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tune albatrossi
 

online EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2019-04-06 08:24 [#02573535]
Points: 11082 Status: Addict



have you ever had that track you were just never able to
finish, and it absolutely bugs the shit out of you?

LAZY_TITLE

i remember trying to finish this a million times, and it was
always wrong. i was going through a rough stage in life and
it was like a little synecdoche of what i was feeling,
almost.

it's hard not to turn it into a long story... i was dealing
with crippling bouts of depression in college, i more or
less stopped trying, my parents were simultaneously
understanding and impossible. they did not blame me for
having these problems, but they did want to take me to the
doctor shop like i was a car; have my spark plugs changed.
it doesn't work that way. i think they sort of knew this,
but there was denial -- oh, no, it'll smooth out. it would
not. not until i took it into my own hands a couple years
later, anyways

anyways, i'm taking a semester off, moody, and i get to
writing this. i see visualizations of a toy laser blaster,
sort of schematic form, that i had when i was five. there's
a period at the end where it actually starts to clear up; i
see a field full of giant sunflowers gently bobbing to the
wind. after that, though, it's just me bouncing down the
audio and mashing it into an outro because i rewrote the
part after that part at least twenty times and it was
always, just, i dunno... not only not right, but
soul-crushingly wrong. i'm terrified to even open the
project again


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2019-04-06 09:07 [#02573537]
Points: 21041 Status: Regular



Lately I pretty much never make anything complicated enough
to need much finishing. If I don't imagine it right away,
might as well imagine the next thing instead (though
sometimes, a lot actually, I relisten to stuff and
continue/add stuff, but still not overly complicated when
just using modplug tones, useful listening with fresh ears
anyway).
Maybe the 1:26 twinkle could've taken the listener to the
hyper twinkle universe full of 90-100% twinkly
twinkle melodies. The end outro did seem kinda awkward.
Aphex has a lot of skill to suddenly switch to something
unique while still sounding good, like a lot of the come 2
daddy album. I guess the obvious thing is the end part could
continue as normal but 'break down' and erase like half or
so of the constituent patterns leaving a more minimal
overall pattern for the end loop(s). Good song overall.


 

online EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2019-04-06 09:18 [#02573541]
Points: 11082 Status: Addict



i suppose there are different sets of issues at play, here.

the first, and most recurring one: as you start a track, it
is full of potential. as you make it real, you have to make
compromises. carl jung had some comment w/rt his "red book"
-- you must draw these dream images out. it will seem crude,
clumsy, but you must get them out somehow...

so, pretty much, when it's an abstract idea, it's this
perfect, pretty thing. making it reality gets into ugliness.
when it comes to art, this is procrastination's biggest ally
-- that you have this wonderful idea, that you want to get
it right.... and that's why you never finish it... because
you can't get it to be as pretty as it is in your head...

the second is psychological hangups


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2019-04-06 09:42 [#02573545]
Points: 21041 Status: Regular



I reckon I'll be able to automate the 'make it into reality'
to a large degree to remove the drudgery and just press a
button to see what a new randomishly generated pattern
sounds like with another pattern(s), keep, reject, or mutate
etc. you can start from the same initial conditions and
mutate in many twisted ways effortlessly, programming gives
insane leverage, if you can not suck enough to logically
code it which is yet to be seen for me.


 

online belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2019-04-06 09:46 [#02573547]
Points: 3694 Status: Regular



i really like this, and the end part doesn't sound too
jarring to me... it's hard to pull off seamless time
signature / tempo changes. i studied the .wav file of push
button objects - non existant (gescom mix) to get my head
around doing it and that track still blows my mind. if i'm
thinking along the same lines it could kinda fall into 6/8
to blend the 2 sections. like i say though, i do like it as
is

also (possibly unrelated) here's another track about
giant sunflowers


 

online EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2019-04-06 10:01 [#02573551]
Points: 11082 Status: Addict | Followup to belb: #02573547



there was always meant to be more to the tune; it wasn't
supposed to end there. i generated like twenty alternate
versions of the project with other harmonies i hated;
wandered off to deal with life for a bit. then i was back at
college, somewhat more functional, and i decided: heck, this
is a gulag. i'll just bounce down the end of the last part
of what i'm happy with and mix that off into and ending, and
here we are.

it just bothers me that solar tendrils was deep, personal,
really humming, then i just hit a wall, now i doubt it'll
ever get any further. probably for the best i lazed out and
jammed in that dub ending so i could tack it onto an album
whilst i still had the delusion of a musical career

as i was majoring in computer science. money off music, when
i'd been programming since long before i wrote music?
lunacy

(still is)


 


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