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What can I do for you?
 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-02 22:58 [#02641582]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular



Let me know what you need, short of what everyone needs
(money, cause I have about negative 7,000usd).

What do you need.


 

online recycle from Where is Phobiazero (Lincoln) (United States) on 2025-03-02 23:12 [#02641584]
Points: 40575 Status: Regular



Hello, can you get rid of my counties psychotic leaders in
office right now?


 

online recycle from Where is Phobiazero (Lincoln) (United States) on 2025-03-02 23:13 [#02641585]
Points: 40575 Status: Regular



Oh and money, just more debt.
It’s okay


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-02 23:23 [#02641587]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular



ok recycle I think I can help you out here.

Here's what we'll do. You install a program called "Steam."
It holds all your video games. You're gonna play a game
called "Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind." It costs around 15
bucks. I'm sorry, but you'll have to foot this bill.

You'll play through the campaign and most side quests and
read all in game books (were looking at 150 hours to 200
hours of playtime). You'll roleplay pretty hard, and by that
I mean if your character is nice and helpful, you won't be
joining the assassins guild in the same playthrough. That
just wouldn't make any sense, see. When you're finished,
you report back, and I suspect most of your problems will be
solved.

Was this helpful? y/n


 

online recycle from Where is Phobiazero (Lincoln) (United States) on 2025-03-02 23:34 [#02641588]
Points: 40575 Status: Regular



idk


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2025-03-03 07:24 [#02641593]
Points: 25466 Status: Lurker



beowulf marble supercomputer 9000


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2025-03-03 08:20 [#02641594]
Points: 7966 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



part of the skate group im in wishes to skate today, but no
one with a key has answered the call to open the doors so
far. can you open them for us?
also could you please see to that every one on this planet
destroys their weapons (without hurting anybody).
that´d be super great also and make skating much more fun.
thx in advance!!


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-03 09:09 [#02641595]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02641593



ok epic I think I can help you out here.

Here's what we'll do. You install a program called "Steam."
It holds all your video games. You're gonna play a game
called "PC Building Simulator." It on sale at this very
moment for 5
bucks. I'm sorry, but you'll have to foot this bill.

You'll assemble the PC of your dreams, as long as your
dreams are centered around building a PC before 2021 which
is around when PC Building Simulator 2 came out and it
stopped updating. I suspect most of your problems will be
solved.

Was this helpful? y/n


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-03 09:12 [#02641596]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular



ok ijon I think I can help you out here.

Here's what we'll do. You install a program called "Steam."
It holds all your video games. You're gonna play a game
called "Tony Hawk Pro Skater 1 + 2." It costs around 40
bucks. I'm sorry, but you'll have to foot this bill.

I bet it will go on sale tomorrow, because Tony Hawk 3 + 4
is expected to be announced tomorrow, and sometimes they put
on a little sale with an announcement. In this game you will
have unlimited access to a skate park, and no one will own
any weapons.

Was this helpful? y/n


 

offline dariusgriffin from cool on 2025-03-03 10:59 [#02641597]
Points: 12507 Status: Regular



I've played 916 hours of Tactical Nexus in the last six
months, what should I do?


 

online recycle from Where is Phobiazero (Lincoln) (United States) on 2025-03-03 14:02 [#02641599]
Points: 40575 Status: Regular



Mr. Wolfslice, I feel like you are trying to help but asking
the Magic 8 Ball 🎱 may not be the way to solve all of the
earth's problems.

Was this helpful? y/n


 

offline mohamed from the turtle business on 2025-03-03 16:09 [#02641604]
Points: 31353 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



sorry to hear about your negative mate


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-03 21:12 [#02641620]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular



thanks mo'. It used to be negative 24k usd but I paid down a
lot living pretty frugally the last couple years. I will
also get some inheritance from my grandparent's estate when
it sells (grandma passed away at 98 in jan). I'll be in
decent shape... well decent enough that I can invest a bit,
and take my first vacation in 10 years while still working.

darius advice: Watch the On Cinema At The Cinema Oscar
Special! I haven't yet, but I bought my ticket and will
watch tonight or tomorrow.

recycle advice: respect the 8-ball. Watch the seinfeld
episode "The Reverse Peephole" in which Puddy proudly
displays his 8 ball jacket.
You got a question? You ask the 8 ball.


