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Giuseppi's story...
 

rF from a warm place on 2001-09-01 12:41 [#00028411]



another one lay back the pound.

Once again, I will post another Giuseppi's Story. It has
been a while since the first one (see the topic "My Go Now"
from a while back, around March), so here goes.

Giuseppi's Story

The moment Giuseppi woke up, he knew something was wrong. He
lifted his left arm, but it felt different. He tried to open
his eyes, but when he opened them, all he saw was red. After
about 30 seconds, he started to see something in front of
him. It looked vaguely like a warehouse. He got up, and as
soon as he started walking, he heard mechanical noises. He
looked at his legs, only to find that they were part
mechanical. He continued on, and when he reached the
warehouse, he found a small door on a platform. He entered
to find a large hallway with thousands of cardboard people
standing in straight lines. He noticed a few faces. One of
the people was his father, Mario (who was actually a beer
can). "Eh, Giuseppi, come getcha spaghetti, she'sa ready!"
he said. Giuseppi noticed the bowl of spaghetti on a table
at the end of the hall. He ran up to the table, sat down,
and ate it. He fell asleep.

When he woke up, he was in a room with a single desk at the
back wall. On the desk sat a computer, and through it music
was being pumped out from the high bass speakers in the
corners of the room. It sounded like Noodles. Suddenly, a
weird looking kid came running into the room. "Oh, you're
awake. I'm Marcello, who are you?" he said. Giuseppi
introduced himself.

"Hey Lucio, this kid's awake!" Marcello said, "His name's
Giuseppi, and he likes Noodles!"

"Wicked!" said Lucio, a rather tall kid with huge teeth that
stuck out of his mouth as if he had been chewing rocks. If
he tried, he could probably eat corn on the cob through a
picket fence.

"You played Quake IV?" Lucio asked.
"Yeah, but never against humans," Giuseppi answered.
"Wanna play a multiplayer game?" asked Marcello.
"Yeah, what level?" enquired Giuseppi, licking a nearby
dog's front buck tooth, which was hard because it didn't
have any teeth.
"The Knockle?" Marcello asked.
"Cool!" said Giuseppi.

They played the game, and Giuseppi beat all of them, even
those playing with their knockles. Afterwards, they had to
walk one step forward, one step backward, turn around 3
times and jump forward. They immediately went outside,
passed GO and collected $200. Then they fell down a well.

"What?" Giuseppi said.
"Negative Alpha Index!" said Lucio.
"Huh?" said Giuseppi, quizzically.
"The music playing!" Marcello replied with the strength of a
piece of metal coated with ice cream (including caramel).
Giuseppi hadn't noticed the music playing from a stereo in
the well.
"Hey look, there's a door here!" Lucio pointed out. He
opened it and they went through.

A huge cow greeted them. "Hello!" Lucio said. Without any
pause, they all ducked as a frog bounced by. The cow
laughed, then pulled a lever that made someone run out of a
small cage in the corner of the room. He was a small kid,
with white hair, tiny eyes and huge glasses balancing on his
pointy nose. "My name's Nort. Who are you?" he asked.
Marcello introduced himself and his friends. They were led
to a large computer with a 'daily message' displayed on the
screen. It said, "To Deny Is To Not Accept What Is Not
Ungiven!!!" Marcello looked at it and laughed.

"Hey, you like [-a] too?" asked Lucio.
"How the hell did you just say that? Yeah, I’ve got their
new CD..." Nort answered.
"I guess we'll be living here for a while," Marcello said,
"So we better find somewhere to sleep."

Nort showed them to a large room with four beds, a bar
fridge, and a strange one-eyed dog inside. "This is the
guest room. Jack, get out of here!" Nort said. The dog -
Jack - slowly disintegrated.

The next day, they had to shoot a poor innocent duck with a
water pistol, and dig a hole in the concrete, which was
pretty hard to do only using hands. Once they finished, they
filled it up with water. The water bubbled furiously, and
overflowed underground on top of a small big half of a
fearless tractor's tyre, but Marcello didn't care. He and
the others remained silent. All of a sudden, the cow came
running in, holding the inside of a pencil in his hands. On
the ground he drew a picture of the fearless tractor,
without a door. He said, "Now, if you plan on finding the
door of this tractor, you must go outside."

