I cried yesterday :*( | xltronic messageboard
 
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I cried yesterday :*(
 

offline EVOL from a long time ago on 2002-05-06 19:51 [#00208209]
Points: 4921 Status: Lurker



HOLY FUCK! MY LIFE IS SO SHIT!

most important is that i'm moving to vegas on the 9th. i'm
moving there with a friend because once again i have no
place to live and he offered to help me out. that is very
cool of him.

the person i was living with for about 3 1/2 months was
renting his house and the owners sold it so he had to move
and was like you owe me $600. all i have is $400 i would
like to compensate him somehow but i can't. he said if i
didn't pay him he would hunt me down and kill me, seriously.
the reason i can't afford to pay him is i just started a
job only for a month now and because of him i can't work
there anymore becuase i have no car or savings that i can
stay in the area to work. that's why i move to vegas with
my friend kirk who got me the job in the first place.

i'm so behind because i was in a car accident after my dad
kicked me out last year for taking a job with less pay just
so i could keep my piercings. i had just gotten out of debt
and didn't have any car insurance so i went to jail over the
summer and i couldn't get a fucking job on my own becuase of
my new criminal record.

now i found out that i have to either pay $400 to the orange
county sheriffs for a fix it ticket from two years ago that
i thought had already fixed itself or go to jail again
because i now have a warrant out for my arrest.

besides that the other night i met two way fucking cool
grrlz one of wich was in the porn industry we got drunk and
high together and i still couldn't seal the deal.

so i cried, alot. everything just kinda built up inside me
and because of the alcohol and downers i couldn't hold it
together any longer and just let it all pour out. mainly i
was so sad because myself wanted to kill me and i didn't
care anymore.


 

offline xlr from Boston (United States) on 2002-05-06 19:54 [#00208218]
Points: 4904 Status: Regular



sorry to hear that man. I hope things get better for ya.


 

offline marlowe from Antarctica on 2002-05-06 19:54 [#00208219]
Points: 24578 Status: Lurker



wow i'm sorry to hear of your troubles evol :(


 

offline nanotech from Sukavasti Amitaba Pureland (United States) on 2002-05-06 19:55 [#00208220]
Points: 3727 Status: Regular



i'm in the same fixes...over 2k inthe hole...and had the
same shit happen to me...but once you hit bottom...there's
no lower you can go...and it's all in the
mind...serously...it's all in the mind...

you might want to look into the military...if you can do
jail...the military is cakewalk...


 

offline B3n from Manchester (United Kingdom) on 2002-05-06 20:01 [#00208234]
Points: 4700 Status: Lurker



just let it all out man


 

offline EVOL from a long time ago on 2002-05-06 20:02 [#00208239]
Points: 4921 Status: Lurker



thanks all.

every time i hit bottom, the bottom drops out, again and
again. it's all def a fucking mind trip. no one can tell
any of this about me when they meet me i hold it in and push
it back. i'm good at blocking bullshit out but it's not
healthy.


 

offline CORTEX from Canada on 2002-05-06 20:03 [#00208241]
Points: 3346 Status: Regular



get away and start over. things will calm down.


 

offline Ceri JC from Jefferson City (United States) on 2002-05-06 20:04 [#00208246]
Points: 23533 Status: Moderator | Show recordbag



Oh man, hope you get it together. Hopefully things'll
improve with time, it can't stay bad forever...


 

offline EVOL from a long time ago on 2002-05-06 20:15 [#00208280]
Points: 4921 Status: Lurker



thanks again.

it's almost as i foresaw all this coming, when i graduated i
wanted to move to australia before any of this shit went
down. that is still my ultimate goal. vegas should be
chill to save up and take care of everything untill i can
leave.

i looked into the military but i can't get in because of
probation for another 3 years.

this too shall pass but then what is there to look forward
to? i don't wanna live my life just going through the
motions.

if i look at my dads life it never ends but then those are
all the choices we make in our own lives. he just told me
that he found out he has cancer of the liver for a couple of
months now. he's only 42. he didn't take care of his body
and now this might kill him. hopefully they spotted it
early and can beat it, but that wont be the end he'll get
something else somewhere else and eventually he wont be able
to keep beating it everytime. i realize that is life i just
don't kow if i want to go throught all the shit and go out
like that or just fuckin' see it through and be glad when
i'm gone.


 

offline supreme from Antwerp (Belgium) on 2002-05-06 20:41 [#00208312]
Points: 5444 Status: Regular



I'm sorry to hear this....

I hope things will be getting better....


 

offline EVOL from a long time ago on 2002-05-06 20:44 [#00208313]
Points: 4921 Status: Lurker | Followup to supreme: #00208312



thank you kind sir!


 


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