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Battle of Witlessness
 

m....MwMw wwW(m M m)Www wMwM....m on 2001-07-23 07:20 [#00017216]



Let the battle commence...


 

Lt. Gerbal Malone from the Woodchip Cage on 2001-07-23 09:25 [#00017242]



Please let me sodomise you Jesus, I'll be real gentle and
wont sway to the sides.


 

fishbulb from fishbulb on 2001-07-23 09:26 [#00017243]



[cough]


 

fishbulb from fishbulb on 2001-07-23 09:27 [#00017244]



holy splatting winter turkey, batman!


 

chicken paste man!! on 2001-07-23 09:31 [#00017248]



hsdkbsiabsai ....ooooooooooooop!


 

fishbulb from fishbulb on 2001-07-23 09:34 [#00017251]



[fishbulb] why do i speak?

[dog-man] i don't know.

[fishbulb] when do i speak?

[cat-man] knod it now.

[fishbulb] how do i speak?

[dog-bulb] kind'o town.

[fishbulb] where do i speak?

[cat-bulb] dink no wot!

[fishbulb] drink fish bulb. the cola that is not a cola.


 

Alberto Refresho from Africa on 2001-07-23 09:49 [#00017262]



1. EXT. BEAUMONTS' FRONT LAWN - DAY

Blue skies. PAN SLOWLY DOWN to clean white picket fence,
with beautiful
red roses in front of it. Birds CHIRP in the distance. A
faint sprinkler
SOUND is heard. Very sweet MUSIC is playing.

DISSOLVE TO:

2. EXT. TREE - DAY

A songbird SINGS in the tree.

DISSOLVE TO:

3. EXT. CROSSWALK - SHADY STREET - DAY

A very clean uniformed, smiling POLICEMAN with arms
outstretched allows
clean happy SCHOOL CHILDREN to cross the street safely.

DISSOLVE TO:

4. EXT. SHADY STREET - DAY

A bright red gorgeous fire engine is moving very slowly down
the street.

We MOVE IN to see the happy face of a FIREMAN.

DISSOLVE TO:

5. EXT. FLOWER GARDEN - DAY

Yellow tulips sway in a warm afternoon breeze.

DISSOLVE TO:

6. EXT. BEAUMONTS' FRONT LAWN - DAY

The same white picket fence with roses in front of it.

PANNING SLOWLY now away from the roses down to the rich
green lawn
and over to the sprinkler which goes around and around
shooting water
droplets sparkling in the light.

This is slightly SLOW MOTION and DREAMY.

DISSOLVE TO:

7. EXT. BEAUMONTS' FRONT LAWN - DAY

CLOSER ON WATER DROPLETS. The water droplets are somewhat
abstracted
as they dance in the light.

PAN DOWN now to the green grass, traveling along the grass.


The MUSIC becomes fainter as we MOVE SUDDENLY under the
grass, now as
if in a dark forest.

SLOWLY MOVING THROUGH.

The grass is like great timbers.

It is GETTING DARKER and ominous SOUNDS come up as we
discover black
insects crawling and scratching in the darkness.

FADE TO:

8. EXT. BEAUMONT'S FRONT LAWN - DAY

MR. BEAUMONT is watering flowers and grass with the hose.

He is dressed in khaki trousers, canvas shoes, old white
shirt, straw
hat and dark glasses.

CLOSE - MR. BEAUMONT

watches his watering, then looks up.

The sky and the neighborhood are reflected in his dark
glasses. He
moves his false teeth around a little in his mouth, jutting
out his chin
in the process. He's thinking about who knows what.

He looks back down at his lawn.

CLOSEUP - WATER ON GRASS

The water hits the grass and mats it down.

WIDER - MR. BEAUMONT

moves the hose over a bush and gets a kink in it.

Water stops coming out of the nozzle and there is a LOUD
HISSING NOISE
of water under pressure.

CLOSEUP - KINK IN HOSE

Loud HISSING NOISE.

