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boxrocket on 2001-12-10 00:44 [#00059345] | |||||||||
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i'm curious what opinions abound amongst the people at this board when it comes to the subject of self mutilation. i don't think mutilation is a good word, but that's the most common term, so let's use it. do you cut yourself sometimes? if so why and what does it make you feel? if not, what do you think of people who do and why? |
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Xanatos from NYC on 2001-12-10 01:01 [#00059349] | |||||||||
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No, I've never been into this or know anyone who does this, but I have some friends who are into body modification, so I at least know a little about what this is about. You can get a lot more information on places like the forum than you could here. |
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paperclip on 2001-12-10 01:06 [#00059352] | |||||||||
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i think people do it cause they are so fucked up that the only thing thats real in their lives is the pain they get from cutting themselves.. thats what some say.. "its the only thing thats real".. sounds fucked to me. |
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boxrocket on 2001-12-10 01:08 [#00059353] | |||||||||
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well, at the risk of being labelled a freak or nutcase or just plain sick by all of you, i must say that lately i've been cutting on myself a little here and there and i'm trying to find someone else who does this that i can talk to. it's not so much that i want to stop doing it, i just need to find someone who relates is all. thanks for the link. |
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PearlsGirrl from chicago on 2001-12-10 02:08 [#00059361] | |||||||||
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well, i have had some experience with that, and know other people who have, too. lemme just say that it is of no help. really. :( |
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Baron Von Picklefoot from From my "special" place on 2001-12-10 02:29 [#00059375] | |||||||||
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Hmmmm can you say why you do it ????THE BARON HAS SPOKEN!! |
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reduced on 2001-12-10 02:36 [#00059376] | |||||||||
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i hadn't cut in ages until recently. its the winter. people have there reasons. i do it mostly out of frustrating. just overwhelming powerlessness. i don't know. its comforting. |
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Ophecks from Nova Scotia on 2001-12-10 02:37 [#00059377] | |||||||||
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Hehe, the Baron was surprisingly un-strange right there. Well, I can't see why you'd do it, maybe it takes your mind off things, I dunno. |
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boxrocket on 2001-12-10 02:45 [#00059387] | |||||||||
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i have this problem with going up and down (emotionally). one day i can be thrilled, very happy, and the next day i'll be really fucking down about stupid shit. i don't want to take drugs because i've recently stopped doing drugs and i don't want to get back into that whole pile of shit all over again. i've just had a really rough week and last night some shit happened that topped it off so i went home and cut a bit. i donno, it just makes more sense....if i hurt emotionally and mentally, it feels "right" to hurt physically as well. |
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1010-1111-10 from St.John\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\'s Newfoundland, Canada on 2001-12-10 02:59 [#00059397] | |||||||||
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cant say i never did it. I think it lets you forget about everything because you are physically hurting and you have to focus on that. I don know, is only reason i can think of. Its strange tho, how so many do it. |
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Ophecks from Nova Scotia on 2001-12-10 03:09 [#00059407] | |||||||||
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Bi-polar? So am I, I think. The littlest things can completely change my mood, it's weird. |
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The_Funkmaster from Newfoundland, Canada on 2001-12-10 03:30 [#00059426] | |||||||||
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yeah I get up and down like that... but I've learned to catch myself when I'm down, and I just tell myself "Ok, there's nothing to be bumed about..." and I can usually, with some persistence, pick myself up again... |
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The_Funkmaster from Newfoundland, Canada on 2001-12-10 03:33 [#00059428] | |||||||||
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just look at some porn... it always gets me up if you know what I'm saying!!!! :) |
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1010-1111-10 from St.John\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\'s Newfoundland, Canada on 2001-12-10 03:36 [#00059430] | |||||||||
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lol yeah but when i do that a part of me looks down and says "is this the answer, will it be the answer tommorrow, how long will it answer the questions, or take your mind off them, because they always come back" |
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D-Hex from KC Missouri on 2001-12-10 03:37 [#00059433] | |||||||||
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Honestly,,,if you want to feel better let your friends and family know what is going on. I felt like shit all summer and i finally had to break down to my parents. I dont feel completely better but i feel a shit of a lot better then before. |
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boxrocket on 2001-12-10 03:39 [#00059435] | |||||||||
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numbers seems to be very much on the same page as i am. |
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The_Funkmaster from Newfoundland, Canada on 2001-12-10 03:39 [#00059436] | |||||||||
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yeah, all it takes is talking to someone close... I talked to my parents about something like that, and it did make me feel ok... |
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boxrocket on 2001-12-10 03:40 [#00059439] | |||||||||
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it's a very fucked up feeling to be so depressed you're cutting on yourself, and yet knowing the whole time that sometime soon (maybe tomorrow?) you'll be in a great mood all happy and positive again. |
