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new freestyle thread

offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2024-01-29 14:05 [#02632191]
Points: 6286 Status: Lurker

one where i'm not psychotic and/or wasted. go!


it's widely and commonly known
my rhymes are hydroponically grown
the end is nigh, fuck yr seratonin supply
i'm doper meaning fly, neurotransmitter lullaby
others spitters start to stumble and cry
i turn astrolite into astroglide
cos i'm sicker than a chinese virus
spittin mucus at the useless and saliva at the spineless
fartknocker, i bring the art proper
yr best shit's beta like a blocker
my stick figure's feelin supercool, truly
i'm drinkin a liquid helium smoothie
needin beats that're chunky like stay puft
and please don't hit me up on facebook
heads, shoulders, knees and toes
you can't compete with one of these flows
fuck ya parrot rap, i'll smack you out ya maga cap
bringin fire like a gas tap, armed like octopus
crept from a sarcophagus, blood thicker than treacle
feelin my heart coughin dust n particles of evil
me of all people, as a pacifist
it hurts me to hurt you but i'm teachin ya what rappin is
i swing a padlock in a sock
stoned like scissors, blunted on the rock
flippin you the bird cos i'm flyer than the whole flock
crazy like a fox, more cuckoo than yr grandfather's clock
heavy on the flac or the vinyl
i bring the tension like a black ball final
somebody slit my corpus collosum open
i think in two minds, yr hopin that i'm jokin
say i'll stripe you with a ladyshave razor
the charming stranger, quark to a quasar
my focus is a misaligned laser
mr misanthropic but hot like hot topic
yr shit's a con like panoptic
bitch i think it's time that yr gettin the dropkick


offline Roger Wilco from Mo's Beans on 2024-01-29 16:54 [#02632192]
Points: 1896 Status: Regular

I'm a racist!
There ain't no other way I be saying this.
It's unequivocal.
Don't step outside your mosque
when I'm in control of a vehicle.

Refugees, NGOs,
you all know where y'all can go.
I'm intolerant, non-compliant,
my blood pressure's a miracle of science.

On X, formerly Twitter,
I be like Sam Hyde but fitter
I deconstruct your thesis on the shitter
I am white, low-income, tight and embittered.

Gender! Don't test me.
I know the difference between a bird and a bender.
Sure, claim to be a woman when you're up in court,
but maybe leave out muscling in on girls'sports


offline Tony Danza from Sesame Street on 2024-01-29 17:13 [#02632193]
Points: 3564 Status: Regular | Followup to Roger Wilco: #02632192

I don't suppose the other Racists have had a word with you
about (((who))) is flooding your country with brown folks,
making the frogs gay, the girls nonbinary, and the movies

You seemed more interested in that before you were
sleeping with the enemy.


offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2024-01-29 19:49 [#02632195]
Points: 6286 Status: Lurker

i'm sicker than mortality rates
on phone speaker with next to no bass
or soundsystem bringin plaster down
ask around, i got that power to astound
class clown, where's he from, what's he up to?
believe me this aint a run through
i'll run up and mug yr mum before i mug you off
with the phlegm in my cough
imaginary skeng in my waistband, execute wasteman
send you to the wasteland, t.s. eliot
where's that weed? cos i think i'm smellin it
anybody know who's sellin it?
must be psychosomatic, i'm so erratic
mind full of benzos and static
all ya little fish in big ponds can bite me
cash the bong and pass it on politely
say parrumpa-pum-pum to yr brain pan
little funky drummer boy hijacked yr brain scan
aren't we gettin disrespectful?
"wait is he shittin me? got to be a leg pull"
one corona two corona three corona, loads
fully fuck yr fake funerary flows


offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2024-01-29 20:26 [#02632196]
Points: 6286 Status: Lurker

shoppin at waitrose or poppin the H, bros?
unclear diction, rescript my benzos
going back to bed for a quick doze
six hours later i still got the sick flows
the spins kicked in, yeah i get those
kicked the bucket and sampled it for a kick drum
now what happens? i'm a bit dumb
something something blah blah fuck yr bitch mum
i'm inappropriate, i told ya
desecrating the grave of the unknown soldier
this shit's largely over
i'm maserati, you're a broken skoda
put down the chalice, hold onto yr ballast
lysergic rabbithole, i travel after alice
hit you at the deeley plaza in dallas
believe me, galaxies dangle in the balance
this fruit juice is too sugary, i'm fucked up to buggery
bubbles in my vein and lungs full of pleurisy
crypto AG made my security
this sorcerer's apprentice sensed neural perjury
they wanna talk, i want em in the morgue
poppin eyes out with a plastic fork
limpin as i walk, still jumpy in withdrawal
nooses give, guns aren't lawful
unclicked the hyperlinks, face like the sphinx
now i'm off to catch another 400 winks


offline Roger Wilco from Mo's Beans on 2024-01-29 21:06 [#02632197]
Points: 1896 Status: Regular | Followup to Tony Danza: #02632193