Mr. Beaumont goes around the bush and is undoing the kink
when he is
suddenly hit with a tremendous seizure.

CLOSEUP - MR. BEAUMONT
He's doubling over and falls to the ground. He continues to
grasp onto
the hose.

Water shoots crazily onto the driveway and his car.

Mr. Beaumont seems to be in tremendous pain.

CUT TO:

9. INT. BEAUMONTS' LIVING ROOM - DAY

Mrs. Beaumont is curled up on the couch, smoking a cigarette
and watching
T.V. It's a daytime soap.

CLOSEUP - MRS. BEAUMONT

Takes a big drag of her cigarette and luxuriously french
inhales a huge
quantity of blue smoke. She's enjoying her show.

CUT TO:

10. EXT. BEAUMONTS' FRONT LAWN - DAY

CLOSEUP - MR. BEAUMONT

His teeth are crooked in his mouth now as he tries to
scream.

No sound is coming out.

WATER SOUND is loud.

WIDER - MR. BEAUMONT

Water is still spraying out over the driveway and onto the
car and into
the yard beyond.

A small boy, GREGG, appears wearing only white underpants
and a white
t-shirt. He holds a large red popsicle.

Gregg waddles around looking at the crazy water show. He
holds his hand
out to get it wet in the spray. This makes him screw up his
face in a
laugh.

He waddles over and looks at Mr. Beaumont on the ground.

Mr. Beaumont seems to be worse now, unconscious, but still
gripping the
hose tightly. His clothes are sopping wet.

11. EXT. GREGG'S HOUSE - DAY

Screen window of Gregg's house. Gregg's mother calls out but
remains
looking at a bowl she is holding in her hands.

GREGG'S MOTHER
(calling out)
Gregg. Billy's waiting for his teddy.

She then turns to look out.

GREGG'S MOTHER
(continuing)
GREGG! Billy's waiting for his teddy, honey.

CUT TO:

12. EXT. BEAUMONTS' FRONT LAWN - DAY

GREGG'S MOTHER P.O.V. THROUGH SCREEN WINDOW

IN THE DISTANCE, she sees Gregg's back, a bush, some legs
with wet khaki
trousers and water squirting up in the air.

GREGG'S MOTHER (V.O.)
TOM!!!

CUT TO:

13. EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS BUILDING - NIGHT

TRAVELING along sidewalk, bushes, to lighted windows of an
auditorium.
MUSIC is heard.

14. INT. COLLEGE AUDITORIUM - NIGHT

A dance is going on. Sixties MUSIC plays, performed by a
live band on
stage. College kids dance.

A COLLEGE BOY enters the auditorium, urgently looking for
someone. He
quickly approaches a GIRL.

COLLEGE BOY
Louise? Where's Jeffrey? His mother's on
the phone - it's an emergency.

LOUISE
He disappeared to the men's room a little
while ago. I'm getting very tired of
waiting - let's go find him.

15. INT. JANITOR'S QUARTERS - COLLEGE - NIGHT

We MOVE INTO the face of JEFFREY. He is hiding behind a
furnace. He is
fascinated by a sight beyond in the darkness of this
basement room.

He sees a male student trying to rape his girlfriend. She
is crying and
telling him to stop but the boy keeps forcing her down
toward the ground.
forcing her clothes off her. Jeffrey at this point hears
his name being
called. Each time he hears his name the caller is closer.
The boy is now
hurting the girl. Before Jeffrey leaves the furnace room he
yells out:

JEFFREY
Hey, shit head. Leave her alone. Don't
force girls!

The couple looks up but cannot see Jeffrey. The boy is
scared and releases
the girl who promptly pulls farther away, crying.

Jeffrey leaves the furnace room.

16. INT. HALLWAY - COLLEGE - NIGHT

Louise and the college student see him and move quickly
toward him.

COLLEGE BOY
Jeffrey, your mother's on the phone. It's
an emergency.

LOUISE
Thanks for keeping me waiting so long.

As Jeffrey moves quickly toward the telephone.

