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offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2019-06-25 07:39 [#02581158]
Points: 5265 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



what season?
the season where its hotter than hell in the afternoon.
the season where anytime between 7:00 and 18:00 o clock you
open a window or walk the strrets you unwillingly bear
witness of the green area chainsaw massacre.
why is it any public space needs to be cut down to the bare
soil just to immediately turn into a barren wasteland. is it
the lizards peoples plot or are we just that stupid? anytime
i hear this noise i want to punch someone in the face. not
necessarily the poor bloke who was forced into that bullshit
job. but how about those idiots who use their deafening
leafblowers to blow leaves off their sidewalk across to the
neighbours side. mostly i try to stare them down all the way
i walk towards and past them. but back on topic,
whats it like where you live?
does the city/council etc meticulously prevent and destroy
any tiny blossoms of life?
do you live in constant noise pollution during summer?
did you ever atttempt to plant a bomb in your neighbours
mower when he kept it running for the better half of a day
while being busy elsewhere?


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-25 08:16 [#02581159]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



Why dont you take the train and head to london, such a
victory


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2019-06-25 08:29 [#02581160]
Points: 5265 Status: Regular | Followup to mohamed: #02581159 | Show recordbag



what do you mean?
talking bout the park areas?


 

offline Indeksical from Phobiazero Damage Control (United Kingdom) on 2019-06-25 08:32 [#02581161]
Points: 10161 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



weather's shit in the UK at the mo.


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-25 10:26 [#02581164]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Followup to ijonspeches: #02581160 | Show recordbag



Yeah, where the grass is so dried up you can feed it to
camels as straw


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-25 10:27 [#02581165]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



Sorry just being a clown


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2019-06-25 11:08 [#02581167]
Points: 5265 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



was all lush when i was there.
been waiting to say this word for a long time.
in germany "english lawn" is a term for trimmed btw.
it has its pro in terms of usage and its cons in terms of
ecology, climate and looks. what i dont get is that
seemingly any pubic area that is not paved, desertification
is the prefrred result.



 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-25 15:53 [#02581188]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



that moment you see a squirrel in a london park and you
didnt know it


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-25 16:09 [#02581189]
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i like cities with docks. Genua, Rome, Milan. lol.


 

online Roger Wilco from nude idol on 2019-06-25 16:24 [#02581190]
Points: 639 Status: Addict



I too have experience some, if not all of the vexatious
phenomena that ijonspeches complains of. There does seem to
be some compulsion to seize any moment of peace, or soothing
space, and grind it noisily into choking, fume-scented dust.
Every Saturday morning without fail some cunt starts up some
petrol leaf-blower/trimmer/whatever... some random noise
generator making m close the window. Of course, they're
taking it easy so there's no rush to finish what they;re
doing, leisurely fucking everything up in case any
might suffer the terrible fate of being quiet.


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2019-06-25 16:46 [#02581191]
Points: 25459 Status: Addict



worst is the twat with the range rover over the road who
sometimes revs his engine for half an hour in the drive way
for no apparently reason, the cunt also has spotlights that
come on of a night for no apparent reason, then there is the
druggy/alcoholic guy who shouts "billy, billy" and whistles
for his mate rather than ringing his door bell like everyone
else would, what a complete cunt he is


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-25 19:19 [#02581198]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



ah well fuck it, english lawns trending atmo


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-25 19:29 [#02581199]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



wow just had a deja vu


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2019-06-25 19:57 [#02581201]
Points: 25459 Status: Addict



good name for an umbroman album "English lawns and welsh
castles"


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2019-06-26 00:21 [#02581221]
Points: 12852 Status: Regular | Followup to Roger Wilco: #02581190



man blowing goats with his goat blower


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2019-06-26 00:21 [#02581222]
Points: 12852 Status: Regular



"there is no power tool more american than the leaf blower
-- a loud piece of shit that blows trash everywhere"
--twitter, somewhere, sometime


