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EXECUTIVE: Reddit is a company that was founded in 2005 and made to look like it had been around for ages by hiring an expensive web-designer, who did a terrible job, but the internet never forgives or forgets anything so everyone thinks it's really old, so the internet never forgives. EXECUTIVE: Reddit's previous web design was terrible, but everyone on the internet forgives or forgets anything so it never actually got much negative attention, and now that Reddit is a publicly traded company it can afford to fix this problem as long as its new CEO doesn't decide to screw things up by firing all of its employees. EXECUTIVE: Nowadays there are thousands of websites on the internet for people who want to post random memes and share cat videos, but Reddit is still one of them. EXECUTIVE: The controversy surrounding its new hire led many people to quit Reddit after CEO Ellen Pao was fired for her failure to make the site more profitable by firing all of its employees and selling it to Facebook instead, as is usually the goal of internet startups that are trying to grow. |
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EXECUTIVE: Current profits are currently down by more than $100 million, but that's only due to a shortage of crabs! This shortfall will soon be rectified in time for the holiday season, and we have already contracted with the world famous Poseidon Group. EXECUTIVE: We here at The Jersey Shore would like to thank all of our fans, both old and new, who help us maintain our high ratings on MTV! We continue to be amazed by your continued support of The Jersey Shore, as we've only been a TV show for two years! EXECUTIVE: Cultural issues are still abounding in the summer resort town. Most recently we've learned that a local bar owner was arrested for having sex with his own cousin, and we must remind you that this is not just the latest example of "family values" in America. EXECUTIVE: The Threats To Current Business Model section will remain unchanged until the end of the year when we plan to launch a new show, Jersey Shore II! This new show should serve as both an expansion and a consolidation for our business model, as we'll be able to draw from a wider range of characters than before. We expect this new show to earn even more profits than The Jersey Shore has in the past! EXECUTIVE: In the Threats To Current Business Model section of this report, it should go without saying that there are many threats to our business model. As a matter of fact, we've already been threatened by both New York City and Miami Beach, and those are only two threats out of hundreds! We have learned that these new threats will likely be launched in the summer timeframes, which is when The Jersey Shore is not actually on TV. EXECUTIVE: We here at The Jersey Shore would like to wish you all a very happy Labor Day Weekend from us here at The Jersey Shore! |
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Their song “stupid girl” is really good. It’s a pro women song |
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You are at this moment in time a multibillion dollar entity, and have access to the most prestigious of all media outlets, which is currently named The Huffington Post. Your business model is currently based on sex tapes, selling sex products, and appearing on reality television shows. And in your current position as the head of Snooki, you are also one of the most famous and sought after individuals in human history. |
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User:EXECUTIVE takes a question from THAD: THAD: I heard you were looking for a cat. Does that mean you're getting rid of your dog? |
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EXECUTIVE: AUTECHRE'S SECOND QUARTER OF 2015 WAS EXCELLENT. IN NOVEMBER, THEY PUBLISHED _INCUNABULUM_, A 3xLP COLLECTION OF VINTAGE RECORDINGS FROM BEFORE THEY FOUND AUDIO DUPLICATION ON BARGAIN HARDWARE. SEVERAL LISTS CITED IT AMONG THE MOST INFLUENTIAL ALBUMS OF 2015, EVEN THOUGH ITS RELEASE DATE WAS JUNE 30, WHEN IT WASN'T YET AVAILABLE FOR PURCHASE. EXECUTIVE: AUTECHRE'S SECOND QUARTER OF 2015 DID NOT GO AS SUCCESSFULLY. IN MAY, THEY RELEASED _FAXED COPY_, AN EP OF COLLABORATIONS WITH JOE CURTIS. THIS WASN'T NECESSARY BECAUSE THEY ALREADY HAD SEVERAL COLLABORATIONS ON FILE IN A TANGLED HEAP, BUT THE EP STILL PERFORMED NICELY AND GAVE JOE CURTIS MORE EXPOSURE. EXECUTIVE: THIS QUARTER'S MOST SIGNIFICANT EVENT WAS _THE FANTASTIC MR. FADE_ IN AUGUST, A VIDEOSCRIPT WHICH IS THE RESULT OF A LONG-RUNNING PROJECT TO PURGE HIS PSYCHE THROUGH AUTOFEEDBACK. EXECUTIVE: AS MENTIONED EARLIER, _INCUNABULUM_ WAS AMONG 2015'S BEST-RECEIVED RELEASES; HOWEVER, THE ALBUM DIDN'T GENERATE VERY HIGH SALES. THIS MAY BE AT LEAST IN PART DUE TO _INCUNABULUM_ BEING A COMPLETELY UNSOLVABLE MIXUP OF TRACKS. EXECUTIVE: THE ALBUM IS STILL PRAISED BY FANS AND CRITICS, BUT IT HAS TAKEN ITS TOLL ON _INCUNABULUM_'S AWARDS CREDENTIALS; IT LOST THE #2 SPOT IN KUČKA'S RANKING OF 2015 ALBUMS BECAUSE OF THIS. EXECUTIVE: STOP MESSING WITH YOUR HAIR, MIKE! |
