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toilets, the hidden source of vice
 

offline illfates from space (United States) on 2015-10-16 23:43 [#02489521]
Points: 844 Status: Regular



As soon as that dopamine starts flowing: woomf, its time to
poo.. ..and where better to poo than in the toilet in your
bathroom. What you probably didn't know is that your toilet
is making you an impatient, depraved, self-gratifying
without patient delay, addict. You see, when you hunker
down on the porcelain throne to growl out a megaturd, you're
feeding more than your friend John, you're feeding the
monkey on your back, and in your butt.

When you sit atop the ring of immediate gratification, your
soul immediately begins a trail of tears out your rectum.
First you relax onto your buttcheeks and your pelvic floor
collapses, oozing your core muscles towards hemorrhoidal
tragedy as you grunt and gasp your way to defecatory climax.
As your colon and its contents find solace in their new
home far below your rectum, your innards have performed a
transformation much like those tubules inside tubules known
as water-weanies. The insides have come out, and your neck
and throat have been pulled down towards the can. Then you
rest and feel the relief flood over you as your poor
ignorant body relaxes further, unburdened by its load of
toxic brown ejaculate, rewarding itself as nature programmed
us to do. This is the reward system, the foundation of
addiction.

Imagine one has used all of one's personal strength to hover
above the lid and not give in to the temptation to lose
oneself in the previous paragraph's descriptatum: toned
calves and arches support one's humanoid legs and knees as a
tidy brown vessel of self control deposits itself in the
basin below. No wae of relaxation, no-- the stalwart
reassurance that things are going to be okay. One is
building discipline, building anal tensor strength, a
foundation for the pelvic floor that won't immediately lead
to the instant gratification associated with that travesty
known as the toilet seat (or as it may be referred to, The
Unholy Maw). One wipes the small amount of doo-doo which
has been pinched into a perfect rosebud of inconvenience and
deposit


 

offline illfates from space (United States) on 2015-10-16 23:50 [#02489522]
Points: 844 Status: Regular



the moistly soiled toilet paper in the hellhole which is
safely below your root balance. One rises to the upright
position which most elegantly characterizes the late
evolutionary form of the humanoid, and experiences.. the
reward. The reward which was delayed long enough to regain
bowel composure, the reward which was earned, which was not
clawed at mindlessly like overfed carrion picking the last
of the offal-- the dopamine which has been justly earned for
a job well done. One is not an addict, one is a citizen of
the new world, free of the tyranny of your mindless
obedience to the Western Porcelain Cult. Fighting the
disorder known as addiction begins every day as we rise from
our hovels to complete our nocturnal emission cycle with a
glorious morning poo that builds character and thigh
strength. We are not addicts when one fights the monkey in
your butt and in your bathroom.

brought to you by the department for healthy pubic
symphises, international.


 

offline fleetmouse from Horny for Truth on 2015-10-18 14:44 [#02489529]
Points: 18042 Status: Lurker



[nods sagely] "Pudding."


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2015-10-19 05:28 [#02489532]
Points: 23949 Status: Addict



vice is alright, but i wish you could download their videos


 

offline jnasato from 777gogogo (Japan) on 2015-10-19 23:38 [#02489533]
Points: 3393 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



If addiction is healthy, it's called discipline.


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2015-10-19 23:58 [#02489534]
Points: 30707 Status: Regular



I wonder what its like to lay a cable in zero G, without
gravity assist bet its really hard to get rid of clagnuts


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2015-11-01 06:06 [#02489710]
Points: 23949 Status: Addict | Followup to Hyperflake: #02489534



it's like this


 


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