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-03 22:30 [#02641623]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular



also advice for everyone

sean booth from autechre posted (on his "mastadon") some 303
acid in celebration of it being 3-03 as a date.

sean booth acid., from today.

as previously mentioned, tony hawk 3 + 4 will be announced
on 3/4 (also date based, cheeky), as we american's date it.
top of my steam wishlist it goes.


 

offline dariusgriffin from cool on 2025-03-03 22:44 [#02641624]
Points: 12507 Status: Regular | Followup to Wolfslice: #02641620



Thank you. I am subscribed to the HEI Network of course,
though I am not at home right now. I can't wait!


 

offline earthleakage from tell the world you're winning on 2025-03-04 00:35 [#02641629]
Points: 27827 Status: Addict



caroline wozniacki please


 

offline Roger Wilco from Mo's Beans on 2025-03-04 10:27 [#02641635]
Points: 2146 Status: Lurker



I would appreciate your unwavering support.


 

offline mermaidman on 2025-03-04 10:53 [#02641636]
Points: 8385 Status: Regular



can you go upstairs and tell me if the lights are still on
when i toggle the switch


 

offline Roger Wilco from Mo's Beans on 2025-03-04 11:05 [#02641637]
Points: 2146 Status: Lurker | Followup to earthleakage: #02641629



I'd hate to think you've gone off of the dark-haired one out
of Bananarama.


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-04 19:14 [#02641643]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular | Followup to Roger Wilco: #02641635



roger i support you and would happily grab a beer and see an
ae show. but if sean and rob 86 you I'm gonna pretend "I
don't know that guy."

merm your lights didn't go on I think rats chewed through
the wires?

tony hawk 3+4 was indeed announced today, speculative
release date of july. top of my steam wishlist it goes.


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2025-03-04 19:15 [#02641644]
Points: 21537 Status: Regular



Over the last 3 years I've been working on my masters
thesis, which is a study of a curious analog of convergent
evolution, only in this case, on one hand you have
continental drift of tectonic plates, and on the other hand,
biological evolution. before I reveal my mountains of
research, data and arguments to the wider population, can
you give me a brief synopsis based on this picture ie. does
the theory hold merit at first glance and so on? Thank you.

LAZY_TITLE


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-04 19:24 [#02641645]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular



the picture created a continental drift... in my pants.

I think your thesis is solid though. For more tailored help
though, if I ever get a large tract of land at some point
I'll make a space where you can park your van (or upgraded
trailer as you level up) with free water and power and a
bathroom.


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-04 19:26 [#02641646]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular



Upon re-reading, I recognize that I said "though" 2 times in
quick succession, rendering my sentence structure weak and
my point moot.


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2025-03-04 19:40 [#02641650]
Points: 21537 Status: Regular



Thou art used though with thine keyboardalot duetally with
other words of ye old english betwixt


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2025-03-04 21:42 [#02641652]
Points: 7966 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



fav+


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-05 00:47 [#02641654]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular



darius the on cinema special was hilarious.

I wont spoil anything but my favorite bit related to
Chaplin's Chili and a point of sale system.

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-05 00:52 [#02641655]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular



Chaplin's Chili compilation (no spoilers, nothing from new special)


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2025-03-05 01:40 [#02641657]
Points: 21537 Status: Regular | Followup to Wolfslice: #02641655



Awesome show great job was way tighter quality of
fun/humor/entertainment per minute. On cinema (and decker I
guess) are kinda a lot of filler like an understandably
decadent now older person (given the decadent culture) with
a deserving entourage since his old content was so
unique/funy/cutting edge, but now just basically hanging
around with a camera, all impromptu with no tight scripted
comedy, kinda like how newer autechre/aphex albums.


 

offline dariusgriffin from cool on 2025-03-05 13:55 [#02641667]
Points: 12507 Status: Regular



nah man it's tim's greatest work and i attribute it to gregg
turkington's influence because i love gregg so much


 

offline dariusgriffin from cool on 2025-03-05 13:58 [#02641668]
Points: 12507 Status: Regular



also fuck yeah chaplin's chili are back, most exciting news
of 2025


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-05 19:19 [#02641676]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular | Followup to w M w: #02641657



It's hard to pick which one I like more, Awesome Show or On
Cinema. They're just entirely different. Awesome show's
rapid pace and rapid editing certainly benefitted from the
presence of Eric Wareheim. You can see it in behind the
scenes/blooper stuff. Eric's direction is the source of much
of it's "dementia." Tim was always, always funnier on the
screen though.

