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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-10 19:30 [#02624057]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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I have nothing against The Gays but the likelihood of me licking a man's bum hole is zero.
Sorry if that lets anyone down.
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RussellDust
on 2023-01-10 21:26 [#02624058]
Points: 16065 Status: Regular | Followup to Roger Wilco: #02624057
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You would! I’m sure I could think of the right circumstance and (famous) person. Like a dare, or « as a joke », maybe to « see what it’s like ».
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RussellDust
on 2023-01-10 21:28 [#02624059]
Points: 16065 Status: Regular
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Imagine an end of day lump of jacked off jizz! I wonder if it would move a bit…
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RussellDust
on 2023-01-10 21:30 [#02624060]
Points: 16065 Status: Regular
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That is the jizz excreted that day in the whole world. Only counting wanks (bad sperm).
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-11 03:34 [#02624062]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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You fucking.... Mexican!
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-crazone
from smashing acid over and over on 2023-01-11 06:24 [#02624063]
Points: 11234 Status: Lurker | Show recordbag
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Zwenģggggĝ
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mermaidman
on 2023-01-11 12:31 [#02624065]
Points: 8308 Status: Regular | Followup to Roger Wilco: #02624057
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maybe a whiff??
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Tony Danza
from NAFO Suicide Hotline on 2023-01-11 14:01 [#02624067]
Points: 3647 Status: Regular
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Turkish delight
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-11 16:08 [#02624068]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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I've just been violently ill.
Everywhere.
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-11 16:50 [#02624069]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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If it sounds like Gescom then it probably is.
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-11 17:19 [#02624071]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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Snoopy. Snoop Dogg. Snow Princess. Snope from those shit Star Wars films. Snow Patrol. Or white Canadian rapper Snow.
Do you see where I'm going with this?
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Tony Danza
from NAFO Suicide Hotline on 2023-01-14 20:33 [#02624179]
Points: 3647 Status: Regular
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I'm painfully aware of your genitals
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-15 09:58 [#02624194]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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It's OK not to always be happy.
It's OK to be afraid.
It's OK to not feel in control.
It's OK to be abused.
It's OK to be physically assaulted.
It's OK to have your liberty taken away.
It's OK not to be OK. OK?
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-15 11:32 [#02624198]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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I bet you can't even say Jungle Bunny these days without some Gen Z militant leaping on you *smh*
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-15 11:40 [#02624201]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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Alright, so I had an affair with Wolf Bkitzer. I've got over it, my partner's got over it, Wolf's got over it. So why can't you?
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2023-01-15 20:59 [#02624216]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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I have nothing against The Gays but the likelihood of me licking a man's bum hole is zero.
that's not what i said. interesting that's where your mind went
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-16 15:24 [#02624232]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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Well, if you're going to have gay sex then presumably you're going to lick their arsehole. Can someone back me up on this? Ideally a gay.
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RussellDust
on 2023-01-16 15:56 [#02624237]
Points: 16065 Status: Regular | Followup to Roger Wilco: #02624232
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I’m not an authority but I expect it’s like with heterosexuals or other types: some like it some don’t.
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-16 16:21 [#02624241]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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I feel like farting on somebody's knee
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Tony Danza
from NAFO Suicide Hotline on 2023-01-16 16:28 [#02624243]
Points: 3647 Status: Regular
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Why is the halal economy booming?
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-16 17:15 [#02624244]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker | Followup to RussellDust: #02624237
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I think your use of a colon was a dog whistle.
