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A black man is coming to my house
 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 18:16 [#02393374]
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A black guy (African) phoned me and said he is coming to my
house at 7pm tonight, then hung up.

I am a bit scared, TBH.

What should I do?

The sooner you reply the better, as I only have 44 minutes
left (perhaps to live...). Thanks in advance for any
life-saving advice.

Tractern



 

offline Indeksical from Phobiazero Damage Control (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 18:17 [#02393375]
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What have you done?


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 18:19 [#02393376]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Followup to Indeksical: #02393375 | Show recordbag



I don't even know! :(


 

offline Indeksical from Phobiazero Damage Control (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 18:21 [#02393377]
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Take it like a man. What's the worst that could happen?


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 18:30 [#02393382]
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hi ladyboi,

lol! is my response to the pic.

I recognise his voice as that of a black man.

If he looks like that I won't be too scared.

If he tries to do a fuck on me, what would you advise me
do?

Thanks


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 18:34 [#02393384]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Followup to Indeksical: #02393377 | Show recordbag



He could actually do a kill on me! :( THAT'S the worst that
could happen...


 

offline Indeksical from Phobiazero Damage Control (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 18:38 [#02393385]
Points: 10671 Status: Regular | Followup to Tractern: #02393384 | Show recordbag



That's not that bad...


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 18:40 [#02393387]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Followup to Indeksical: #02393385 | Show recordbag



:( !


 

offline Torture Garden from Feelin' 2Pacish on 2010-09-19 18:43 [#02393388]
Points: 974 Status: Lurker



watch home alone for some tips.


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 18:49 [#02393389]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Followup to Torture Garden: #02393388 | Show recordbag



haha, nice I like it! :D

Cheers Torture Garden, you're alright!


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 18:54 [#02393391]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Followup to : #02393390 | Show recordbag



Okay, that sounds good, thank you.

Should I not run, or something? There is a back door I might
be able to escape outta. I try this perhaps?

SHIT, 6 minutes to go!!! :O


 

offline Steinvordhosbn from London (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 18:55 [#02393392]
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Put on your web cam so we can all watch


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 18:57 [#02393393]
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hahaha! :D

No dice. Unless you're willing to pay?


 

offline Steinvordhosbn from London (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 19:00 [#02393394]
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I'm all out of cash, after Big bought people XLT memberships
the other day I thought I'd pay a black man to go over to
your house and bum you, as a treat.


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 19:03 [#02393395]
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It's 3 minutes past, maybe he forgot about me!

Here's to hoping eh, XL?


 

offline atwood from The Library (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 19:04 [#02393396]
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Man- up T.
ummmm...I mean...oh never mind.


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 19:04 [#02393397]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Followup to Steinvordhosbn: #02393394 | Show recordbag



lol, wow we are getting into the Christmas spirit early this
year, huh? :)

Unfortunately, I am not a gay. :/

Thanks for the thought though, Stein.


 

offline Steinvordhosbn from London (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 19:10 [#02393399]
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I wonder if the bumming has started yet?


 

offline j4ck from United Kingdom on 2010-09-19 19:27 [#02393400]
Points: 1102 Status: Regular



wtf happened then>?

bearing in mind you are in brighton, i fear the worst


 

offline goDel from ɐpʎǝx (Seychelles) on 2010-09-19 19:46 [#02393401]
Points: 10225 Status: Lurker



Hey black man! If you happen to read this, please post the
result of your encounter with mr T. Why, you ask? Because we
care! That's why!

*grabs some popcorn*


 

offline mermaidman on 2010-09-19 19:59 [#02393402]
Points: 8299 Status: Regular | Followup to goDel: #02393401



hope tractern didn't log out and left this thread on the
screen


 

offline jnasato from 777gogogo (Japan) on 2010-09-19 21:20 [#02393405]
Points: 3393 Status: Regular | Followup to Tractern: #02393374 | Show recordbag



That'd be nuts if Tito Jackson came over and started singing
ABC, all naked and covered in baby oil.

Good luck, though. Hopefully this thread isn't posted in
the news after "authorities find your corpse", etc.


 

offline atwood from The Library (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 21:26 [#02393406]
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Tito and Tractern sitting in a tree,B-U-M-M-I-N-G.

Childish?
Me?



 

offline glasse from Harrisburg (United States) on 2010-09-19 21:50 [#02393407]
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//Did he say "I´m black"? Or could you tell?//

He said he was African. People from Africa have a distinct
accent.


 

offline Steinvordhosbn from London (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-19 22:03 [#02393408]
Points: 3185 Status: Regular | Followup to atwood: #02393406 | Show recordbag



Genuine lol.

The only thing that sobered me up was reflecting on the
sorry state of Tractern's arse now.


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-20 00:36 [#02393421]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Followup to mermaidman: #02393402 | Show recordbag



Haha, I was worried about that at one point, actually. :D


 

offline jnasato from 777gogogo (Japan) on 2010-09-20 00:46 [#02393424]
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This thread reminded me that I did an animation in reply to
EAT DA POO POO, but I didn't care to finish it. However,
here's the raw audio of it.....

Man, I gotta get around to finishing more SHIT.


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-20 00:46 [#02393425]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



Okay, here's what happened:

We watched Family Guy, we went and bought some wine, he gave
me some useful relationship advice and then we watched MOTD,
then more Family Guy and then he left.

