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 Now online (1)dariusgriffin ...and 105 guests Last 5 registered Oplandisks nothingstar N_loop yipe foxtrotromeo Browse members... |
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Members 8025Messages 2613412 Today 4 Topics 127499 |
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how would you devolve this chap? disqus. |
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stick him in a washing machine full of hammers |
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stick him in a bathyscaphe down the bottom of Marianas trench, then get a everyone to piss down the oxygen line |
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a wrestling machine. hmm. tiers morgan won't be moving on to the next bracket, methings |
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tiers morgan and the wrestling machine, a moving three-part saga on TBS ~ the superstation. |
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I hate him 99% of the time, the other 1% he's on question time with either Emily thornberry or Diane abbot and he makes me laugh |
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Thing is about Piers Morgan is that if there ever was a complete fascist take over in the UK he would probably get a cushy job in the propaganda ministry to present the tv and he wouldnt bat an eyelid |
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*clears throat* Piles Morgan thank you |
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put him on a rocket sled with a septic tank at the far end |
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he is a goblin that was chased away from his underground society for being an abomination |
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say the world is ending and he has to get on a rocketship with all the other z list celebs and then blast the rocket into the sun |
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Who else would be on the rocket with him though? Surely if he looks around and sees katie hopkins, vernon kaye, fern britton & chris evans sat there he's going to know something's up. |
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as soon as they boarded they would be given a strong sedative and bruce forsyth would entertain them over the PA system as they nodded off |
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also restraints would automatically clamp down on their limbs |
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David van day from dollar would be the captain all he would have to do would be to press a big red button |
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danny dyer would be co pilot |
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I can't think of anything worse than Danny dyer coming over the intercom to tell you about your upcoming journey |
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you mean like him wanking whilst using the intercom? "right....urgggh.... you fakkin slags..... oooooooooooohh... apples and pairs.... oooo" |
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im strongly opposed to eugenics, but when you see danny dyer on tv you think for half a second if it would be so bad |
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Calls Ewan McGregor a "paedophile lover". had to read on to make sense of the term. |
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yeah like he has some superior moral cachet when he hacks dead kids phones the gutter snipe |
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i bet when he is in posh restaurants people piss in his soup, i dont condone that behavior whatsoever except when its him |
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have a look at his twitter feed. he is already a deeply broken person - always going on about his brother being in the forces, how he's mates with the donald... |
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Wait til he's on his death bed then get a long line of people to whisper to him world would have been a better place if he'd never existed. |
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Blunt, sincere, whispers. |
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have a look at his twitter feed. he is already a deeply broken person this could be said of most anyone with a twitter feed, really... but, no, i've had to sort this one out before, and i'm familiar with it: tiers morgan does not read xltronic. he does not read this thread. he does not, will not, know of our existence, let alone taking him down a wretling machine or four... and he will -- will -- continue to remain a celebrity for a forseeable future, in the media, visible to all of us. tweeting. being a wanker so, yes, i had a nice, solid think about all the people who go about saying, "be nice!" and i came to the conclusion that being nice is a thing that runs out. often all too soon... not quite as often as my wallet runs out, but often enough. so why waste being nice on tiers morgan? let's all take a moment and have a whack and get it out it's cathartic innit |
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stick him in a washing machine full of hammers a journal once descrived the music of the aphex twin as "a waterfall of a thousand hammers." after a moment of thought, i selected ball-peen for this visualization |
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i was thinking, potential pressure point there.. psychological torture is always better than physical. More challenging, more rewarding. |
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i was thinking: he can't even google this thread. not on porpoise, anyways... but, i suppose everything is connected. eventually, even kevin bacon feels the ripples of every xltronic thread. ever |
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yes put him into an infinite fractal maze completely in the dark, every so often is a dispenser of rudimentary nutrients to sustain his life force, to get hydration he would have to lick the damp granite obelisks scattered in a non repeating pattern. at every junction would be a book in braille that contained every insult ever uttered about him. He would be pursued by demonic flesh eating worms that inch slowly but inexorably to his location. |
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there's a fatal flaw in your dungeon design: tiers morgan can't fucking read braille |
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meanwhile British TV personality and British author J.K. Rowling are in a Twitter war over American politics ~ you get what you give Comedian Jim Jeffries tells to fuck off on TV ~ the kevin bacon waves of this xltronic thread beach up upon the morgan |
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its only a mental construct you have to suspend belief! ok their is some sort of rosetta stone of braille that he would have the rest of infinity to contemplate |
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peirs morgan sort of a bellwether of when to have a contrary opinion on something |
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actually being Piers Morgan is an of itself punishment enough, a fate we were all lucky to avoid |
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ok their is some sort of rosetta stone of braille that he would have the rest of infinity to contemplate hmm... yes.... so, he spends seven years learning braille in the dark... in between scavenging for nutrients.... years of effort... only to find the reams of braille talking about in no uncertain terms that sounds a bit better, yes. |
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peirs morgan sort of a bellwether of when to have a contrary opinion on something i believe it's spelled bellend |
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i'm sure he is the wretched product of a humunculus butt fucking a hobbit |
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a specially designed tiers-morgan-aware wiFi hotspot that detects the presence of tiers morgan and repeatedly cuts off his wireless when he gets 2/3 of the way through writing a tweet on twatter |
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yeah that would be perfect, |
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stage one: procure a DJI phantom V quadrocopter developer drone. stage two: program the drone to relentlessly seek out the most unflattering angles to photograph tiers morgan from stage three: live posts to instagram as fate provides |
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he needs a dose of the total perspective vortex |
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yes his little pevish concave mug, |
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take it from some axonometric angles gurning |
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custom carl zeiss (tm) optics on drone provide genuine optical zoom capable of resolving a zit from five kliks with a twenty-knot wind |
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a three-man team of crack fatmen to fart nearby tiers morgan as often as they can manage (hint: quite often) |
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a flock of 2^5 pigeons b. f. skinner has trained to poop on the whip ("car") of one (1) tiers morgan |
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cunt |
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