I know me going out with a Jew upsets you, and to be honest
I only do it in order to wind you and Big up.


offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2024-01-29 21:18 [#02632198]
Points: 6286 Status: Lurker

y'all tossers can't seem to reach the colossus
come on my hippety hoppers
get walking like a zombie on the ket
hail fellow well met, and yet, and yet
genuine offensive like the tet
scummy skullfucker, yr mum wants it up her
buttplugger, i'll plug ya with a blunderbuss
i'm higher than all of the himalayas stacked up under us
i overdose and pause to smell the roses
belb causes megaton explosives, best know this
i'm seein via gaslight, zilty geeks hang tight
all gettin lachrymose wankin into pantyhose
i'm snackin on some eggy toast
and that's frankly how it goes
if it'll come to blows i'm half porcupine
marking the waterline underneath yr nostril
dippin into hog swill
you overestimate my goodwill
i suddenly got a curious notion
feel like obelix crawlin out the cauldron of potion
so when you reach the secret lair
i'll fix you with a steely stare, leave you in a wheelchair
anythin waist down? wasteman will no longer feel there
oh and that isn't even yr real hair


offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2024-01-29 21:45 [#02632199]
Points: 6286 Status: Lurker

let's get degraded
only chased the dragon so i can say that i slayed it
yr shit is weaksauce, hp lovecraft
nurse? i'm ready for a sponge bath
it's the wanker from lubyanka calling smersh
cursin as i drive a pink hearse in reverse
i'm the worst and there's a few to choose from
find a bible you can shoot yr splooge on
why signal virtue? let's get ripped like rizla
think i won't hurt you? yr a turkey like twizzler
hate in all forms must hit it's target
i'm still gettin bombed like carpet
crusty loop digger on a mish
who's got the pellets, who's on the switch?
who's still wishin boris was dead in a ditch?
i tapped the cable at bude now yr screwed
GCHQ'd, got yr picture in the nude
snorted til i saw aborted babies causing symptoms of rabies
in young ladies' labias, what's the plague's kill radius
stay with us and take a quick breath, this is gigadeath
and we're nowhere near finished yet


offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2024-01-29 21:59 [#02632200]
Points: 6286 Status: Lurker

bored of reefer, got my lean in a beaker
proceed to put my feet through the speaker
i'm schizo n skint but appealing, dancing on the ceiling
once more with feeling, it's not samplin, i'm stealin
if e is mc cubed i'm yr dude
drank my benefits, pennies left for food
so quel surprise if i'm crawlin on my knees
no surprise, i'm not feeling nice guys
codeine got me itching like the fleas
eyes diseased, red like laboratory mice
now eating half peas n half rice
with vegan beef n smoked gouda, sold my computer
stole 4 frames from abraham zapruder
empires are falling off like hans gruber
got sarin comin under yr draft excluder
VX next unless ya cut me a cheque
like the wu said, best protect ya neck
i'm only awake cos i haven't yet slept
watchin shadows creep til they've crept
bad dancer with a double dose of cancer
heard a murmur as i pushed the art further
private numbers? they never get an answer
blood curdles as i plan my own murder
behead the bosses, nail em to crosses
gosh, it's the poshes v ghillies and galoshes
sick stoners break bones with heavy coshes
yr shit won't stick but we'll make sure it backwashes
and fuck yr rap schemes, i'll hit you with cat memes
u can't haz cheezburger, know what that means?
i'm lightning in a bottle, full throttle
munchin jam butty and drinkin frobscottle
oversharing's broke my ball bearings
jog on ya damn dutty snot gobble, i'm so uncarings


offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2024-01-29 22:30 [#02632201]
Points: 6286 Status: Lurker

