Confucius Say... | xltronic messageboard
 
You are not logged in!

F.A.Q
Log in

Register
  
 
  
 
Now online (2)
big
dariusgriffin
...and 134 guests

Last 5 registered
Oplandisks
nothingstar
N_loop
yipe
foxtrotromeo

Browse members...
  
 
Members 8025
Messages 2613483
Today 9
Topics 127503
  
 
Messageboard index
Confucius Say...
 

offline flim-flam from In a cupboard, in the kitchen. (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-27 10:35 [#00367157]
Points: 751 Status: Lurker



Found these on a joke site & find them Real funny!

1: Passionate kiss like spider's web. Soon lead to undoing
of fly.
2: Virginity like bubble. One prick, all gone.
3: Man who run in front of car get tired.
4: Man who run behind car get exhausted.
5: Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.
6: Foolish man give wife grand piano. Wise man give wife
upright organ.
7: Man who walk thru airport turnstile sideways going to
Bangkok.
8: Man with one chop stick go hungry.
9: Man who scratches butt should not bite finger nails.
10: Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
11: Baseball is wrong... man with four balls cannot walk.
12: Panties not best thing on earth... but next to it.
13: War doesn't determine who is right. War determines who
is left.
14: Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in
cathouse.
15: Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
16: It take many nails to build crib... but one screw to
fill it.
17: Man who drive like hell bound to get there.
18: Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
19: Man who lives in glass house should change clothes in
basement.
20: Man who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs.

21: Man who farts in church sits in own pew.
22: Crowded elevator smells different to midget.
23: Difference between pick pocket and peeping tom is the
pick pocket snatches watches.
24: Gay Indian is also a brave sucker.
25: Man and mouse are the same... both end up in pussy.
26: Sex is like bridge game... don't need a partner if you
have good hand.



 

offline Joyrex from watmm.com (United States) on 2002-08-27 10:45 [#00367163]
Points: 1389 Status: Lurker



hmmmmm, racist, but funny all the same


 

offline flim-flam from In a cupboard, in the kitchen. (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-27 10:59 [#00367177]
Points: 751 Status: Lurker | Followup to Joyrex: #00367163



How racist??


 

offline Joyrex from watmm.com (United States) on 2002-08-27 11:03 [#00367184]
Points: 1389 Status: Lurker



moderately racist


 

offline flim-flam from In a cupboard, in the kitchen. (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-27 11:12 [#00367198]
Points: 751 Status: Lurker | Followup to Joyrex: #00367184



Sorry no....I mean how is it racist?


 

offline jonesy from Lisboa (Portugal) on 2002-08-27 11:38 [#00367230]
Points: 6650 Status: Lurker



The whole thing is mildly racist but this in particular:

24: Gay Indian is also a brave sucker.



 

offline pOgO from behind your belly button fluff on 2002-08-27 11:42 [#00367234]
Points: 12687 Status: Lurker



that's not tooooo racist, it's funny too =oD


 

offline jonesy from Lisboa (Portugal) on 2002-08-27 11:46 [#00367237]
Points: 6650 Status: Lurker | Followup to pOgO: #00367234



Toooooo racist or not, its offensive to some.


 

offline flim-flam from In a cupboard, in the kitchen. (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-27 12:14 [#00367255]
Points: 751 Status: Lurker | Followup to jonesy: #00367230



You trying to say that there are no Gay Indians?
And that there is no such thing as a brave?
All jokes are offensive, that's why we laugh at them....
I don't see what is racist about it? It's just a play on
words....

If it said all Indians are cock suckers....yes, it would be
racist....but it doesn't....and they're not!


 

offline uzim on 2002-08-27 12:26 [#00367267]
Points: 17716 Status: Lurker



11: Baseball is wrong... man with four balls cannot
walk.
18: Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
26: Sex is like bridge game... don't need a partner if you
have good hand.


lol ^^


 

offline Meho Krljic from Beograd (Yugoslavia) on 2002-08-27 12:30 [#00367268]
Points: 6617 Status: Addict



Anyway, what's wrong with being racist? it's just stating
the facts if you say that white race is obviously superior
to all others, right? No hard feelings about it.


 

offline B3n from Manchester (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-27 12:30 [#00367269]
Points: 4700 Status: Lurker



man who walk through airport turnstile sideways always going
to bangkok


 

offline B3n from Manchester (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-27 12:31 [#00367270]
Points: 4700 Status: Lurker | Followup to Meho Krljic: #00367268



wow meho, I love your plainspeak! ;)


 

offline Meho Krljic from Beograd (Yugoslavia) on 2002-08-27 12:35 [#00367273]
Points: 6617 Status: Addict



I knew I'd found a kindred spirit here.


