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Bum Exchange™

offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2022-04-18 18:24 [#02618149]
Points: 30221 Status: Addict

Welcome to the Bum Exchange™, we deal with any derrière,
smooth, round, shrivelled, flat, clean & smelly.

Trade in your old bum today, get 15% off your next purchase
or a free ringpiece worth £2.50. We also accept semi used
loo rolls as down payments for cervices and reconditioned
arse cheeks. So pop round to your local Bum Exchange™
today, you won't regret it!

Once fitted and used, Bums are not refundable, we are not
responsible for any fecal leakage or discolouration of your
anus, all rights reserved, Bum Exchange™


offline umbroman3 from United Kingdom on 2022-04-18 19:12 [#02618150]
Points: 5626 Status: Lurker

Sustainable and vegan?


offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2022-04-18 20:06 [#02618151]
Points: 30221 Status: Addict | Followup to umbroman3: #02618150

Yes Leonardo Dicaprio has had a new ECO-ARSE3000™ fitted
and is testing it rigorously on the artic tundra and Amazon
Rainforest, its completely biodegradable and carbon-neutral,
all methane is captured in a carbon impregnate sphincter.


offline recycle from Where is Phobiazero (Lincoln) (United States) on 2022-04-19 02:21 [#02618152]
Points: 38244 Status: Addict



offline ijonspeches from 109P/Swift-Tuttle on 2022-04-20 07:52 [#02618164]
Points: 6613 Status: Regular | Show recordbag



online belb from mmmmmmhhhhzzzz!!! on 2022-04-20 08:40 [#02618165]
Points: 5834 Status: Lurker

what's yr policy on tattooos? the arse cheek i'm looking to
exchange has a large portrait of krishnan guru-murthy on it.
it's quality work and i'll be sorry to see it go, but i have
to abide by the court order - if i can't give the full moon
with guru-murthy's cheeky grin i don't see the point


offline Roger Wilco from Mo's Beans on 2022-04-20 08:49 [#02618166]
Points: 1412 Status: Regular

I will exchange my Bum with anyone, just so I can look at it


offline mermaidman on 2022-04-20 10:34 [#02618167]
Points: 7225 Status: Regular | Followup to Roger Wilco: #02618166

are you open to doing more than just looking at it?


offline RussellDust on 2022-04-20 17:16 [#02618168]
Points: 15349 Status: Addict

My bum is currently useless.


offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2022-04-20 19:22 [#02618169]
Points: 30221 Status: Addict | Followup to RussellDust: #02618168

Come on down to the bum exchange™ , we have all shapes and
sizes to suit your unique posterior requirements. Our
expertFundament technicians™ will take detailed
LIDAR measurements of your rump from a complete 180 degree
rotation. Then they will upload your rear-end to our
patented 4D Arsemosaic™ application, where out
techies will work with you to design your dream arse from a
wide selection of changeable parameters. Want buttocks
shaped like two firm Melons and a ring piece like balloons
nozzle, and the click of a few simple mouse buttons your
fantasy buttocks™ will be rendered in glorious 3D.

From this stage we invite you to put on our custom 4D
arse boggles when you can palpate and manipulate your
arse in
real-time. Once satisfied our "bottom
blueprint" matches all of your custom specifications, your
arse will be then sent across the world via our arsemail™
protocol where artisan "bum sculptors" in Taipei Taiwan
will get to work immediately to craft the ultimate buttocks
of your imagination.


offline Hyperflake from Wirral (United Kingdom) on 2022-04-20 19:29 [#02618170]
Points: 30221 Status: Addict | Followup to belb: #02618165

I think we can work out a exclusive bum exchange contract
with you, in fact we would love to have your krishnan
guru-murthy decorated rump displayed in our flagship
Doncaster store, where it will take pride of place next to
Fred Dibnah's cast iron industrial revolution era arse


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