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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-06 05:54 [#02633242]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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LAZY_TITLE
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Wolfslice
from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2024-03-06 05:57 [#02633243]
Points: 4899 Status: Regular
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i genuinely chuckled out loud at the title, if that means anything to ya.
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-06 06:06 [#02633244]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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what should be on website
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Wolfslice
from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2024-03-06 06:13 [#02633245]
Points: 4899 Status: Regular
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ads
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Wolfslice
from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2024-03-06 06:13 [#02633246]
Points: 4899 Status: Regular
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dark souls builds
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Wolfslice
from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2024-03-06 06:13 [#02633247]
Points: 4899 Status: Regular
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ai generated clowns
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-06 06:26 [#02633249]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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A+ website content added
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-06 10:25 [#02633250]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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you can now visit dicordogs to
- ads - dark souls builds - ai generated clowns - NEW FEATURE: search recycle's xltronic posts!!
i think the website needs more. since it is called discordogs i think it needs a list of records that Dan owns next
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-06 10:28 [#02633251]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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discordogs > discord
because more letters
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Wolfslice
from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2024-03-07 00:23 [#02633270]
Points: 4899 Status: Regular
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i searched recycles posts for "anal" and only found him talking about hanal and analord.
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recycle
from Where is Phobiazero (Lincoln) (United States) on 2024-03-07 01:10 [#02633272]
Points: 40005 Status: Regular | Followup to Wolfslice: #02633270
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There’s a lot of truth behind that (no pun intended)
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-07 03:17 [#02633273]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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you can't search posts that don't exist
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recycle
from Where is Phobiazero (Lincoln) (United States) on 2024-03-07 03:36 [#02633274]
Points: 40005 Status: Regular
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Yea you can mr know it all Make 1000000 more threads
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-07 05:44 [#02633280]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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does anyone know what records Dan owns? thanks.
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dariusgriffin
from cool on 2024-03-07 09:19 [#02633282]
Points: 12410 Status: Regular
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White Rider by Skrewdriver
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-07 20:38 [#02633299]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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sorted. what other records does dan own?
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-07 23:32 [#02633316]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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upsite webdated
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Wolfslice
from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2024-03-08 07:54 [#02633317]
Points: 4899 Status: Regular
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Recycle search query "wolfslice"
"Id: 2130937 date: 2007-10-11 07:26 topicId: 99206
love the flashing square, ill have a listen tonight Wolfslice- "
Thanks about the flashing square but did you ever listenn???? I've been waiting 17 years
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Wolfslice
from Bay Area, CA (United States) on 2024-03-08 07:56 [#02633318]
Points: 4899 Status: Regular
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"Id: 2431776 date: 2012-03-24 21:45 topicId: 117807
dj wMw dj tunemx dj Wolfslice dj recycle dj tridenti"
I don't know what this list is for but I'm in very good company and listed in a strong position. Enough to bring a tear to my eye recycle I could never have done it without you
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-11 00:31 [#02633354]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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i refuse to believe that Dan owns JUST ONE RECORD
what other records does Dan own
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-11 00:32 [#02633355]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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i think i'll sort out an SSL certificate because otherwise someone could sniff traffic from updates to the community whiteboard. eventually
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2024-03-11 09:45 [#02633365]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02633354
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I own plenty records but I suspect you'd rather make up the records I have. Maybe what records should I have? Or what records would the Internet persona "Dan" have? Certainly Skrewdriver. But then some Cornershop, just to mess with expectations.