 

offline korben dallas from nz on 2002-08-27 12:45 [#00367275]
Points: 4605 Status: Regular



No use hiding in hypocrisy !! :)



 

offline jonesy from Lisboa (Portugal) on 2002-08-27 12:47 [#00367276]
Points: 6650 Status: Lurker



I'm not adverse to a bit of racism myself; I hate the
English with a burning intensity, and the Welsh even more.


 

offline Meho Krljic from Beograd (Yugoslavia) on 2002-08-27 12:51 [#00367279]
Points: 6617 Status: Addict



Hmm, then I'm not racist because I hate everyone. Shit,
that's what Marilyn manson used to have on his T-shirts. I'm
really a sorry-arse copycat.


 

offline korben dallas from nz on 2002-08-27 12:56 [#00367281]
Points: 4605 Status: Regular



:) nice cop out! I can just picture the make up, the
contacts ..

whats the difference between hating people that hate people
or just hating people?

hate is a strong word tho innit? mmm


 

offline Isaac from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-27 12:57 [#00367282]
Points: 110 Status: Regular



Welsh people do tend to despise us English....
Perhaps because they see the validity in our argument that
Wales should be converted into a giant carpark?


 

offline flim-flam from In a cupboard, in the kitchen. (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-27 12:57 [#00367284]
Points: 751 Status: Lurker | Followup to Meho Krljic: #00367279



Gotta say though, love the pic.....what a babe!
But I always get a shiver of hatred when I hear the name
Marilyn manson....or is it Brian??
That guy is just so very, very sad!!!


 

offline tolstoyed from the ocean on 2002-08-27 12:58 [#00367287]
Points: 50073 Status: Moderator



i don't think ther's a difference

btw, i try not to hate-but it just doesn't work sometimes
'caus some ppl are really fuckin idiots


 

offline jonesy from Lisboa (Portugal) on 2002-08-27 12:58 [#00367288]
Points: 6650 Status: Lurker | Followup to Isaac: #00367282



What, like Milton Keynes or Essex? It could bring some
benefits I guess. As long as the Welsh were expelled.


 

offline flim-flam from In a cupboard, in the kitchen. (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-27 12:58 [#00367289]
Points: 751 Status: Lurker | Followup to Isaac: #00367282



Quite possibly!

Bu I am in quite a prediciment as I am English but am
currently living in Wales.....talk about sleeping with the
enemy!

But just to show how silly they can be....most of the people
here in swansea, think that I (who is from the south west)
sound Irish!
How mad is that!!??


 

offline Meho Krljic from Beograd (Yugoslavia) on 2002-08-27 13:00 [#00367291]
Points: 6617 Status: Addict



It is Brian Warner and Ihate his guts too.

Korben, whatare you on about? I just hate people, at least
90% of people I ever came in contact with should be erased
off the face of this planet. I wasn't trying to make a PC
statement there.


 

offline jonesy from Lisboa (Portugal) on 2002-08-27 13:01 [#00367297]
Points: 6650 Status: Lurker | Followup to flim-flam: #00367289



An Englishman living in Wales? You're the worst kind of
debased scum ANd you live in the arsehole of Wales.


 

offline Meho Krljic from Beograd (Yugoslavia) on 2002-08-27 13:02 [#00367298]
Points: 6617 Status: Addict



And when i say hate, it's not like I feel any real passion,
and it's not like I think these people are less valuable
then me, it's just that I feel I'd be far better off if they
never existed.


 

offline korben dallas from nz on 2002-08-27 13:05 [#00367300]
Points: 4605 Status: Regular



Meho: that's cool, wasn't meaning to insult you by making
you sound PC! - I guess prejudice and racism is getting a
little conflated here .. or something.

I'm too lazy to hate


 

offline Isaac from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-27 13:07 [#00367303]
Points: 110 Status: Regular



Don't knock flim-flam, jonesy....he could be our man behind
enemy lines, laying down his life for the cause. Advance our
carpark proposal at the next 'Sheep-Interaction Seminar' and
see how many yards you get before being skinned alive and
buggered.


 

offline Meho Krljic from Beograd (Yugoslavia) on 2002-08-27 13:08 [#00367306]
Points: 6617 Status: Addict | Followup to korben dallas: #00367300



No, it's OK, I know you well and I know that you didn't mean
anything bad, really. Besides, I haven't sent you those Cd's
yet and you have every right to insult me as much as you
feel like. I am too lazy to hate with passion too, which I
explained a few posts below.


 

offline jonesy from Lisboa (Portugal) on 2002-08-27 13:08 [#00367309]
Points: 6650 Status: Lurker | Followup to Isaac: #00367303



I don't wish to make alliances with Englishman Isaac, least
of all cockney welkes like yourself. I believe london should
be napalmed to oblivion.


 

offline Meho Krljic from Beograd (Yugoslavia) on 2002-08-27 13:09 [#00367310]
Points: 6617 Status: Addict



Sheep-interaction, as in sheep-shagging?


