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wildrover
from springfield (United States) on 2002-07-23 16:25 [#00321310]
Points: 472 Status: Lurker
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Beer belly saves man's life Attack leaves 18-inch wound, but doesn't reach internal organs
JULY 12, 2002 - A Birmingham, England, man who was attacked with a power saw says his beer belly probably saved his life. Shaun Reaney, who weighs 22 stone (about 308 pounds), is recovering in hospital after being slashed across the stomach.
Reaney suffered an 18-inch wound when he was attack by four men. His beer belly kept the blade of a circular saw from touching his internal organs.
"It's a good job I had that layer to protect me," he told a local newspaper. His wife, Theresa, added: "The doctors told me if he had been 10 stone lighter he would have died. When Shaun came round he reminded me that years of boozing had saved his life."
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smokehammer
from Saigon (Vietnam) on 2002-07-23 16:30 [#00321316]
Points: 1463 Status: Lurker
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hehe...
except he would have been able to run away from them in the first place if he'd been 10 stone lighter.... an oversight on the part of the writer methinks :)
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ExHore
from Stamford, Ct. (United States) on 2002-07-23 16:32 [#00321318]
Points: 2157 Status: Regular
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wow
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wildrover
from springfield (United States) on 2002-07-23 16:33 [#00321319]
Points: 472 Status: Lurker
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that just goes to show, we all need to drink more!
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smokehammer
from Saigon (Vietnam) on 2002-07-23 16:35 [#00321321]
Points: 1463 Status: Lurker
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bah, you just want an excuse to drink more LOL
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wildrover
from springfield (United States) on 2002-07-23 16:38 [#00321329]
Points: 472 Status: Lurker
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well yeah, not that i need an excuse, i do work at a brewery, so i do a lot of quality control work while i'm there, if you know what i mean
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smokehammer
from Saigon (Vietnam) on 2002-07-23 16:41 [#00321331]
Points: 1463 Status: Lurker
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I bet you do.. :D mm... a brewery in Springfield . .. do you supply Duff beer to a hole named Moes ? ;D
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ExHore
from Stamford, Ct. (United States) on 2002-07-23 16:42 [#00321335]
Points: 2157 Status: Regular
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what if your a skinny beer drinker?...like me?
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wildrover
from springfield (United States) on 2002-07-23 17:03 [#00321362]
Points: 472 Status: Lurker
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you won't be skinny for long, trust me! i once was a skinny beer drinker, not any more!
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ExHore
from Stamford, Ct. (United States) on 2002-07-23 17:06 [#00321369]
Points: 2157 Status: Regular
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yay :).
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wildrover
from springfield (United States) on 2002-07-23 17:08 [#00321375]
Points: 472 Status: Lurker
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especially if you drink paper city beer, which will be coming to stamford CT this fall, we just got our distributors liscence for your state!
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wildrover
from springfield (United States) on 2002-07-23 17:34 [#00321414]
Points: 472 Status: Lurker
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*bump*
more people need to read this!
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deadwhitespoon
from Vancouver (Canada) on 2002-07-23 17:43 [#00321422]
Points: 271 Status: Lurker
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Obviously these guys didn't think about the job they needed to get done. Kids, it's always important to use the proper tools for the job you have at hand. The circular saw has a very limited depth to it's cutting abilities. It's good for straight lines across realitively thin, solid surfaces like plywood, or your skull. A large gut requires more of a machete, for skinning and peeling, or a chainsaw for a quick, neat job. And don't for get tool maintenance. Always clean you tools in bleach or lye for particularly chunky pieces or work.
If your looking for a belly, I recommend doughnuts and chips over beer.
If you're going to fo a job, do it right the first time.
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afxNUMB
from So.Flo on 2002-07-23 17:50 [#00321431]
Points: 7099 Status: Regular
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Gross---some some pot Belly guy is now saved, watch after he gets out of the hospital he's going to stop drinking, get skinny and BAM get hit by a car.
"Kids you tried your best but failed miserably, the lesson is-never try"Homer J.Simpson
The man of many words.
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wildrover
from springfield (United States) on 2002-07-23 18:27 [#00321479]
Points: 472 Status: Lurker
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*bump*
this is a good laugh
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weatheredstoner
from same shit babes. (United States) on 2002-07-23 19:27 [#00321519]
Points: 12585 Status: Lurker
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Its a good thing I was full of THC when my attacker stabbed me in my scrotum. If I hadn't smoked that joint earlier I would have passed out from all the pain. Luckily it was some good Dank that numbed my entire body enough to last until the ambulance showed up.
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afxNUMB
from So.Flo on 2002-07-23 19:31 [#00321521]
Points: 7099 Status: Regular | Followup to weatheredstoner: #00321519
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I think your story is more believable then the fat guys story, but wait youre probably a muncher so either way its a good thing
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pachi
from yo momma (United States) on 2002-07-23 20:43 [#00321565]
Points: 8984 Status: Lurker
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is this an excuse to drink more? =p
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