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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2003-11-05 14:04 [#00936013]
Points: 21452 Status: Lurker
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Welcome, and congratulations on your desire to undertake a stimulating intellectual adventure. We have spent our lives studying this magnificent language coding system and we hope to provide you with the rich enjoyment it has given us.
Here is a typical sentence using the advanced cryptographic Zorg Latin grammar:
"Hizorg honeyzorg, I'mzorg homezorg. Arezorg youzorg readyzorg tozorg gozorg tozorg thezorg mallzorg?"
"What in the deep fat fried hell??? That crazy pile of nonsense cannot possibly contain any meaningful information..."
Don't worry! It is perfectly normal for you to be intimidated and confused at this stage. Don't give up yet.
Now, there are two important aspects of Zorg Latin. The first is deciphering and the second is encrypting. We will start with deciphering.
If this is your first time using Zorg Latin, you will likely be amazed at the following fact; most new users are. You can decipher any Zorg Latin sentence using just one... simple... mathematical equation! This equation is as follows:
Azorg + Bzorg +Czorg... = zorg(A + B + C...) - where A through C represent the set of all words in a typical english sentence, zorg represents zorg, and "..." represents any number of words thereafter added to eachother.
Now we're getting somewhere! Let us apply our new mathematical zorg understanding to our once hopelessly confusing sentence:
"zorg(Hi honey, I'm home. Are you ready to go to the mall?)
Ok, now we have a pretty good foundation of beginner zorg deciphering. Unfortunately advanced zorg deciphering is way beyond the scope of this post. But... how on earth does one go about encrypting normal english sentences into Zorg Latin???
Take a deep breath because you are going to love this. To encrypt Zorg Latin, one must merely reverse the equation used for deciphering! That's all there is to it! Let us encrypt this very sentence.
zorg(Let us encrypt this very sentence.)=
"Letzorg uszorg encryptzorg thiszorg veryz
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2003-11-05 14:05 [#00936015]
Points: 21452 Status: Lurker
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zorg(Let us encrypt this very sentence.)=
"Letzorg uszorg encryptzorg thiszorg veryzorg sentencezorg."
Bibliography:
Regular Latin, Pig Latin, and Zorg Latin: A Search for a Common Ancestor, by Bill Buttsinson (c) 1972
Zorg Latin as used in the Military, by Dave Watson (c) 1995
100 Ways to Eat and Smell Poop, by qrter (c) 2003
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eXXailon
from purgatory on 2003-11-05 14:07 [#00936019]
Points: 6745 Status: Lurker
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The fact that you spend so much time on typing this stuff is even funnier than the actual posts.
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2003-11-05 14:10 [#00936029]
Points: 21452 Status: Lurker | Followup to eXXailon: #00936019
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You would have shattered my ego and uncovered my deep psychological mental problems, but alas, I already know that I am a pathetic idiot.
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eXXailon
from purgatory on 2003-11-05 14:13 [#00936034]
Points: 6745 Status: Lurker | Followup to w M w: #00936029
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A certain percentage of what you post is actually humourous, so you DO have SOME potential, kid.
I'm gonna make a star out of you.
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Oddioblender
from Fort Worth, TX (United States) on 2003-11-05 14:14 [#00936037]
Points: 9601 Status: Lurker
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thiszorg postzorg iszorg educationalzorg.
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Oddioblender
from Fort Worth, TX (United States) on 2003-11-05 14:14 [#00936038]
Points: 9601 Status: Lurker
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btw, thank you for wasting two minutes of my life.
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Oddioblender
from Fort Worth, TX (United States) on 2003-11-05 14:17 [#00936046]
Points: 9601 Status: Lurker
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oh i mean...
byzorg thezorg wayzorg, thankzorg youzorg forzorg wastingzorg twozorg minuteszorg ofzorg myzorg lifezorg.
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2003-11-05 14:19 [#00936050]
Points: 21452 Status: Lurker | Followup to eXXailon: #00936034
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I don't want help becomming a star from someone whose face looks as retarded as yours. Qrter might be tired of being the brunt of all xltronic libel attacks, so I am thinking about using the name eXXailon from now on instead.
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eXXailon
from purgatory on 2003-11-05 14:22 [#00936053]
Points: 6745 Status: Lurker | Followup to w M w: #00936050
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hmm...that wasn't nearly as humourous as you can do.
how disappointing.
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w M w
from London (United Kingdom) on 2003-11-05 14:27 [#00936064]
Points: 21452 Status: Lurker
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Man, I hate people. I wonder if I belong in their phylum.
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Oddioblender
from Fort Worth, TX (United States) on 2003-11-05 14:31 [#00936069]
Points: 9601 Status: Lurker
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dozorg notzorg worryzorg wMwzorg! izorg stillzorg lovezorg youzorg!
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evolume
from seattle (United States) on 2003-11-05 15:40 [#00936200]
Points: 10965 Status: Regular
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"wMw... the other pink meat."
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ambsace
from canaDUH. on 2003-11-05 16:54 [#00936304]
Points: 6326 Status: Lurker
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zorgheart...
wait...dammit.
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tragedy
from Gloucester (United States) on 2003-11-05 17:04 [#00936320]
Points: 4423 Status: Lurker
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hellozorg
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eXXailon
from purgatory on 2003-11-05 17:21 [#00936341]
Points: 6745 Status: Lurker | Followup to tragedy: #00936320
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fo' shizzorg
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eXXailon
from purgatory on 2003-11-05 17:22 [#00936342]
Points: 6745 Status: Lurker | Followup to eXXailon: #00936341
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I don't know why the fuck I made that post a follow-upzorg!!!!! :O
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