JEFFREY
I'm sorry, Louise.

17. INT. PHONE/HALLWAY - COLLEGE - NIGHT

The phone dangles on its cord in the foreground as Jeffrey
moves toward
it in the background. Louise slowly follows Jeffrey, but
stays in back
of him. Jeffrey picks up the phone.

JEFFREY
Hello. Mom? What's wrong with Dad?.
What's happening?. Come home? Sure I will.

18. INT. BEAUMONT'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

Mrs. Beaumont sits talking on the phone in a dark quiet
bedroom.

MRS. BEAUMONT
I mean, for good, Jeffrey.

CUT TO:

19. INT. PHONE/HALLWAY - COLLEGE - NIGHT

CLOSEUP - JEFFREY

JEFFREY
For good?. I can't. Mom. Not right in
the middle of the term.

CUT TO:

20. INT. BEAUMONT'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

MRS. BEAUMONT
(now looks very tired and
poor health)
Jeffrey. honey. Your father's condition
is serious. It's going to cost so much.
We just won't have the money to keep you
in school. I'm telling you this now, so
that you can get your things together and
check out of school, honey, or whatever you
have to do. it'll save you another trip back.
You're going to have to work at the store.


CUT TO:

21. INT. PHONE/HALLWAY - COLLEGE - NIGHT

CLOSEUP - JEFFREY

JEFFREY
(crying)
Mom.

Louise looks at Jeffrey crying, then turns away. Jeffrey
hangs up the
phone.

CUT TO:

22. INT. BEAUMONT'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

Mrs. Beaumont hangs up her phone. just next to the phone
traveling into
a shadow is a winged termite.

FADE TO:

23. INT. GIRLS DORM LOBBY - COLLEGE - NIGHT

Jeffrey is waiting in a girls dorm lobby for Louise.

Girls are milling around. Louise gets off an elevator with
some other
girls. She forces a smile at Jeffrey as she comes toward
him.

JEFFREY
Can't you come to the damn airport?

LOUISE
Jeffrey. I can't. I really can't. I
have to go to that class tonight. I can't
get out of it. I really can't. I love
you, Jeffrey. I'll miss you.

JEFFREY
Alright. I'll call you in a couple of days,
you know. I'll let you know how things are.

LOUISE
Okay. I'll be here. You better git-going. I
gotta go too sweetie. I hope your father's
okay. I love you. I'm sorry, Jeffrey.

JEFFREY
I love you too, Louise. Damn it. I'll see you.

They kiss.

CUT TO:

24. EXT. LANDING STRIP

A PLANE TAKES OFF

DISSOLVE TO:

25. EXT. ANOTHER LANDING STRIP

A PLANE LANDS

26. EXT. AIRPORT - NIGHT

Jeffrey comes walking out of the airport, where his Mother
and AUNT
BARBARA, who is a very absent-minded little woman with very
thick glasses,
are waiting for him.

They are parked illegally and another car is honking at
them. Their
trunk is open in anticipation of Jeffrey's things. They are
waving and
yelling at Jeffrey to get his attention. He finally joins
them and kisses
his Mother, then his Aunt.

JEFFREY
Hi Mom. Hi Aunt Barbara.

They AD LIB hellos.

MRS. BEAUMONT
(a bit concerned)
Where's all your things, Jeffrey?

JEFFREY
This is it.

Mrs. Beaumont looks at Jeffrey.

JEFFREY
I sent a trunk home yesterday. This is
all I have.

AUNT BARBARA
You look good, Jeffrey. Did you have a nice
flight?

JEFFREY
Yeah. How's Dad?

MRS. BEAUMONT
He's alright. We'll tell you on the way home.

27. INT. BEAUMONT'S CAR - NIGHT

They get in the car. Aunt Barbara is driving. She is not a
good driver
and makes Jeffrey nervous. He watches her every move from
the back seat.

They drive on surface streets. Many gas stations, traffic
lights, bars.