I think most (though not ALL) do their best compositional
work in their 20s, and Awesome show is definitely dudes in
their 20s... It just can't be repeated. What we have now is
a more mature work, a total slow burn over nearly 15 years.
There's a reason Larry David with Curb and Tim with On
Cinema are doing this "write a detailed skeleton of a plot
and improv around it" style--- it's because it takes years
of practice to pull it off at this level. While people may
display a more raw compositional creativity in their 20s, a
refined, enduring improvisational work like On Cinema
requires a lot more direct experience to execute.

I disagree with your points on it being decadent or
populated with his entourage. On Cinema is a character
study, and it grew oranically with characters being brought
in for very specific moments. Almost all of them are
working, auditioned actors. Every single bit of humor in the
show is character based. Tim and Greg just find a way to
keep bringing these roles back, and they have moments within
moments, a full On Cinema Meta. He works all these
characters into these gigantic live Oscar specials. They're
about as much his entourage as I'd imagine Libehart and
Quall are from Awesome show. He HAS an entourage (or just
his friends is maybe more fair) in his political podcast,
but I don't listen to that at all.


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-05 19:21 [#02641677]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular



On it being decadent, well it's made on a razor's edge of
not being funded at all. Dropped by adult swim and basically
crowd funded now, by their own accounts it's making just
enough to keep the lights on. It's self indulgent comedy to
be sure, but so was Awesome Show, and so is most of the best
shit ever made. On Cinema is definitely constructed to make
something cool rather than something profitable or showy.
It's probably too slow and dry for 90% of people-- Awesome
show truly had more broad appeal.

Overall I'd PROBABLY pick On Cinema as my favorite, given
how enduring it is. When it's on I look forward to it
immensely every week, and the Oscar special is a highlight
of my year.


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-05 19:22 [#02641678]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular



Also I dunno if you watched it in any kind of order but
Decker IS On Cinema. It's his character's show within the
show and most of the humor is based on that mechanic.


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2025-03-06 02:18 [#02641701]
Points: 21537 Status: Regular



You have to be a super hard core troll (and a genius, which
basically means the same thing) to get on stage and just
show your butthole to everyone.
LAZY_TITLE
How did they even do that, like did they have to make sure
there were no children in the audience, with all the pedo
paranoia, or it was just "medical" so acceptable. Or maybe
the audience was mostly people like Miss Doughnut and her
son was "oh, he's a boy" who ate the lazagna on
christmas so didn't really matter. I like how they
incorporated all the "mandatory" covid cringe by calling it
mandatory attendance tour.
And the "trial of tim heidecker" is hilarious in concept,
like making a self troll of a real looking trial about
yourself lol, but it wasnt that funny watching the whole
thing, but trials aren't supposed to be funny I guess.

What was the name of that earlier low budget seeming earlier
thing that was on-cinema ish, like one episode tim had to
choose a date and he chose the large black male instead of
the female, and at the end the female was just by herself
texting on the phone.

i didn't think tom goes to the mayer was that funny.

wrong cops was decent, not like i made any movie myself or
anything.
a lot of vic berger stuff is great (tims entourage I guess)
like the whole trump memeplex of playing airhorns and
damaged warped tape recorder music as his theme song or
those disturbing childrens tv shows compilation etc.


 

offline dariusgriffin from cool on 2025-03-06 15:27 [#02641717]
Points: 12507 Status: Regular | Followup to w M w: #02641701



that's a special effect babe i'm pretty sure, though i too
want to believe eric put his finger inside of tim's bum hole


 

offline dariusgriffin from cool on 2025-03-06 15:29 [#02641718]
Points: 12507 Status: Regular



(as in what we see on the screen is pre-recorded video, not
live, not as in that's a CGI anus. classic stage magic.)


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2025-03-06 21:59 [#02641732]
Points: 21537 Status: Regular | Followup to dariusgriffin: #02641718



I'm not 100% sure given Tim's Most Handsome Man entry, and
the gay naked intro to The Comedy movie.


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-06 22:06 [#02641737]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular



w m w I am convinced if you (or anyone) must do on cinema
*in order* if you want to experience it. It might be
impossible to respect it otherwise. there's a full chronological timeline.

