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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2017-03-19 12:02 [#02515870]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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just before last christmas, i got an email from my mom. it more or less read, "you're welcome to come over for christmas. oh, yeah, and your father has parkinson's disease."
when he was diagnosed with cancer two or so years ago, she more or less did the exact same shit, even though my father told her not to tell me. i'm sure he told her not to tell me this time, too.
depending on her mood, my mom will either love me or hate me. look up "borderline personality disorder" on wikipeda, study the character of livia soproano, and you more or less have the idea. she is a manipulative nutter completely held hostage by her own paranoia and emotion. my dad is alright, but useless.
the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, i have to admit. the only bit of luck is that, having been able to watch it happen to someone else (gradually destroying relationships, denying it, destroying more) i've been on the lookout for that death spiral, and avoided it as best i can.
once i saw what was going on, i really tried to help my mom out. tried to talk. it was a disaster. she almost killed me. literally punched me, throwing shit at me. that was it. i was done. i ran. i got the fuck out of there.
from time to time, they reach out and lob grenades. mom's christmas present was "dad has parkinson's." oh, you shouldn't have
now i get am email from dad: the dog died. mom's had a heart attack. we're being sued and we have to sell the house. you should come get your stuff out of the basement.
they live three hours away. i don't have the gas money to get there. the car needs new brakes. i'm about to owe thousands in taxes; i have $3 in my paypal account. i am genuinely scared.
you guys know me better than my own family does, at this point. this board has been a happy place for me. i'm going to be a mess over the next few weeks, and i don't want to risk taking it out on anyone here. love you all. see you when things get better.
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fleetmouse
from Horny for Truth on 2017-03-19 14:03 [#02515871]
Points: 18042 Status: Lurker
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don't know if you'll be back to read this before your hiatus but best wishes, hope better days are ahead
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-03-19 14:28 [#02515872]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker
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All the best mate, I really hope you get to the other side of this, dont like to hear anyone suffering unnecessarily
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belb
from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2017-03-19 15:41 [#02515875]
Points: 6384 Status: Lurker
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sounds terrible, here's hoping you have better luck soon my man
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-03-19 18:10 [#02515877]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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love ur mum, good luck!
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umbroman3
from United Kingdom on 2017-03-19 18:13 [#02515878]
Points: 6123 Status: Lurker
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all the best to you
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2017-03-19 21:06 [#02515879]
Points: 21419 Status: Regular
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I suspect selling a house takes a long ass time, maybe a year, so you maybe have time to scrounge up funds, or you could politely tell them you have no funds to drive there if it's a fact, or it could maybe be shipped to you, or maybe a note could be left for whoever buys it to please store that stuff in the basement until it can be picked up. Some argue that tax is theft and thus getting turbo tax and fudging the numbers until zero is owed is merely self defense from being stolen from, since indeed zero is often available to be paid, I mean it's like a mafia shakedown of someone with no funds. One might tell all the CEOs and the 20 people that supposedly have half the world's wealth to put your "taxes" on their bill. I mean, in theory, I'm not advocating anything. Oh, but of course turbo tax... costs money too. Buying it is basically part of the tax, another fee to a large corporation, or maybe just the single cartel if that's what it is. Sorry; good luck.
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SignedUpToLOL
from Zuckuss fanfiction (United Kingdom) on 2017-03-20 18:42 [#02515880]
Points: 2853 Status: Regular
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lol
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-03-20 18:50 [#02515881]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Followup to SignedUpToLOL: #02515880 | Show recordbag
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i bet you're lolling at the 'you know me better than anyone else' stuff
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RussellDust
on 2017-03-20 19:29 [#02515882]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker
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I hate to be the one, but life is at times, and I'm sure for most, excruciatingly tough. We're a fucking emotional species, which doesn't help.
For example I could type:
My parents split up when I was 3, no stability throughout my childhood, dad's had 4 heart attacks, as a teen I lived on the street for a period, I went through a slow 3 year suicide attempt recently (severe depression, addiction, self hatred) my mum is more up and down than a yoyo, I have a very difficult illness to deal with, blah fucking blah.