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-12 02:07 [#02633383]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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who are you to claim to be Dan?
fuck it. the basic idea here is "i'll put whatever people want on this website" so i'll add that. discordogs is partially about keeping track of what vinyl is owned by whom
what is white rider by skrewdriver? is it horribly racist or something? there has to be some reason it made the list. it's a joke somehow
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-12 02:12 [#02633384]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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i always forget i'm so into words that, i dunno, when you're masterclass you come up with shit so smooth normies don't even realize you're pulling something cheeky: disord, discogs, dogs on acid
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-12 02:14 [#02633385]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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then it just collapses into a mess as a domain, people will be calling it "disc or dogs"
the sort of branding nightmare that sticks around in the memory
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-13 14:22 [#02633447]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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i've learned a few things so far
1 ~ in the logs, there were a couple automated scanners i saw over and over. one was very eager for a /.env so i created /.env with a size of 4 bytes [contents: "cunt"]
it would ask for /.env on its second try and, upon receiving "cunt" it would go quiet instead of asking for another 30 URLs of horseshit. i wager i actually made their thing die with a syntax error -- like, it didn't lose interest, i broke it doing that. now that i know you can do this sort of thing...
2 ~ ohhhh, right, lots of people use PHONES for internets. so i took two minutes and made everything, i guess, like in super mario bros 3 where everything is HUGE and that's when people actually started using the things.
...and this leads me to a suggestion: turn up the font size on xltronic ten or twelve px. or, well, spend 20 minutes on the toilet supersizing all the things, not hard, just sort it out fast. and if people have a fucking problem with it on the desktop they can just set the web browser font size down
20 minutes, xltronic usable on phones. just a thot
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-13 14:58 [#02633448]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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re: 1 ~ "and 50 guests," yeah right. bots and automated vulnerability scanners. the fuckers probably use 3x the resources any of us humans using zilty do. if i'm going to get anything interesting out of this ketchup packet of an imaginary server, i need to shake some of these leeches. or, it'd help a lot. if you can break the more popular ones on the second or third try you save ~30 guests worth of spam. you could use this on zilty too but that's more than 20 minutes of toilet time.
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-13 15:24 [#02633449]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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is everyone using AI so much no one tried making a four byte garbage file with what the scanner asks for? with a british expletive as payload?
i thot: "alright, once it gets that file, it will make assumptions about software the site is running, and it will ask for a different thing next than it usually does"
instead it just broke. this smells of python code. most of them will probably not go down so easy. but that was singlehandedly the loudest one in there, which is why i finally... cunt.
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2024-03-13 15:49 [#02633450]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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I hacked your website LAZY_TITLE
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-15 12:14 [#02633527]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular | Followup to Wolfslice: #02633245
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> ads > dark souls builds > ai generated spam
gardening is never an immediate process, but can be quick.
here are the things you requested, or at least some of them, courtesy of simply leaving a textbox on the open internet:
LAZY_TITLE
i have upadded some more dates to site now. maybe i should add a panel of lightswitches or something. i have real work to do now tho
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-15 13:07 [#02633529]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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i need that photo [the gay one] of rdj in the purple shirt with his fingers all fabulous for a sidebar in the Cool Gay Bands section if anyone has it
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-15 17:03 [#02633530]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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discordogs is not just about records that people own and CDs they've broken, it's about dividing up music into esoteric categories, and reporting on them. and perhaps dogs.
i figure i'll run it by the editorial staff first. do you think this is too much? or, well, am i having too much fun
headline: Bad LSD "Trip" Makes Aphex Twin Homosexual?
[gay picture of aphex twin] caption: Richard D. James is reportedly a homosexual after listening to Goa Trance under the influence of 800mcg of LSD
"A
ccording to the Trainwrecks and Trip Disasters section of the highly reputable website erowid.org, Richard D. James has been homosexual ever since an ill-considered attempt to listen to goa trance on 800mcg of acid [reportly 'just to see what would happen']. Discordogs is currently investigating; Keep an eye out for our full report!"
