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cliques and why the suck
 

offline anon from ^_^ (United Kingdom) on 2002-09-04 17:03 [#00378630]
Points: 1828 Status: Lurker



jthm thats a pretty childish view, saying stuff like 'all
cheerleaders should be shot'' i knwo im fourteen and
whatever ( so i shudnt be saying this) but still , thats
very narrow minded.your slagging them off for following a
crowd and all that when maybe if thats what makes them happy
you should leave them alone.And by being a
'loner/freak/whatever your still following somthing..just
not in a crowd. do you get me?
please take no offence in what ive said
thanks
Anon


 

offline Ceri JC from Jefferson City (United States) on 2002-09-04 17:07 [#00378636]
Points: 23533 Status: Moderator | Followup to anon: #00378630 | Show recordbag



I think it was a joke, I think he was saying that he
dislikes the stereotypical cheerleader archetype.

That said, choosing to be a freak (slipknot/marilyn manson
hoodie wearers take note) is often more cliquey as they tend
to be persecuted to a degree and as such stick together.


 

offline TonyFish from the realm of our dreams on 2002-09-04 17:09 [#00378639]
Points: 3349 Status: Lurker



I hate the way people who wear black automatically get
labelled as 'goths'. Goths go in for chains and leather
jeans and stuff.


 

offline Ceri JC from Jefferson City (United States) on 2002-09-04 17:14 [#00378645]
Points: 23533 Status: Moderator | Followup to TonyFish: #00378639 | Show recordbag



I know, wearing black just means you're a criminal ;)

I used to wear almost exclusively black, but you're right,
people seem to label you as a goth for all sorts of
reasons...


 

offline xlr from Boston (United States) on 2002-09-04 17:21 [#00378652]
Points: 4904 Status: Regular



Cliques suck but unfortunetely it's the way of the world.

Even here at college there are cliques. I thought they'd
grow out of them after high school but apparentely not.



 

offline smokehammer from Saigon (Vietnam) on 2002-09-04 17:29 [#00378661]
Points: 1463 Status: Lurker



everyone must find their own path sooner or later.

If you don't use other people as crutches to indulge &
re-inforce your shared facade ; all credit to you , its a
good start.


 

offline jthm from in my garage (United States) on 2002-09-04 18:25 [#00378718]
Points: 248 Status: Regular



im quite bored


 

offline jthm from in my garage (United States) on 2002-09-04 18:27 [#00378720]
Points: 248 Status: Regular



ive said all i needed to say



 

offline TonyFish from the realm of our dreams on 2002-09-04 18:28 [#00378722]
Points: 3349 Status: Lurker



read a book
play a video game
research a random topic online
discover a new musician
write a document about the ideal implementation of the
singleton design pattern
sit down and listen to everything you have by a particular
artist....


 

offline titsworth from Washington, DC (United States) on 2002-09-04 18:28 [#00378724]
Points: 14550 Status: Lurker



most people just hate cliques cos they're not in one
themselves. not all cliques are bad; some groups of people
are really nice and friendly.

that said, most are extremely elitist and smug, delighting
in the fact that you're not cool enough to be in their
circle.


 

offline titsworth from Washington, DC (United States) on 2002-09-04 18:33 [#00378749]
Points: 14550 Status: Lurker



"if you're not a very confident person, it sometimes helps
to
fit in, especially in school. It does suk, but if it'll save

you alot of grief sometimes it's worth it"
pOgO is 100% right. i have a very level head, i wish i had
done that because i know i could've kept my sense of
individuality while making those minor compromises. i was
too stubborn to do that though, which has led me to so much
more grief than anyone deserves (not that it's any more than
the rest of you; i'm saying i know where you are coming
from). after finding some social acceptance (which, whether
you're willing to admit it or not, everyone needs to a
certain degree - whether it's a few people or everyone you
know) you could then branch out again in a healthy
environment, and that would make your other friends feel
comfortable enough to express themselves as well.


 

offline titsworth from Washington, DC (United States) on 2002-09-04 18:37 [#00378760]
Points: 14550 Status: Lurker



you know what's funny? reading this thread made me realize
that a lot of you hate people that are different from you
because they hate you for being different. real mature guys.
(truth be told, i used to feel the same way though.)


 

offline titsworth from Washington, DC (United States) on 2002-09-04 18:40 [#00378766]
Points: 14550 Status: Lurker



it also makes me see how contrived this whole "i'm a
loner/outcast" act is. some of you (but not all) revel in
it, rolling around in it like a filthy pig. how's that
different from getting off on being popular and admired?
well, both are unhealthy but at least the trendy kids are
happy (deluded or not).


 

offline TonyFish from the realm of our dreams on 2002-09-04 18:42 [#00378771]
Points: 3349 Status: Lurker



I only loathe those who are aggressive towards me. I'm a
very passive person. What do I care how they dress etc..
it's entirely up to them and if they are happy then thats
cool.


