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do you ever
 

offline mermaidman on 2019-02-24 13:16 [#02570064]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular



flush before you finish pooping so you don't clog the
toilet? i forgot to yesterday, almost clogged it had to
flush a couple of times


 

offline mermaidman on 2019-02-24 13:17 [#02570065]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular



needless to say there was a lot of pooping going on


 

offline Tony Danza from NAFO Suicide Hotline on 2019-02-24 13:34 [#02570066]
Points: 3638 Status: Lurker



sometimes I manage to extrude a real cinderblock and panic
ensues. sort of like this classic David Sedaris
story


 

offline mermaidman on 2019-02-24 14:25 [#02570068]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to Tony Danza: #02570066



yeah i have those. one time i thought i was gonna rip my
anus then remembered all the anal videos i watched. hurt a
lot though


 

offline Indeksical from Phobiazero Damage Control (United Kingdom) on 2019-02-24 15:44 [#02570070]
Points: 10671 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



Don't you hate it when you do a massive poo and turn round
to have a look and it's gone? Like it's slipped right round
the u bend. Your moment of pride robbed.


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2019-02-24 16:11 [#02570072]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker | Followup to Indeksical: #02570070



do you hate when you just gone for a shit and the door bell
rings, or having a piss and you just started and the phone
rings


 

offline Indeksical from Phobiazero Damage Control (United Kingdom) on 2019-02-24 16:25 [#02570073]
Points: 10671 Status: Regular | Followup to Hyperflake: #02570072 | Show recordbag



Makes my blood run cold


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2019-02-24 16:36 [#02570074]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker | Followup to Indeksical: #02570073



yes, its sods law as well, always happens you could be
waiting in all day for a parcel and as soon as you have a
turd hanging half way out your arse their is a knock on the
door
quantum turd theory



 

offline mermaidman on 2019-02-24 18:05 [#02570080]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to Indeksical: #02570070



yes happens a lot too. feels like i didn't take a poo yet.
like when you eat too fast and you still feel hungry


 

offline Tony Danza from NAFO Suicide Hotline on 2019-02-24 22:29 [#02570089]
Points: 3638 Status: Lurker



of course the only proper way to poop is on company time

Lavatory and Liberty: The Secret History of the Bathroom
Break


 

offline marlowe from Antarctica on 2019-02-24 22:33 [#02570090]
Points: 24578 Status: Lurker



The Xltronic Metaphor: A Thread


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2019-02-25 19:57 [#02570104]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker



I hate when the end of your knob touches the cold porcelain


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2019-02-25 19:57 [#02570105]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker



that's what that moby song was about


 

offline mermaidman on 2019-02-25 20:01 [#02570106]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to Hyperflake: #02570104



me too. then there is also the water splash to the anus that
seems to be haunting almost everyone


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2019-02-25 20:03 [#02570107]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker | Followup to mermaidman: #02570106



yeah that's the worst especially after a shower or fresh
pair of underwear, a turd launched splashwave over your
bollocks


 

offline mohamed from the turtle business on 2019-02-25 20:23 [#02570108]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Followup to mermaidman: #02570106 | Show recordbag



you mean the splash with your face


 

offline mermaidman on 2019-02-25 20:37 [#02570109]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular



no i mean when you're mohamed and your pussy lips dip in the
water


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2019-02-25 20:52 [#02570110]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker



LAZY_TITLE


 

offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2019-02-25 21:44 [#02570113]
Points: 6384 Status: Lurker



i can't read a turd thread on xlt without pondering
hyakusen's bronze souvenir

dellicate poop her in chin


 

offline mermaidman on 2019-02-25 21:59 [#02570114]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to mermaidman: #02570106



witch


 

offline mermaidman on 2019-02-25 22:00 [#02570115]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to belb: #02570113



delicate poop? her in chin?!


 

offline mermaidman on 2019-02-25 22:02 [#02570116]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular



eat high-fiber food and your poop shall be delicate


 

offline mohamed from the turtle business on 2019-02-26 04:44 [#02570123]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



you mean the pussy of that sow of your mother which has
crusts on the ass


 

offline mermaidman on 2019-02-26 08:12 [#02570126]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular



your mom


 

offline RussellDust on 2019-02-27 13:16 [#02570168]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker



They have great loos here so it doesn’t happen, no.
It happens abroad sometimes, for example toilets in Greece
are made for tiny people. Old English lavatories can be
problematic.

I had the “perfect poo” the other day so have to mention
that. Didn’t have to push: it just slid out giving me a
warm fuzzy sensation throughout the body. It didn’t hide
so I can admire the perfect texture, colour and shape. The
cherry on the cake was that after looking at the damage upon
first wipe there was absolutely nothing on the tp.

Apparently, and I can’t wrap my head around this, some
people don’t check the tp when they wipe themselves. They
seem to find the idea of checking to be dubious. Skidmark
City or what?



 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2019-02-27 13:29 [#02570169]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker | Followup to RussellDust: #02570168



barbarians, what sort of person doesn't check if their arse
isn't covered in shite


 

offline mermaidman on 2019-02-27 13:38 [#02570170]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular



i check


 

offline Tony Danza from NAFO Suicide Hotline on 2019-02-27 13:55 [#02570172]
Points: 3638 Status: Lurker



good boys who check shall receive an I Checked sticker


 

offline RussellDust on 2019-02-27 14:09 [#02570173]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker



Ha ha!


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2019-02-27 14:50 [#02570181]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker



I always make sure I have a clean arse before stepping out
the front door, don't want to be run over then they have to
tell my mum in my autopsy that I had shit stains all over my
undies


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2019-02-27 14:51 [#02570182]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker



also want to avoid the Tesco bum sniffer, you don't know if
he will ever come out of retirement


 


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