MRS. BEAUMONT
He had a cerebral hemorrhage and they think
there's some sort of clot, or tumor, or
something in there. They're doing all sorts
of tests. On the surface, he looks pretty
good, but there are problems. They think he
may have to stay in two weeks now, at least.
You can go see him though tomorrow, Jeffrey.

AUNT BARBARA
They tore down the A & P, Jeffrey. Did you
see that?

JEFFREY
Aunt Barbara that was 5 years ago.

CUT TO:

28. EXT. BEAUMONTS' HOME - NIGHT

The car pulls into the Beaumonts' driveway. The neighborhood
is quiet and
dark.

CUT TO:

29. INT. BEAUMONTS' LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

Jeffrey, Aunt Barbara, and Mrs. Beaumont enter the living
room. Mrs.
Beaumont turns on a table lamp. A cold circle of light hits
the light
blue rug.

AUNT BARBARA
Home again, home again, jiggidy jog.

They look at Jeffrey. He looks at them.

CUT TO:

30. INT. JEFFREY'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

Jeffrey enters his small attic-type bedroom, turns on the
overhead light,
and sets his suitcase down. He goes to his desk and leans
across it to
look outside.

JEFFREY'S P.O.V. - EXT. STREET

The street is dark, except for a pool of light from a street
light.

CLOSEUP - JEFFREY

A breeze of cold powerful string MUSIC blows as we watch
Jeffrey stare into
space.

31. INT. BEAUMONTS' KITCHEN/HALLWAY - DAY

Mrs. Beaumont is calling upstairs to Jeffrey.

MRS. BEAUMONT
Jeffrey, breakfast is ready.

JEFFREY (V.O.)
(calling)
Be right down.

Mrs. Beaumont joins Aunt Barbara at the breakfast table in
the kitchen.

AUNT BARBARA
This is marvelous jam. Are you going this
morning?

MRS. BEAUMONT
I think Jeffrey would like to see his father
alone.

Jeffrey comes down the stairs. Everyone says their "good
mornings," and
Jeffrey sits down to breakfast.

JEFFREY
What time are visiting hours?

MRS. BEAUMONT
I've made arrangements with Dr. Gynde for
10:30. But Jeffrey, you'll have to walk
over; I need the car this morning.

JEFFREY
Well. Okay.

MRS. BEAUMONT
Jeffrey, when you see your father.

JEFFREY
Yeah?

MRS. BEAUMONT
He doesn't know you're out of school. He
thinks it's a vacation for you.

JEFFREY
What?

MRS. BEAUMONT
It would be too much for him. So please
let him think as he does, that you're
home just to see him.

JEFFREY
Thanks a lot, Mom.

MRS. BEAUMONT
.Jeffrey!. Nobody wanted you to leave
school and go to work in the store. maybe
going back to school will be an option one
day. I hope so.

AUNT BARBARA
I think it's important not to get depressed.
Depression is a terrible thing. They say it
can bring on illness.

JEFFREY
(angry)
Aunt Barbara. I'll try not to get depressed.

CUT TO:

33. INT. HALLWAY - HOSPITAL - DAY

Jeffrey follows a nurse to a hospital room.

NURSE CINDY
Please wait outside while Dr. Gynde prepares
him to see you.

JEFFREY
Prepares him?

She peers into the room. Jeffrey does too.

34. INT. HOSPITAL ROOM - DAY

All he can see are curtains surrounding a bed and stacks of
medical
machinery. Doctor Gynde comes out from behind the curtains
and walks to
Jeffrey.

DR. GYNDE
Hello Jeffrey.

JEFFREY
Hello, Doctor Gynde. How is he?

DR. GYNDE
He's fighting hard. Jeffrey. it's very
important that your father doesn't try
to move. he's been immobilized. It would
be very painful for him. sit close. you do
the talking and moving. He knows you're
here. He became very emotional. I don't
think he likes the idea of you seeing him
like this.

Nurse Cindy goes to the bed. She begins to pull the
curtains back
revealing Mr. Beaumont.

