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 (nobody)...and 337 guests Last 5 registered Oplandisks nothingstar N_loop yipe foxtrotromeo Browse members... |
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Members 8025Messages 2614081 Today 1 Topics 127542 |
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was based on a dream. |
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It's an okay story. |
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no! don't bump it! they . . . they'll come. |
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In my opinion, though, it falls apart in 4. and 5. The story's opening scenario was pretty good. I liked the story. Good job and stuff. |
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hey, thanks. the fault lies in the story being based directly on a dream. the only thing i really added to it was the characters. |
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Yeah, I was going to mention, "but it was based on your dream, so..." in the post you responded to. But I think that the only "fault" is your own. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to be an ass here. It's obvious that you were attempting to make a story out of your dream to "tell" to others. It was an adaptation if you will. You should have shaped it into something more than what it was as a dream. What you have now is good in my opinion. It's potentially a good little short story that just needs rewritting (if I may be so bold). Definitely rework 4. and 5. Not to mention that there are quite a few ideas laying around in there that are never tapped or used. Just my opinions and stuff. |
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no, you're completely right. i can't fault the dream. i'm glad you took the time to read it and share your thoughts. if i get around to rewriting any of it i'll definitely take what you've said into consideration. |
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