-- Elmer Ezekiel Pretzel, Discordogs Staff Researcher
here is elmer's byline
Elmer Ezekiel Pretzel is the Discordogs.com Staff Researcher, a Deacon, and the proud father of three ferrets, a sergal, and a belgian malinois. In his spare time, Elmer plays the Ocarina and is an amateur orgone surgeon specializing in fresh roadkill.
if this is too much fun, the article itself will definitely be way too much fun because
"...and after that, I blacked out," RDJ wrote in his trip report "When I came to, I had a muscly, sweaty man inside of me, and I was enjoying it incredibly much. I never wanted it to stop. The next day, I couldn't stop thinking about it. It was as if a monkey was going at me brain with a hammer and a chisel. Harder and deeper
and then elmer writes
To help me make sense of this, I paid a visit to Quebius Iaccixochl, Professor of Mammal Imprinting at Bunker Hill Community College. I asked him to explain Mammal Imprinting to me.
i still need that picture to post the summary/tease for the article
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-15 17:15 [#02633531]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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"The initial breakthrough that launched the whole field was when we realized that Dog thinks it's People only when People raise Dog. On a hunch, we trained a few Geese to raise Dog and... sure enough, Dog thought it was Goose. We knew we were on to something."
"But aren't Geese non-mammals?" I asked.
Quebius nodded. "Exactly. As non-mammals, Geese are capable of Non Mammal imprinting -- which... well, we're still not sure how far it goes, really. After we got Goose to think it's Stuffed Goose and Goose to think it's Stuffed Dinosaur, well, we probably would have tried a Stuffed Pikachu next, but lab intern didn't follow direction, and instead, purely by accident, Goose thought it was Samsung Galaxy S7. On a hunch, we grabbed something from the kitchen and Goose to thought it was Can Of Baked Beans. Last month, resarchers in China have got Goose to think it's Ping Pong Ball. Marvelous creatures, non-mammals."
this more or less grew out of [gay rdj photo] with [above caption] and i'm just bashing out bits here and there, bunches of it are recycled. it's far from done no copyediting but i'm just goofing around
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-15 17:21 [#02633532]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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part of this is a growing rage at tropes in... i dunno, mid-shelf deep-dive articles. earlier i thot: yes, i know how these fucking articles always end:
"Is it possible that LSD turns Human into Puppy, Homosexuality thinks its Dognapping, and Goa Trance is a Monkey using a chisel on your brain?" I asked.
Quebis paused a moment, thinking carefuly before he repled. "I certainly can't rule it out."
but i've really painted myself into a corner with that chain of associations and it'll take me a while to work backwards to the start of the article
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-15 18:17 [#02633533]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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Elmer is a god-fearin' man
We reached out to Warp Records for clarification, but 27 incredibly polite emails received no reply and after that their email began having errors. We will update this if they get back to us. Meanwhile, we are diligently combing through thousands of hours of hardcore gay pornography to try and understand homosexuals better.
If you believe you can shed any light on the sexuality of Richard D. James, please get in touch with Joyrex through forum.watmm.com as he is doing important work to recondition such unfortunate souls. Please do not send pornography as he is in a wheelchair and has a blood condition. You can send it to me instead. god bless
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-15 20:33 [#02633536]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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i figure eventually warp might get around to emailing poor elmer back and trying to explain to him that what he read on erowid was just softcore braindance fanfiction that someone uploaded as a trip report as a troll
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-15 21:48 [#02633539]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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Elmer has spent so much time reporting and researching that he's started to get used to the softcore braindance story, then he had to watch some hardcore homosexual porn -- you know, for research -- and
since Elmer's article was on this Erowid.org trip report, "Richard's Assid Awakening," he selected pornography that seemed to have similar themes and scenarios [not at all because he was interested! lord heavens].
by the time warp emails him back, elmer has been walking slightly closer to the gay bar on his evening walks, wondering what it smells like.
the patient representative from warp records explains to elmer that he's now a homosexual, he's had an awakening triggered by stewing in awakening story -- that taking the internet seriously has made him gay; no acid required.
elmer gets depressed, eventually implodes, goes wild on banging guys for a bit, starts cutting his hair a bit diagonal, and returns to discordogs as staff researcher after his leave of absence
so -- in the end i think i will just caption the picture "according to a trip report on erowid.org," and not put poor elmer through all that
then that lets me finish the sidebar in the Cool Gay Bands section, which was what stopped me from adding the Cool Gay Bands section earlier today. and i also need that photo. the gay one
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-15 22:51 [#02633541]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02633533
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> If you believe you can shed any light on the sexuality of
Richard D. James, please get in touch with Joyrex through forum.watmm.com as he is doing important work to recondition
such unfortunate souls. Please do not send pornography as he
is in a wheelchair and has a blood condition. You can send it to me instead. god bless
...man, how did Joyrex wind up in a wheelchair? Will it still happen in this timeline, so long as I don't send Elmer down the rabbit hole?