I've also lived amazing times, and have always preferred the optimistic approach.
You're a smart, interesting bloke, EMT. Use your logic to overcome this shit time, and rise. Use your brain, be good to yourself. Good to others.
I'm sure your point here isn't for us all to feel sorry for you. At least I hope so. You can't really measure suffering. If a person suffers, it suffers, even if another sufferer on the planet wouldn't condone their suffering. It's relative, and the really issue is: can you deal with it, rise, and possibly learn from it on the way.
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RussellDust
on 2017-03-20 19:30 [#02515883]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker
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It's all about the really issue.
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AMPI MAX
from United Kingdom on 2017-03-20 19:48 [#02515884]
Points: 10789 Status: Regular
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guys i gotta tell you. im actually currently fat where as epic was only fat before.
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-03-20 20:03 [#02515885]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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my parents also split up when i was three. prove yourself before them while they're alive
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-03-20 20:05 [#02515886]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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im not sure to tell you you have to crash your head on the wall like everyone and come out of shit with the sembiances of a person
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-03-20 20:13 [#02515887]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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health is the biggest issue, both for you and your relatives. do as you can, dont fall into emotional traps, you can feel you're not being respected sometimes but passing over it makes you stronger, never feel enslaved. give what you can, don't overlook you're being given as well, dont take it for granted. people might be closer to death than you are
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-03-20 20:17 [#02515888]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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i mean people might be looking at death from a closer perspective than yours
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-03-20 20:24 [#02515889]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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age means actually nothing, as you can find old bastards trying to shit you in their mind business anytime. but im not sure its the case of your family.
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-03-20 20:27 [#02515890]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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also if you rely on that bullshit thread in the means that people knows you as a person for some stupid bullshit text you chose to type, you're actually fucked up, to put it the american way
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-03-20 20:45 [#02515891]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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dig deeper with them, dont come here and bullshit us like we know you better than them.
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AMPI MAX
from United Kingdom on 2017-03-20 20:47 [#02515892]
Points: 10789 Status: Regular
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eat lots and relax i dont care if im fat honestly. things arent so bad. all of you try to cheer up
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-03-20 20:52 [#02515893]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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you see, ampi is fat, hes having fun with food, lucky him, you rob eggs from your flatmates, i do like ampi two days a week, i eat a lot of dates and make liquid shit
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-03-20 21:01 [#02515894]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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seriously now if you're actually looking for help out there never try to fool anyone into any fucking joke, be dead serious
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freqy
on 2017-03-21 11:57 [#02515901]
Points: 18724 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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Best wishes Epics.!
Hope your parents get well soon; and you find some peace and calm.
freqy x.
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-03-21 22:21 [#02515969]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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listen to big calm by morcheeba or some buddha bar
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2017-06-20 04:03 [#02522867]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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here is the speech i gave at my dad's memorial. it is pretty much an xltronic post, but i don't think anyone noticed.
other news: mom and i have a therapist to act as a traffic cop. in our session today, i told a story: i was driving my two best buddies slash roomies absolutely crazy because i could. not. shut. up.
so, i came up with a keyword: peter molyneux. i told them: "should i be driving you crazy -- changing topics every thirty seconds (it's because of astrocytes) -- just say molyneux and i will stop talking."
it didn't work at first. i actually floated the idea of having them stand there with foam bats and bop me when i molyneux'd until it sank in... but, no, eventually it sank in without us having to resort to that.
before i told this story, though, i told the dr. therapist this: "yes, on way over here, while my mom was driving, she was driving me crazy because she was changing topics every thirty seconds."
dr. therapist listened patiently, then essentially said, "yes, that sounds good. let's do that again."
now i can tell my mom "molyneux" when she's changing topics every thirty seconds. this is somewhere between validating and mad cool, but mostly, it's a relief.
she is not having an easy time with it, but neither did i.
i've missed you guys.
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RussellDust
on 2017-06-20 12:06 [#02522872]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker
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That's a nice speech. My condolences.
I need to find a 'molyneux' word, it's a good idea.
Welcome back, EMT!