NURSE CINDY
(smiling a big smile)
Mr. Beaumont! Your son is here to visit you.

Then we see Mr. Beaumont. He has numerous tubes and needles
going into
different parts of him. A stainless steel device holds his
head perfectly
still. Nurse Cindy picks up a tray and leaves.

JEFFREY
(shocked but concealing it)
Hi Dad.

MR. BEAUMONT
(speaking as plainly as possible,
but sounds like mumbling)
Hey Jeff.

Jeffrey goes to him and puts out his hand to shake his
father's hand but
remembers his father cannot move. Jeffrey pats him on the
shoulder.

JEFFREY
Looks like they've got you strapped in
pretty good.

MR. BEAUMONT
(lips moving but hardly any sound)
uh uh.

JEFFREY
Are you feeling okay?

MR. BEAUMONT
(more mumbling)
uh uh.

Tears well up in Mr. Beaumont's eyes. Before Jeffrey can
stop him he
reaches for Jeffrey's hand, then struggling against
tremendous pain he
manages to form words.

MR. BEAUMONT
(more plainly but under strain)
Good to see you, son.

JEFFREY
(holding back tears)
It's good to see you, Dad.

Jeffrey squeezes his father's hand.

35. EXT. VACANT FIELD - DAY

Jeffrey is walking down a dirt road on his way home. He
kicks up little
clouds of dust as he walks. He has some time to think about
things. He
sees a green bottle in the distance. He gathers up a few
more rocks and
pitches them one by one at the bottle. He misses.

He looks for a few more good rocks to throw and while
looking through some
tall grass and weeds, he sees something strange.

He looks closer. It is a HUMAN EAR, covered with crawling
ants.

Jeffrey immediately stands up and looks around. All he sees
are houses
- some laundry drying - a very peaceful scene. No one seems
to be around -
No one seems to be watching him.

He looks again at the ear.

We are so close we can hear ants racing frantically around
the ear into it.
There is dried blood on part of it.

Jeffrey finds a brown paper bad and using a twig, he pushes
the ear onto
it. Again, he stands up and looks around.

IN THE DISTANCE, a MAN goes into the back door of a house.
Nothing more.

Jeffery hurries off, carrying the bag with the ear in it.

CUT TO:

36. EXT. POLICE DEPARTMENT - DAY

Jeffrey goes up the front steps...

37. INT. POLICE DEPARTMENT - DAY

... and to the Reception Desk. A POLICE OFFICER is standing
behind the
counter.

JEFFREY
Hello. could you tell me if Detective
Williams is still working here?

POLICE OFFICER
He's up in Room 221. Right up the stairs.

CUT TO:

38. INT. ROOM 221 - POLICE STATION - DAY

Jeffrey enters Room 221 and sees the desk marked, "DETECTIVE
J.D.
WILLIAMS," however, the desk is empty. TWO MEN are talking
at the end
of the room; one of them comes toward Jeffrey.

JEFFREY
Are you Detective Williams?

DETECTIVE WILLIAMS
Yes.

JEFFREY
My name is Jeffrey Beaumont - I live near
you. I believe you know my father, Tom
Beaumont - Beaumont's Hardware Store?

DETECTIVE WILLIAMS
Sure I do. I understand he's in the
hospital. How is he?

JEFFREY
He's alright, I guess. I hope. They're
doing tests, that's why I'm home from
school. I was over at the hospital this
morning and I was going home and in the
field behind our neighborhood. there
behind Vista, I found an ear.

DETECTIVE WILLIAMS
(matter of factly)
You did? A human ear?

JEFFREY
Yeah. I've got it here in this bag. I
thought I should bring it to you.

DETECTIVE WILLIAMS
Yep, that's right. Let's take a look at it.

Jeffrey opens the bag and lets Detective Williams look
inside.

DETECTIVE WILLIAMS
(continuing)
That sure looks like a human ear, doesn't
it?. Let's run it down to the Coroner's
Office and see what they make of it. Then,
I want you to show me exactly where you
found it.

