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REAL SCIENCE AS SEEN BY STUDENTS
 

offline Aktium from cleveland (United States) on 2002-03-31 06:08 [#00151604]
Points: 1128 Status: Lurker



This is a list of comments from test papers, essays,
etc., submitted to science and health teachers by
elementary,
junior high, high school, and college students: "It
is truly astonishing what weird science our young scholars
can create under the pressures of time and grades."
The spellings are the original ones. (Transmitted by
Professor Pill-Soon Song, a KASTN editor, from a chemistry
net group called SAFETY@uvmvm.uvm.edu, dated 1/13/96)

1. H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water.

2. To collect fumes of sulphur, hold a deacon over
a flame in a test tube.

3. When you smell an oderless gas, it is probably carbon
monoxide.

4. Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin.
Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is water and gin.

5. A super saturated solution is one that holds more
than it can hold.

6. Liter: A nest of young puppies.

7. Magnet: Something you find crawling all over a dead
cat.

8. Momentum: What you give a person when they are going
away.

9. Vacuum: A large, empty space where the pope lives.

10. Artificial insemination is when the farmer does
it to the cow instead of the bull.

11. The pistol of the flower is its only protection
against insects.

12. A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is,
the more extinct it is.

13. To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over
the nose.

14. For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower that the
heart until the heart stops.

15. For head colds: use an agonizer to spray the nose
until it drops in your throat.

16. Germinate: To become a naturalized German.

17. The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon.
All water tends towards the moon, because there is no
water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget
where the sun joins in this fight.

18. Blood flows down one leg and up the other.



 

offline aneurySm from Ypsilanti (United States) on 2002-03-31 06:09 [#00151607]
Points: 1699 Status: Lurker



i dare say
'genius'


 

offline w M w from London (United Kingdom) on 2002-03-31 06:10 [#00151609]
Points: 21423 Status: Regular



I don't get ti, they all seem true to meem


 

offline Salma Hayek on 2002-03-31 06:12 [#00151610]
Points: 1056 Status: Regular



students kick ass...


 

offline xlr from Boston (United States) on 2002-03-31 06:31 [#00151633]
Points: 4904 Status: Regular



i weep for the future.


 

offline aneurySm from Ypsilanti (United States) on 2002-03-31 06:49 [#00151642]
Points: 1699 Status: Lurker



"there is no future
it doesn;t exist
take some mushrooms and squeegy your third fucking eye!"
-Bill Hicks


 

offline xlr from Boston (United States) on 2002-03-31 07:15 [#00151656]
Points: 4904 Status: Regular



hey anuery, did you make that pic yourself? it looks like a
comination of a toy soldier, anna kournikova, and one of the
come to daddy children. it's cool!


 

offline Aktium from cleveland (United States) on 2002-03-31 21:14 [#00152319]
Points: 1128 Status: Lurker



The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon.
All water tends towards the moon, because there is no
water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget
where the sun joins in this fight.

thats right


 

offline B3n from Manchester (United Kingdom) on 2002-03-31 21:19 [#00152327]
Points: 4700 Status: Lurker



a few years ago in class out teach used to get us to make
the 2nd years test papers and some of the answers they gave
were hilarious! and you could just tell who the boffins
were, so we were really tight with the marks and makred them
down and marked up the shit ones 'guesstimating' their
score.

haha, happy days..


 

offline B3n from Manchester (United Kingdom) on 2002-03-31 21:19 [#00152328]
Points: 4700 Status: Lurker



^' few years ago in class our teach used to get us to mark'




 

offline TrevorGod from Toronto (Canada) on 2002-03-31 21:23 [#00152330]
Points: 894 Status: Regular



13, 14 and 15 sound painful.


 


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