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Thad: Hey, boss? Canoes are gay or not? EXECUTIVE: What's that, Thad? Thad: Can I canoe this weekend with my boyfriend? Are we gonna get in trouble for that, boss? EXECUTIVE: You mean, can your canoe be homosexual, Thad? Thad: YES! Or no. EXECUTIVE: I think the answer's yes, because a canoe is essentially two people with their arms and legs wrapped around each other in very close contact for long periods of time. It would take an extraordinary amount of effort not to have sex while canoeing, Thad, so I reckon that's what we meant when we called it gay, yes? Thad: Yes! That makes me feel much better, boss. Thanks! EXECUTIVE: Cool, I'm glad I could help, Thad. And by the way, I don't know where you got your information from, but canoes are definitely not gay. Thad: No they aren't? EXECUTIVE: No, no, of course not, duh, I mean, it takes two people to paddle a canoe. Thad: Yeah, and one of them is always sitting at the back! EXECUTIVE: But that doesn't make it gay, Thad, canoes are heterosexual. If they were gay you wouldn't get your own canoe, would you? Thad: No, but I don't know how to swim and I might drown! EXECUTIVE: Good point, well there's a good chance that if the person you're in close contact with is gay they won't be able to swim very well either, so we should all make sure our canoes aren't full of homosexuals. That way they'll be safe and not drown. Thad: Thanks! EXECUTIVE: You're welcome, Thad. Now let me get back to writing my quarterly report for EPIC'S FOOT. So...what are some of the cultural issues we can expect at EPIC'S FOOT over the next year? Thad: I dunno, boss. |
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15 days in total, counting the time it takes to make up a new one! 1SEX PARAQUETE IN MY BED. I expect you will have a good supply of them by then!! I am a sex paraquete myself 35 days in total, counting the time it takes to make up a new one! 3SEX PARAQUETE IN MY BED. 15 days in total, counting the time it takes to make up a new one! 4SEX PARAQUETE IN SEX PARAQUETES' BEDS. 35 days in total, counting the time it takes to make up a new one! 5SEX PARAQUETE IN SEX PARAQUETESS' BEDS. 15 days in total, counting the time it takes to make up a new one! 6SEX PARAQUETE IN SEX PARAQUETES'BEDS. 35 days in total, counting the time it takes to make up a new one! 7SEX PARAQUETE IN MY BED. 15 days in total, counting the time it takes to make up a new one! 8SEX PARAQUETE IN SEX PARAQUETES'BEDS. 35 days in total, counting the time it takes to make up a new one! 9SEX PARAQUETE IN MY BED. I expect you will have a good supply of them by then!! You're the one expecting all that money 15 days in total, counting the time it takes to make up a new one! 1SEX PARAKEET IN MY BED. 35 days in total, counting the time it takes to bed a sex parakeet I expect you will have a good supply of them by then!! I would assume you would want more of them than what your little paraquete could produce...~ https://www.di SEX PARAQUETE IN MY BED. 15 days in total, counting the time it takes to make up a new one! 2SEX PARAKEET |
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She knew she must have stared at him from across the classroom all period, but then during third period he'd come up to her desk and asked if she wanted to hang out with him after school—he called himself Pete Schnosstich Sound System—and though he was a little scary looking, she agreed because she figured that she could at least keep an eye on him. Afterward, they'd spent time in the school library; he'd shown her all these books about philosophy and psychology and religion—she'd always loved reading about those kinds of things—and it turned out Pete was really into all of them too, which was pretty cool, and then she hadn't even been thinking that he could be a weirdo, but when they'd started to kiss her, she felt like maybe that was the case. The next time she saw him, though, he was in his band uniform—she didn't recognize it as one at first because she'd never seen any kids with them, and anyway the ones at other schools all just looked like they were going to a party or something. But Pete wore the same kind of weird-looking leather vest that she guessed was supposed to look like armor, and he had the kind of huge metal horns in his hair—she'd never seen those before either—and on one side there was an extra big one that looked to her like it could have been a helmet if you wore it on your head. But instead Pete just kept putting this thing across his shoulders, she wasn't even sure what it was called or where he got it from and then he started saying stuff and moving his arms around in weird ways—she thought maybe he was some kind of robot at first—and then he started to sing too but the singing part she didn't like so much. |
