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UFOs
 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-07 07:50 [#02624950]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



R. A. Wilson had a pretty good shtick going. he said, "i
see UFOs all the time. a few a week, generally!" and, well,
no one's saying it's aliens; it's just an object in the sky
that he cannot identify, and he's seen it. and that's the
joke.

but i do get the sense that this joke has begun to backfire
in a way that is awful, but, well, still actually kind of
funny.

it was probably about a year ago, last winter, way
before the spy balloon crap... that i'm out walking at
night, and i stop on a bridge, and... this is nuts, i can't
tell what are stars and what aren't. i look at something for
a bit and determine it's actually a stationary hovering
aircraft of some sort. helicopters will hover over the
highway for speeders, but they have some lights, usually,
and... ugh god this creeps me out. i don't understand the
sky anymore

anyone in the US freaking over this balloon, it's kind of
like... i'm sorry, the skies are already full of UFOs, and
it's not fucking aliens, but it's starting to feel like less
of a joke.

drone teabagging: attach teabag to your drone. navigate to
slightly above other drone. gently lower teabag into
propellers


 

offline RussellDust on 2023-02-07 08:48 [#02624953]
Points: 16065 Status: Regular



Sometimes it’s a blip in dimensions, according to Jacques
Vallée. He deduced (after working on this for a few
governments) that the proper UFOs don’t come from outer
space by rather other dimensions. He argued it could often
be accidental or a glitch.

I’ve had a couple of experiences I’ll never forget.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-07 09:15 [#02624954]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



well, maybe, i don't know. i'm more concerned with what we
have developing in our dimension. that i found myself, on a
bridge, staring up at the sky, and what's a star, what's a
drone, what's man-made, what's real? and i very earnestly
thought: "i don't understand the sky anymore"

and that's almost at, like, mushrooms or schizophrenia
level: "the sky is wrong" etc. except i've none of that,
totally sober actually, and after hearing myself think "i
don't understand the sky anymore" i felt quite uneasy.

all those sci-fi futures where there are strings of ships
all over the sky. what will that do to how animals use the
sky? no one's thought about much of this really


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-07 09:16 [#02624955]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



and again, that was like, a year ago.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-07 09:26 [#02624956]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



i am serious about this being a sneaking change potential.
but i can't help but be at least a little amusing: after
picard's borg episode, he visits the family vineyard in
france with his brother and etc. and there's all this
"natural countryside" but you do not see a single animal
the whole episode
not even a squirrel. or maybe they
have a dog, but... there are no animals. and this is just
perfect to spin into some sort of fruitcake conspiracy
theory about ST:TNG. if anyone is bored


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2023-02-08 23:04 [#02625010]
Points: 31038 Status: Regular | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02624956



Squirrels were assimilated by the Borg, they do all the
shitty maintenance jobs on the cube like run wiring through
conduits and shave the collective when their hair gets too
long


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-08 23:12 [#02625012]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular | Followup to Hyperflake: #02625010



wrong, wrong, utterly wrong. you're thinking of ferrets.


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2023-02-09 01:24 [#02625013]
Points: 31038 Status: Regular | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02625012



Ferrets are federation only, The Borg Queen tried to stuff
some down her trousers and it backfired , Jefferies tubes
are full of the bastards


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-09 01:29 [#02625014]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



i think the truth is even more horrible. there are no birds,
no bugs, no squirrels, no ferrets -- because picard is not
on 24th century earth, he's trapped in a soundstage in
burbank in the early 90s. and they don't allow birds into
those. not only do the borg have a cruel sense of humor, but
they have very strict rules.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-09 01:33 [#02625015]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



that, yes, i am implying that the borg traveled back in time
to write, produce, and film ST:TNG. sleep well


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-09 02:03 [#02625016]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



maybe it does warrant more of an explain.

perhaps, if it goes as it went in ST:TNG -- not sending hugh
back to the borg with [impossible fractal holographic puzzle
designed to clog the collective] -- that would have been
disastrous for the federation.

...because, in the "real" future, picard was all "yeah this
hugh kid will hit like the melissa virus" and sent hugh back
to the borg with a giggle.

and it fractured the collective.

and they sent a small contingent back in time to write,
produce, and film ST:TNG with the idea to change precisely
one crucial decision by planting the idea in our minds
hundreds of years ago.

and they brought picard back, and he's trapped in a
soundstage in burbank in the 90s

and that's why it looks like he's on a soundstage in burbank
in the 90s instead of on 24th century earth, in france. it
makes so much sense

really, though, be careful with that one. it's actually
rather hard to prove that certain sci-fi shows aren't
subtle psy-ops from time-line meddlers far in the future.

next, its: well, alright, so what could they...

then some noises; your head hurts a lot. you start to
develop migraines

no, don't think on that too hard.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-09 02:15 [#02625017]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



as futuristic time-travelling entities, you can travel back
to the 90s and create something like ST:TNG to do any number
of things: give us a playbook to guide our development. or
tell us the world is flat; lock us up in some looping bubble
to keep us contained. or maybe that's that point, no going
anywhere you humans until you think your way out of this
timeline we've set you on


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-09 02:20 [#02625018]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



i got utterly lost in turning ST:TNG into an episode of
ST:TNG there
i'm out for a zig. and to write a tv show


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-10 21:14 [#02625076]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



BOSTON - There’s a new drinking trend being talked
about on college campuses across the nation that is raising
concern among some doctors.