i'm free range, the baby in the manger then
i get shitfaced, crash a plane with a laser pen
know i'm sick but i keep washin my hands man
black hoodie up like an inverse klansman
pacifist but yr in all kinds of trouble
my tongue is the acidest, the path is this
talk set to double, bong set to bubble
hella clones murmur murder into megaphones
me? mephistopheles
so gimme proper green and a system to be rockin please
abort the birth of earth in the sunrays
i've done worse, usually in dumb ways
long pause then it's all so tasty
let you get yr breath back, maybe you can racebait me
i'll flick you off like a rogue bogey
it's not even like you know me
i'm yr alpha if yr into alphabetizing
but how about some poetry not dicksizing
wanna give that dick a pull?
cos bitch yr a little dull
when i'm analytical it's the sickest of mission critical
madman monday, injected every tuesday times four
bad lad to mess with, truesay times more
the truth hurts, nature of the truth eh, eh oh, aww
tubby custard up yr noo noos
yallses doesn't cut the mustard, sorry froo froos
say b to the elbow drop
got to make the lyrical leng go pop
but leng man down? man look around
yr shit's ten a penny, it's all round town yr a clown
can't step to me, can't go up against belbulon
what was that and what the hell you on?
it's b to the e to the l to the b again
crack a brewski and guzzle like a pelican
curses on yr residence, i'm shiva with a cleaver
eloquence to delete a nonbeliever
i trained my brain while i was steaming like a cleaner
shit, now i can't remember my real name either


offline Tony Danza from Sesame Street on 2024-01-29 22:47 [#02632202]
Points: 3564 Status: Regular | Followup to Roger Wilco: #02632197


...I mean, there's living rent free in your head, and then
there's this, where you also give me a fully stocked wet bar
and a daily massage with a happy ending.



offline Tony Danza from Sesame Street on 2024-01-29 22:48 [#02632203]
Points: 3564 Status: Regular

belb I'm sorry, your album now has comedy sketches between


offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2024-01-29 22:56 [#02632204]
Points: 6286 Status: Lurker | Followup to Tony Danza: #02632203

nah it's good any good hip hop album has its skits

who is my hype man, what what


offline recycle from Where is Phobiazero (Lincoln) (United States) on 2024-01-30 15:55 [#02632210]
Points: 39582 Status: Regular

I typed some stuff into Snap chat AI and it gave me some
dribble lol


offline belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2024-02-22 00:03 [#02632781]
Points: 6286 Status: Lurker

pardon? oh they're buried in the back garden
daughter molesterin, left a corpse festerin
go getter now detained at her majesty's pleasure
took the queen's gambit, smokey is the bandit
time to burn and evadcuate yr brainpan
quicklime for murderin mates and every main man
nonchalant? try minus one chalant, honestly
responsibly bombed is my policy
precog precursors, leavin earth is the worst
if bliss turns to guilt
accursed mother's milk
from the teat we eat the cheese and the meat
startin over from carcinoma
mental to the limit
caulfield holdin it together like a rivet
what's life? i forgot to live it
take aim, sarkier than daria and jane
who's to blame, i maintain composure
loaded on the doja
hydro grown and hydrocodone
bowl packed, i act unbalanced
suck my phallus
no malice just a hq addict
dot wav dot flac dot m4a
smoke all day on disability pay
soundrec dot exe, i can like mexi
mr mushycaps is not mr moneybags
but see who be gunnin that pedal to the metal
first i divert you straight to my honeytrap
temple ball now i'm ten feet tall
fuck y'all off the wall
i'm like humpty comin outta my shell
aint any numpty gonna rap so well
oh and much love to cafe oto
if you didn't now you do know
gimme that new flow
still numero uno, where'd my cleanup crew go?


offline mermaidman on 2024-02-22 10:12 [#02632784]
Points: 8173 Status: Regular

one two one two
i'm a jew now just cause i wore a kippah
did i read the torah? bro i'm not even circumcised
i'm dating a jewish "bird" so now all israelis are my


offline mermaidman on 2024-02-22 10:31 [#02632785]
Points: 8173 Status: Regular

oh btw i don’t like africans but i listen to drexciya


offline mermaidman on 2024-02-22 10:57 [#02632786]
Points: 8173 Status: Regular

did you see how i rhymed them all?
immigration has taken its toll


offline mermaidman on 2024-02-22 14:12 [#02632788]
Points: 8173 Status: Regular

all homo eyes on me
i'm not going to give away my anal virginity


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