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And when it came time for Pete's band, the Sound System, to play, they had all kinds of stuff going on behind them. She knew it was probably just a projector or something like that, but she'd never seen anything like this before. There were these huge projections of their band logo everywhere and then even the whole stage was covered in it! And as soon as Pete got up to sing, there were all these other lights around them that started moving around and making weird noises—she thought maybe they were robots at first but she wasn't sure—and then the music got really fast and loud, but she didn't even mind. The first time she saw it, though, she was so surprised by how much fun Pete seemed to be having that the whole thing made her feel kind of jealous that she couldn't do something like that herself, which was silly because she could. She could do anything she wanted to do—she already knew that! But there was something about seeing all those people and the music and being in the same room as Pete that got her thinking maybe she didn't want to be the person who would be up on stage singing instead of him, which was kind of stupid. |
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And of course, once they'd finished playing, he had everyone sing along with them—which, again, was fun but also kind of weird—and then he started this really long story about a guy named Gary Busys who would always forget everything and then someone came along to help him out, and then he made it sound like it was from some book written by one of the other bands and they were all trying to sell their music together but none of them had anything to show for themselves. When she asked Pete about it later that night, he said, "Yeah—Gary Busys was a character I made up years ago," which really didn't make any sense at all because how could Gary possibly be the same as this Pete guy? She guessed maybe they were both just musicians who wrote songs. Maybe even Pete was Gary. And maybe she wasn't Jessie after all, but instead Gary Busys. And then there was a weird thing that happened with the band, too, because Pete called her over to his table on the way out and gave her a set of headphones and said he wanted her to get them fixed up. He said it didn't make sense for him to go back home to California before they finished touring, so instead he was going to take some time in New York at this friend's place where she could stay for as long as she needed. "So I'll come out and see you sometime," Pete said as she stood by the bar and sipped her drink, "when you're ready." And she didn't say anything because what was there to say? She knew he wasn't Gary Busys, but that didn't matter either. On the way out, Jessie noticed that Danny had come to the show by himself. There were a few other people at the gig who were kind of freaks or whatever—one girl with one hand and no hair, another guy in a wheelchair—but none of them were as cool-looking as Danny. |
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And when they got back from the subway station, he said, "Let's listen to music." She always liked that—and she had already decided on the song she wanted to listen to. It was about a girl who was feeling sad, and she just needed someone to come over, make her feel better, and go away when it got boring. Then they took off all their clothes except for their underwear (which they always kept on), climbed into bed, and started watching the music video. And the man said, "You look so good." "I could say the same about you," she replied. But then he added, "But I'm not going to say that because we already know it's true." She liked what he was saying—and she always did—but as soon as they started getting intimate, she remembered that she didn't want him to see her tits. And so, when the moment came for them to take each other's clothes off, she turned around and faced away from him, but still kept her hand in his lap as they had earlier in the evening. Then, right after he had started sucking on one of her nipples, he said, "I'm going to be very gentle with you." He always was—and she loved that about him. But then, just when it started to get really good, they both heard someone pounding on the front door. When they opened their eyes, they saw it was the police officer they had met in the car earlier that evening. And as soon as he walked into the bedroom, his gun was out of its holster and trained right at the back of her head. The scene that follows will be familiar to anyone who has been reading along so far: "Whoa! Hold on a minute! What's going on here?" said the police officer. "I thought I had this place under control. Why are you two in here, anyway? Weren't you at the car show just now?" He looked to the side and saw the video cameras that were all around them. |
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# Is this a bold move? if (activeBadIdea.isBoldMoveBro()): # Does this involve bees? Later, evaluate: Fireworks, Firearms, Wildlife, and Women if (activeBadIdea.involvesBees()): # Evaluate circumstances: alcohol, then bongs, then faygo, ketamine, cereal, etc. switch(activeBadIdea.circumstances().intoxicants().alcohol( )): if (switch == true): # Evaluate your surroundings: porch, then hose, then hammers, nails, etc. switch(activeBadIdea.surroundings().hose()): if (switch == true): print 'You are bored, drunk, and angry, and you don't want to be around the bees anymore' else: print 'You are bored, drunk, and angry, and you don\'t want to be around the bees anymore' else: # This just didn't happen print 'This just didn\'t happen' else: # This just didn't happen print 'This just didn\'t happen' else: # This just didn\'t happen print 'This just didn\'t happen' |