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2019-06-26 00:30 [#02581223]
Points: 12852 Status: Regular



my commute drives me crazy for these sort of reasons. people
who get on the train and fart. people who get on the train
and talk loudly on their cell phones. people who rush to get
in front of me, and then walk slow as molasses, blocking the
sidewalk, lost in their cell phone. how i've given up
waiting for people to stop so i can cross the street -- if i
just stand patiently at the crosswalk, car after car will
ignore me and drive by. how another crosswalk has a walk
signal, but it takes a good minute or three to click in, and
then lasts about ten seconds before the blinking red hand.
cars will rush in trying to make the light, and someone else
is trying to right turn on red on the other side, and i have
five seconds to get across the street and some fucking
mercedes is barrelling down and reluctantly slams on
the brakes to avoid hitting me. how dare i make them wait?
they're flooring it before i've even reached the sidewalk.
then on to the entrance of the house of organized religion.
multiple times, people have been waiting to turn, seen me
walking, and moved their car forward to block the driveway,
so i can't walk in front of them. the 7/11 near the station
is even worse in this regard

...and, yes, i have hated leaf blowers since i was quite
young. i like to sleep in, and people seem to like winding
them out next to my open window at 8am

i generally just call them fuckers under my breath and move
on... but, given that this is a daily thing, and i have a
good memory, i have this ever-expanding catalog of asshole
things assholes have done and statistics on how often and
where and it starts to feel like a form of purgatory


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2019-06-26 00:48 [#02581224]
Points: 12852 Status: Regular



i dunno. the anger i feel is not really a mano-a-mano thing.
it's more: hey, no, people like you are what ruin everyone's
day. then i want to be like that soccer mom who walks up to
people and bitches them out: you're behaving terribly.
you're ruining the atmosphere for everyone around you. then
i have to remind myself that it is not my place in life to
mete out karma; take a deep breath


 

offline Tony Danza from Hillary 2020 on 2019-06-26 00:49 [#02581225]
Points: 1737 Status: Addict



I too loathe obstreperous lawn mechanism season and pine for
the return of cardigan weather.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2019-06-26 00:53 [#02581226]
Points: 12852 Status: Regular



what i do instead: actually stop for pedestrians who are
patiently waiting for the cars to stop


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2019-06-26 00:53 [#02581227]
Points: 12852 Status: Regular | Followup to Tony Danza: #02581225



cardigan weather, wasn't that some punk band?


 

offline Tony Danza from Hillary 2020 on 2019-06-26 01:30 [#02581231]
Points: 1737 Status: Addict | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02581227



Which is ironic because you can tell from the name that they
started out twee. their bassist Frowning John went on to
form Owl Socket.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2019-06-26 01:33 [#02581232]
Points: 12852 Status: Regular



when i was in high school, we went on a school trip to
france. it was a small school and so we were very precisely
sliced up into units. my computer nerd friends and i, my
sister and her crowd, the three people who actually played
sports, etc. and all of us were assigned an adult minder to
ensure we did all the things, and didn't do the things we
weren't supposed to do.

my group was assigned to the headmaster's wife. i had no
issue with her at first -- didn't even know her, frankly --
but she rapidly drove us up the wall. some adults would
allow their groups to roam, because they were our teachers
and they knew all of us and there was trust. but, this lady
didn't trust us at all, and was always bitching at us to
stay in her sight. then she'd want to go some fancy upscale
france bit and we only wanted crepes, only had the money for
crepes. we were not jerks, or bad kids, but after a bit of
this, well... we'd just scatter in three directions and meet
up around the corner. then she'd find us and get mad. rinse
and repeat. had she just let us be, we wouldn't have gotten
into anything.

one morning, the phone rings. i'm half asleep, and some guy
is jabbering in french. i do not speak french. i assume it's
a wrong number; hang up.

turns out, it was the wakeup call. we are still asleep when
everyone else is on the bus. this irritating sow, who always
insisted we stay in her sight, had not even noticed we were
not on the bus. someone else doing the headcount figured
that one out.

later that day, she began doing her usual "don't go more
than ten feet from me" shit, and i gave her a piece of my
mind. how she had no right to act like that, given her gross
dereliction of duty that morning.

being the headmaster's wife, i got in trouble. it was
actually quite tense, i essentially doubled-down when the
headmaster pressed me on it, and told him she was an idiot
(albeit phrased more politely).