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2023-01-16 18:05 [#02624245]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular | Followup to Roger Wilco: #02624232
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Well, if you're going to have gay sex then presumably you're going to lick their arsehole. Can someone back me up on this? Ideally a gay.
that russell is effectively correct:
I’m not an authority but I expect it’s like with heterosexuals or other types: some like it some don’t.
that even amongst heterosexuals, i would add, there is a dichotomy: few dislike it outright, but there's a sharp divide between who wants the tongue going past the seal, and who doesn't. i actually don't. i'm too uptight to enjoy things going that far up my bum. even though i do sort of wish i weren't. but i did have a boyfriend where, like, we'd wake up, and he'd be like "can you please sit on my face" and for all your sexual adventures you've never had this?
really, though, just thinking: a few beers and 30mg of adderall and roger wilco would totally do some guy up the ass in a closet, because, well, it's still an ass, and oh this ass looks rather good actually. just a general extension of his appetites; arguably not even gay. just, oh, hell, let's have a fuck
but if he's asking such ignorant questions about rimming, well, i guess i gave him too much credit
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Tony Danza
from NAFO Suicide Hotline on 2023-01-16 20:23 [#02624250]
Points: 3647 Status: Regular
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[Morgan Freeman voice] you ask me if I eat ass, sonny. Let me tell you, sonny, I've done 40 years in this house of corrections, 35 of them with a daisy chain of hardcore prison dick right up my bitch ass. You better believe I eat ass, sonny, and I damned well made myself learn to like it.
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2023-01-16 22:26 [#02624256]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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prison jokes, right. it's kind of funny because [morgan freeman voice] but i'd argue that no one eats ass in prison, generally. it's a bunch of horny straight men and they're not going to ask for that. or so i imagine. i really don't know if that's as widespread as joked about anyways.
people have told me incredibly contrived jokes like this and i'm not really laughing and they're all "if you're gay i don't mean any offense" and then i'll say "well i like women too" and, then -- the definitive moment -- the guy says, "i have lots of gay friends"
"i have lots of gay friends" is basically a polite way of saying "i am a homophobic dick, not in a lynch fags way, but in an immature high school way, and when i say 'i have a lots of gay friends' i mean 'i am going to go off to others as soon as i'm out of earshot and be all DID YOU KNOW HE'S GAY?'" and they miss the part where i'm all "effing heck, no one gets up on a mountain and declares `i'm straight.` should i put `i'm bisexual` on my business card? if so, why don't you put "STRAIGHT" on your resume? THAT THIS IS ANNOYING you asked i told"
i think, actually, what i'm missing is this: the problem is that the joke simply wasn't funny. i wasn't offended. then you thought i was, and it all went off into that predictable avulsion. but, no, i was just flat because that was a dumb-ass joke. and instead of saying, "well yeah but what the fuck ever" i should just sidestep that and say: no, your joke just sucked
tony: your joke just sucked.
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2023-01-16 23:04 [#02624259]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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poor lad. let me show you. here, i'll take the tangent you were trying for, and glue it into a liberal joke
communal rimming is traditional in certain parts of vermont
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Tony Danza
from NAFO Suicide Hotline on 2023-01-17 00:37 [#02624267]
Points: 3647 Status: Regular
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[Morgan Freeman voice] Morgan Freeman ate ass to prepare for his role. Or so I imagine.
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Tony Danza
from NAFO Suicide Hotline on 2023-01-17 01:38 [#02624270]
Points: 3647 Status: Regular
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In all honesty, I believe a man or a woman may eat a woman's ass as long as she has good hygiene and is not harbouring urgent fudge.
But neither man nor woman may eat of the man's ass. Thus saith The LORD.
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-17 08:37 [#02624276]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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The Lord put hair on Man's bumhole for a reason: to serve as a warning.
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mermaidman
on 2023-01-17 11:28 [#02624278]
Points: 8308 Status: Regular | Followup to Roger Wilco: #02624276
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BUT women have hairy bumholes too
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-17 11:42 [#02624279]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker | Followup to mermaidman: #02624278
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*Chuckles* Actual women don't.