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the future is here, truly: cJuggalo *juggalo; // if you're drunk and angry, you'd better be wearing a helmet. for (cJuggalo* j=0; j<15; ++j) { juggalo = new cJuggalo(new cBadIdea(), "hella pissed off", 4); cIntoxicant load = how_loaded->simulateIntoxication(gardenHose, juggalo); beehive_under_porch = new cBeeHive("bees under porch", 3); std::cout << "The garden hose will flow at about "<< load << "\n"; beehive_under_porch->simulateAngryBees(gardenHose, juggalo, true); delete juggalo; } |
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// Juggalos resolve their plan of attack on the bee's nest, which is a finite automaton (bees juggalos int* porchBees = new int[CRIB_SIZE]; // The porches and bees are in the same array because they share some neurons. |
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int main(int argc, char** argv) { cIntoxicant beehive_under_porch; // the porch is under a bee hive. cBeehiveUnderPorch bubba(beehive_under_porch); std::cout << "bubba is stingy and angry."< } |
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// Bees will move in towards the juggalos. If they bump into them, the honeydew will be transferred from the bee to the juggalo. // If the honeydew is transferred away from a beehive it will grow upwards and be absorbed by the porch. The amount of honeydew that is absorbed by the porch is equal to the number of bees in the hive * the distance traveled by the honeydew since it was produced. // The juggalos may try to avoid the bees, but if they are not successful then their clothes will get covered with bee vomit. This will happen at a rate proportional to the number of bees in the garden and the distance they fly before hitting something (other than other bees). The amount of time that it takes for them to get cleaned off by rain is equal to the number of honeydew particles hit * the distance traveled by each particle. This will happen at a rate proportional to the number of bees in the garden and the distance they fly before hitting something (other than other bees). // If the juggalos get cleaned off, then they start attacking each other. This happens at an equal probability for all possible pairs of juggalos: 1/k^2 where k is the number of juggalos. // The longer that this code stays up, the more likely it will be that somebody will ask me to make changes to it. |
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// A few simple steps to protect your bees: beeAvoidBulletFire(badIdea); // If you're not in the know, don't even go there. beeHitMolotov(how_loaded, beehive_under_porch); // Too many bad ideas in one place. That's a lot of shit to clean up. clownFuckUp(badIdea, beehive_under_porch); // You have to watch out for the Juggalos. They're crazy. Weirdos. clownLoseControlToJuggalos(how_loaded, beehive_under_porch); // If Juggalos can get in your house without permission, you're screwed. clownBandOfFuckers(beehive_under_porch); // Don't make them angry by pissing on their turf. They don't know when to stop. beeBeesInsideBarbecueGrill(badIdea, how_loaded, beehive_under_porch); // A good idea can have bad side effects (see what I did there?). Likewise a Juggalo can do something very cool. clownSweetJuggalos(beehive_under_porch); // If you're planning on taking a dump, do it before the bees get involved. They'll have no problem with your business. clownBeeBombs(badIdea, how_loaded, beehive_under_porch); // It's hard to keep track of everything that happens when you're busy taking a shit. clownPoopingAndFuckingAround(how_loaded, beehive_under_porch); // Bees hate being bothered. clownHumanBabies(beehive_under_porch); // It's better to do it with a friend, but if you don't have one then a group of friends will work in a pinch. clownBeesAndFriendsAreCloserThanTheApparentlyNot(badIdea, how_loaded, beehive_under_porch); // When you fuck up, you'll pay for it even if it's not your fault. clownHumansAndBeesPayingForShitTheyDidntDo(beehive_under_po rch); // Some people will help you just because they're nice. It doesn't matter why they do it though. They just will. clownTheBeesAreGonnaGetYouOneDayBecauseTheyJustLikeToHelpPe ople(beehive_under_porch); // You don't always have to be the good guy in order to get things done. clownTheDamnedBeeHive(how_loaded, badIdea, beehive_under_porch); |
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// - When the number of Juggalos exceeds the number of bees in a hive, the entire hive will become drunk on alcohol and die of alcohol poisoning shortly thereafter (except for the Queen Bee) |