 

offline jonesy from Lisboa (Portugal) on 2002-08-27 13:12 [#00367313]
Points: 6650 Status: Lurker | Followup to Meho Krljic: #00367310



Sheep interaction is a more romantic word. Its like the
difference between fucking and making love.


 

offline korben dallas from nz on 2002-08-27 13:12 [#00367317]
Points: 4605 Status: Regular



Meho: :), as Friedrich would say - hatred is pettiness
(don't know if he actually said that). Take yer time with
them cd's .. :), you up for another shot of Gadamer?

Jonesy: could you be the charismatic leader the 'people'
have been waiting for ?? hehe..


 

offline jonesy from Lisboa (Portugal) on 2002-08-27 13:14 [#00367320]
Points: 6650 Status: Lurker | Followup to korben dallas: #00367317



Possibly Korben. I have an abiding contempt for the masses
and that is always a necessary quality.


 

offline Isaac from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-27 13:14 [#00367325]
Points: 110 Status: Regular



Jonesy - I'm confused, you're from Cardiff but hate Wales
and the Welsh almost as much as you hate England and the
English? From where do you reside and originate?


 

offline korben dallas from nz on 2002-08-27 13:15 [#00367326]
Points: 4605 Status: Regular



wait .. err .. um .. shouldn't you be on their side if you
were to lead the uprising?


 

offline korben dallas from nz on 2002-08-27 13:16 [#00367333]
Points: 4605 Status: Regular



Isaac: He's welsh! makes sense dunnit?


 

offline jonesy from Lisboa (Portugal) on 2002-08-27 13:20 [#00367341]
Points: 6650 Status: Lurker | Followup to Isaac: #00367325



i'm Welsh born but have resided in england for a few years.
Self-loathing that is extended to cover one's ethnic group
or nation is perfectly plausible no?


 

offline Isaac from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-27 13:20 [#00367342]
Points: 110 Status: Regular



I can appreciate the self-loathing complex that must come
with being Welsh, what with being piss-poor at all sport and
being continually covered in phlegm.


 

offline Meho Krljic from Beograd (Yugoslavia) on 2002-08-27 13:23 [#00367347]
Points: 6617 Status: Addict



I am a serb and I fucking hate serbs. I hate them even more
then others as I know serbs better, doesn't that make sense?


 

offline jonesy from Lisboa (Portugal) on 2002-08-27 13:26 [#00367353]
Points: 6650 Status: Lurker | Followup to Isaac: #00367342



To speak more accurately, I hate nationalism at all levels
and of all peoples (apart from countries who are occupied
e.g. Ireland or Palestine as this is linked to fighting
oppression). I hate flag-waving and national pride for the
contemptible enterprise that it is. I was living in
Nottingham at the time of the World Cup and felt
particularly nauseas at the sight of so many English flags.
how I wanted Argentina to win.


 

offline Isaac from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-27 13:31 [#00367370]
Points: 110 Status: Regular



jonesy - you may have something in common with an
Englishman, a cockney one at that!
I too wield a deep disliking of all things flag-bearing. Not
so much football, more the Royal family for I am a staunch
anti-Monarchist who believes that all living members should
be strung up at Traitors Gate for the crimes of their
for-fathers, washing their hands in the blood of the common
man.
Parasitic scum.


 

offline Meho Krljic from Beograd (Yugoslavia) on 2002-08-27 13:32 [#00367372]
Points: 6617 Status: Addict



I hate nationalism, too. I hate petriotism too. I hate all
kinds of collectivisms. That doesn't make me a hippy, of
course.


 

offline korben dallas from nz on 2002-08-27 13:32 [#00367374]
Points: 4605 Status: Regular



what's the point in supporting oppressed nationalism -> it's
either not going to make a difference, or its going to lead
to another nation(s) being oppressed ??


 

offline jonesy from Lisboa (Portugal) on 2002-08-27 13:42 [#00367393]
Points: 6650 Status: Lurker | Followup to korben dallas: #00367374



Not necessarily. While I would be loathe to form alliances
with elites in my own country, if I was living in an
occupied country the most effective means of fighting the
occupying force would be along national lines.


 

offline DaWeeze from WANTED IN 16 STATES! on 2002-08-27 19:10 [#00367765]
Points: 5213 Status: Addict



I come from a country that specializes in violence, both
domestically and abroad...

You guys don't know what you're talking about...

;.)


 

offline Smyrma from Beloit, WI (United States) on 2002-08-27 19:40 [#00367778]
Points: 2478 Status: Lurker



Fly who sits on toilet seat gets pissed off


 

offline Pirotess from Swansea (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-30 14:15 [#00372607]
Points: 571 Status: Lurker | Followup to jonesy: #00367297



Charming :p


 

offline Pirotess from Swansea (United Kingdom) on 2002-08-30 14:16 [#00372609]
Points: 571 Status: Lurker | Followup to flim-flam: #00367284



Humph :p


 


Messageboard index