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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2019-05-09 09:27 [#02577063]
Points: 21419 Status: Regular
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This pizza box says "MADE WITH 100% Real MOZZARELLA CHEESE":
LAZY_TITLE The claim they're willing to put in writing right on every box to stand out from the "competition" is that.. it's real. How is it not going to be real? 100% real. There's no imaginary numbers used, not an iota of anything but realness, not 99.9999% real, but 100.000%, whereas I give myself about 10% on the realness scale. I notice they use all caps on some words, like they do in the legal system to people's names, so maybe it's a scam that doesn't technically claim anything since words with all caps aren't technically real words. Is there something that qualifies as non real cheese? I know imaginary cheese, which leads me to wonder, can I sell pizzas with nothing inside the box as long as I make no realness claims? Or do other pizzas use toe jam or something if they don't make realness claims? Can anything be substituted for cheese to make it non-real? If I have a pizza with no cheese and park a car on top is the car non-real cheese? There's not even a millionth of a percent of anything but real cheese, no contaminants of any kind, or maybe real cheese is defined as the cheese plus its contaminants. It's a bold claim, I think they're simply confident nobody can disprove it. Or even if they do the person who claims to prove or disprove it might be unreal theirself. It's a pretty cool topic, thanks.
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2019-05-09 09:49 [#02577065]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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He he
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Indeksical
from Phobiazero Damage Control (United Kingdom) on 2019-05-09 09:57 [#02577066]
Points: 10671 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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Americans love their whey and emulsifiers so when something is actual cheese they put a warning on the box so you can't sue them.
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RussellDust
on 2019-05-09 10:17 [#02577069]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker | Followup to Indeksical: #02577066
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Ha ha!
Always been astounded with their cheese sprays.
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Indeksical
from Phobiazero Damage Control (United Kingdom) on 2019-05-09 10:20 [#02577070]
Points: 10671 Status: Regular | Followup to RussellDust: #02577069 | Show recordbag
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Prime example of science going too far.
designer babies < creating black holes < spray cheese
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RussellDust
on 2019-05-09 10:21 [#02577071]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker | Followup to Indeksical: #02577070
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:D
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wavephace
from off the chain on 2019-05-09 13:24 [#02577093]
Points: 3098 Status: Lurker
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Imagine thinking "cows were raped for this... we guarantee it" is a good marketing slogan
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Indeksical
from Phobiazero Damage Control (United Kingdom) on 2019-05-09 13:25 [#02577094]
Points: 10671 Status: Regular | Followup to wavephace: #02577093 | Show recordbag
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Milking a person is molestation at best imo.
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wavephace
from off the chain on 2019-05-09 13:38 [#02577097]
Points: 3098 Status: Lurker | Followup to Indeksical: #02577094
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Breastfeeding is exploitation of folks too but at least they can theoretically consent
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wavephace
from off the chain on 2019-05-09 13:55 [#02577098]
Points: 3098 Status: Lurker | Followup to wavephace: #02577093
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Just to be clear, I'm using cows in the colloquial, gender-neutral sense. I understand that some bulls can also be raped to produce dairy products
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Cliff Glitchard
from DEEP DOWN INSIDE on 2019-05-10 00:19 [#02577161]
Points: 4158 Status: Lurker
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What sort of cunt makes a pizza box out of cheese, 100% real or not?
Not even Papa John would do that and he makes pizzas boxes out of ashes of dead black children.
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2019-05-10 03:09 [#02577163]
Points: 21419 Status: Regular
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They probably had a committee meeting. Is it organic? Can we put that on the box? Or non gmo? No sir. Well, I mean, the cheese is made with cow milk right? We can say like from cows with no growth hormone or whatever the trendy thing is?
Well, we actually lowered our costs by using horse milk. Horse cheese. Well... hmm... is the milk free from horse feces or urin at least?
Our tests were inconclusive, we probably shouldn't mention it.
Ok... let's see, let's see... the pizza at least exists in reality right? It's real. Yeah, play up that angle. Really emphasize 'real', put that word in a nice cursive font, you know. Our pizza is real. The tomatoes are real the cheese is real. All right meeting adjourned.
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dariusgriffin
from cool on 2019-05-10 03:19 [#02577165]
Points: 12390 Status: Regular
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maybe they mean it is real traditional mozzarella made with buffalo's milk okay
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dariusgriffin
from cool on 2019-05-10 03:24 [#02577166]
Points: 12390 Status: Regular
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wait wmw buddy, are you a freeman-on-the-land? that would be awesome i love those idiots
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2019-05-10 03:39 [#02577167]
Points: 21419 Status: Regular
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I don't own a single grain of dirt. You can't buy land by the grain, only by the amount intentionally measured to be unaffordable for the renter caste in a rigged rentocracy. It's ok, all colleges are full of brainwashed communists, you're in the majority of people who think freedom is bad.
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wavephace
from off the chain on 2019-05-10 04:00 [#02577169]
Points: 3098 Status: Lurker
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Nor have we dedicated enough resources to scholarship on the PIZZERIA 𝓢𝓽𝔂𝓵𝓮 CRUST
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wavephace
from off the chain on 2019-05-10 04:03 [#02577170]
Points: 3098 Status: Lurker
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What are the sociocultural implications of declaring one type of pizza "supreme"
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2019-05-10 05:04 [#02577173]
Points: 21419 Status: Regular
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The purposely made a word propagandized to be "bad" called "the F word" so they can start banning actual letters of the alphabet. "The F word" now, "the F letter" later. Only 25 more letters to go, wait "the N word", so 24. Once we have no framework to think in, we can legally be farmed and made into pizza toppings, just like other animals that can't talk.
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2019-05-10 05:08 [#02577174]
Points: 21419 Status: Regular
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I want this to become a meme: instead of saying "word to your mother" like vanilla ice, say "N word to your mother".
N word to your mother, w M w
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mermaidman
on 2019-05-10 10:15 [#02577180]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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100% real boobiez
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mermaidman
on 2019-05-10 10:17 [#02577181]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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today even bums are fake bruh how are u supposed to trust someone with a fake bum
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2019-05-10 22:26 [#02577221]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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i dont think the problem is true or not true, it depends if its done well or not
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Zephyr Twin
from ΔΔΔ on 2019-05-10 23:35 [#02577225]
Points: 16982 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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...MILFs, in your area, ready to fuck. Sign up now!
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