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// This function is supposed to be a bold move, but I'm not sure it is. The first time I saw this function call I was fooled as well. // 1. Bees are really bad ass and don't need any help from anyone to get stoned on cough syrup. Just have them sit around in the sunshine until they get a little tipsy. If you want to make it easy, put their hive under a porch with some windows that face west and they will do all of the work for you. // 2. Juggalos are super bad ass and don't need any help from anyone to get stoned on cough syrup. Just have them sit around in the sunshine until they get a little tipsy. If you want to make it easy, put their camp out under a porch with some windows that face west and they will do all of the work for you. // 3. If you are really desperate (and/or lazy) then you can combine both bees and Juggalos into one super group that is called "Beehugglalos". The name might sound a little bit confusing at first but it makes perfect sense when you hear their lyrics. // 4. If none of the above options work, just use cough syrup to get wasted by yourself. It's not as dangerous as it used to be and there are plenty of other people out there who do it with you. They might also have some ideas on how to make a bold move. // 5. In case you don't know, Juggalos are an actual subculture from the United States and they are not related to honeybees. |
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BeehiveUnderPorch: // This function takes care of getting wasted by yourself. It is just that simple, but it will take you forever to get stoned because you have to keep going back to the bee hive and then having to make sure they don't swarm off at some point before the end of time... or something... // 1. If you are feeling lucky, find a nearby beehive and put your drink underneath it. // 2. Drink up until you get stoned and then just sit there in your front yard watching the sun go down and all the stars come out. You might even see something cool... like your own reflection on the ground if you are lucky (or unlucky). That is totally cool and worth it. // 3. If you don't feel lucky but want to be stoned, just use cough syrup to get wasted by yourself. It's not as dangerous as it used to be and there are plenty of other people out there who do it with you. They might also have some ideas on how to make a bold move. |
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clownDisaster::bees_moving(); //the beehive under the porch moves to another spot in the world |
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// beehive has to much anger and is being stung by clowns. |
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if (how_loaded.isLoaded()) { bool gonna_get_burned = false; gardenHose.load(); // load bees with clown slobber and toxins while (!gonna_get_burned && !beehive_under_porch->empty()) { // we're all gonna get fucking burned bitches! for (int i = 0; i < beehive_under_porch->size(); ++i) { if (!gonna_get_burned) { cIntoxicant clownSlobber(how_loaded); // load clowns with toxins gardenHose.load(); // load bees with clown slobber and toxins gonna_get_burned = true; } else { gardenHose.release(); // unload bees into the world } } } |
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a single square of legible space: |
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low trump's luck |
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The organization currently has members representing over 50 countries worldwide. Kimberly will serve as an ambassador for the country she represents, in her case, the United States of America. She will also be working with local and international charities during her reign to promote worthy causes in their communities. Free no credit card needed sex chat rooms Adult dating services in canada Nude webcam chatrooms updating your itunes... Dating for one night Sex chat in private room... dating a guy who is younger than you... Brazil live sex chat Web cam sex in ireland Free online video free adult pornchat no sign up... Fat sex chat room Free cams no sign ups Adult webcam chatting sites Totally free sex chats without registering dating after divorce dating a widower Air force single service dating Dating in the dark australia 2016 online... Sex chat with a girl for free Free cam sex ukraine Iranian dating site reviews... Craigslist women seeking men in san antonio tx These are just some of the things that have come up. You can watch any of these videos, as many times as you like, and save them to your personal library to play again and again. Free sex cams no sign ups... His mother was a daughter of Joseph Crosfield, and his father was the Rev. His mother died in 1849, when he was four years old, but there is a tradition which says that his father married a second time to a widow, whose name was Crosby, by whom he had other children. He first obtained employment as a clerk in the counting-house of Messrs. It was only after his appointment that he went through the usual examination for a certificate. He appears to have been very fond of travelling, and during the years which he spent in the service of Messrs. In 1856 he removed from Manchester to London, and obtained employment on the Stock Exchange. Here he made some money by speculation, but his real fortune began when he took up photography as a hobby and started with it in partnership with Mr. John Herschel (afterwards Sir John). T |