I scrub through the Turning Elmer Gay timeline to find out how it happens:
Working on his article, Elmer winds up contacting Joyrex for background, and Joyrex is as concerned about richard's acid-induced homosexuality as Elmer. While Elmer sticks with his article, Joyrex starts researching the psychology of becoming gay, and, after a week or two on parallel courses, they combine into one path and both go down the rabbit hole forever. Joyrex simply has worse luck than Elmer in handing the aftermath and wraps his civic around a tree, later blowing .19 BAC. It really could have happened to Elmer just as easily; he was just lucky
While I do somewhat appreciate the thought of turning Joyrex gay, I don't want to put him in a wheelchair. Another reason to pull Elmer off this project immediately.
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-15 22:52 [#02633542]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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What records does Dan own?
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-16 00:15 [#02633545]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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A. You can see how useful Elmer is, really. Even though he never got far enough to figure out how Goa Trance and 800 micrograms can turn someone homosexual, his overall arc and collapse did tidily explain how christians trying to save the gays can, oddly, wind up incredibly gay themselves [have you ever considered they weren't always that way?]
2. someone like freaking mermaidman will be like "THAT TIMELINE HAS INCONGRUENCIES" and you complain about that so many time. that fine -- i'll explain
at the time i wrote the stretch with [emailing warp 27 times, joyrex in a wheelchair] i didn't know we would be pulling Elmer off the timeline.
i'm simulating elmer timeline within my own timeline, you see. and as warp's timeline is more important than mine, it took a bit of my timeline for them to get back to elmer's.
simulated within my timeline, elmer was writing some of those... italic notes they put after an article. at the time in my timeline that i'm simulating elmer writing the post-article notes, elmer hadn't heard back from warp by press time. but on any timeline, if the article is published -- joyrex is in the wheelchair. i was jumping ahead in elmer's timeline to write those notes... and, before warp's timeline got back to elmer's timeline, there was nothing incongruent here. no sir
3. i don't expect hevquip to break CDs to help things along, but i really did expect everyone to step up here and list Dan's records in a flood of trollish posts. instead, the list is small and it's been malingering here for a while now. i didn't expect this and i hadn't planned for this. we have a timeline here, guys. so:
What records does Dan own?
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-16 01:43 [#02633548]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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...
ugh.
a proper journalist would reach out to Warp for comment, and document the attempt. tha up , before i even make a comment on my time like elmer hadn't heard back from warp before press time [within his timeline], which meant it's a comment about
because warp hadn't gotten back to Elmer,
you know what's actually hard for me?
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-16 02:08 [#02633549]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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fucking trying to explain this timeline shit without, like... i need to use or borrow at least some notation from math. timeline₁ or stuff i can't even use the fancy linux compose key to enter into a computer and it's like "teTeX is probably the only answer without a pen and a pad of paper"
i try to write it out and suddenly i've confused the fuck out of myself. like when you're trying to use a buzzer on the back of your head; then you're repeatedly rotating the buzzer, and... shit, no, that's not what i meant. wait, fuck. AUGH!
you get three or four layers deep of "how do i rotate my arm?" and then you move your torso more than you meant to and suddenly it's all wrong and you have to go through multiple layers of... wait, shit. dammit. FUK
then back of our head itches. we put the buzzer down. with zero effort, our index finger goes right to the proper spot and scratches the itch. that's more like what it is internally, to me.
then the buzzer is like trying to verbalize it without math notation
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-16 06:24 [#02633557]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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alright. i had a think. so i got caught up trying to verbalize why something that would seem like an obvious plot hole in a technical way.
i've long loved satire, and... what's that gag, where the guy at the front desk keeps switching uniforms; he's the receptionist and the bellboy and.. i like making web sites, and...