CUT TO:

39. INT. CORONER'S OFFICE - DAY

Jeffrey, Detective Williams, and an OLD CORONER'S OFFICER
are looking at
the ear, which is sitting in a medical dish on a table.

CORONER'S OFFICER
The tests will take awhile. Meanwhile,
we'll check the morgue records. I don't
recall anything coming in minus an ear.

The Coroner's Officer turns to Jeffrey.

CORONER'S OFFICER
(continuing)
Now if you'd found a jaw or let's say, a
heart, or even an arm, we would assume
that there was a corpse, however, a finger
or an ear. the person may very well be
alive somewhere.

JEFFREY
What can you tell about the person from the
ear?

CORONER'S OFFICER
Well. when the tests are done, quite a lot
. Sex, blood type, whether or not the ear
came off a dead person. Right now, I know
what you know. It's a real human ear. The
human was, or is, Caucasian.
. also. It looks like the ear was cut off
with scissors.

40. EXT. VACANT FIELD - DAY

Jeffrey is out with Detective Williams and a CREW OF
OFFICERS who have
roped off the area and are doing a grid search.

A POLICE PHOTOGRAPHER is also there taking flash pictures
all around the
field, especially where Jeffrey has told them he found the
ear.

Detective Williams takes Jeffrey aside.

DETECTIVE WILLIAMS
By the way, Jeffrey, this story isn't going
to the press and I'm going to ask you to
consider all you've heard strictly
confidential. Do not discuss this business
with anyone, but me, or other police
personnel. Got it?

JEFFREY
Got it. Thanks for letting me in on as much
as you did.

DETECTIVE WILLIAMS
Come on. I'll drive you home. It's on my way.

CUT TO:

41. INT. BEAUMONTS' KITCHEN - NIGHT

Mrs. Beaumont and Aunt Barbara are doing the dishes. The
news is on a
small portable television. There is a broadcast on the
mounting crime
wave.

INSERT T.V. SCREEN

A series of murders are being discussed and a police drawing
mug shot is
shown on the screen of the suspect who is at large.

CUT TO:

42. INT. JEFFREY'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

Jeffrey is sitting at his desk daydreaming. He suddenly
picks up the
phone, hesitates, then dials.

JEFFREY
Hello?. LOUISE WERTHAM please. Louise?
. is she there?. Louise?
(very happy)
Yeah! How are you? He's okay. in the
hospital for tests.
(very serious)
I miss you so much.
(smiling now)
What have you been up to?. Louise, I don't
know. I've got to see how my father is
. It costs a fortune in that hospital.
When did he ask you to that?. Look. I
can't stop you. Go ahead. Just go ahead
. I may never be back, go. ahead. Look
Louise, stop trying to explain everything.
Just do it. let's talk again in a couple
of days or somethin', okay?. Yeah, I still
love you. Goodbye Louise. Goodbye.

Jeffrey sits alone in his room, thinking things over.

SLOW DISSOLVE TO:

43. INT. CORONER'S OFFICE - NIGHT

CLOSE UP - EAR IN MORTICIAN'S DISH

VERY SLOWLY, we MOVE very close to the ear, gliding slowly
around the
crevices approaching the dark hole. A huge, low rushing of
air SOUND,
THEN DARKNESS.

SLOW DISSOLVE TO:

44. INT. BEAUMONTS' LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

Low light. Jeffrey enters the room. Aunt Barbara and Mrs.
Beaumont are
watching television. Aunt Barbara is knitting.

JEFFREY
I'm going out for awhile.

MRS. BEAUMONT
(looks at her watch)
Do you want the car?

JEFFREY
No, I'm just gonna walk around.

MRS. BEAUMONT
Alright.

AUNT BARBARA
Jeffrey. you're not going down by Lincoln,
are you?

JEFFREY
(yelling back)
No. I'm just going to walk around the
neighborhood. Don't worry.

Aunt Barbara and Mrs. Beaumont continue watching the
television.

INSERT T.V. SCREEN

On T.V. we see a man's shoes. He is sneaking slowly up some
stairs.