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mermaidman
on 2023-01-18 08:27 [#02624300]
Points: 8308 Status: Regular | Followup to Roger Wilco: #02624279
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:O
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2023-01-18 09:01 [#02624311]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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Q: why did god give us nipple hair? it is horrible. it is unforgivable
A: to keep from chafing thine nipples
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2023-01-18 09:02 [#02624312]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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don't ever image search "jogger's nipple"
(unless you want to say: "yep, i did this to myself")
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2023-01-18 09:06 [#02624313]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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someone i knew since school back whentransgender and alright, what? that actually some very honest discussions. that she compensated for not really, like... getting how to be male... by massively overdoing it; too aggro. going overseas and getting shot at. and maybe roger wilco is just so loudly, crisply heterosexual... no, not that. he's just insecure and it's compulsive
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Tony Danza
from NAFO Suicide Hotline on 2023-01-18 13:27 [#02624318]
Points: 3647 Status: Regular
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You're listening to NPR.
Coming up, a tiny desk concert with Trust Fund Polycule.
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-19 11:13 [#02624340]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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The Metropolitan Sex Tourist's Guide to Mozambique.
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-19 11:39 [#02624341]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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Power On and Connect
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-19 12:07 [#02624343]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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Start your adventure. In Addis Ababa.
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-19 12:11 [#02624344]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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Now playing: Biosphere.
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-19 12:12 [#02624345]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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He gives off real "Sleeps in his car" energy
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-19 12:21 [#02624346]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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Actual Pitchfork headline: "Cole Pulice’s Ambient Saxophone Multiverse"
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-19 12:56 [#02624347]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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Multi-Bum Behaviour
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Tony Danza
from NAFO Suicide Hotline on 2023-01-19 13:01 [#02624348]
Points: 3647 Status: Regular | Followup to Roger Wilco: #02624346
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oh no, oh lord
it was worth googling that for the picture of cole pulice
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-19 13:06 [#02624350]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker | Followup to Tony Danza: #02624348
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I am sorry. I had to see it and I think it's only fair that you do too.
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Tony Danza
from NAFO Suicide Hotline on 2023-01-19 16:02 [#02624351]
Points: 3647 Status: Regular
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In the old days we had Steve Jobs, Johnny Cash and The Police.
Now we have no jobs, no cash and Cole Pulice.
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Roger Wilco
from Mo's Beans on 2023-01-20 15:29 [#02624385]
Points: 1998 Status: Lurker
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It sounds too crazy to be true but Ringo Starr's name isn't Ringo Starr.
It's actually something else, I don't remember the details.
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2023-01-26 08:51 [#02624623]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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studies have indicated, for example, that male younger siblings in larger families are statistically likely to be gay may younger siblings. following up on this, science discovered that -- kind of unnerving, actually -- that the testosterone involved in being pregnant with a boy can, in a woman, something something, and there's a sort of increasing reaction with further boys borne.
that, oh... maybe... the first-born is earmarked for king; the spare is optionally gay? and with each further spare; potentially more gay? margay? in any case, i feel this makes statistical sense: if the selective pressure is the monarchy shit; let the rest be satisfied up the bum and run the infrastructure or something.
(richard james starkey)
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2023-01-26 08:58 [#02624626]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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that's the hardware part. software? imprinting
that this is one of those, just... god bless science moments
that konrad lorenz discovered that newly-hatched ducks would "imprint" on whatever they saw after birth, and he had what was arguably so much fun with it to the point that it marginally blurred ethics like the legitimacy of a duck fucking a ping-pong ball
that, the newly-hatched ducks would imprint on whatever they saw after birth, be it a ping-pong ball, a cigarette lighter, or even konrad lorenz himself. there are photos of the ducks following him around like mama, along with less animate objects. when they came of age, the ducks would then attempt to mate with... the ping pong balls... or the cigarette lighter... or... well, konrad had to fend off some amorous ducks to be sure
and to me this very deftly explains many things, particularly the diversity of kink. it's actually more rare for someone to not have something. but it can be boring, too, no worries, like chicks in champion sweatshirts just feels comfy
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2023-01-26 09:00 [#02624627]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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the next step from here is the catholic church very crudely trying to automap everyone's fetishes to their desired knobs like tony danza crafting a reaktor plugin
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2023-01-26 09:06 [#02624628]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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mermaidtran (n): imprinted on drama
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Messageboard index
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