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1010-1111-10 from St.John\\\\'s Newfoundland, Canada on 2001-12-10 03:42 [#00059441] | |||||||||
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knowing there are others is nice |
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The_Funkmaster from Newfoundland, Canada on 2001-12-10 03:43 [#00059443] | |||||||||
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well see that's the same with me... I get up, and then the next day I'll be down... it is weird, but I've realized that I'm like that, and so I tell myself that I don't have any reason to feel down if it's over something stupid, and think about all the reasons I have to feel great, and it usually works... you just have to get control over it... |
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D-Hex from KC Missouri on 2001-12-10 03:45 [#00059446] | |||||||||
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Do you guys experience any form of panic attacks also??? When im down i feel very nervous and my vision becomes blurred. Does this sound familiar to anyone? |
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boxrocket on 2001-12-10 03:46 [#00059447] | |||||||||
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knowing there are others is very nice indeed. i have to admit, just talking to you guys is making things a little better. thanks yo. |
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1010-1111-10 from St.John\\\\\\\\\'s Newfoundland, Canada on 2001-12-10 03:52 [#00059452] | |||||||||
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panic attacks.... hmm. Shit yes i get them. Its the sudden realization that something very bad is/will happen. Like when i wake up and i think its later then it is and i'm gonna be late for work and get fired (which would lead to very bad things), my vision almost shifts and i get a hudge rush but i come down very fast when i realize everything is ok. |
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boxrocket on 2001-12-10 04:02 [#00059457] | |||||||||
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i have panic attacks sometimes. hasn't happened very recently for some reason, but i do have them. it's like instantly i have a strong growing feeling that i'm losing control of myself. i feel like i'm gonna "flip out" and kill someone or just generally do something insane and illogical. i get scared and nervous, a great feeling of impending doom. |
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Xanatos from NYC on 2001-12-10 04:06 [#00059459] | |||||||||
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boxrocket: Although it seems like you have it under control, it really could become out-of-control, and you really should let family/close friends know how you feel. See if you can get through a rough time without it, listen to aphex, cry, and you might just come out of it just the same. There are serious dangers and risks in the way you are damaging your own body and you should try to get yourself out of it... |
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boxrocket on 2001-12-10 04:08 [#00059460] | |||||||||
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i've been listening to the deftones' "adrenaline" today, and it's helping a bit. |
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crayon_kid from the inner reaches of your soul... on 2001-12-10 04:21 [#00059473] | |||||||||
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i do it all the time. i dont see whats so strange about it. |
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D-Hex from KC Missouri on 2001-12-10 04:22 [#00059474] | |||||||||
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I get these panic attacks at the wierdest times. The 3 worst nights of my life involved them. The worst one i have ever had was at prom, i had a million thoughts running through my head and i almost couldnt talk to my best friends and my date! I felt like a fool, but in the end i knew it was bullshit like i know it is now. |
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Xanatos from NYC on 2001-12-10 05:32 [#00059487] | |||||||||
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We might have different musical tastes, but once I was really depressed and I listened to Squarepusher - A Journey to Reedham (7AM) Mix and it kind of reminded me of the good things in life... |
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Ophecks from Nova Scotia on 2001-12-10 05:42 [#00059488] | |||||||||
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yeah but when i do that a part of me looks down and says "is this the answer, will it be the answer tommorrow, how long will it answer the questions, or take your mind off them, because they always come back" EXACTLY. Couldn't of said it better myself. Right now I'm up, because my friend photoshopped my face onto an Angelina Jolie pic, we make a great couple. But, tomorrow I have 2 exams, BOOHOOBOOHOO!! Depressing. Now I'm down. |
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crayon_kid from the inner reaches of your soul... on 2001-12-10 06:56 [#00059500] | |||||||||
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aaaah for once i agree with you xanatose. big loada in general makes me happy |
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Xanatos from NYC on 2001-12-10 06:59 [#00059504] | |||||||||
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"for once"? ouch. Yea massif too... |
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Ceri JC on 2001-12-10 11:08 [#00059537] | |||||||||
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A diabetic friend used to cut himself and really mess himself up. It culminated with him hanging himself last year. Fucking tragic, really nice, bright young guy. |
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Aktium from bat country on 2001-12-11 05:10 [#00059705] | |||||||||
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i just keep saying that things will get better in the end. and it usually does. but i think emotional pain is good, it helps us evolve. we need depression sometimes to keep us in check. "happy people have no stories" ~~(therapy?) |
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Ceri JC on 2001-12-11 18:21 [#00059938] | |||||||||
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Yeah, it's okay to be upset, but, without meaning to sound like a social worker, you have to keep it in persepective and can't let it fuck you up too much. |
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The_Funkmaster from Newfoundland, Canada on 2001-12-11 19:05 [#00059959] | |||||||||
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man, you're cutting up your own body... that's what's wrong with it... there's no need to do that, just talk with someone about what's up, and find some other means to fix it... |
