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How do you dress?
 

offline RussellDust on 2013-04-16 19:21 [#02454107]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02454106



What, like killing 450 wild pigs with a machine gun riding a
helicopter?


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2013-04-16 19:31 [#02454108]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



how to by pants
a guide for hopeless neckbeards

1. Go to a clothes store. If you need instructions for this,
I'm afraid you'll have to find an additional how-to on the
topic.

2. Locate pants that seem like the sort of thing you might
wear.

3. Pick a pair, unfold it, and hold it up to your waist. It
should be a bit wider than you, since it's flat. Legs should
touch the floor, just barely. If it seems way too big or too
small, put it back and try another.

4. Take 3-4 pairs that cover a small range around the "looks
like it'd fit" zone to the dressing room.

5. Try them on. If they feel tight, they do not fit. If
they're above your ankles, they do not fit. If there is more
than an inch or so of fabric on the floor, they do not fit.
Look at yourself in the mirror. If you do not like how they
look, they do not fit. If you're not sure how they look,
you're probably still OK.

6. If none of those 3-4 pairs fit, go back into the store
and get more (remember to put your original pants back on
first, though!). Don't worry about putting them back on the
rack; the store staff is like your mom and will pick up
after you.

7. When you find one that fits, this is YOUR SIZE. Note the
length, width, and pant style.

8. If you want more than one pair of pants, repeat steps
2-7. You'll note that different brands, different styles
"run" slightly differently; e.g. the size numbers vary. Even
if you know your size, always try before buy.

9. If you're totally lost, ask the store staff. They know
just as much as your mom, if not more. This is actually not
a bad way to meet women.

10. If all else fails, have your mom take you to the store
and teach you what this guide has failed to teach you



===Yours pantily,
EpicMegaPants


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2013-04-16 19:32 [#02454109]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular | Followup to RussellDust: #02454107



no, like shitting in his pants for a week before showing up
to the draft board in order to get out of going to vietnam.
as well as being a fucking jerk.


 

offline Monoid from one source all things depend on 2013-04-17 00:51 [#02454144]
Points: 11005 Status: Regular



I found some style guides on the net. I only need money to
buy new clothes.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2013-04-17 01:02 [#02454145]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



that is also an entirely seperate howto.

monoid, you're a waste of my time. i will not write any more
guides for you


 

offline Monoid from one source all things depend on 2013-04-17 02:47 [#02454148]
Points: 11005 Status: Regular



What is the IDM fashion style for men? Is there any?


 

offline Portnoy on 2013-04-17 04:52 [#02454149]
Points: 1491 Status: Regular



Larry David style.


 

offline Monoid from one source all things depend on 2013-04-17 05:26 [#02454151]
Points: 11005 Status: Regular



I want to know how to dress and i want to get rid of my
psychological problems concerning clothing.


 

offline jnasato from 777gogogo (Japan) on 2013-04-17 12:07 [#02454162]
Points: 3393 Status: Regular | Followup to Monoid: #02454148 | Show recordbag



IDM fashion = 2+ inches larger waist jeans that are beatup,
grey hoodie, facial hair or none, scraggly hair or pony tail
or bald, acne and oily or smooth skin, extremely stupid
skinny or lazy-fat, hunched over posture from overuse of
laptop. For IDM shoes: shiny leather tap dancing shoes.


 

offline hedphukkerr from mathbotton (United States) on 2013-04-17 16:57 [#02454176]
Points: 8833 Status: Regular | Followup to jnasato: #02454162



you forgot: no girlfriend


 

offline listen2meTalk on 2013-04-18 21:14 [#02454313]
Points: 575 Status: Addict



Someone in this thread wears nothing but pajama pants. I'll
give you a hint (it's not me.)

