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taking a break

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2017-03-19 12:02 [#02515870]
Points: 8268 Status: Lurker

just before last christmas, i got an email from my mom. it
more or less read, "you're welcome to come over for
christmas. oh, yeah, and your father has parkinson's

when he was diagnosed with cancer two or so years ago, she
more or less did the exact same shit, even though my father
told her not to tell me. i'm sure he told her not to tell me
this time, too.

depending on her mood, my mom will either love me or hate
me. look up "borderline personality disorder" on wikipeda,
study the character of livia soproano, and you more or less
have the idea. she is a manipulative nutter completely held
hostage by her own paranoia and emotion. my dad is alright,
but useless.

the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, i have to admit.
the only bit of luck is that, having been able to watch it
happen to someone else (gradually destroying relationships,
denying it, destroying more) i've been on the lookout for
that death spiral, and avoided it as best i can.

once i saw what was going on, i really tried to help my mom
out. tried to talk. it was a disaster. she almost killed me.
literally punched me, throwing shit at me. that was it. i
was done. i ran. i got the fuck out of there.

from time to time, they reach out and lob grenades. mom's
christmas present was "dad has parkinson's." oh, you
shouldn't have

now i get am email from dad: the dog died. mom's had a heart
attack. we're being sued and we have to sell the house. you
should come get your stuff out of the basement.

they live three hours away. i don't have the gas money to
get there. the car needs new brakes. i'm about to owe
thousands in taxes; i have $3 in my paypal account. i am
genuinely scared.

you guys know me better than my own family does, at this
point. this board has been a happy place for me. i'm going
to be a mess over the next few weeks, and i don't want to
risk taking it out on anyone here. love you all. see you
when things get better.


offline fleetmouse from Gorilla Mind Smooth on 2017-03-19 14:03 [#02515871]
Points: 17596 Status: Regular

don't know if you'll be back to read this before your hiatus
but best wishes, hope better days are ahead


offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-03-19 14:28 [#02515872]
Points: 9864 Status: Addict

All the best mate, I really hope you get to the other side
of this, dont like to hear anyone suffering unnecessarily


offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2017-03-19 15:41 [#02515875]
Points: 2281 Status: Lurker

sounds terrible, here's hoping you have better luck soon my


offline mohamed on 2017-03-19 18:10 [#02515877]
Points: 19501 Status: Addict | Show recordbag

love ur mum, good luck!


offline umbroman3 on 2017-03-19 18:13 [#02515878]
Points: 991 Status: Regular

all the best to you


offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2017-03-19 21:06 [#02515879]
Points: 20630 Status: Regular

I suspect selling a house takes a long ass time, maybe a
year, so you maybe have time to scrounge up funds, or you
could politely tell them you have no funds to drive there if
it's a fact, or it could maybe be shipped to you, or maybe a
note could be left for whoever buys it to please store that
stuff in the basement until it can be picked up. Some argue
that tax is theft and thus getting turbo tax and fudging the
numbers until zero is owed is merely self defense from being
stolen from, since indeed zero is often available to be
paid, I mean it's like a mafia shakedown of someone with no
funds. One might tell all the CEOs and the 20 people that
supposedly have half the world's wealth to put your "taxes"
on their bill. I mean, in theory, I'm not advocating
anything. Oh, but of course turbo tax... costs money too.
Buying it is basically part of the tax, another fee to a
large corporation, or maybe just the single cartel if that's
what it is. Sorry; good luck.


offline SignedUpToLOL from I will die on 2017-03-20 18:42 [#02515880]
Points: 1401 Status: Regular



offline mohamed on 2017-03-20 18:50 [#02515881]
Points: 19501 Status: Addict | Followup to SignedUpToLOL: #02515880 | Show recordbag

i bet you're lolling at the 'you know me better than anyone
else' stuff


offline RussellDust on 2017-03-20 19:29 [#02515882]
Points: 7796 Status: Regular

I hate to be the one, but life is at times, and I'm sure for
most, excruciatingly tough. We're a fucking emotional
species, which doesn't help.