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The_Funkmaster from Newfoundland, Canada on 2001-12-11 19:07 [#00059962] | |||||||||
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yeah Ophecks, tell me about it... I had two exams yesterday, I have one tonight, and one tomorrow... it sucks, and I feel so overwhelmed with crap, that my head is gonna explode... but you know what, tomorrow night it's all over, and I'm off for like a month, and that makes me feel SOOOOOO good!!! :) |
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Ophecks from Nova Scotia on 2001-12-11 19:10 [#00059964] | |||||||||
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I did my last two exams yesterday, and I've been on the internet ALLLLL day today! |
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od from perth on 2001-12-12 13:57 [#00060258] | |||||||||
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i used to cut myself a little with a compass, just on my arms. never serious, just pissing around. its ncie how it goes itchy a while after. |
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Monoid on 2001-12-12 16:09 [#00060281] | |||||||||
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wHY WOULD ONE WANT TO HURT HIMSELF ? I don't understand.....maybe listen to Britney Spears instead.... |
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Dirtypriest from Denmark on 2001-12-12 19:24 [#00060323] | |||||||||
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Hmm... i thought i just needed to share my thoughts on this subject... Depression is a terrible thing. I suffer from it now and then. especially here in these winther months, waking up and its entirely black outside. But a key out that works for me, is the idea that all emotional states, can be transformed to something you like! transform your anger to being good at making decissions, and being fast thinking and sharp. in this model, depression is often found in people who thinks a lot, and are the creative sorts. So my doorway out of depression, have been drawing and reading! it helps me a lot. I reccomend books by spiritual guide andrew cohen. brilliant. TRANSFORM THE NEGATIVE ENERGIES! think happy! it sounds wery hippy, but think about it!. every bad thought is strictly, and i mean strictly, a self made up thing. LET IT GO! fuck the bad thoughts. use the energi to better things! If there is such things as heaven and hell, then we are in hell now! and we can leave it just like that! we make up our own little hells, of material thinking. like. one wants a new car. one gets the new car, and gets dissapointed because it only brings temporary pleasure. so you want a new car. Its an endless search after material pleasures, involving pain and suffering. THIS IS HELL! but as i said 10000 times... its in your own head so you have the oppertunity to let go of it!!!! DO IT YA CUNT! Go investigate andrew cohen, if you think this sounds interesting. He has a magasine called "What is enlightenment", and theres also a website somewhere... Go investigate ya depressed cunts!! |
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borix on 2001-12-13 12:02 [#00060510] | |||||||||
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In my humble opinion self mutilation is a way to vent tension and to get a feeling of self control. I myself experience a lot of mood swings and I used to bash the wall/door/whatever with my fists or head just to release tension. And I think it gives you a feeling of control over your missery. By hurting yourself YOU are in control of the pain. Now I am more used to my mood swings and they bother me less and I don't hit things. I'm more into releasing tension by dancing (on dance music or IN THE PIT!), shouthing whatever... listening to music that fits the mood (Adrenaline is pretty good when you're frustrated :) ). So I have found better ways to channel the hold back energy (<=tension). I always remember this line from Pantera: Been constantly so frustrated, I've moved mountains with less. When I channel my hate to productive, I don't find it hard to impress. Btw i think it is very brave of you (boxrocket) to put your shit on this board. Mucho respects man! |
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Sound Assassin from The Patent Office UK on 2001-12-13 12:11 [#00060512] | |||||||||
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You get a great high from it, but what a cop out.... Have fun. |
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The_Funkmaster from Newfoundland, Canada on 2001-12-13 14:47 [#00060550] | |||||||||
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yeah, good logic... by hurting yourself physically, you're in control of the pain... well maybe you are, but why not figure out a way to eliminate the pain, to stop it? Hurting yourself physically is no way to deal with emotional pain... |
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borix on 2001-12-13 15:10 [#00060555] | |||||||||
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That is what I mean. If you feel like crap all the time and you don't know why or where it is comming from, than hurting yourself could be a way to get a little control over it. Same with anorexia. They (the psycho 's/logists) say it is a sick way to get the ultimate control over ones body. Could be right but it is never that simple, so it is just a little peace of the puzzle. |
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borix on 2001-12-13 15:14 [#00060556] | |||||||||
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But of course it is not the solution (hurting yourself) but at that moment you don't know the solution and it's the only thing you got. So get help, talk to people, learn from your own actions to avoid repetitive behaviour. AVOID THE DOWNWARD SPIRAL! |
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The_Funkmaster from Newfoundland, Canada on 2001-12-13 15:27 [#00060561] | |||||||||
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Depression is in the mind... so you control it with your mind... not hurting the physical body... if you feel depressed, just look at all the good things you have, and it'll work... it worked for me... I used to be up, and then down constantly like that... but I've managed to get control of it simply by telling myself what I have to be happy about during the down times, or when I feel them coming on, and now I have control over it... with my mind... |
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Narkotic from Orange County, California, USA on 2001-12-13 16:36 [#00060584] | |||||||||
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i think self mutilation gets bad to where your cutting your penis or balls off, sticking a tube inside yourself to take a piss. look at www.bme.freeq.com these people enjoy doing this and get a hardon about it. |
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