<3


 

offline -crazone from smashing acid over and over on 2013-04-18 21:31 [#02454318]
Points: 11228 Status: Regular | Followup to Monoid: #02454148 | Show recordbag



I've been wearing it for over ten years: jeans, idm related
T-shirt, sneakers. Can't go wrong, well.. maybe.. with the
sneakers or jeans..just keep those plain and simple and
you'll be fine.


 

offline listen2meTalk on 2013-04-22 15:26 [#02454581]
Points: 575 Status: Addict



You can't go wrong with black skinny jeans, a black and
white-tripped mime shirt, a terrorist scarf, a knit cap,
oversized sunglasses and chuck taylors.


 

offline detheel on 2013-11-07 18:44 [#02464228]
Points: 240 Status: Addict



You can't go wrong with DUBturbo


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2013-11-07 18:54 [#02464232]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



i'm curious if monoid ever followed my guide.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2015-07-12 18:22 [#02487689]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



monoid's identity revealed (?)


 

offline larn from PLANET E (United Kingdom) on 2015-07-12 23:00 [#02487690]
Points: 5473 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



Before you do anything grow a large beard, it suggests you
are very manly and rugged. Then tone it down with skinny
coloured trousers that go to your ankles, some socks pulled
up, pointy shoeslike from victorian times , that's to show
you are original and creative. Then a tight tee-shirt that
will really throw people off about your sexuality.


 

offline EVOL from a long time ago on 2015-07-13 06:42 [#02487692]
Points: 4921 Status: Lurker



i wear black on the outside cuz black is how i feel on the
inside


 

offline obara from Utrecht on 2015-07-16 21:02 [#02487726]
Points: 19368 Status: Lurker



I wear some trousers and a t-shirt saying "monoid". wins me
some free sex every time.


 

offline obara from Utrecht on 2015-07-16 21:05 [#02487727]
Points: 19368 Status: Lurker



nah, bad joke. just trousers and t-shirt. hopefully my post
helps you, Monoid. good luck.


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2015-07-17 12:29 [#02487732]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker | Followup to larn: #02487690



i noticed the beard thing that young men seem to have
nowadays, is it some sort of fashion statement, that and the
drain pipe trousers and little elf shoes


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2015-07-17 12:33 [#02487733]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker



personally i dress like a spiv from a Syrian refugee camp,
mismatching fake brands and facial hair that is just
slightly long enough to make women uncomfortable


 

offline fleetmouse from Horny for Truth on 2015-07-17 12:44 [#02487734]
Points: 18042 Status: Lurker



I wear dad shorts with cargo pockets and I sleep in a cargo
pocket on a bread mattress eating bread


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2015-07-17 13:14 [#02487735]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker



^ too high fashion for me


 

offline fleetmouse from Horny for Truth on 2015-07-17 18:29 [#02487737]
Points: 18042 Status: Lurker | Followup to Hyperflake: #02487735



they have mustard stain


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2015-07-17 20:58 [#02487739]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker



Mr Mustard


 

online belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2015-07-18 08:58 [#02487743]
Points: 6384 Status: Lurker



i put cloths on lol


 

offline HIGHLANDER from Israel on 2015-07-18 09:20 [#02487745]
Points: 394 Status: Regular



There's the arse from the bitchass clit conflict.


 

offline -crazone from smashing acid over and over on 2015-07-21 20:38 [#02487761]
Points: 11228 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



Do you like being naked monoid?


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2017-03-02 14:41 [#02514392]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



relaxed dressing centrist adherent to the right-first school
of enpanting


 

offline RussellDust on 2017-03-02 14:48 [#02514394]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker



To the right.


 

offline RussellDust on 2017-03-02 14:49 [#02514395]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker



To the nines.


 

offline mohamed from the turtle business on 2017-03-03 23:39 [#02514426]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



just like my gym professor at high school


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2017-03-04 02:16 [#02514441]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



gyms don't have professors.