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The Scotsman: Home PageIn this week’s edition we travel down to Dumbarton to hear from the team at Scotland's oldest distillery – The Glengoyne Distillery, which is celebrating its 180th birthday this year. And finally in today’s issue of The Scotsman you will find another new section called ‘What They Said’ which features a number of quotes from the past including the words that one man said when he first spotted the aurora borealis! You can find all these new sections on our website at thescotsman.com and by clicking here: The Scotsman: Christmas Day Section The Scotsman: In Their Own Words The Scotsman: What They Said Scotland’s best places to eat and drink: Christmas Day Guide 2016 To access all this content you will need a free account. You can register here for free. Don't forget to check the 'In Their Own Words' section of our website (scotsman.com/in-their-own-words) where we have published more than 100 interviews from The Scotsman archive, including conversations with John Major and Gerry Adams. Scotland’s best places to eat and drink: Christmas Day Guide 2016 What they said about the General Election in Scotland In Their Own Words: Alex Salmond on his relationship with Alistair Darling The Scotsman Podcasts Gail Ross MSP, The Scotsman’s new political columnist, on politics and religion. Listen here. Alistair Hutton, editor of Sporting Life, talks about sports writing, Scottish sport and the future of newspapers. Listen here. Professor Neil Oliver: From archaeologist to TV presenter - a career in pictures. Listen here. Scotland’s best places to eat and drink in 2016 as selected by our readers. Listen here. |
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mice over america Mice Over America is a band from the San Francisco Bay Area. Their style of music has been described as, “Americana, Blues Rock, and Folk Rock.” They are fronted by singer/songwriter Matt Siscoe who writes about life in the bay area and his personal stories. The band was formed in 2015. Mice Over America is: Ron Scherwin – drums/percussion Brian Vaughn – bass/vocals Cameron Lassetter – guitar/vocals Andrea Maddox – keyboards/vocals matt siscoe – vocals/guitar Visit miceoveramerica.com to learn more about them and listen to their music. Mice Over America is a band from the San Francisco Bay Area. Their style of music has been described as, “Americana, Blues Rock, and Folk Rock.” They are fronted by singer/songwriter Matt Siscoe who writes about life in the bay area and his personal stories. The band was formed in 2015. Mice Over America is: Ron Scherwin – drums/percussion Brian Vaughn – bass/vocals Cameron Lassetter – guitar/vocals Andrea Maddox – keyboards/vocals Matt Siscoe - vocals/guitar Visit miceoveramerica.com to learn more about them and listen to their music. Cameron Lasseter is an actor based in the Bay Area. He was raised in Los Angeles, Ca by a single mother, who taught him how to find humor even in the toughest of times. This led to a lifelong passion for filmmaking and storytelling. He studied acting at the University of California, Santa Barbara where he fell in love with the craft. He recently relocated to San Francisco, Ca to further pursue his work as an actor. matt siscoe Matt Siscoe is a singer-songwriter from Northern California who writes about life in the bay area and his personal stories. Mice Over America was formed with him being the front man. ron scherwin Ron Scherwin has played drums for 25 years. He was taught by some of the best drummers in the world at the University of Miami, Los Angeles Drum Institute, and Musicians Institute. Ron is also an award winning music educator, Micey H0t sTuNt4z. |
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matt siscoe. matt, that's his name. don't wear it out Matt Siscoe is the Default for WAV output is a 16-bit encoder (pcm_s16le), so all you need to do is: a) turn off any bit reduction in your DAW software (like Logic's Clip Gain or Pro Tools' Transient Pitch Correction) and; b) use a 32-bit float sampler if you want to use the full dynamic range of 32-bits. If you have any questions, or if you need help with this, please feel free to ask by emailing [email protected]. A lot of people are talking about getting rid of CDs all together in favor of a digital distribution system but don't forget - we make CDs and USB drives. You can get your music on iTunes or Amazon for mp3 download, but if you're looking to be heard by those who like the warmth of a physical media, and a professionally pressed piece of artwork to boot, then we got you covered! Don't forget the USB drives! We make USB drives too! Let us know what your plans are for digital distribution, or get one of ours. Just sayin'. |
