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mermaidman
on 2017-10-15 10:52 [#02534083]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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hope someone else doesn't find them!
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-10-15 11:34 [#02534085]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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Anal beads are a sex toy consisting of multiple spheres or balls attached together in series which are continuously inserted through the anus into the rectum and then removed with varying speeds depending on the effect desired (most typically at orgasm to enhance climax). Those who use anal beads enjoy the pleasurable feeling they receive as the ball passes through the narrow sphincter of the anus.
(wikipedia)
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-15 11:48 [#02534086]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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yeah a friend gave them to me after he bought new ones
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-10-15 12:02 [#02534087]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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fo' real?
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-15 12:22 [#02534088]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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lol no just kidding
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-15 12:23 [#02534089]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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these beads he bought them from a vintage store. they are vintage wooden beads
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-10-15 12:30 [#02534090]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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its the pleasure you find while taking a shit?
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-15 12:54 [#02534091]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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eww
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-10-15 16:09 [#02534098]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker
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LAZY_TITLE
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-15 16:10 [#02534101]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to Hyperflake: #02534098
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i'm afraid to click on that link hyperflake even though it is a youtube link but of course i'll click anyway
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-15 18:37 [#02534117]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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my beads are poop-free
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SignedUpToLOL
from Zuckuss fanfiction (United Kingdom) on 2017-10-15 18:58 [#02534119]
Points: 2853 Status: Regular
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I wondered what the cat kept going after, they're under my sofa.
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-15 19:12 [#02534121]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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bad kitty! don't chew on it!
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RussellDust
on 2017-10-15 20:08 [#02534124]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker
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They’ve been up there all along, that’s my guess. Have a good rummage through just to be sure; who knows, you might find other stuff you lost ages ago!
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-15 20:31 [#02534129]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to RussellDust: #02534124
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yeah that's the first place i looked. where do the beads go? in my ass so that's where i checked first but no they are not there. thanks for the help though russell!
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fleetmouse
from Horny for Truth on 2017-10-16 00:21 [#02534134]
Points: 18042 Status: Lurker
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[criss angel pulls the beads from his ass hole] are these your beads sir
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belb
from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2017-10-16 09:57 [#02534136]
Points: 6384 Status: Lurker | Followup to fleetmouse: #02534134
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hey there sir peepleton, how the devil are you?
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-16 09:59 [#02534137]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to fleetmouse: #02534134
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hahaha i think it’s time i buy new beads you can keep them chris thank you
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fleetmouse
from Horny for Truth on 2017-10-16 13:07 [#02534138]
Points: 18042 Status: Lurker | Followup to belb: #02534136
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good good I missed you guy's
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fleetmouse
from Horny for Truth on 2017-10-16 13:09 [#02534139]
Points: 18042 Status: Lurker | Followup to mermaidman: #02534137
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[criss angel looking like he's trying not to look offended]
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-16 15:23 [#02534142]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to fleetmouse: #02534139
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...bye criss! *waves awkwardly and flees away* i wouldn't want to upset criss angel you never know what he can do.
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RussellDust
on 2017-10-16 15:35 [#02534143]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker
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Aw, peeps, ace to see you!
Trust you to turn up again in this thread!
Btw, I think I found your beads, merman. They were in my dog’s poo today. Weird. Life.
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-16 15:42 [#02534144]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to RussellDust: #02534143
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oh! poor dog had to shit those beads out. i think we gotta leave these beads alone man. there is something going on with these beads i’m willing to buy new beads from my local sex shop.
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-16 15:59 [#02534145]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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if you buy a horse size dildo they give you the anal beads for free. but the thing is now your anus is too wide for the regular beads they give you.
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-10-16 16:30 [#02534146]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker
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A few bowling balls tied together on a anchor chain makes a suitable set of anal beads for a humpback whale
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-16 17:05 [#02534149]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to Hyperflake: #02534146
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i think a whale might have a wider anus than that. what if whales enjoy anal beads immensely? what if they moan so hard whole cities collapse?
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-10-16 17:16 [#02534152]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker | Followup to mermaidman: #02534149
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I think they have relatively small arseholes in relation to their body mass, its why their balls are only the size of basketballs but if everything was scaled they should be the size of a smart car
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-16 17:33 [#02534154]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to Hyperflake: #02534152
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wow i wonder how long it takes them to take a shit with a tiny asshole like that. if their dicks are as tiny as their balls it’s not so cool to be a whale i guess. now if you were the size of a basketball and had a dick the size of a whale you would be very popular among women.
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-10-16 17:55 [#02534156]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker
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If you had a dick the size of whale, you could be going to the shops and your dick would be around the next corner in a different postcode.
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-16 18:01 [#02534158]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to Hyperflake: #02534156
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lol! your dick would be around the corner picking chicks
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-16 18:08 [#02534159]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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your dick would cause so much trouble
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-10-16 18:09 [#02534160]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker
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it would have to be on those roller logs they use to move those statues on easter island, otherwise you would get horrible friction burns on your bell end, also you could get oaps on zimmer frames and naughty children stuck under your foreskin, so you would need a pair of wing mirrors on your bollocks
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-10-16 18:10 [#02534161]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker
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if you got an erection you would demolish houses
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-10-16 18:12 [#02534163]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker
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yolou could use it as a pontoon bridge during periods of flooding, a giant draft excluder for the homeless and elderly,
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-16 18:21 [#02534164]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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the sound the friction would make would be huuuge! kushhhhh! everyone would know you and your dick are on the move. but i like the idea of using your dick for a good cause.
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-10-16 18:43 [#02534170]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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hi fleetmouse!
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-10-16 19:41 [#02534179]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker | Followup to mermaidman: #02534164
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imagine a giant starfish 50 foot across but all its legs were large penises
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-10-16 19:42 [#02534180]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker
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then the backstreet boys all dance onto the scene and pull down their trousers at the apex of each cock leg
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-16 23:55 [#02534219]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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hyperflake i'm all about imagining a giant starfish with giant dicks for legs but please no backstreet boy dancing that's gayer than gay i would rather perform fellatio than that
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-10-17 14:27 [#02534241]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker | Followup to mermaidman: #02534219
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ok Nsync then
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-17 17:26 [#02534246]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to Hyperflake: #02534241
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yeah you're right. in a thread about anal beads boy bands deserve a mention of course what was i thinking nsync backstreet boys all that
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-17 17:34 [#02534247]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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how is signeduptolol not all over this thread i don't understand one of the most famous forerunners of gayism
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-17 17:38 [#02534249]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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he is such a definitive gay that gayness earned certain distinctive qualities thank to his being
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-17 17:39 [#02534250]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular
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:P
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2017-10-17 17:40 [#02534251]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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i expected to see him in this thread, too. i hope he's alright
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-10-17 17:59 [#02534254]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker
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He is too busy autobumming himself in a torus like configuration
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-crazone
from smashing acid over and over on 2017-10-17 18:13 [#02534257]
Points: 11228 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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Flushed down the toilet?
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-17 18:31 [#02534260]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to -crazone: #02534257
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my beads floarted on water i used them in hot tubs frequently. they were too wide to flush down anyway.
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fleetmouse
from Horny for Truth on 2017-10-17 18:38 [#02534261]
Points: 18042 Status: Lurker
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[90s dude walks by wearing your wooden anal beads around his neck, and a kangol hat]
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mermaidman
on 2017-10-17 18:51 [#02534263]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to fleetmouse: #02534261
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there are many imitations of my anal beads. they claim it's my "used" anal beads and sell them on ebay. don't fall for it people.
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