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merg
from The New New York (Berlin) (Germany) on 2005-03-17 04:40 [#01535909]
Points: 1708 Status: Regular
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Today, on the 15th anniversary of Nelson Mandela's release from Robben Island prison, came a timely reminder of the sacredness of freedom.
A team of researchers from the Universities of Riyadh has accidentally succeeded in scientifically proving that all people everywhere, including women (obviously), have a basic human right to live in freedom and democracy, free of political and ideological oppression. This is particularly ironic, as the research was carried out in one of the only countries to behead people for something as trivial as selling drugs, and was indeed originally aimed at proving that this punishment was morally justified. Instead, as so often happens, the researchers ended up proving something quite different.
"This is obviously slightly uncomfortable for us, ideologically speaking," said Ibrahim al-Backwardi, chair of the Saudi Kingdom's Islamic Repression Taskforce (SKIRT) when questioned about the research, before adding "Look behind you! Look, over there! Quick, you're gonna miss it!" and legging it out of a side door, obviously keen to fit in some more women repression before teatime.
The Saudi High-Commission for the Intimidation of Teachers, and Bounding And Gagging of Students (SHITBAGS) were also slightly embarrassed at how they managed to let this research be published, simply noting darkly that their weekly order of gags and nail-tearing-out equipment had been late last week.
Meanwhile, in the nearby Islamic Republic of Iran, reporters were unable to secure an interview with any mullah from the Ministry of Population Repression (PR), although they did issue a press release which read :
"The Iranian Ministry of PR denounces the so-called research as the work of The Great Satan, the United States of America, and its agents of evil, all of whom will perish in an eternal pit of fiery damnation."
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-03-17 04:42 [#01535913]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator
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hobbes, you know the drill.
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Bob Mcbob
on 2005-03-17 04:44 [#01535916]
Points: 9939 Status: Regular
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you got tomorrows newspaper today? you know the future?!?!
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hobbes
from age on 2005-03-17 04:45 [#01535917]
Points: 8168 Status: Lurker | Followup to qrter: #01535913
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I seem to have misplaced it.
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-03-17 04:46 [#01535918]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator | Followup to hobbes: #01535917
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oooooh...! you bumbling OAF...!!
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merg
from The New New York (Berlin) (Germany) on 2005-03-17 04:47 [#01535919]
Points: 1708 Status: Regular
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I dunno, one disappears for a year or two, and by the time one resurfaces you're all talking in code(!) :-)
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Bob Mcbob
on 2005-03-17 04:51 [#01535923]
Points: 9939 Status: Regular | Followup to merg: #01535919
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oh merg you are such a 327/AQ-5-p
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hobbes
from age on 2005-03-17 04:51 [#01535924]
Points: 8168 Status: Lurker
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Oh hang on....
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hobbes
from age on 2005-03-17 04:54 [#01535928]
Points: 8168 Status: Lurker | Followup to hobbes: #01535924
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Ah, image 3 seems to have changed. Must be somewhere, just forgot what it's called then.
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-03-17 04:55 [#01535929]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator
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hobbes
from age on 2005-03-17 04:59 [#01535930]
Points: 8168 Status: Lurker | Followup to qrter: #01535929
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Absolutely classic. :)
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hobbes
from age on 2005-03-17 05:00 [#01535931]
Points: 8168 Status: Lurker
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I'm well keen today.
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-03-17 05:01 [#01535933]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator | Followup to hobbes: #01535931
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you're Lord of the Board.
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hobbes
from age on 2005-03-17 05:02 [#01535934]
Points: 8168 Status: Lurker | Followup to qrter: #01535933
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Spelling mistake there.
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Bob Mcbob
on 2005-03-17 05:02 [#01535935]
Points: 9939 Status: Regular
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i feel like im watching a 'behind the scenes of xlt' show
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-03-17 05:03 [#01535937]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator | Followup to hobbes: #01535930
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another classic:
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hobbes
from age on 2005-03-17 05:10 [#01535941]
Points: 8168 Status: Lurker | Followup to qrter: #01535937
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I dunno why that one didn't surprise so much.
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merg
from The New New York (Berlin) (Germany) on 2005-03-17 05:11 [#01535942]
Points: 1708 Status: Regular
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:-)
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hobbes
from age on 2005-03-17 05:12 [#01535944]
Points: 8168 Status: Lurker | Followup to hobbes: #01535941
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"surprise me"
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qrter
from the future, and it works (Netherlands, The) on 2005-03-17 05:44 [#01535968]
Points: 47414 Status: Moderator | Followup to hobbes: #01535944
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