CUT TO:

45. EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD STREET - NIGHT

Jeffrey walks along the dark streets. The same sombre MUSIC
plays low
and slow.

Some of the houses have a few lights on, some are dark.
Some windows have
a slow uneven blue flashing light, indicating the television
is on inside.

Jeffrey continues walking through the night. In the trees,
the shadows
continuously re-arrange themselves in mysterious, sometimes
frightening
patterns.

46. EXT. WILLIAMS HOME - NIGHT

Jeffrey finally comes to the house he's been looking for.

He goes up the front walk. Now, at the last minute, he
feels a little
foolish and has second thoughts about knocking on the door.

He looks in a window. Inside, he sees a nicely-lit living
room.
He goes ahead and knocks. A very pleasant-looking middle
class WOMAN
answers the door.

JEFFREY
Hello. uh. my name is Jeffrey
Beaumont. Is Detective Williams in?

MRS. WILLIAMS
Oh, yes, Jeffrey. Come in. He'll be back
any minute now. You're welcome to wait.
Is it urgent?

47. INT. WILLIAMS' LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

JEFFREY
I just wanted to ask him a few questions,
that's all. Maybe I better go.

MRS. WILLIAMS
Really, he'll be home soon, would you like
a cup of coffee?

JEFFREY
(thinks a bit)
Alright.

48. INT. WILLIAMS' KITCHEN - NIGHT

She leads him back to the kitchen where she has him sit at
the kitchen
table. She pours him a cup of coffee.

MRS. WILLIAMS
I was sorry to hear about your father. I
know your mother from church. It's such a
shame.

JEFFREY
Yeah, I know.

MRS. WILLIAMS
Would you like a piece of cake?

JEFFREY
No. No thank you.

MRS. WILLIAMS
It's a real good chocolate cake. Duncan
Hines' devil's food. real good.

JEFFREY
Yeah. okay.

49. INT. WILLIAMS' LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

Out in the living room, SANDY WILLIAMS and her BOYFRIEND,
MIKE SHAW,
come up from the basement. They are both carrying books.

Sandy is a very good looking, high school senior and Mike is
a big,
handsome football player type.

50. INT. WILLIAMS' KITCHEN - NIGHT

MRS. WILLIAMS
Sandy?.

Sandy and Mike come into the kitchen. Jeffrey has a big
piece of chocolate cake in his mouth.

MRS. WILLIAMS
(continuing)
Jeffery, this is my daughter, Sandy, and.
her boyfriend, Mike.

They all say "Hi" to one another.

SANDY
Mike's gotta go.
(to Jeffrey)
Nice to meet you.

MIKE
Yeah, nice meetin' yuh.

JEFFREY
Yeah. It was nice meeting you too.

They leave and go out the front door.

MRS. WILLIAMS
(smiles)
He comes over to study.

JEFFREY
(smiles big)
Yeah.

The front door opens.

DETECTIVE WILLIAMS (V.O.)
Pam?

MRS. WILLIAMS
In the kitchen, John!

Detective Williams comes into the kitchen surprised to see
Jeffrey.

DETECTIVE WILLIAMS
Oh. Hello, Jeffrey. what's up?

He kisses his wife.

DETECTIVE WILLIAMS
Come into the study a minute.

JEFFREY
(getting up)
Excuse me, Mrs. Williams.

MRS. WILLIAMS
Certainly.

Jeffrey follows Detective Williams into his study.

CUT TO:

51. INT. DETECTIVE WILLIAMS' STUDY - NIGHT

Detective Williams' study is filled with filing cabinets.
The desk has
two phones and is covered with papers and folders and a
picture of Mrs.
Williams and Sandy. The police radio is asking for
Detective Williams as
they enter.

DETECTIVE WILLIAMS
(to Jeffrey)
Shut the door.

Detective Williams speaks through the radio while Jeffrey
shuts the door.