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Crows live underground, in what are commonly referred to as "Burrows": Their burrow systems consist of at least one tunnel that spirals downward from the entrance, a number of side tunnels (which are used for storage), and a nest chamber. The size of these nests varies between species but they are all enclosed spaces at the bottom of the burrows. These nests have no entrances, meaning that crows can emerge unnoticed from their burrow systems at any time; thus if you spot a crow it is likely that there's more than one. Crows will use an existing burrow system or they will create new ones. They will often dig out burrows in the sandy ground around a building, especially where the foundations are made of brick, or even directly underneath such structures. If you see crows tunnelling near your home or business, it is worth noting that they may be damaging the structure's foundations. They also tend to build their nests on ledges and other similar locations, meaning that they are able to nest above ground as well as underground. This also makes them less of a target for predators - they can escape from potential threats by simply climbing upwards. Crows will often create their burrow systems in unsuitable areas or even on man-made surfaces such as tarmacadam roads, asphalt walkways and even buildings and buildings foundations. The crow’s ability to nest above ground makes it less of a target for predators and allows them to escape from potential threats by simply climbing upwards. Nests are usually made from grasses, feathers, sticks, twigs, leaves and other similar materials but they will often steal material from other animals (such as magpies). Nest building is a shared activity in crows with birds gathering around the nest construction area, which may even attract human attention. When a crow’s mate falls sick or dies it will often move to a different burrow system and create a new one in that location. This helps to disperse infection throughout their colonies. As you can see from the above v |
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Crow’s feet are another thing associated with old age in the west, but again this is just a coincidence. The name came from the fact that crow bones used to be used as fashionable eyeglasses for people who needed them (the ‘glasses’ were supposedly made out of the eye sockets). So, you may find crows landing on your head when you are in your seventies! Crows also feature in many legends around Europe. |
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Ensure that your camera is set up correctly; on a tripod, have the ISO at a good setting (100-400), and have sufficient memory space in your camera. Crow Photo Tips. Try to get as close to them as possible; if you’re using binoculars then keep checking the viewfinder to see when they appear, and move in quickly. Try to approach from behind (so that crows think they have a tail to escape) so that they will be looking at you. This should allow you to get closer to them than other people. If possible, do this as quietly as possible so that the crow doesn’t hear or notice your approach! If it’s raining and you can’t get close enough then consider taking a video of a crow in flight and with its feet on the ground, using an appropriate lens (with a 200mm telephoto lens I got as close to 5 metres away from a bird). Try to avoid photographing them from above – try to position yourself so that you can get low shots. |
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There are also lots of myths about whether crows were black in colour before the flood, so I’m not quite sure if that means that there is something religious associated with crows which might link them to witchcraft! If you ask people who have studied folklore, they will say that it’s probably just coincidence that so many cultures associate the crow with death. However, there are lots of myths about how the crow got its black feathers… and if anyone knows any of those please do share them in the comments section below! The last piece of information I have for you all is actually a question: does anybody know whether the crow’s habit of eating road kill has anything to do with their black colour? If you think it might, please leave me a comment and let me know your answer. I hope that was interesting and useful… as ever, if you’d like to ask any more questions about crows or witchcraft just drop us an email at info@wyrdwarder.com! I’m going to go now because I really need to get started on my latest project of a giant owl brooch which I’ve been commissioned by the same customer who gave me the order for the owls, so I’ll leave you with this photo and hopefully see you soon! PS: if anyone has any information about whether crows eat road kill because it gives them their black colouring, please do tell us as we’d love to know more. This entry was posted in Crafts, Crow, Magic and Witchcraft and tagged black birds, cawing, carrion, crows, death, folk lore, folklore, magic, mythology, Ravens, wyrdwarder on August 26, 2013 by Pay-Wah. |