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-06-20 16:49 [#02522873]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02522867 | Show recordbag
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Condolences
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-06-20 20:15 [#02522877]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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im not touching donut cakes from months, if that comforts you
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-06-21 14:52 [#02522902]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02522867
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RIP your dad, sorry to hear it, is your name Geoff then?
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-06-21 14:56 [#02522903]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker
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Your dad sounded like a good man, i like people who have a natural curiosity about how stuff works, its what makes life worth living isnt it
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SignedUpToLOL
from Zuckuss fanfiction (United Kingdom) on 2017-06-21 15:10 [#02522905]
Points: 2853 Status: Regular
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Genuine XLT bro-hug. Come to London and I promise to only bum you a little bit.
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SignedUpToLOL
from Zuckuss fanfiction (United Kingdom) on 2017-06-21 15:11 [#02522906]
Points: 2853 Status: Regular
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That is if you don't get run over by Bad Men Doing Terror, first.
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-06-22 21:36 [#02522986]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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i have mastered the art of cooking rice, doses, in case the cooking process escapes the methodic way i try to do that, resulting in diarrhea totally halted, making nice and friendly turds to manipulate and im sure something healthy and nice to eat. i settled with 150 grams of rice and half a tin of meat.
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-06-22 21:37 [#02522987]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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talking about my dog in case you forgot
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-06-22 21:48 [#02522988]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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i give her a small bit of burger sometimes
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2017-06-23 23:27 [#02523047]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular | Followup to Hyperflake: #02522902
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RIP your dad, sorry to hear it, is your name Geoff then?
i was named after Chaucer
Your dad sounded like a good man, i like people who have a natural curiosity about how stuff works, its what makes life worth living isnt it
he gave me my first soldering lessons before i was in kindergarten, but i can't recall playing baseball with him even once.
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2017-06-23 23:29 [#02523048]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular | Followup to mohamed: #02522987
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i have mastered the art of cooking rice, doses, in case the
cooking process escapes the methodic way i try to do that, resulting in diarrhea totally halted, making nice and friendly turds to manipulate and im sure something healthy and nice to eat. i settled with 150 grams of rice and half a
tin of meat.
talking about my dog in case you forgot
of course not! now, obviously, i have to continue the theme, and ask -- how much do the turds weigh? and is it more or less than the weight of the empty tin?
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-06-23 23:30 [#02523049]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02523047
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ah chaucer the only bit i know is the monks coming out of the devils arse, i probably should know more
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EpicMegatrax
from Greatest Hits on 2017-06-23 23:31 [#02523050]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular
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Genuine XLT bro-hug. Come to London and I promise to only
bum you a little bit.
That is if you don't get run over by Bad Men Doing Terror, first.
more likely i'd be hit by a brit an run
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Hyperflake
from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-06-23 23:43 [#02523061]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02523047
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letting you handle a soldering iron so young must have alot of faith in you, when i had one i burnt a hole through my school blazer
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-06-24 00:24 [#02523067]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02523048 | Show recordbag
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i didnt weight them of course, but i would say some 10-15 grams. less the weight of an empty tin.
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-06-24 00:36 [#02523070]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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no kidding you, when i took her in my room her ass wasnt in control, told to be 'old' and therefore more subject to incontinence, i gave her her dignity back.
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-07-10 21:45 [#02524530]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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with the heat she has back to the uncontrollable mode, this morning the janitor here surprised her pooping in the garden inside the building property, he said to me 'its becoming a whorehouse' i said 'im sorry, i am picking that up'
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-07-10 21:48 [#02524531]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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*is
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RussellDust
on 2017-07-10 22:07 [#02524539]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker | Followup to mohamed: #02523070
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What??
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RussellDust
on 2017-07-10 22:07 [#02524540]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker | Followup to mohamed: #02524530
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Wha, ah ok.
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-07-10 22:07 [#02524541]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Followup to RussellDust: #02524539 | Show recordbag
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i was talking about my dog
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mohamed
from the turtle business on 2017-07-10 22:09 [#02524542]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag
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could have fit for my sister as well
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