For example I could type:

My parents split up when I was 3, no stability throughout my
childhood, dad's had 4 heart attacks, as a teen I lived on
the street for a period, I went through a slow 3 year
suicide attempt recently (severe depression, addiction, self
hatred) my mum is more up and down than a yoyo, I have a
very difficult illness to deal with, blah fucking blah.

I've also lived amazing times, and have always preferred the
optimistic approach.

You're a smart, interesting bloke, EMT. Use your logic to
overcome this shit time, and rise. Use your brain, be good
to yourself. Good to others.

I'm sure your point here isn't for us all to feel sorry for
you. At least I hope so. You can't really measure suffering.
If a person suffers, it suffers, even if another sufferer on
the planet wouldn't condone their suffering. It's relative,
and the really issue is: can you deal with it, rise, and
possibly learn from it on the way.


offline RussellDust on 2017-03-20 19:30 [#02515883]
Points: 7796 Status: Regular

It's all about the really issue.


offline AMPI MAX from United Kingdom on 2017-03-20 19:48 [#02515884]
Points: 9458 Status: Regular

guys i gotta tell you. im actually currently fat where as
epic was only fat before.


offline mohamed on 2017-03-20 20:03 [#02515885]
Points: 19501 Status: Addict | Show recordbag

my parents also split up when i was three. prove yourself
before them while they're alive


offline mohamed on 2017-03-20 20:05 [#02515886]
Points: 19501 Status: Addict | Show recordbag

im not sure to tell you you have to crash your head on the
wall like everyone and come out of shit with the sembiances
of a person


offline mohamed on 2017-03-20 20:13 [#02515887]
Points: 19501 Status: Addict | Show recordbag

health is the biggest issue, both for you and your
relatives. do as you can, dont fall into emotional traps,
you can feel you're not being respected sometimes but
passing over it makes you stronger, never feel enslaved.
give what you can, don't overlook you're being given as
well, dont take it for granted. people might be closer to
death than you are


offline mohamed on 2017-03-20 20:17 [#02515888]
Points: 19501 Status: Addict | Show recordbag

i mean people might be looking at death from a closer
perspective than yours


offline mohamed on 2017-03-20 20:24 [#02515889]
Points: 19501 Status: Addict | Show recordbag

age means actually nothing, as you can find old bastards
trying to shit you in their mind business anytime. but im
not sure its the case of your family.


offline mohamed on 2017-03-20 20:27 [#02515890]
Points: 19501 Status: Addict | Show recordbag

also if you rely on that bullshit thread in the means that
people knows you as a person for some stupid bullshit text
you chose to type, you're actually fucked up, to put it the
american way


offline mohamed on 2017-03-20 20:45 [#02515891]
Points: 19501 Status: Addict | Show recordbag

dig deeper with them, dont come here and bullshit us like we
know you better than them.


offline AMPI MAX from United Kingdom on 2017-03-20 20:47 [#02515892]
Points: 9458 Status: Regular

eat lots and relax i dont care if im fat honestly. things
arent so bad. all of you try to cheer up


offline mohamed on 2017-03-20 20:52 [#02515893]
Points: 19501 Status: Addict | Show recordbag

you see, ampi is fat, hes having fun with food, lucky him,
you rob eggs from your flatmates, i do like ampi two days a
week, i eat a lot of dates and make liquid shit


offline mohamed on 2017-03-20 21:01 [#02515894]
Points: 19501 Status: Addict | Show recordbag

seriously now if you're actually looking for help out there
never try to fool anyone into any fucking joke, be dead


offline freqy on 2017-03-21 11:57 [#02515901]
Points: 14023 Status: Addict | Show recordbag

Best wishes Epics.!

Hope your parents get well soon; and you find some peace and

freqy x.


offline mohamed on 2017-03-21 22:21 [#02515969]
Points: 19501 Status: Addict | Show recordbag

listen to big calm by morcheeba or some buddha bar


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