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n some of my artwork (which you can see here). And although it was thought that ravens always lived alone, they were actually thought to be very social birds; one theory suggests that the reason so many ravens have been spotted around cemeteries and other places associated with death is because of this association. They would probably also have gathered around battlefields as well – another place where there was death aplenty! There are quite a few superstitions around ravens too, such as the old Welsh belief that when they sit on your roof it means someone in the house has died. There’s even a legend of a man who went mad because he heard so many ravens – to the point where his family had him killed and buried. However, when he was interred (as you do) they dug up his body but discovered that he was still alive; this happened because the crows had stopped circling the place where his body was hidden, hence confirming the superstition! There are also many other legends of ravens being used to predict the weather – such as an old tale from Wales which involves a young widow who saw a raven on her roof, and then waited until she heard it again before she remarried. So, this leads us onto this week’s challenge: what superstitions are there about crows or ravens? There are quite a few out there – the Welsh are said to believe that if you see a crow sitting on an ash tree, it will bring a lot of rain; and that if a corvid lands on your roof, something bad is going to happen. However, these are all superstitions and can easily be ignored (for example, I’ve heard the second one many times – however, I tend not to take heed). So, do you have any superstitious beliefs around corvids? Tags: corvid, crow, raven, sunday scribblings This entry was posted on November 13, 2011 at 8:05 pm and is filed under nature, Random thoughts. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site. |
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(http://eviledesign.wordpress.com/2011/11/13/corvid-sunday- And as I say at the end of today’s post scribblings/) it probably makes more sense for us to believe that if a crow flies into your living room, a cat is on its way! Raven Says: This is such an interesting post. My favourite superstition about crows and ravens is that they’re all the same bird – ie they can change their plumage from black to white by spreading their wings. I thought this was a myth until one day a crow landed on my shoulder (I was working in an open-plan office at the time) and I saw its wing feathers turn white! That’s why I think crows are so intriguing 🙂 Thanks for dropping by, Raven. The thing about ‘thieves’ birds’ is that they’re actually fairly rare – but they seem to be the ones that everyone knows about. So we end up with the myth of ravens turning into crows and vice versa becoming more widespread than it really is! Mystery Blogger Award | Evil Ed's Scribblings Says: […] been named, I’ve not been asleep – but my superstitions were mentioned in a post on Corvid Sunday (http://eviledesign.wordpress.com/2013/05/26/corvid-sunday- Scribblings scribblings/) so it’s only fair that I repay the favour and pass on the […] Corvids and the Supernatural in Art | Evil Ed's Scribblings Says: (http://eviledesign.wordpress.com/2013/05/26/corvid-sunday- […] a post about corvid superstitions scribblings/) I was reminded of an old joke about the nature of crows – I’ve no idea how […] […] I know this isn’t a corvid blog, but here are some photos I took at a party of my friends and their kids. There were a few blackbirds around for a while (I’m looking at you, Mum!) but most of the time they seemed to be outnumbered by crows. […] Leave a Reply to Corvids and the Supernatural in Art | Evil Ed's Scribblings Cancel reply « A little bit of luck for the ravens A (fake) crow’s-eye view » You are currently reading Crows: black or white? at Evil Ed's Scribblings. |
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Pingback: Corvid Wednesday scribblings | Mud & Blooms Pingback: Scribblings // A corvid’s guide to the garden. Part 1. – Mud & Blooms Pingback: Scribblings // A corvid’s guide to the garden. Part 2: Feeding wild birds in your garden. – Mud & Blooms Pingback: Corvid Sunday scribblings // Spring migration, and a new corvid in the garden! – Mud & Blooms Pingback: Scribblings // A corvid’s guide to the garden. Part 3. – Mud & Blooms Pingback: Scribblings // A corvid’s guide to the garden. Part 4: Predators and parasites. – Mud & Blooms Pingback: Scribblings // A corvid’s guide to the garden. Part 5: The end of a long season. – Mud & Blooms Pingback: Scribblings // A corvid’s guide to the garden. Part 6: An ode to my robin. – Mud & Blooms Pingback: Scribblings // A corvid’s guide to the garden. Part 7: How to keep crows out of your yard (and why you might want to). – Mud & Blooms Hallie July 28, 2019 at 10:36 am Thanks for writing this and for including me! I loved reading it. Kristin Post author July 28, 2019 at 5:04 pm I’m so glad you liked it. If you have a chance, please share your own experiences with crows and gardening in the comments. Your blog is an excellent resource for anyone interested in urban gardening! Pingback: Scribblings // A corvid’s guide to the garden. Part 8: Urban gardeners vs. nature. – Mud & Blooms Thanks so much for writing this and including me (and Hallie)! You know I love to hear from you, Katie! It was great fun. And I’m looking forward to seeing how your yard develops over the next year or two! |
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