 

offline mohamed from the turtle business on 2017-03-04 11:07 [#02514449]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Followup to EpicMegatrax: #02514441 | Show recordbag



they have, mine was sleeping the whole time while we played
basketball and the chicks smoked their spliffs


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-03-04 13:28 [#02514451]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker



i used to dress quite cool, now i dress like a middle aged
bloke you see on a sofa advert


 

offline RussellDust on 2017-03-04 17:04 [#02514454]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker



Went to buy some jeans yesterday. My god it's not easy
trying to find a pair that isn't ultra skinny. Finally found
a normal pair, but it wasn't straight sailing. Skinny,
ripped...I don't mind jeans that aren't too loose but when
they shape your thighs it's a bit ridiculous. I'm too tall
for this shit anyway. Got a blue jumper as well, and my
first pair of trainers in a while. Some NB, two tones (upper
in one color, soles in another). I like that they're
understanded with no visible branding.

I used to collect Nikes. Stopped the mess 4-5 years ago. It
had been an obsession since 1989.

Isn't it lovely, xlt talking shop. I saw watmm folk follow
what Ae are wearing. They even know how much Sean's latest
coat costs.


 

offline RussellDust on 2017-03-04 17:05 [#02514455]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker



Understated*


 

offline mohamed from the turtle business on 2017-03-04 19:42 [#02514471]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



i dress the most carhartt i can.


 

offline freqy on 2017-03-04 19:46 [#02514474]
Points: 18724 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



sprinkles, you´re right.

I cant get jeans either.

they like put lines of bleach in them to make them look
older and worn out or they rip them. or some cra-p.

they wreck them.

or they are skinny at the ankle. so the tongue of my shoes
stick out.

ergggg.



 

offline freqy on 2017-03-04 19:47 [#02514476]
Points: 18724 Status: Regular | Show recordbag




do you have a carhartt tattoo or cut/trimmed in your hairs
yet?


 

offline freqy on 2017-03-04 19:48 [#02514477]
Points: 18724 Status: Regular | Show recordbag




if i had a time machine, first thing, id go and get some
jeans.


 

offline mohamed from the turtle business on 2017-03-04 19:49 [#02514478]
Points: 31145 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



i dont have hair, but i have a pharaoh tattoo on my right
shoulder, like a slave


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2017-03-04 19:54 [#02514479]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker



its depressing when you waist becomes like 2 inches longer
than your leg length


 

offline RussellDust on 2017-03-04 20:12 [#02514490]
Points: 16053 Status: Lurker



Early nineties I had this carhartt jacket in this killer
blue. I remember trying to nick it but eventually having to
rake it in.

Yeah freckles, it's getting ridiculous.


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2017-03-05 01:35 [#02514573]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular | Followup to RussellDust: #02514454



They even know how much Sean's latest coat costs.

i'll write flip shit on here about how i want my weasels
replaced with a robotic sean booth, and then feel a bit
guilty about it. i enjoy painting chaps like him and aphex
into little cartoon meme characters and i'm not really sure
how chaps like him and aphex feel about this.

then, i read something like that, and breathe a sigh of
relief: no, i'm not that bad. i'm wondering if i should
occasionally check watmm for theraputic reasons. i may wear
a black north face jacket, but at least i'm not sure if it's
the same one sean wears. that's some trainspotting anorak
shit


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2017-03-05 01:38 [#02514574]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



i even feel like i've earned a bit of indulgence:

dear sean, could you please program an "elbow patch" on your
nord G2

thanks,
one of your more tolerable fans


 

offline EpicMegatrax from Greatest Hits on 2018-06-29 01:32 [#02555350]
Points: 25264 Status: Regular



bomp


 

offline Monoid from one source all things depend on 2018-06-30 23:48 [#02555442]
Points: 11005 Status: Regular



I an in my underpants right now. Thought i'd let you know


 

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2018-06-30 23:53 [#02555445]
Points: 31006 Status: Lurker | Followup to Monoid: #02555442



I reckon that's how trump talks dirty to merkel


 


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