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2019-06-26 01:39 [#02581233]
Points: 12852 Status: Regular



he's furious. he's threatening academic whatever, the thing
where they have a hearing and decide whether i get detention
or what. on a school trip in france. because his wife is an
obnoxious sow. i am told by most everyone -- including some
teachers, even -- that i'm right, that they don't even think
he can do that here, according to the school code, and how
the fuck are you going to give me detention? and that it
felt like that sometimes, already, with his wife?

my parents were notified and my dad rang the hotel room.
i'll never forget it. he told me: you're right, but you have
to apologize, to defuse it.

it went against every fiber of my being, but i did it. i
went to his room, knocked on the door, and personally
apologized.

he got over it pretty quickly. i was given a token single
day of detention when i got back -- the only one i've ever
had to serve.

so, yes, i've thought a great deal about how to handle
situations where people are being intolerable. ratcheting up
pressure only makes them moreso. everyone hates the soccer
mom bitching someone out. when someone's being an asshole on
the train -- talking loudly, eating smelly food -- some
people get annoyed. then, annoyed, they act like jerks to
other people, who also then get annoyed, and turn into
jerks. annoyance because a contagion spreading the disease
of jerk. non-participation is generally the best answer


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2019-06-26 01:42 [#02581234]
Points: 12852 Status: Regular



sometimes, though, you get a moment: an SUV is on your
bumper. angry. impatient. you stop for a pedestrian to
cross. you can feel them boiling over. savor it for a
moment.... but, you can't cross the line and start being
passive aggressive. it has to be a natural thing, like when
i saw the wind blowing a flower in rapid, beautiful six-foot
circle as it got caught in a vortex between two buildings.
both of these moments happened today


 

offline Tony Danza from Hillary 2020 on 2019-06-26 01:52 [#02581236]
Points: 1737 Status: Addict



Owl Socket's first and only album I Need More Owl Socket In
My Life was absolutely savaged by critics, with the title
giving them all the ammunition they needed.


 

offline Tony Danza from Hillary 2020 on 2019-06-26 01:56 [#02581237]
Points: 1737 Status: Addict



whoa what the hell

so did you nail the headmaster's wife or what

"I've come to apologize..." [wacka wacka music starts] "for
not giving you the attention you deserve"


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2019-06-26 02:06 [#02581238]
Points: 12852 Status: Regular | Followup to Tony Danza: #02581237



no, but -- 100% true -- he was kind of sweaty and out of
breath when i knocked on his door. immediately, i thought:
this is either the perfect moment or the worst moment. it
wound up being the former, thankfully. he seemed a bit
startled to have this happen right then and accepted my
apology promptly; i always figure if it'd been over
breakfast it would have been much longer and torturous.

and -- like i said, she was an obnoxious sow. fat. in
retrospect, this was her personal vacation to france, it was
being ruined by the fact that she had to babysit kids, and
she just wants to enjoy france, ok?

if she'd been flown out there just as the headmaster's wife,
along with another teacher that actually knew us (to do the
job she clearly did not want to do) then everything would
have been peachy.


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-26 15:41 [#02581276]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



at some point today the bus drivah had to quit the
conditioning cos it was shouting hot air only. poor me and
the desperades on the bus. what a fucking roast. and
tomorrow and friday will be worse, a friend told me with a
strange suicide aura.


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-26 15:46 [#02581277]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



maya is steadfast on her bed and doesnt want to move


 

online Roger Wilco from nude idol on 2019-06-26 15:51 [#02581278]
Points: 639 Status: Addict



Wang: the essence of chill


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2019-06-27 11:41 [#02581289]
Points: 5265 Status: Regular | Followup to mohamed: #02581276 | Show recordbag



while we were sweating buckets yesterday evening we wondered
what it would be like to be in italy of spain now and how
you folks deal with the heat right now.



