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 (nobody)...and 186 guests Last 5 registered Oplandisks nothingstar N_loop yipe foxtrotromeo Browse members... |
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Members 8025Messages 2613408 Today 0 Topics 127499 |
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Apple’s software engineers were so haunted by a gag in The Simpsons they spent years trying to nail the keyboard in the iPhone. As part of an ‘oral history’ — essentially a lot of interviews sewn together — about the Californian company, Fast Company interviewed dozens of former Apple execs. One particularly juicy tidbit it’s just revealed is that software engineers working on the iPhone were traumatised by the Simpsons making fun of the ancient Newton tablet’s handwriting recognition in 1995. "In the hallways [at Apple] and while we were talking about the keyboard, you would always hear the words ‘Eat Up Martha’,” says Nitin Ganatra, formerly Apple’s director of engineering for iOS. “We needed to nail the keyboard. We needed to make sure the text input works on this thing, otherwise, ‘Here comes the Eat Up Marthas.'" |
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My boss is in hospital and I've just thundered out a turd. |
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That is the funniest thing I have ever written, please remember it when I am dead. |
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Imagine if your turd was haunted by steve jobs and his smiling manifested on it just as you were about to flush |
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I like that. Maybe we can collaborate on a series of Haunted Turd Tales? |
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yeah a collection of short storied, Davis Dickinson possessed my colon |
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The Strange Case of Pol Pot and the Portaloo. |
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Pol Plop |
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"it was a chilly, damp December morning, I arose from the relative comfort of my cosy bedspread and kneeled upon the padded ottoman that faced the window overlooking my back garden" "At first glance nothing appeared out of the ordinary, the same mundane view that I had always apprehended in my minds eye. The thick dull, dew clad grass, the stark naked apple tree, gently shivering in the invisible breeze" "Yet suddenly in the periphery of my sleep clad eyes, movement, yes down there by the shed, unmistakable a ghoulish figure was crouching over the septic tank, inhaling the foul vapours that were starkly emanating in the winter atmosphere. "shaking I grabbed the phone from the near by desk, a dull icicle of horror wormed its way down across my spine" unable to take my eyes from this unholy view my fear became sharp with intensity as the face of the apparition swivelled slowly, inhumanly into view like an giant owl. There below, staring back at me with a manic grin, a shit smeared upper lip was Alan Titsmarsh, his right hand overflowing with excremental matter, his left hand wrapped tightly around his shrivelled twig like member" |
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Placing the standing full-length mirror at the end of the bed, Sir Timothy lay down on his back and lowered his pyjama bottoms. Raising his legs heavenward, his shaking hands grasped a buttock apiece and, unhappily, he eased his cleft open. After a minute's prayer he reluctantly lifted his head and peered between his legs to look at the reflecting glass. He gasped, time ground to a halt. Where a man's anus should be instead appeared the leering face of TV entertainer Matthew Kelly. Sir Timothy stared disbelieving for an instant, farted weakly, then mercifully fell into unconsciousness. |
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lol |
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