But in the end, yeah maybe not your style. Have you seen tim
and eric's commercial they did for Purple Boys Mattresses? You gotta
watch all parts. My favorite bit (as a gif): here


 

offline RussellDust on 2025-03-06 22:51 [#02641739]
Points: 16108 Status: Regular



I’d like you to tell me it’s going to be ok!


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2025-03-06 23:07 [#02641740]
Points: 21537 Status: Regular | Followup to Wolfslice: #02641737



I'll try that link.

Yeah, and some saints row tall cat parade commercial. They
have a lot of non-awesome show stuff, oh yeah "bag boy" with
brule. This wine thing is a great troll, does it hurt?
smells like my step peppers shoes.
LAZY_TITLE


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2025-03-06 23:10 [#02641741]
Points: 21537 Status: Regular



and those weird SCUM videos, and I know some sort of
Spaghett was in a graveyard fighting with a cop in some sort
of extra non awesome show content.


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-06 23:16 [#02641742]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular | Followup to RussellDust: #02641739



russell it will be ok! You and I both know, you can only
control what you can control. The rest you deal with as you
have to.

I don't actually know what physically ails you (and not
asking out of respect for privacy!) but if you have
stretches where you're entertained enough to forget about it
for a bit, you embrace those.

I'm only offering nerd advice (best advice) here you so will
be no different.

You're pick, you're "help" is this prescription: the movie
Labyrinth from 1986, with Jennifer Connelley and David
Bowie. No one can feel bad in the presence of William the Worm.


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-06 23:18 [#02641743]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular | Followup to w M w: #02641741



Sphagett may be my favorite "skit" all around. Top 3
anyway.

I especially like it when Eric crashes the set and says
"good luck tim!" and tim turns around and says "what??" as
he he's inconvenienced by eric's plebeian outburst.


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2025-03-06 23:18 [#02641744]
Points: 21537 Status: Regular



is this real?
LAZY_TITLE


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-06 23:21 [#02641745]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular | Followup to w M w: #02641744



I would be more inclined to believe in the wrestler's
physique than the loser in the corner's "authentic
reaction," that's for sure.


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-06 23:25 [#02641746]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular



Also I double you'red when I should have yourd in russells
post I do know better and I'm sorry.


 

offline DADONCK from here on 2025-03-07 04:57 [#02641760]
Points: 3623 Status: Lurker | Followup to Wolfslice: #02641582



to listen


 

offline DADONCK from here on 2025-03-07 05:26 [#02641761]
Points: 3623 Status: Lurker



8====D


 

online recycle from Where is Phobiazero (Lincoln) (United States) on 2025-03-07 06:32 [#02641763]
Points: 40575 Status: Regular



Can you please decipher and make any of wMw’s posts make
sense?


 

offline Wolfslice from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2025-03-07 19:23 [#02641785]
Points: 5063 Status: Regular | Followup to recycle: #02641763



ecycle

I think w m ws posts are very readable (unlike epic’s),
and written with an inherent good humor (also unlike
epic’s). Though he’s often off topic to the original
post, his point is pretty basic: Society is set up in such a
way that humans progress through a machine designed to keep
everyone at the bare minimum. Humans are cattle. Some select
few get to live like pigs. This is based on his own
experience and, so far, is overall pretty standard,
quasi-marxist stuff.

Where he deviates a bit, is the EXTENT to which he believes
he’s being kept down. Like, an update to a music software
program, to him, is explicitly designed to keep him in a box
which he cannot escape from, as opposed to simply “a
desire for maximum profit margins”. Taco Bell doesn’t
have his sauce packets? We’re looking at the globalist
agenda in action, a man with intermittent POSSIBLE sauce
packet rewards is a man who keeps coming to the trough, as
BF Skinner proved through experiments with dogs. Also I’m
not sure he eats Taco Bell even though he used to post about
it, I think he’s gone vegetarian in solidarity with the
fellow animals.

I agree with some of his ideas, but I suspect probably
disagree with any solution he would propose. For me, as long
as I can make and experience art, as long as I can come to
place like xltronic and make a post like this, I’m free
enough. Once basic biological (and for some, procreational)
needs are met, there’s just not much to life beyond
entertaining yourself.


 


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