They went outside, but couldn't find the door, so they went
back inside and killed the cow. "Die, traitor!!!!" said
Nort. Marcello stared at the ground, looking for a sudden
opening. Then it happened: a hole opened in the ground,
sending Marcello and his friends back to his place, where
the stereo was still pumping out NOODLES songs. "Ah, we had
it on repeat!" said Marcello, looking at the computer, which
had suddenly become a twisted heap. "Looks like we don't
have a twisting time-warp superior to get us back to the
well anymore. I guess we'll have to stay here until we get
another jug of that fluid - what is it? - oh yeah,
tetracarbon disulphate decaoxide. But we'll have to combine
it with a bichromium hydroxide to get it working. Then we
can mix it with Coke and get a thick liquid!!!" Nort said.
Suddenly, a jug of the fluid appeared in front of them. They
immediately combined the "Wanceo Beroletero" with the
bichromium hydroxide.

“Excellent! Now we can go back to the well!” Nort
exclaimed. Suddenly, they teleported into the well, which
had suddenly become very dark. Then Marcello turned on the
light. “Oh, ok then! Let’s find Jack!” he said. They
searched the rooms, and found Jack hiding inside the bar
fridge which had somehow moved into the toilet.
“Eeeewwwww!!!” said Nort, with a sickening tone of
voice. “Someone’s put generic brand cola in here!”.
Suddenly, he picked up the can of cola and hurled it across
the room. They returned to the main room, where the [-a] CD
was still playing. “Hey, that’s my favourite song!!!”
screamed Marcello. “I went to that concert! It was the
Polygonal Distortion no-stop tour, with that other kickass
band, The Coughing Snakes!!! Hey, I think there’s another
concert on tonight! It’s free! Let us go. Time is of the
essence.”



 

|REFLEX| from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada on 2001-09-01 12:46 [#00028414]



oh man.. I love the Coughing Snakes

 

|REFLEX| from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada on 2001-09-01 12:54 [#00028421]



Start On Bottom..

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:45 AM, r3fl3x said :
I SHALL

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:45 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
ok i must go now... bah... can you compile all the nonsense
from the history and post it? i want it to be seen by all
eyes

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:44 AM, r3fl3x said :
NATIONAL SPeAKERS TALK in THE FRENCHS GERNAMN

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:44 AM, r3fl3x said :
oh okay.. thats fine cause when I was over on the car tree,
he told me {the grasshopper that is} that you were not
coming to flantallee.. but yet you were sitting on the plain
of sky planes only wishing upon a graggeer poltop

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:44 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
national talent talks in europe

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:43 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
NO! i shall wake when you pass my donkey syrup... don't
waste time thinking about horses, you'll only buy fridge
magnets! to save time, deconstruct a user menu and
mackeidoriu

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:42 AM, r3fl3x said :
grandular fat man walks on the breath of us all, fair not
fair goosebump I shall vanquish all that is blueish green.

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:42 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
oh gee.

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:42 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
into a book i go i go, into a book i go.ooo.... ooo. o ..
ooo . o

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:41 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
sifting through turtles, i seemed to be in possesion of a
grass radio, where i started talking about semiconductor
physics.

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:41 AM, r3fl3x said :
lifes mircale! one of many jews and hate towards beany tree
smelling hype growers! how I love thee smoke riddden filth
grime tasters

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:40 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
pin it down to the waxy underground overtop on off the pixel
dynamic of a turkey dye machine

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:39 AM, r3fl3x said :
YES! NO! MAYBE SO!.... 4 2 6 8 you can watch me masterbate!
*NOT REALLY* .......... get youw oman on the floor foor the
1 and only milea! pizaao! wone!

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:39 AM, r3fl3x said :
riding horses wavelenght square unit track fake hair
infomercial

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:39 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
thats the spirit

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:39 AM, r3fl3x said :
gege ge jelly bean moon walking platypus dog man tree foam

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:39 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
skiing on a leather monitor

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:38 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
poodle walking on the brain side of a bus

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:37 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
nosound? no? yes. no. no yes why kyoo

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:37 AM, r3fl3x said :
WEN!

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:37 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
pee em

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:37 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
seven thirty seven

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:36 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
blue

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:36 AM, r3fl3x said :
ARE GREY!

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:36 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
takky horses

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:35 AM, r3fl3x said :
NAKER

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:35 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
prOOF reAd a NOOdle nocKLE

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:28 AM, r3fl3x said :
YES

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:28 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
i can post this on the mb?

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:28 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
LOOK MUMMY, I CAN FLY!!!! *THUD*... ..........

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:26 AM, r3fl3x said :
whuh!?

On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:26 AM, rob_fragilenine said :
HOY HOY HOY.. *BANG*... *COUGH*. ohhhhhhhh, i don't feel too
good...



 

|REFLEX| from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada on 2001-09-01 12:55 [#00028422]



On Sat, Sep 1, 2001, 5:42 AM, r3fl3x said :
grandular fat man walks on the breath of us all, fair not
fair goosebump I shall vanquish all that is blueish green.

is my fav.

 

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