A drink called the borg, which stands for “blackout rage
gallon”, is making regular appearances on TikTok and other
social media platforms.

Dr. Colangelo calls the very nature of the borg
“uncontrolled drinking”.



 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2023-02-10 22:00 [#02625079]
Points: 7845 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



are they seriously trying to catch speeders with helis?
the fuel costs a fortune!
gotta be some mad max maniacs to be worth the catch.
i mean like flaming guitars and shit,
chasing a tanker with filled to the brim
with kerosine if you catch my drift.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-11 03:53 [#02625084]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular | Followup to ijonspeches: #02625079



are they seriously trying to catch speeders with helis?
the fuel costs a fortune! gotta be some mad max maniacs to
be worth the catch.


yes. no. sorta. the copopopter is not like that.

a) [no] it wasn't like that

probably twenty years, yes, they flapapap teh copopopter to
catch speeders. but they have one helicopter hover over good
stretches of highway and then just radio in anyone that
looks like a juicy catch; units on the ground get 'em or
don't. then when rush hour dies down they go back to roost.




b) [yes] now it sort of is

more stationary coptopters flapApp flap i think they just
got too much budget now they just sit in the copoopoopter
and eat donuts and mess with a fleet of drones using
joysticks

c) [sorta] whatever about the actual helicopters; they don't
really bother me. it's just, like... yeah, that's a drone. i
think. suspect that over there is, too. it fucking bothers
me. i haven't wanted to hack something this bad since high
school


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-14 15:09 [#02625235]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



i saw the "metallic octagonal craft" description -- not a
balloon, for sure -- and my immediate thought was something
mythbusters did once, which is an ion-propelled aircraft

it's like a gram per watt of lift... but you can do it as a
science experiment with some tin foil at home, provided you
tether it to the ground to provide power.

and i thought that was that, but, hey... it's been a
while... and a private company demo'd one that can fly about
for a few minutes... if you figure the militaries are a
generation or two ahead...

yeah. similar to a balloon, i can see a very light fluttery
ion-propelled craft being good for surveillance. so dainty
it's even harder to spot. utterly silent. hard part
is powering it really


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2023-02-14 16:04 [#02625238]
Points: 7845 Status: Regular | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02625235 | Show recordbag



you mean the same military that doesnt have anything
functionable in their arsenal? no, wait, thats the german
military ^^ but hey we just sell all the good stuff.

a) and b) are mad
and i fucking hate drones,
except for great air shots in film

hacking those would be pretty cool,
you could hijack a ton of em and build a huge flying statue
of george orwell flying into the anus of an even bigger
statue of idk..


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2023-02-14 16:06 [#02625239]
Points: 7845 Status: Regular | Followup to ijonspeches: #02625238 | Show recordbag



acutally that could be kind of a realistic animation.
i call it drone bone


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-14 21:24 [#02625244]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



dear chatGPT,

create a python script that:

1) hacks drones within range
2) gently eases them into the duck pond in front of the
police station, unless there is any danger to civilians on
the ground

...that's about my feeling. and i don't care who owns them
-- china, the cops, my neighbors, whoever. fuck off. get...
out from over my lawn?


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-14 21:28 [#02625245]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



i'm down if someone wants to manually pilot one to do things
like... real estate flyovers of houses, that's a cool idea.
you come over and if i even notice, oh, they're droning the
house, and i would actually find that cool

but, what makes me like... if i didn't know, yes, this is
real... i'd worry i was losing my mind. there's a tech
company that, i am really pretty sure, has been using drones
to monitor their complex. but they're just way off around
their thing. but just seeing loads of hovering crap in the
sky, not knowing what it is... as elon's starlink leaves a
skidmark across the sky...

starlink is alright. cautiously optimistic. but it's just
another worrying variable on other levels


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-14 21:30 [#02625246]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



but, yeah. to (tldr -> venn center) us both:

a) there are some totally fine legitimate uses for drones
that can even be cool
b) the random dark swarms can go fuck themselves


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-14 21:33 [#02625247]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



oh hell i totally forgot to link this

FUCK YES there are helicopters, wasting loads of
petrol. for crap as charming as this


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-14 21:39 [#02625248]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



that again, i don't mind the helicopters. sometimes i stare
at them as i walk and wonder if they can freaking tell. i
doubt it. mostly, though, the police ones watch the
highways, and it's kind of like a community bulletin,
really... that if i hear them off somewhere unusual i know
somethings up. a few times, like... i hear them over yonder,
so i start walking in that direction, until... that's a lot
of smoke... i hear fire engines... good enough; turning
around now

then the medivac helicopters buzz by and make more noise
than the police ones.

...and that's it; they're deafeningly obvious. they use tons
of petrol and they can only watch only little bits at a
time. a bunch of drones hovering forever in a snooze, trying
to be inconspicuous... infinitely more obnoxious. should be
illegal.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-14 21:46 [#02625249]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



there are plenty that are... that's not a star, that's not a
helicopter. it's lit up though. it's not moving. ok, that's
a drone.

then there are ones that are much more dimly lit up, you
note.

finally, there are some that are not lit up at all, and you
only catch vary sparingly, via occlusion. like, walking a
stretch, a star gradually darks out and comes back, and...
you dicks.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-14 21:47 [#02625250]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



but, my "oh my god the sky is full of them" moment was,
perhaps, two years ago. it's strange to be somewhat relevant


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2023-02-14 21:51 [#02625251]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



occlusion (computing) The blocking of the view of
part of an image by another


 


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