 

offline TonyFish from the realm of our dreams on 2002-09-04 18:43 [#00378774]
Points: 3349 Status: Lurker | Followup to titsworth: #00378766



yes i agree


 

offline titsworth from Washington, DC (United States) on 2002-09-04 18:45 [#00378782]
Points: 14550 Status: Lurker | Followup to TonyFish: #00378771



how are people aggressive towards you? i don't know how old
you are, but in college i haven't experienced any taunting
or attacking - i'm just ignored completely and sometimes
gossiped about behind my back. (that was last year; i don't
think i've done anything in the last 4 days to warrant
gossiping, and really it was only a certain clique last year
who said anything about me, though, again, never to my
face.)


 

offline TonyFish from the realm of our dreams on 2002-09-04 19:04 [#00378835]
Points: 3349 Status: Lurker



I experienced I fair amount of racism at the age of 14-16 in
london. Ok so that was a long time ago but it's not like
things have improved any. And get this - the racism was
directed at me because i lived in france for 5 years
previously, not because of my nationality - I'm english !!
It made for a nasty atmosphere, not the kind of feeling
you'd like to have in a place you'd like to call 'home'.


 

offline titsworth from Washington, DC (United States) on 2002-09-04 19:15 [#00378866]
Points: 14550 Status: Lurker | Followup to TonyFish: #00378835



yea i imagine it'd be hard to deal with that.


 

offline AMinal from Toronto (Canada) on 2002-10-09 17:38 [#00398247]
Points: 3476 Status: Regular



yeah i think i pretty much agree with all you guys..

i think about 95% of what people think are groups of
"friends" are really just 'cliques'... not real friends

they need superficial stuff in common to make themselves
feel like part of a group.. (..and on to insecurities,
etc.... )(what this whole thread is about, i dont need to
repeat it)

its good to have real friends.... they are really really
hard to find, and i think most people dont realize just how
rare they are... a lot of popular, socially 'successful'
people dont have real, close friends (most of them, i bet)

anyways, once you find real friends you realize how shallow,
fake, petty, etc the stupid clique you used to need to make
you feel accepted is.. (...even if they are relatively nice
people)

....or if you've already realized that (which i guess
everyone in this thread has, as i did), it just feels
amazing to have real friends... its completely and
unimstakably different than a clique...
its sad that a lot of people probably never get to learn the
difference

sorry, i dont mean to turn this in to some group-therapy
session, i just thought i'd share w/ u guys cus a lot of us
seem to be similar in this way, and up until very recently i
was in the clique boat..

...and while i still hang out with them at school....
(hey, its better than sitting alone, and besides like
titsworth said sometimes they are nice guys.. almost
friends, even)
....now that ive found some real, REAL friends i feel great

in fact, my depression is gone (well, going)..

dont get me wrong, i wasn't a loner before, i had "friends",
just the kind almost everyone has... which is to say,
members of the same clique


 

offline AMinal from Toronto (Canada) on 2002-10-09 17:39 [#00398249]
Points: 3476 Status: Regular



wow, that was quite long
hehe, i didn't mean to vent to you guys;)

what about you?

how many of you have REAL, close friends, or just hang out
with a 'clique'?


 

offline Amonbrune from Vancouver (Canada) on 2002-10-09 17:40 [#00398250]
Points: 7327 Status: Addict



cliques are for 14 year old girls to prove to boys how cool
they are. its supposed to turn them on or some freak junk.



 

offline AMinal from Toronto (Canada) on 2002-10-09 17:42 [#00398254]
Points: 3476 Status: Regular | Followup to Amonbrune: #00398250



most people live in cliques up into adulthood

sad, really....


 

offline Amonbrune from Vancouver (Canada) on 2002-10-09 17:43 [#00398257]
Points: 7327 Status: Addict



yeah it is sad. sad enough for me to cry and get a hotdog


 

offline pachi from yo momma (United States) on 2002-10-09 17:45 [#00398265]
Points: 8984 Status: Lurker



i'm not in a clique

i never see the point of them either


 

offline pachi from yo momma (United States) on 2002-10-09 17:47 [#00398269]
Points: 8984 Status: Lurker



as lao tsu once told me:

care too much for others' approval and you will be their
prisoner.


 

offline ward from Cheshire (United Kingdom) on 2002-10-09 17:57 [#00398288]
Points: 316 Status: Addict



i wear what I want, whic is usually scruffy pants &
t-shirts...


 

offline Ophecks from Nova Scotia (Canada) on 2002-10-09 17:57 [#00398289]
Points: 19190 Status: Moderator | Show recordbag



I can go whole days at college, hell, a WEEK, without
talking to one person.

I do NOT exaggerate when I say that I am a loner to the
tenth power.


 

offline Monoid from one source all things depend on 2002-10-09 18:07 [#00398314]
Points: 11010 Status: Lurker



Me too.....I usually talk to noone.....


 


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