 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-27 12:07 [#02581290]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



I told maya to resist when i got out this mornig


 

offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2019-06-27 12:11 [#02581291]
Points: 5265 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



i see what you mean with pissing off people by pointing out
their misbehaviour. the risk of it backfiring is immense.
being a good role model is the best way, but in many
occasions i doubt people see what they have been doing wrong
all their lives if not being told. really frustrating.
heres a perfect example of people clearly knowing what they
do but just dont quit, ideal for pissing off instead of
encouraging to do better:
i parked my car, noticing a parking woman who was parking
while running the motor and being on the phone (speakers
btw). i went upstairs, loaded the car with moving boxes of
stuff and was good to go. she was still there speaking on
the phone motor running. so i tried to signal her to cut the
engine by doing a twisting hand motion. she then lowered the
automatic window and said hello similing all the way and my
anger was all gone, so i was able to greet her in a friendly
manner and ask her if the motor was still running to which
she replied "yes, but im about to take off" and i said she
was standing here for at least 5 minutes already and that
she could turn it off easily wihtout cutting off the phone
etc. like giving a super kind advice and left.
so essentially i made a sexist soccer mum situation :(

i trust my judgement but its not failsafe in any way.
i do believe in writing letters to the city/council however,
pointing out how many green areas that dont have any leisure
usage would be way more beautiful if not trimmed to death
but being left alone to grow wild flowers. etc. noise
pollution blah blah.
in some areas they plant flowers like that by now. people
seem to like the idea since magazines told them to.



 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-27 15:44 [#02581297]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



greets from the 36 degrees chamber


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-27 15:45 [#02581298]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



sorry 38


 

offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2019-06-27 16:28 [#02581299]
Points: 4567 Status: Addict



i've only experienced 40+ degree weather once, in france
when i was 18 on a cheapo holiday with friends. felt like i
was dying until beer o'clock and a little boozy kip in the
hotel room. in retrospect this might've been early-onset
withdrawal symptoms, i caned it on the drink around that
time after a bad breakup... anyway i have no idea how to
survive the hot weather without getting tipsy, summer is my
"trigger" to put it in (lame) alkyspeak


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-27 17:46 [#02581300]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



window closed the only salvation, otherwise its hell's
kitchen


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-27 20:28 [#02581303]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



everybody has melted


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-27 20:33 [#02581304]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



been told tomorrow there will be 4 degrees less than today,
heres a hope to restore the normality here on xlt


 

offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2019-06-27 20:34 [#02581305]
Points: 4567 Status: Addict



*drips all over the thread*


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-27 20:36 [#02581306]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



thanks for for 2 things:

1. not much fat to carry around
2. i have a peach and a banana in the fridge


 

offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2019-06-27 20:45 [#02581307]
Points: 4567 Status: Addict



i've ballooned 30kg since i've been in hospital, was stick
thin when i came in though. sweaty manboob alert


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-27 20:45 [#02581308]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



will RussleDust survive the heat? that is the true question
imho


 

offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2019-06-27 20:47 [#02581309]
Points: 4567 Status: Addict | Followup to mohamed: #02581308



he better, i'll kick his arse in the afterlife if he checks
out early


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-27 20:48 [#02581310]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Followup to belb: #02581307 | Show recordbag



haha same happened to me when i got in the soft rehab place,
free to eat what i wanted... was talking about it with a guy
at work today, was living with the ol Peppe (65 yo) at the
time and i used to cook half a kg of pasta for two at
midnight. heaviest i weighted was 76


 

offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2019-06-27 20:49 [#02581311]
Points: 4567 Status: Addict | Followup to mohamed: #02581310



86kg here, i've cut back to one meal a day


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-27 20:54 [#02581312]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



reminding the days i was writing how good eating was on here
xD


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-27 20:58 [#02581313]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



im the dan akroyd at the christmas eve party in trading
places, everywhere i go. friends get scared and lock their
pantries when i arrive


 

offline mohamed on 2019-06-27 21:29 [#02581315]
Points: 28610 Status: Addict | Show recordbag



who has the courage to spam anything today


 


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