for i see how easy it is for some people to spoil other people's life. it's so easy, and almost nothing can be done about it. saying "just ignore those who persecute you" to these people is stupid and even egoistic. and you've got to care about it, so you get depressed as well. damn... i wish i was alone at home... i need to get in a "secondary" state of mind by any means if i don't want to get depressed (music doesn't quite work for this)... -_- |
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i don't like the way my mam had and still does have morre powerrover me than she thinks. she shoots opinion arround like no mans buisness and doesn't rrealise that what she says effects my descisions wetherr they arre good forr me orr not. a little comment off herr can make all the differrence, but she doesn't get that. |
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almost anything can effect me/hurt me/influencate me greatly... ' _ ' |
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