"perhaps Riced Out Industries should launch a new venture about [80s video equipment etc]," i'll say in my head.
the question sits there in silence for a moment. i'm not feeling strongly about it.
"i'll have to check with marketing on that one," i think. verbalizing my conclusion in my hed
marketing is already telling me: no one gives a shit about our weird rare NTSC modular collection. this is not a business plan, this is an escapist fantasy
...i've not put that in quotes because, i dunno, it's... quasi-nonverbal? it's quieter and more muffled and i'm getting lots of stuff in a nonverbal way along with it
and that has a lot more to do with the years of meditating, the weasels, the bullshit thread. i've spent years running cable in my brain to get all those info readouts
earlier today, i wrote: "i wonder if warp will get back to poor elmer" and at the time, warp really hadn't. i got some work done and the quasi-nonverbal info readouts are all: warp was actually very nice about it, but elmer is still taking the news horribly
then it's actively me again, taking care of things like lovingly selecting a title for the fanfiction, and laying down the Clockwork Elmer arc in a careful technical way
but i have to say, i never actually decided to have Elmer do this. it's sort of like he just showed up in my office talking about the article he's been working on... except there wasn't even any moment like that, we're just kind of needle drop into the middle somewhere
but it is just me playing ping-pong with myself
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-16 08:23 [#02633558]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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> but i have to say, i never actually decided to have Elmer do this. it's sort of like he just showed up in my office talking about the article he's been working on... except there wasn't even any moment like that, we're just kind of needle drop into the middle somewhere
but it is just me playing ping-pong with myself
i wrote chunks of the "dog thinks its people" fever dream 60 minutes scientific interview stuff a while back. i got up on a similar spiral. i'm not sure if elmer didn't exist until a few days ago, or if it got as far as me being in a position where i didn't remember tasking Elmer with this the last time i was writing about this stuff either.
when i talk about running cable and getting more information, it's like -- joyrex was, i am reasonably sure, in this sort of situation before, because of the tingle i got when i said "wraps his civic around a tree," and that phrase, in particular, i am beyond certain i said verbatim before.
sometime. i don't know when. i can't recall if it was posted here, or even if it was as far back as on discord. but my wiretaps have this happening on a monitor that hasn't existed in that physical orientation since... it could have been on discord
and so i can track this stuff down. that none of this would work if i didn't spend all those rambly posts tracking loads of it down. and i've run so many down it's now more about gauging whether i should bother chasing this or that one down as well.
then i've some experience with that as well, and i know to ignore the "did elmer exist" and simply search my computer files for that strange baby talk explain of domesticating dogs and brainwashing and acid sexual orientation.
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-16 08:28 [#02633559]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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elmer [this round?] has not existed in a linear sense. he got to the point where i began to see elmer could not finish this. it's a few orders of magnitude beyond what his psyche could handle
keeping elmer would have meant i'd also have had to finish more of Richard's Assid Awakening. and that talk of christians making themselves gay without understanding why, well, that warning applies to me as solidly as it does to them. here is the entirety of what does exist:
"...and after that, I blacked out," RDJ wrote. "When I came to, I had a muscly, sweaty man inside of me, and I was enjoying it incredibly much. I never wanted it to stop. The next day, I couldn't stop thinking about it. It was as if a monkey was going at me brain with a hammer and a chisel. Harder and deeper, until I was unable to stand it any longer. I told my gorgeous Russian wife to pack her shit and took a lorry to the nearest gay bar. My excitement rose as we got closer. By the time I was walking up to the door, I was so bloody out of my mind I was no longer in control of my own actions -- As I tore my clothes off and thew myself down on the pool table. Someone shoved the cue ball up my ass and I moaned with such pleasure that..."