No bum fucking, but other fun, including free wine, FUCK
YEAH!

Thanks for the concern, everyone!

Now watching the film Envy (with Jack Black and Ben
Stiller). Anyone seen it?


 

offline Geoffrey Mills on 2010-09-20 00:52 [#02393426]
Points: 498 Status: Regular



which team did he support? i bet it was arsenal


 

offline jnasato from 777gogogo (Japan) on 2010-09-20 00:52 [#02393427]
Points: 3393 Status: Regular | Followup to Tractern: #02393425 | Show recordbag



SAY WHAT? You hung out with a stranger watching wine fueled
Family Guy?


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-20 00:53 [#02393429]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Followup to Geoffrey Mills: #02393426 | Show recordbag



He said some stuff about liking Chelsea. He likes Chelsea,
but I am not sure if he supports them...


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-20 00:55 [#02393431]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Followup to jnasato: #02393427 | Show recordbag



Yeah, it was nice. :)

I'd recommend it to you, jnsanto. x


 

offline jnasato from 777gogogo (Japan) on 2010-09-20 00:56 [#02393433]
Points: 3393 Status: Regular | Followup to Tractern: #02393431 | Show recordbag



All right-- well, the next time a stranger calls me on the
phone- preferably African- I'll be sure to bust out the
alcohol and cartoons.


 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-20 01:07 [#02393434]
Points: 4210 Status: Regular | Followup to jnasato: #02393433 | Show recordbag



Good. :)

I liked your 'poo poo' audio, but the end bit was a bit
unnecessary I thought, cos it destroyed the illusion quite a
bit. Still enjoyed it though, especially the bit where he
almost said 'my greatest fantasy... fear' :D


 

offline jnasato from 777gogogo (Japan) on 2010-09-20 01:28 [#02393436]
Points: 3393 Status: Regular | Followup to Tractern: #02393434 | Show recordbag



Thanks! Well, it's the raw audio, cuz I didn't feel like
taking the end out. The end bits were the various reactions
for the middle of the video, cuz it was a video cutup thing,
with animation parts for the explanations.

Attached is an animation frame-- but the background and
foreground elements are actually not to scale, cuz the
background would've been zoomed in.


Attached picture

 

offline jnasato from 777gogogo (Japan) on 2010-09-20 01:29 [#02393437]
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also, the tape was not in frame, but that was for when the
pony is taped to the one homosexual's back (moved diagonally
off frame)


 

offline jnasato from 777gogogo (Japan) on 2010-09-20 01:31 [#02393438]
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and when they "merge into a massive power of anal licking",
the 2 and the onlookers fly together into a massive
homosexual robot thing and fly into space.


 

offline jnasato from 777gogogo (Japan) on 2010-09-20 01:33 [#02393439]
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merry go round that comes out of the floor, with ceiling
damage for later when the homo giant robot flew threw


Attached picture

 

offline Tractern from Brighton (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-20 01:33 [#02393440]
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It's pretty. :)


 

offline Peter File from the future!!! Ooooh chase me! on 2010-09-20 02:04 [#02393447]
Points: 2020 Status: Lurker



Not LCD Soundsystem's finest song, imho.


 

offline clark672010 on 2010-09-20 08:08 [#02393458]
Points: 398 Status: Lurker



really>? Unbelievable.


 

offline big from lsg on 2010-09-20 11:06 [#02393471]
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so he dialed your number randomly?


 

offline Indeksical from Phobiazero Damage Control (United Kingdom) on 2010-09-20 12:08 [#02393472]
Points: 10671 Status: Regular | Followup to clark672010: #02393458 | Show recordbag



Exactly what I was going to say.


 

offline cwnt on 2010-09-20 15:34 [#02393499]
Points: 951 Status: Regular



one time my mate was on CB radio
and his mum lives in a tin house from the 2nd world war
(protection from bombs and bird shit and shit)

so he was on CB radio going all 'o bre fuck u all bre. u all
come nad get me if u think yr hard bre'. and this old geezer
was on like channel 4 or some shit going all 'oi butty ill
come down and sort you out now like'. and my mate was all 'o
bre come on then bre u will never trace me bro'.

neway. my m8 was messing this shit for an hour... then the
car with a cb aerial pulls up outside the tin house and the
blokes just waiting there and shit. and my mate is all like
'o fuck bre hes right outside' and then the geezers on the
radio going 'oi butty i tracked you down butt you better not
do that again or ill fucken kill ew butt'



 

offline yann_g from now on 2010-09-20 20:33 [#02393559]
Points: 3772 Status: Lurker



what kind of a significant difference does his colour make?


 

offline big from lsg on 2010-09-20 20:41 [#02393560]
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makes it just a bit scarier, apparently.


 

offline yann_g from now on 2010-09-20 22:47 [#02393568]
Points: 3772 Status: Lurker | Followup to big: #02393560



interesting.


 

offline jnasato from 777gogogo (Japan) on 2010-09-21 05:56 [#02393599]
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In Tokyo there are a lot of Africans who own hip hop fashion
shops, but they have accents from Zimbabwe, etc. Not really
the most hardcore urban shit, but I suppose it's a good
business move.


 


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