DETECTIVE WILLIAMS
(continuing; in radio)
Detective Williams here. yeah. Tell him
to go to Sergeant Milton. yeah, copy.
(clicks off radio, turns to Jeffrey)
Well, Jeffrey, you found something which is
very interesting to us. Very interesting.
I know you must be curious to know more.
(scratches the middle of his back)
But. I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask
you not only not to tell anyone about your
find, but also not to ask more about the
case. One day. when it's all sewed up, I'll
let you know all the details. Right now,
though. I can't.

JEFFREY


 

Baron Von Picklefoot from The keep me under the stairs with only a canned ham to keep me company on 2001-07-23 10:56 [#00017271]



Yeah Il liked that movie "Blue Velvet " too I thought Dennis
Hopper was great in it you should of kept going till he
entered !


 

Randalf the Gandalf Felcher from UK on 2001-07-23 12:49 [#00017305]



Sometimes I worry about the mundanity of this board compared
to another......seem's like you take away the Aphex Twin tag
and you'd be left with a bunch of cabbageheads who would
feel more at home at a Lynrd Skynrd net meeting......just my
opinion.....so flame me as I know you will....


 

cabbage head on 2001-07-23 18:37 [#00017398]



i KIn cut Uff mi LIPS wifth Hedge a ma clippees! *clip clip
clip*

Woof!

Woof!
Woof!

DDUUUUAHHHHHAhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can counth to eleven!1,2,3,6,7,9,13,107,1,056,483, 10!

No!
No raisiNs for you!


 

m....MwMw wwW(m M m)Www wMwM....m on 2001-07-24 08:20 [#00017508]



Given:
cheese=4
yummy=x

Prove that 4=x

I'm gonna marry Zelda! Back off Mutoid Man... *shwink shink
chink* You like that, huh, I have it, you don't. It's called
Meerio Twins. They're so much... the same PERSON- I say to
them "You want ice cream cone?" BOTH of them say yes.

WTF?
*deet deet deet
da da deet... doop.
di di di da dip da dip
dope dope da dip da da
dip da da
dip da*
"CLINGON" "CLINGON" "WHEW" "CLINGON"


 

Tek from Australia on 2001-07-24 09:58 [#00017535]



hahaha

if you don't get that go here
http://w1.871.telia.com/~u87119813/mario.swf


 

Baron Von Picklefoot from The keep me under the stairs with only a canned ham to keep me company on 2001-07-24 11:22 [#00017568]



I keep my feet in a box under lock and key in my basement so
that nobody steals them when I'm sleeping! Oh NO you people
know too much already! You bunch of feet thieving
bastards!!!!

The Baron has spoken!!!! P.S. If ever find out who painted
my head blue I will buy you a sandwich! STAY THE FUCK
OFF MY LAWN OR MY KILLER GOAT WILL TAKE YOUR WALLET!!!!!!!


 

m....MwMw wwW(m M m)Www wMwM....m on 2001-07-25 09:45 [#00017760]



I can fit a whole caterpr illa in my nose... I shaved my
eyebrows- for captain Steve.

...I put some salt inmy mouth and put a slug in there. It
felt yukky. Whatd you do today captain Steve?


 

offline titsworth from Washington, DC (United States) on 2003-07-28 10:40 [#00796868]
Points: 14550 Status: Lurker



you must be another handsome boy graduate.


 

offline corticalstim from Canada on 2003-07-28 10:45 [#00796877]
Points: 3885 Status: Regular



what. the. fuck.


 

offline titsworth from Washington, DC (United States) on 2003-07-28 10:50 [#00796886]
Points: 14550 Status: Lurker | Followup to corticalstim: #00796877



discipline makes things easier, organize your life.


 

offline recycle from Where is Phobiazero (Lincoln) (United States) on 2003-07-28 10:59 [#00796911]
Points: 40066 Status: Lurker | Followup to titsworth: #00796886



word up brotha Travis


 

offline virginpusher from County Clare on 2003-07-28 11:02 [#00796920]
Points: 27325 Status: Lurker



This thread rocks!!!


 


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