...and at that point, i thought: with the cue ball up the ass, we just waltzed past the point where we could pan to the fireplace with a straight face. i'm glad richard was in too much of a hurry to even look at the other bar patrons, because that means i've no idea what they look like either. but any further and i'll see soon enough.
so. i literally ended with ellipses as i realized this, as above, in the middle of a sentence. then i decided we'd have legal tell elmer that's all they could print because it would turn children into heroin addicts. but elmer would have to begin obsessing over the details before he could start to crack goa trance, and legal can't stop that
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-16 08:38 [#02633560]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular | Followup to Roger Wilco: #02633450
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I hacked your website LAZY_TITLE
that's sweet of you. but, like, above? it's a crappy little server and these things aren't a light load and it's making so much noise it's impeding my view of what i'm doing with apache. that file being there punches at least one crappy scanner in the nose, and as stupid as it is that's actually still working, and still making the logs more readable
but screaming "HOW DARE ANYONE TRY TO HAX ME" ? laughable. the thing is hammered all day on any window not welded shut. the only thing of value on there, ostensibly, is an sqlite database with a relatively recent scrape of zilty for the thad post search. that's the only treasure in the box, and it's not even that good. and the server's too shitty to run much so there's actually not much to try when attempting to hack it. and it costs $5 a month but that's literally billed down to seconds or some crap so if you really trash it i can just delete the instance and save ~$2.50
so i'm also doing things like leaving an entirely unprotected textbox with a submit button that lets anyone fill it with spam links and it charms me, the page has a little sandbox that grows weeds. if you get in there and get the zilty database, god bless. i'm not sure what else you could do except admire my unix configuration [you're not getting in unless you guess my login or there's some shit like a 9/10 zero-day in openssh and i'm off on a zeppelin tour that week or something to not patch it
it's also an experiment in this sense. kind of "so how's the weather out there in 2024" -- and, well, rough. and that IP address is in a particularly bad neighborhood. so you have nothing good to steal and put iron bodega bars on the windows; the ventilation exhaust output. i've been kind of squinting at it to see if there's some new clever way in i'm not wise to yet. in 2024
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-16 09:21 [#02633561]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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"Dog Thinks It's Monkey After Being Violently Dognapped"
would be about as far as we could push Elmer. the video clip is quite haunting, especially with sound. and it's just a checkpoint along the way. but Elmer was tenacious. to the point of destroying himself on that abandoned timeline, to bring the fact(s) to discordogs. so i suspect we've not seen the last of him
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-17 16:00 [#02633577]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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> Then i've some experience with that as well, and i know to ignore the "did elmer exist" and simply search my computer files for that strange baby talk explain of domesticating dogs and brainwashing and acid sexual orientation.
just now, i thought: ...shit, was it a female attorney that time? i think?
...and did i write that whole fiction before and russell loved it? maybe someone even helped me with the name? deja vu is actually something i've begun to see in shades of grey
anyways, i still haven't actually looked it up. it's more fun to stew on it a bit first and see how much comes back
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-17 17:58 [#02633582]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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...and did i write that whole fiction before and russell loved it? maybe someone even helped me with the name? deja vu is actually something i've begun to see in shades of grey
...and i didn't know what Awakening was at the time; i hadn't heard the term and i'm being told it's a whole genre of fiction. i think that was the same conversation
then #02633539 about, like... "similar themes and scenarios" is from some guy who worked at a porn vid shop talking about men like elmer and the progression of them gradually realizing their gay-ness. maybe it was also part of the same conversation
...none of that was anything i consciously integrated at the time. so if i'm right and i have done this all over again, someone else's words are just pouring out of me and i'm not even realizing they're someone else's
i'll go dredge up what i wrote last time eventually. but fuck me it's hard to write up that shit about conditioning -- not just explaining it, but emotionally handling it. i'm tougher than elmer's psyche, but at this point i get the impression that i'm sabotaging myself on it as a sort of protective mechanism, because when i get too deep into it, i get close to things that could damage my own psyche
but it's just a theory. i could be having quite a brainfart here
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2024-03-17 18:55 [#02633585]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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i think i actually even uploaded some of the dialog in a file and linked it?
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